Advice on a gift for FMIL.

[stermag]

Okay, I decided to pose this question to the LIW, as opposed to the wider forum, since it has less to do with specific stones and more with just general gift-giving...and you gals have such great ideas/taste... and so I am in need of your wisdom

My boyfriend''s mom turns 60 in a couple of weeks. As it''s a fairly momentous occasion, my BF and his brother are considering buying her a nice piece of diamond jewelery. Between the two of them and myself (since I''m pitching in), our budget is probably around $1500... perhaps as much as $2000.

My initial idea was to find a nice RHR with six small diamonds (one for each decade she''s celebrating), but now I''m not entirely convinced that this would be any better than say, a modest pair of nice diamond studs, a solitaire pendant (~.5ct) or perhaps a tennis bracelet.

His mom is a very classy lady and a beautiful woman. She likes jewelery and I think diamonds really suit her, but I''m just not sure what type of jewelery we should really focus on.

If you have specific suggestions, feel free to post links and/or photos... otherwise, if you just want to vote (ring, bracelet, earrings or necklace of sorts) do chime in. I''ll be eternally grateful.

 

[JulieN]

I''d highlight her best feature (or cover up a not so best feature.) Earrings are a no if she has saggy earlobes. Necklace is good if she has deep hollows near her collarbone.

 

[Scintillating]

How sweet you are! What a nice thing to do for her.
Does she have a diamond pendant? If no - then that''s what *I think* you should go for.
*Everyone* (hehehe) should have a diamond pendant.

Something super classic like this maybe?

Or

Here''s The Pendant Thread For Ideas...

Scintillating...

 

[stermag]

Ah Scintillating, that pendant is very nice. And Virginia, if Matadora''s necklace is the one I''m thinking of (was it a saphire surrounded by diamonds?) it really IS divine. I''ve been trying to find the thread again, to no avail... but I''ll keep looking

It did cross my mind to get something with her birth stone, which is an aquamarine (I''ve just found this out). I love blue but I think I prefer the darker blue of saphires ... of course this is hardly about what I prefer, but rather about what she would really love.

So, how do I describe her? She''s the type of woman who looks good in anything and can pull off a variety of looks. She is fair, with blond''ish hair, blue eyes and freckles. She likes costume jewelery and loves to accessorize. Her rings, however, are fairly dainty, and are all in white gold. Her engagement ring is a delicate diamond solitaire with the center stone no bigger than .5ct. So, I happen to think that a delicate tennis bracelet would look lovely on her hand... but if we decided to go for a necklace, it would have to be a bit more substantial, a bit more bold...

The right-hand ring idea is still very much in the running.... I saw some nice candidates at Whiteflash. Perhaps something like this, in Platinum?

The studs, I think, are out.... as someone mentioned the earlobes and I think perhaps she might perfer earrings that are more substantial and cover a larger part of the ear.

I''ll keep digging around and posting potential candidates for your review, if you are so inclined. Thanks so much everyone!

 

[jaysonsmom]

I''m not a LIW, but I''m adding my 2 cents. I think the RHR you posted is too modern looking for a women of that (ahem) maturity. It looks like something a person in their 20''s or 30''s would wear. I think the solitaire pendant or stud earrings would be better for someone that age. Plus, rings are very subjective, especially if you look right down and see it all the time.

 

[marvel]

my two cents

 

[marvel]

badler.com

 

[marvel]

so many pretty things

 

[marvel]

How about something with her birthstone (Aquamarine?)

 

[laine]

I like the idea of a pendant. Thinking about my own mother, I would hesitate to buy her a ring, she has her favorites that she always wears, and I know shes not the tennis bracelet type, it seems to me you either love them or you don''t, and if you don''t know that FMIL does, I''d shy away from that idea.

And personally speaking, I rarely wear rings, bracelets, or earrings that others bought me, I stick to the basics that I love. Pendants, on the other hand, I''m more likely to wear a variety of styles.

I like the idea of something like Matatora''s necklace, but with FMIL''s birthstone. You could go with white gold and a plain chain, and then get a little more bang for your buck with the stone.

