an interesting development

[marcybelle]

Hi everyone! I posted on here for the first time last week, and ironically enough I posted a poll about ring shopping. Well, today my boyfriend and I went to the mall and he suggested that we go looking for rings. So we went to a few stores and I got to (YIKES!) try on a few different styles that I liked. I''m not sure what this means. At least I now know he is serious about looking. I picked a simple style, a channel setting with a round center stone. He got to see for the first time how much rings cost and stuff. However, we were at the mall, so I suggested that he talk to a couple of his friends and find out where they got their fiancee''s their rings because the mall probably isn''t the best place to get a good deal. But, now he knows what style I want. I have work tomorrow and of course I can''t sleep because of today. The suspense is going to kill me. A good thing is that he told me that he discussed our shopping excursion with his parents at dinner tonight and they are thrilled. His dad even gave him a list of jewelers to go talk to.

How do you deal with this phase? The not knowing at all was hard but at the same time I was complacent with the fact that we''d someday get engaged. Now I know its coming and so I''m going to have to make sure my nails and hair are always beautifully done, and now every time we go out together I''m going to think that "it''s time." I guess that it''s a good thing. It''s like waiting for Christmas morning to come. I hope he doesn''t keep me waiting TOO long.

 

[diamondfan]

Sometimes having more of a sense of things IS tougher, you feel like you are on red alert at all times, like a fireman waiting for the alarm to go off!

I lived through the same thing, and then it was, does he have it? is he PRETENDING TO HAVE it or pretending NOT to? Will he do it around people or when we are alone?? I made myself so spastic (which he enjoyed immensely the sick s.o.b.!!!) and I missed out on the moments of things because I was so worried...so it is best just to be pleased that things are moving along and try to have patience...you are a step closer! I know this is easier said than done, but try to find a healthy distraction if you can...and good luck, keep us informed !

 

[marcybelle]

Date: 6/12/2006 1:15:03 AM
Author: diamondfan
Sometimes having more of a sense of things IS tougher, you feel like you are on red alert at all times, like a fireman waiting for the alarm to go off!

I lived through the same thing, and then it was, does he have it? is he PRETENDING TO HAVE it or pretending NOT to? Will he do it around people or when we are alone?? I made myself so spastic (which he enjoyed immensely the sick s.o.b.!!!) and I missed out on the moments of things because I was so worried...so it is best just to be pleased that things are moving along and try to have patience...you are a step closer! I know this is easier said than done, but try to find a healthy distraction if you can...and good luck, keep us informed !

My boyfriend is sick as well. He takes enourmous pleasure in making me squirm when he says things like, "Well, maybe I''ll buy it and hold onto it for a year." I completely know what you mean by missing moments because you''re so concentrated on "Is that a box in his pocket?" or "Is he bending down?" We had a fabulous date the other night, so romantic, and rather than enjoying our time together, I kept thinking "I wonder if this is it?"

 

[diamondfan]

that is the bummer of the anticipation. My guy had the ring all along, and I had asked him "did you call my cousin yet" She is a jeweler and we had tentatively dicussed rings etc...and meanwhile, a lot of the Saturdays he told me he had to run to the office he was choosing the stone etc...he had me going but good, and I looked at every gesture and saw it as a sign...is his pocket bulging or is he acting a bit nervous etc...so I was constantly over analyzing...but, as I said, it did happen, and all he wanted was to have SOME element of surprise in the matter, since he felt he had none really!!! This is almost 16 years ago and I can still remember those feelings like yesterday I was soooo sure he was playing games but I had to just wait it out...he had the upper hand there, for sure. I am crossing my fingers for you that it goes well...

 

[ephemery1]

Marcy I feel your pain! After my FI and I first talked about rings, the first time I remember seriously wondering if he had one in his pocket was on vacation in St. John last June... and I didn''t actually get mine til THIS June! Every major event in between... my bday, random weekends at the beach, Thanksgiving, Christmas, HIS bday, V-day, our 3-year anniversary, Easter... I watched his every move, wondering.

All I can say is, rings take some time to save up for... my FI didn''t want to take any $$ out of his regular savings account, so waited til his "ring savings" acct was full... and with his crazy schedule, it still took him about 6 months of looking before he decided to let me help. Then, together, we found the right stone... and I only had to wait/wonder for about a month after that! Actually, the easiest period of waiting was after he told me the setting would take 10-14 days to be ready... so I absolutely *knew* it couldn''t happen for another couple weeks... but he surprised me 2 days later!!! (My hair and nails were definitely NOT done...)

If you are at all interested in helping your BF with the search, you might want to mention that to him at some point... it does give you more of a sense of control, and this forum can honestly help find you the very best diamond for your money. Otherwise, just try and enjoy the fact that you know it''s coming... but rings take time... between finding the stone, ordering the setting, and finally getting it all put together... it could still be 6 months from now! So PLEASE don''t have your hopes up so high that you start to get sad and resentful every time it DOESN''T happen... it can be really hard going through that.

And definitely keep posting on here!! Congrats on the ring-shopping trip.....