Am I planning too early?

[Treasure43]

My fiance and I are getting married on Sept. 18, 2010 and I''ve already started basic planning. I went wedding dress shopping just to look and happened to find THE dress. I also went with a couple of girls in my party just to scope bridesmaids dresses and ended up picking out the ones I wanted. We also have a florist, DJ, and venue although we''ve put down no deposits and signed nothing yet. ANYWAY, FMIL feels I''m doing things to fast and I may regret my decisions and FI has said he''s worried I''ll have it planned in a week. My thought is thatI''m a school teacher starting school and once the school year starts I''ll have VERY limited time to do anything until next summer so I''d like to get some preliminares down. I don''t know. I can''t seem to do anything right. Every decision I make seems to worry or irritate SOMEONE.

 

[cocolaw]

much better this way than delaying everything. you have no idea how many small details you will have to plan as the months go on! and welcome to the club, it doesn''t matter what you do, you fmil will find fault. i hope i''m wrong!

 

[cocolaw]

i think it is great that you are getting so much done!!!

 

[cindygenit]

NO!!!

Its never too early to start planning

The more prepared you are, the better off you will be in the long run

 

[Luckyeshe]

Date: 8/26/2009 9:42:47 PM
Author:Treasure43
My fiance and I are getting married on Sept. 18, 2010 and I''ve already started basic planning. I went wedding dress shopping just to look and happened to find THE dress. I also went with a couple of girls in my party just to scope bridesmaids dresses and ended up picking out the ones I wanted. We also have a florist, DJ, and venue although we''ve put down no deposits and signed nothing yet. ANYWAY, FMIL feels I''m doing things to fast and I may regret my decisions and FI has said he''s worried I''ll have it planned in a week. My thought is thatI''m a school teacher starting school and once the school year starts I''ll have VERY limited time to do anything until next summer so I''d like to get some preliminares down. I don''t know. I can''t seem to do anything right. Every decision I make seems to worry or irritate SOMEONE.

Hello, date twin!

I''m the same as you!! Are you a taurus by any chance?

. Anyways, we have all of the guys'' clothes picked out, no DJ gonna use IPOD, we have our cake, makeup artist, hairstylist, gonna pick venue out of 3 then put deposit when he comes to see me next (we''re LDR), photog, flowers/centerpieces, and invites already picked. In my mind, it''s better to be ahead of schedule than behind. I actually want to be done planning the wedding 2 months before the actual event so that I could try to relax and destress. KWIM? Maybe you shouldn''t tell him exactly what you have already planned...maybe your FI just wants to keep enjoying the engagement and there''s nothing wrong with that. Make sure to give him some jobs like tuxes and stuff so he knows you don''t have that all checked off on the list hence you''re not too ahead of schedule. Also, when school starts again, you won''t have time to plan you wedding and he''ll see that and hopefully he''ll stop thinking that you''ll have regrets with how much you have planned for your wedding already since you won''t be doing too many wedding related stuff. Hope this helps! But I want you to know that you''re not alone since I''m ahead of schedule too!

 

[RissaLou]

I personally think it''s never too early to start planning, especially because there is soo very much to do. Our wedding date is Sept. 4th of 2010 and I have already been planning for three months now. I have put the deposit down on our venue, just bought the dress yesterday (which I absolutely love by the way!!), my good friend will be the officiant she is already ordained, my sister''s boyfriend will be the DJ, my sister''s best friend will be doing my hair and make-up, I have already found the bridesmaid dresses, and picked the colors and flowers. I haven''t put a deposit down on these things yet, but I have already found a photographer and a caterer. I haven''t found a baker yet or decided on the perfect wedding invatations, or decided on a bunch of other little things.
I guess my point is that the earlier the better and if you find "The One" no matter what it is I doubt you will change your mind or regret your choice, my only peice of advice would be, when you find something, DON''T KEEP LOOKING, that''s what will get you in trouble, just be happy and confidant about all of your decisions.
Hope that helped.

 

[RissaLou]

Oh I almost forgot, this is YOUR and your fi''s wedding day, NOT your FMIL or anyone else''s, just thank them for their advice and say that you appreciate their concern but that you are not worried and that planning ahead of time makes you happy and takes some weight of your shoulders, and I doubt they are truly irritated they probably just want you to be happy and have your best interest at heart. Tell you fi not to worry and that it would be helpful if you had his support with your choices. This is suppose to be an exciting and fun time, focus on that.

 

[cocolaw]

yeah, bit ditto to don''t keep looking!!!!!!!!!

 

[princessplease]

Not at all!!!! I start my 2nd year of my master's program on Tuesday, and will be unable to intensely plan anything, which is why everything is mostly finished. I figured I need to dedicate a lot of time to school, and can't spend weekends driving to visit photogs, DJ's, florists, dress shops, accessory shopping and venues.
We have the venue booked and signed, DJ booked (music picked already), photog booked, florist booked (with ideas of what we want), I have my dress, shoes, all of my accessories. We have the GM's, BM's and FI's outfits picked out. Officiant will be a close friend of mine, so we're writing our own ceremony. I already have my invite company picked out, along with my guest book done. I have all of the little things we need (flutes, serving set, reserved signs for the ceremony, cake topper, centerpieces [provided by the location] and favor idea
The only things left undone are the cake (my caterer includes a cake, and she's changing bakers, or else it would've been done 2 weeks ago), flower girl outfits, ceremony, and ceremony and reception decor. I do have visions for those, though.

 

[cleokizzy]

nonsense! it''s never TOO early for planning a wedding! specially if it is YOUR wedding your planning for!

 

[Winslet]

I'd just to like to chime in as someone who's had a long engagement. It is never too early to begin planning the big things (like booking any and all vendors). However, decide on the actual details (centerpieces, flowers, accessories, favors, stationary, etc. etc...) closer to the wedding because you WILL change your mind and wish you had waited until you had a more cohesive "idea" of what you wanted overall (and this can take time to figure out). You should start thinking about these things now, but don't commit to anything until it's time. That said, it sounds like you are right on track with what you have now

 

[MakingTheGrade]

Hehe, I had my dress in my closet a year before my wedding..

 

[Dannielle]

I am getting married in December 2010.. so far we have put a deposit on our reception, I am putting a deposit on my wedding dress this afternoon and I found the bridesmaid dresses I like online this week.

I don''t think there is a thing as planning to early- better to be prepared!

 

[Honey228]

RissaLou, we''re date twins and it sounds like we''ve been planning for about the same amount of time.

So yeah, I''d much rather have everything planned now than waiting to the last minute. I figure that I''ll have more time for DIY projects and if those don''t work out then I''ll still have time to execute a back up plan. So far we''ve booked our ceremony site, reception site and catering, cake, officiant, musicians, photographer, and hotel rooms. I have my dress, jewelry, and shoes. We have our wedding rings. I have pretty much everything else planned for or picked out. I think that some have been surprised at how quickly we''ve been moving, but for the most part they accept it. And most vendors will encourage it.

Sometimes I get sad because I feel like I didn''t get to shop around, but that was because FI was certain that this particular vendor was ''the one''. FI does not like to shop around. So I started keeping a little diary of the wedding planning process. Because it did happen so fast it helps me remember how and why we were excited about that decision when we made it. So hopefully I don''t second guess myself too much later on.

And I second the advice to have a ''cohesive idea'' first. Things that I had planned on since um forever have changed now that actual decisions are being made.