Anyone ever get nervous about getting married?

[june48]

Not really cold feet or doubting whether you can make a committment, but just the grandiousity of the promise you''re about to make and the fact that you''ll be spending every day of your life with your DF, who is 99% wonderful but, of course, has flaws like everyone else. Like will the fact that he tells dumb jokes bug me in 20 years? He is such an incredibly wonderful guy though, and I feel so blessed to have him.

 

[MissAva]

Maybe I will be closer to the actual date, but no not at the momment. I am not nervous about being married, but yes about getting married, I hate being the center of attention...as the bride I am not sure how to avoid it.

 

[curlygirl]

With 12 days to go before my wedding, I know exactly how you feel! I am not fearful about getting married, commitment, etc. But I am freaking out a little bit about the "everyday" stuff. Like right now, my fiance is away for 6 days and I have the place to myself and I LOVE IT! I just love being alone and doing what I want to do and not cooking, not cleaning up after someone else, spending hours on PS and the Knot and just having time to myself. It''s great. And then I started to worry because I shouldn''t feel that way because we live together and will be living together for the rest of our lives!!

But I think for me, it''s just because the stress of the actual wedding is getting to me and right now when we''re in the final stretch, I kind of need to be alone to obsess and do things without him there to make me feel like I''m crazy and obsessed!!! Yes, he leaves dishes in the sink, he leaves all the lights on, he procrastinates, he doesn''t close cabinets, he can''t make the bed the way I like it, he''s a little shy and insecure while I''m the total opposite, he talks while I''m watching my reality shows and there are times when he truly drives me crazy. But nobody is perfect. And when it comes down to it, he loves me more than anything in the world and I just love him to death. We balance each other out and work well together and want the same things out of life. Maybe because we''re in our 30s and more set in our ways that some things annoy us, but we are also mature enough to know that these are little things and what really matters is how we feel about each other and how important our relationship is.

Don''t sweat the small stuff. Trust in your love and commitment to each other. These are words I live by and hopefully will have a long and successful marriage.

 

[aljdewey]

June, this is totally natural and normal. In fact, there was quite a discussion about that same thing some time ago. I think this thread will help immensely.

https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/confessions-of-a-bride-to-be.26297/=

 

[selflove]

Yup, I just had that conversation with a single girlfriend last night: I''ll never have the butterflies in the stomach feeling about a new man in my life, ever again. Just one little aspect of getting hitched.

But I''m totally excited for those butterflies in the stomach feeling when I find out I''m pregnant (hopefully not too long after the wedding) and having the excitement that goes along with seeing my kids grow and raising a family with my husband.

And I''m stuck with his dumb jokes and all the other little things...but the warmth he puts in my heart is an easy trade-off.

 

[Tybee]

Oh June,

I do. I get so nervous, for so many reasons! I joke about being the wrinkly bride (I''m 37, will be 38 when we''re hitched.)
But I waited this long for several reasons, and maybe one of them was nerves.

I am with the most amazing guy. He is more than I ever wanted, and I truly love him more and more each day-- but I still get nervous.

The wedding day itself gives me the heeby jeebies too!

But there are also the times when I feel so completely happy and at peace. I feel in my bones that this is the most wonderful thing that I could do with my life. I miss him when he is away (which he is right now---but I too, am enjoying my unlimted ME time.)

Point being, it''s normal. Your taking a big step in your life. You''re taking it very seriously, and so you are nervous.

 

[flopkins]

Aljdewey- thanks for posting that old link, I remember that thread and now that I''m closer to the wedding it''s reassuring to read it again... !!

 

[AmberGretchen]

Hi - I think this has to be completely normal. I really liked Sumi''s post in the older thread - I feel like that captured it well - that every little thing takes on a bigger significance because now you are thinking in terms of "the rest of your life." I definitely didn''t feel any of this when I first got engaged, and in fact, its really just started recently for me as I pass the 6-months-''till-the-wedding mark (actually now closer to 5...). I think its actually in some ways really healthy because its important to recognize that it is a HUGE step you are taking in formalizing this commitment, and I think that people who don''t realize that or who don''t take it seriously are probably in for a rude awakening somewhere down the line. It is very stressful and scary, but I think the important thing is to just keep trying to keep things in perspective.

I''m dealing with the same thing so I don''t have any more input than that, but I hope its helpful.

 

[Tybee]

Aljdewey,
I am so glad that you posted that link! Now that my wedding is really coming around the corner, it''s nice to keep things in perspective.
Reading Sumi''s post again really is helpful!