 

[stermag]

Marvel, those are positively stunning. Thank you.

And Jaysonsmom - I think you''re right in that the ring is modern... although I guess when I think of my BF''s mom, it hardly sinks in that she''s turning 60. My own parents are considerably younger and yet I perceive their age differently. Nevertheless, the point is well taken... and I do think that rings are a bit more difficult to buy than, say, pendants or necklaces.

Now, if I can only find that thread with Matadora''s pendant - at least I think it was Matadora''s - very similar to some of the ones posted here.

Danke.

 

[stermag]

Yay, I found it!!!!

It's here!

Btw, I'm referring to Matadora's gorgeous pendant, of course....

This is great inspiration. I think this would be pretty wonderful. Very similar to the Badler pieces. I'm going to have to look into this some more.

I'll run this by BF and his brother and see what they think. Thanks everyone.

ETA: Marvel, thanks again for your suggestions. You are, in a word, brilliant

 

[akw94]

I''d go with a necklace or bracelet. I think the necklaces shown are beautiful, especially the last. Also, a tennis bracelet is certainly a classic and would be wonderful. If you want something a bit more unique, probably the necklace. Also, keep in mind her wrist size when selecting a bracelet and her preference for necklace length.
Whatever you choose sounds like it will be great. It''s a very nice and thoughtful idea.

 

[stermag]

Okay, so now it gets tricky. Hopefully someone is still reading this.

BF has been out of town so we haven''t had a chance to discuss details, but I caught his brother online and decided to run by him a pic of Matadora''s pendant (which I simply adore).

He really liked it but, out of the blue, said "I already got a ring for mom." Oh? Curious, I ask for details, and he tells me he bought it online (

) at an auction (

) run by the police, to get rid of stolen and seized goods (

).

He then offered to share the gift with us, so that it could be both from him AND his brother. A nice thought, honestly, since the birthday is around the corner and getting something to arrive on time would be a stretch, particularly since she''s in the UK and we''re in the States... however... uhm.... well.... why don''t I just show you all the link to the auction:

http://www.bumblebeeauctions.co.uk/XcAPViewItem.asp?ID=20354.

Evidently, bro paid 30 quid for this piece... so, a $50 dollar ring, for his mom''s 60th birthday, and not only that... we don''t even know what it is, what size it is, and whose hands it''s been through? Both of her sons are now in their 30s, make a good living and can definitely afford a modest, but tasteful gift, given some thought and effort. But his argument was that his mom wouldn''t wear anything "valuable". I hate to argue, or claim to know better but... as a woman, and based on what I''ve seen of his mother, I happen to think she would REALLY enjoy a beautiful piece of jewelery that''s been well thought out and made just for her. She might only wear it on special occasions but so what?

And what really doesn''t make sense to me is that he said he plans on getting it valued, just to make sure it isn''t "worth something"... and suggested that, if it is, and his mom doesn''t like it, he''ll just sell it for profit.

Now, I LOVE my BF''s family, and I love his brother, he''s a really good guy, really affectionate and caring, but... dare I say ... this is going a little far in his frugal ways? I say "frugal" even though another word comes to mind.

Sigh.

Sorry this is so long, I''ve just become invested in this little project and hoped to help make something really spectacular for her (I enjoy gift giving, you see) but now, if my boyfriend decides to simply take the path of least resistance and sign his name under that auctioned ring... there''s nothing left for me to do but perhaps pick up a birthday card.

It just seems so sad. I hope BF decides to go in on a nice pendant with me.

What do you all make of this situation? I hope I haven''t painted him in too negative a light, I''m just a little outraged.

 

[Erin]

VERY strange choice for a gift for anyone - let alone your mother - let alone for her 60th birthday.

When I looked at it my only reaction was, wwwwwhhhhhhhaaaaaaat???? <--- said kind of whiney

 

[Erin]

pic of ring

 

[firebirdgold]

YYEEEEEEEEEEEEEKKKKKKKK!!!!!

Ok, that thing is dreadful! And I love the description 'Yellow Metal Ring with Stones". ACK!

