Couple questions related to save the dates

[laughwithme]

In October, we are having our engagement photos taken...shortly afterwards we will be ordering magnets to send out as save-the-dates. I am working on gathering addresses right now and have a couple questions...

1. Are there some people (due to generation, formality, etc.) that shouldn''t get save-the-dates? For example, my boss - we are inviting him, and I''m cool with him receiving a formal invitation, but is a more casual magnet still okay? What if the picture we choose for the magnet has FI planting a smooch on me...is that weird to send to a boss? Did any of you pick and choose who receives a STD although everyone received an invite?

2. Gathering addresses of co-workers...these actually ARE people I am fairly comfortable with, I just want to be aware of etiquette. Is it appropriate for me to ask co-workers/boss what their address is? That seems like a status question to me (in my city, its very obvious where the nicer homes are.) Or should I check the online white pages? That seems stalker-ish. What to do??!!

Thank you!

 

[charbie]

i think it is fine to send them to co-workers, they are going to see you kiss all night at the wedding!

one word of caution though when sending out save the dates- make sure they are people you would still want to invite if you no longer worked there. i had a great opportunity come up a few months before my wedding, so i changed jobs. LUCKY for me, i'm a procrastinator and had not sent out the STD's, so i didn't run into an issue of having invited people i no longer worked with and didn't communicate with.

i think it is totally fine "generationally" to send them to everyone. grandparents LOVE those sort of things. and the more notice they have, the better so they don't forget

ETA: i looked up my co-worker addresses on white pages. i still had a few i kept in contact with, and so i really wanted them there. but that was the easiest way for me to do it without an awkward conversation.

 

[MagsyMay]

I''m not sure from a formal "etiquette" point of view, but from my own experience, I think it is fine to ask coworkers or other people for addresses. I had gotten such requests for wedding invites, holiday/Christmas cards, baby showers, etc. If you can do some detective work on your own though, might as well!

I also think as long as your photo isn''t something inappropriate or that you''re not comfortable with a coworker seeing (perhaps like a picture in a bikini or something like that!), that sending it to coworkers/bosses/grandparents is totally acceptable. But I definitely think a cute smooching photo is entirely appropriate for a STD!

Like Charbie said, my only concern about coworkers would be that if you are not at your job come time for the wedding and would no longer wish for them to be invited, it could create a headache for you!

 

[andex23]

Depending on the size of your company, you might try asking HR. Explain that you are getting married, and sending out invitations and you''d like the addresses of these 6 people that all work in your department (or what relationship you have with them). And don''t feel obligated to send one to the HR person...that''s their job.

And I agree with everyone else...only send to the people that you''d like to have there if you aren''t still working there.