advice about wedding memorial day weekend vs weekend before

[ringster]

i''m trying to figure out the pros and cons of holding a wedding may 24 a sat evening (memorial weekend) vs the sat the week before may 17.

the location is in the north of san francisco in mill valley area (all guests will have to cross some body of water to get there -- most prob will need to take the golden gate bridge)

pros : people get a long weekend to spend in san francisco/bay area and don''t need to rush home, out of town people will really need to get on planning for this so i should not have too many last minute attendees

cons : busy holiday weekend, might be harder to get vendors although i am only getting photog and maybe some irish music and/or dj, more expensive plane fare and hotel for out of towners

can anyone think of any other pros or cons or have any preference?

 

[neatfreak]

Many people will not show. That could be a pro or con depending on how you look at it! If you are someone who is having a big wedding and will be hurt when some friends don''t come, a holiday weekend isn''t a good choice. If you''re having a small intimate wedding with only super close people, then chances are those people will come, so a holiday weekend could be fine.

You just need to decide how you feel about some people not wanting to travel that weekend or already having plans. The people who are really important will be there for sure, but some of the "fringe" people won''t show. Is that important to you or not?

 

[Foureyes]

Date: 12/2/2007 1:01:21 PM
Author: neatfreak
Many people will not show. That could be a pro or con depending on how you look at it! If you are someone who is having a big wedding and will be hurt when some friends don''t come, a holiday weekend isn''t a good choice. If you''re having a small intimate wedding with only super close people, then chances are those people will come, so a holiday weekend could be fine.


You just need to decide how you feel about some people not wanting to travel that weekend or already having plans. The people who are really important will be there for sure, but some of the ''fringe'' people won''t show. Is that important to you or not?

Ditto to this. Like I''ve mentioned on other parts of the board, I''m having a Dec. 31st wedding, and many people that I wanted there just won''t be there. We''re having a really intimate wedding (around 20 -30 ppl), so I thought this would be a good thing. However, when I started getting rejections from people I really wanted to be there (like my FI''s family) I was really kind of hurt. If you have a holiday wedding, I guess you just have to be prepared if some people (including close relatives) can''t make it there, and not take it personally.

 

[Class n Sass]

I am getting married May 24, 2008. I picked this day for the very same reason that you mentioned regarding the long weekend. I figure that many people will have the Monday off and won''t have to rush to get back home. I sent Save the Dates so that people will have the day in mind and won''t plan a vacation if they really want to attend my wedding. In my situation most of the people we are inviting will be attending even though it is a a holdiay weekend. I booked all of my vendors about 6 months ago because I thought things may get booked quickly because its a holiday weekend. All I need to book at this point are the limos.

 

[DiamanteBlu]

They will either show up or they won''t. Some will come because it is a 3-day weekend, others won''t for the same reason.

I would suggest that you do what is best for you. Forget about everybody else''s schedule.

 

[zoebartlett]

I actually like the option of having a wedding over a long holiday weekend. I know people like to make their own plans, but I think that with plenty of notice, people could plan accordingly. My cousin went got married over Memorial Day wekeend this past May and it worked out really well for my family, who had to travel from another state. My FI and I ended up taking one day off anyway because we were driving over 8 hours, and we didn''t want to rush. To me, weddings over holiday weekends are perfect because people may not want to have to take a day off from work and this way, they don''t have to.

 

[basil]

My family always goes away to our vacation house on long weekends...July 4th, Memorial Day, Columbus Day, and Labor Day. It''s like the only time we are all there at one time. So I hate it when people have their weddings on these weekends because then I miss it. I understand that everyone is not like this.

 

[ringster]

thanks for all of the great input. definitely alot of good points made.

we are going this afternoon to take a last look at the place. the weekend before memorial weekend was tentatively booked so we may not have a choice.

i was suprised that memorial weekend was open but after reading your input i can see why it was one of the last dates available.

family will be available so that is the most important and i think the main circle is available.

one last question : any pros/cons about the sat vs the sun of memorial weekend?

sat
-- pros : people have rest of sun and mon to do as they please
-- con : ? harder than sun to book vendors

sun
-- pros : ? easier than sat to book vendors
-- cons : middle of the vacation weekend

thanks again

ETA : ~90-100 people

 

[Class n Sass]

 

[Class n Sass]

Maybe I am biased because my wedding day is 5/24/08 However I think the Saturday is a better option. I think if you get busy right away with selecting vendors you will still be able to get some good picks.