So here's my suggestion:

I think it would make an excellent FMIL gift, and with all the various sizes, there should be something that would fit your budget. Plus it'll look bigger than it is, not to mention being very unique and special looking.


ETA: To whom it may concern: I apologize in advance if my negative reaction insulted your grandma's ring... er I meant your lovely ring. *cough*

AETA: MEN!

I swear some of them must be missing something in their genetic code!

 

[stermag]

Oh my gosh, when I see the picture, outside of the context of its auction... I suddenly feel so bad. I mean, maybe he thought it was really nice, maybe he thought she would really like it but....

Is it really bad? Is there a chance that, in a 3D world, it will be nice?

Maybe I''m being elitist and unfair. Maybe he put a lot of thought into this but... oh darn it. I just really wanted to knock her socks off with something, and I don''t think this will do it.

Btw, girls - I just realized - a month or so ago, the brother asked me to help him find a ring for his gf of 10 years. They''ve decided to get married in 2007 and even have a venue booked. I just hope that, in his attempts to do any type of research, he doesn''t stumble upon this here post.

Don''t be surprised if suddenly my comments here disappear. Smirk.

 

[FireGoddess]

Um, I''m not gonna sugar coat it. That auction ring is hideous. I wouldn''t buy it for my mom for any occasion, let alone a milestone.

I definitely wouldn''t "go in" on it....I''d see what you and your BF can scrounge together for a lovely pendant. I loved the idea of something like Matadora''s, but with less funds I still think you can get something beautiful.

 

[akw94]

Sorry to hear your bf''s brother picked something, not quite to your liking.

I think that what you said earlier, about telling your bf and letting him decide what to do, is probably best. I know you want to do something special but you can always do it for another occasion. What about this Mother''s Day, if the bday doesn''t work out? Then perhaps all 3 of you can go in on the gift as previously planned. If you want to get something very special, it might be worth waiting. If he would still be happy w/just him and you going in together, then you can find something a little less expensive (which i''m sure you still find something very nice). But if he really would prefer going in w/his brother, i''m not sure it''s worth fighting about. I tend to be someone who likes to give very nice gifts also, usually spend too much and attempt to put a lot of thought into the gift. When I ask my bf about gift ideas for his mom, I don''t generally get too far. Men do seem to be a bit out of touch at times. Very frustrating!

So I''d try not to worry too, too much, if possible...

 

[coda72]

Stermag, I''m not fond of the auction ring either, and I don''t really think it''s appropriate for a milestone birthday. My vote is for a tennis bracelet. I absolutely love my Whiteflash bracelet, and with your budget, you would easily be able to afford the 2 carat 3 prong one in white gold. The bracelet doesn''t take long for them to make, so I''m sure you could have it to her in time.

 

[marvel]

Yellow Metal Ring with Stones, Hallmarked, Dark Blue Central Stone with Eight White Stones Around

YIKES!!

Stermag, Maybe your FBIL can give that gift to his mom on his own, and you and B/F can find a more appropriate gift. She's going to love that ring b/c it's from her son. But, as a woman, she will also appreciate a beautiful piece of jewelry from you and your B/F.

Good Luck!

Edit to add...a police aution to boot

 

[stermag]

Virginia,

You''re so sweet to inquire

Yes, BF and I decided to find something on our own, and are in the process of searching for or building a pear pendant. We''ve decided on a blue stone (sapphire ideally, but we''re flexible since our budget is somewhat restrictive) and either a very narrow/tiny halo or just a bezel setting of sorts.

Check out the thread in the Colored Stones forum, here. I''ve posted some inspiration pieces and Ana (who is the best, as always) has chimed in with some comments.... but obviously, the more the better.

Thanks again!

M

 

[stermag]

Virginia,

We haven''t ruled out Aqua, but I was concerned that it might look a bit washed out, since it''s tough to find one in a richer color.

Also, his mom is a blonde and I''ve been told she really loves sapphires... hence a sapphire, or at least a rich cobalt blue stone might be more to her liking and more considerate of her taste. After all, if she doesn''t like her birthstone (not that I know this for a fact) it serves no good to force it on her....

Just my current thinking. Doesn''t mean I won''t eat these very words one day