Appropriate Wedding Gift

[thejadewoman]

I thought I''d post this here so that you brides and brides to be can hopefully chime in.

I just got an invitation for my cousin''s wedding in England. I won''t be able to travel there to attend, and am thinking of sending her a wedding gift. I''ve never met or spoken to her fiance before and know him only from photos.

I was thinking of getting her some pearls or maybe gemstone jewelry. But this gift is obviously for my cousin only and not for them as a couple. Bearing in mind they are British, would jewelry be appropriate as a gift ?

 

[mayachel]

While pearls are a lovely gesture, I would think that jewelry is much too personal a gift for someone you have never met, unless of course you have an established relationship via letters/phone etc...

Is there someone else in the family who could give you information about the couple''s tastes? Are they setting up a home? Crystal or silver candle sticks are always nice.

 

[meresal]

Do you know her well? If not, then I would steer clear of jewelry. It''s a very personal gift, IMO.

If you are sending a wedding gift, then it should be to the couple. If you know her well, then what about some jewelry for her, and a smaller gift for the couple and their home?

 

[lliang_chi]

I think the OP was saying that the bride was her cousin and the groom is the one she doesn''t know too well.

Jade, I gave a bride only wedding present, ladies Movado watch, to my college roommate. But she''s Indian, so it''s kind of culturally accepted to have wedding gifts for the bride. My mom said she wants my family to give me jewelry as a wedding present, so again it''s cultural. Otherwise, if they have a registry, you can get something off that.

 

[mayachel]

Oops! lliang_chi is correct. I did not read carefully. You DO have a relationship with your cousin

By all means, if you feel moved to give her something special, I don''t see any reason not to.

I know in the past this question has come up, about giving gifts to one person, or the couple. My personal thinking is that you should feel free to give to just her, and jewelry is one of those things, that I don''t think the fiance will take as a slight.

You could also include a generous note welcoming him to the family, how you have heard how much joy he brings to her life etc...

 

[tlh]

Date: 5/7/2009 11:21:08 AM
Author: mayachel
Oops! lliang_chi is correct. I did not read carefully. You DO have a relationship with your cousin

By all means, if you feel moved to give her something special, I don''t see any reason not to.

I know in the past this question has come up, about giving gifts to one person, or the couple. My personal thinking is that you should feel free to give to just her, and jewelry is one of those things, that I don''t think the fiance will take as a slight.

You could also include a generous note welcoming him to the family, how you have heard how much joy he brings to her life etc...

True... and how many men out there cannot wait to use the fine china?

Seriously a lot of the things on the registry may be for the "couple" but it is really the bride in most cases that wants those these.

 

[Pandora II]

Unless you know her extremely well, I would stay away from jewellery.

We don''t have showers over here and money isn''t the norm, so you would be playing safe buying from their registry plus no problems with her having to pay VAT (15%) and duty to get your gift out of Customs.

I''d check the registry - the most common place to register over here is at ''John Lewis'', but the list won''t go online until 6 weeks before the wedding date (just go to John Lewis Gift List and put in one of their surnames and/or wedding date and it will come up). They deliver everything in one go a few weeks/months (whenever suits you) after the wedding.