Isn''t one of the points of having the wedding on a long holiday weekend so that your guests won''t have to rushed to going back to work and not have to take a day off? If the wedding is on Saturday they can go home if they want on Sunday and still have Monday to themself to relax before work on Tuesday.

If the wedding is on Sunday and they go home on Monday they will have to go straight back to work on Tuesday with no "down-time" so to speak. Just my opinion.

 

[brazen_irish_hussy]

I would go with sunday. Not only are more vendors available, at least where I am they are a lot cheeper on days other than fri/sat. As a guest I don''t think it would matter if the next day is a holiday anyway.

 

[swimmer]

Hi Ringster,
OK, I''m totally biased because I''m getting married 5/25/08. We didn''t have to decide between sat and sun since we are Jewish and if you get married on a Saturday it has to be after sunset...which is sorta late down south. What we have found in planning a Mem Day weekend where lots of people have to travel, is that guests are using it as an extended road-trip/vacation. I figured that having it on a vacation would mean that lots of "fringe" folks wouldn''t be able to make it b/c of travel/hotel/etc. But we are finding that almost all of our invitees are coming (and in one super awkward instance, a couple who were invited by my FMIL is bringing her 2 adult kids, their spouses, and their under 5yr old children...yeah, an invitation to "Faye and George" got us 11 total guests...not even sure what to do about that {sorry about the digression!}) The point that i''m STRIVING to make is that a vacation weekend means that some people that you think won''t be able to make it, do come! (and if they are socially awkward they bring their entire family!!!!)

I suppose predicting shows vs no-shows is an art/science that is un-masterable, but having it on Sunday is making it cheaper for almost all of our vendors and folks can still travel on Monday. I like having the extra day to prepare, get all of my friends together...I don''t know about your distance, but rehearsal dinner on Saturday is more possible to get to than friday...then again, if you want to keep it small, that is also something to consider. Whatever you decide, it will be fantastic. Just keep your fingers crossed with the weather!

 

[Haven]

My FI and I are getting married on a holiday, July 4th, and we decided that anyone who isn''t willing to give up the morning of this holiday to be at our wedding just doesn''t care about us enough for it to matter. We''re planning everything knowing that this may happen, and we are okay with that.

As for Saturday or Sunday, I''d say it''s really a toss up. Be careful assuming that you''re going to save some money by having your wedding on the Sunday of a holiday weekend, because most vendors (in Chicago, at least) charge you the same for a holiday weekend as they do for a Saturday, so you probably won''t save anything.

Good luck choosing! Either way, you''ll make it work for you!

 

[ringster]

thanks class n sass, brazen irish hussy (love your handle!), swimmer and haven!

it helps to get input from people who have already experience with getting vendors during a holiday period or this exact time period.

class n sass, that was my thinking too that having it on a sat allows people to still enjoy their holiday at home or in the bay area.

although the vendor issue would be prob easier on sunday.

we went ahead and put a deposit down on the sat just so that we have a date at least and asked them if may 3 or may 17 become available this week (both are on tentative hold) that i would take first may 3 and then possibly may 17 but i may end up keeping may 24 because of the long weekend.

but thanks so much for sharing your thoughts and experience!

 

[blondie23]

Ditto to Class n Sass. My wedding day is May 25, 2008 and I sent out STD and have already made a hotel room-block for OOT guests. Also, I booked most of my vendors about 6 months ago as well.

 

[misysu2]

My wedding is on 5-25-08 (Sunday of Mem Day weekend), and I have heard only excitement! Yes, it''s a holiday weekend, but I don''t know anyone who really DOES anything special for Memorial Day weekend. It''s not like New Year''s or 4th of July, you know? Everyone is happy to have an excuse to get out of the house and away from the bbq.