Any gay or lesbian lurkers (or posters) looking for engagement/wedding rings?

[glitterata]

If so, welcome!

I''d love to hear about what factors go into your experience and decision-making. Not just the 4 C''s, but things like who''s planning to wear a ring or rings--just one, or both of you? Who''s planning to propose, and how? What are your thoughts about how rings may or may not be associated with heterosexuality? And other questions that I''m sure I haven''t even thought of.

 

[AGBF]

What an interesting thought! "The New York Times" society pages now list homosexual unions if either a legal union between the couples is formalized or there is an actual wedding. (I *believe* that the policy is that there must be a component of the union's having been legally sealed.)

The first homosexual couple I saw in the "Times" were two beautiful, female doctors. I am sure that, for political reasons, the first people pictured (and written up) under the new policy were gorgeous, female, and of high social status!

I have to admit that although I am a feminist and a friend to many homosexuals, that the idea of homosexual marriage initially put me off. I had grown up seeing a bride in white marrying a groom, who was male. I am heterosexual and, to me, that seemed to be what *marriage* was. It wasn't unions between homosexuals that seemed not quite right, but the idea of marriage.

Now I think that I was simply being old-fashioned and set in my ways the way people my age tended to be when I was younger .

This probably belongs in the "society" forum, though. It is here just because I was struck by the thought of the rings. If two women had the same taste, or could agree on a set they both loved, they could have *matching* sets! Like the matching necklaces and bracelets designed for middle school girls who are best friends!

 

[glitterata]

In fact, AGBF, I started this thread because of the discussion in the "society" forum about the Massachussets decision regarding gay marriages. Check it out, it's pretty interesting.

 

[fire&ice]

Just my observation.

None of the commited gay couples I know have "diamond engagement rings". Many have exchanged like rings though - most of their own design. Some w/ stones of smaller accents - But - a good deal w/ mixing of metals - the most interesting of ones.

 

[AGBF]

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On 11/21/2003 12:15:28 PM glitterata wrote:

In fact, AGBF, I started this thread because of the discussion in the 'society' forum about the Massachussets decision regarding gay marriages. Check it out, it's pretty interesting.


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I went and did just that. I'm talking to you there .

Deb

 

[diamondlil]

Our neighbors are a commited gay couple, and they have have matching rings of their own design. The rings are bypass-style engagement-looking rings with about a 1 ct RB center stones. Very interesting design. I like that they match each other. I have never asked them if they had a union ceremony or exchanged the rings as a symbol of their commitment to each other.

 

[winyan]

I had some gay male friends who were 'handfasted'. They wore 'puzzle rings'.




Unfortunately, their union, (just like some heterosexual ones), did not withstand the test of time.




I'm still friends with them both.




win

 

[glitterata]

Lil, are your neighbors men or women?

I imagine that if a man wore a ring that looked like an engagment ring, people might assume he was gay; but if a woman did, they might assume she was straight and engaged to a man.

I know gay men who wear wedding-band-looking rings on their right ring fingers to make the point that they're taken without seeming to be straight. Now that de Beers is doing its right-hand-ring campaign, that strategy wouldn't work for lesbians.

 

[diamondlil]

Our neighbors are women. They wear their rings on their left hands as you would an ering/wedding ring. I'm sure when they moved here (we live in the country so to speak) they got a lot of people assuming they each had a husband. They are both active (professionals) in our area. In each of their professions, they meet and speak with a lot of people every day, and I believe they have been accepted and are highly regarded.

 

[fire&ice]

Yep, they all wear the rings on the correct hand & finger - the left. If you are committed to one another why wear them on the right hand? What's the point? To say hey I'm gay & by the way, I'm committed.