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destination weddings..info, ideas, experiences

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galleygal

galleygal

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Oct 27, 2007
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Hello, I was just wondering if anyone has any info or experiences on destination weddings? Where did you go? How was the experience? Approx. how much did it cost (I hope you don''t mind sharing)? I''m in the very very early stages of planning. I keep having thoughts against a tradional wedding. I want the experience to be more intimate with my F. I don''t like having the spotlight on me and I can''t seem to bring myself to spend so much money on one day. Does anyone else feel the same way? I would love to hear your suggestions, ideas, or experiences. Thanks!
 
We had a DW in San Francisco with about 30 people. It was fantastic, and we loved it, but it isn't for everyone. I guess for some it is a cost saver...but for us we had the same budget regardless, it just allowed us to spend our money on things that were more important to us rather than feeding/entertaining 100 of our parents' friends! If you scroll back in my past posts, I posted a few threads with pictures right after our 10/13 wedding.

Anyway, I really really loved how laid back it was and it was a TON of fun. But we had all our closest family and friends with us, so it wasn't like we eloped. But I think that eloping is a fab idea too IF and only IF you are truly ok with your family not sharing your moment with you.

Surfgirl eloped and had a beautiful wedding in the Orcas Islands, I know she doesn't regret it either! But unfortunately, as Surf and I BOTH learned, just because it's small doesn't necessarily mean you have to do fewer things! It's just as much as a PITA as planning a big wedding and sometimes more so because you aren't local.
 
I think I know how you feel. I can''t decide what I want but I know when I think of a full blown-out wedding at home, I think "hmm, not quite me". I think being center of attention isn''t my thing. Yet I''m afraid to actually commit to the plans. I have no problem committing to the FI, but the date and place is another story! Just as I get closer to it, something happens that freaks me out....like I am going with FI''s family to their cousin''s wedding 7 hours away and it''s been non-stop complaining about it from them. But they can turn around 5 min later, and say "WE should all go to Hawaii for your wedding!" as I''m thinking WE aren''t going anywhere with that much complaining. How''d this become so difficult? Have you narrowed it down anywhere? Jamaica is what I''m leaning toward now....
 
I was looking at Cancun b/c I''ve been there before and I loved the beach. I''m not too sure yet. I keep going back and forth b/t a tradional wedding and a destination wedding. We haven''t planned a date yet b/c I would like to finish my second degree...that won''t be for another 1-2 yrs. It''s just that, I''ve been going to a lot of weddings lately and I just feel like it''s such a wonderful day and I don''t want to worry about anything but "us." I want it to be personal and intimate. I don''t want to entertain everyone. Is it wrong to feel like that?
 
I don''t think its wrong to feel that. Its your day. You should be able to look back on it and feel happy and excited.... not miserable because you couldn''t relax.

I had quite a big wedding the first time round. I didn''t really enjoy it to be honest.... but that was for more personal reasons. My husband and I are planning a renewal of vows. We aren''t having a big celebration. There are going to be 6 of us there. My sister and her husband, my best friend and her husband, and us. Then we are off on a honeymoon (didn''t have one first time) to Jamaica for a week. I can''t wait!!

You should choose what will make you two happy. Its not about anyone else
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It''s definitely not wrong not to want to entertain everyone! I think, once you invite someone to be your guest, you have to take some basic care over their comfort, but you are absolutely not obliged to invite people! If a destination wedding with just the two of you, or with just your parents / best friends/ whatnot will make you feel happy and comfortable, then that is absolutely your prerogative. If some people get huffy about it, don''t worry too much. They are not ''entitled'' to be invited to your wedding and they will get over it.

Have fun! Find something / somewhere exciting! Maybe a place you always dreamed of visiting?

Just make sure you check into the legal requirements for marriage in the country you''re going to, as you don''t want to get a nasty surprise and discover you''re not actually married. And start early, since sometimes a lot of paperwork is involved. We will be legally married abroad, and it took us almot 2 months to sort the paperwork out!
 
I too have struggled with this decision, but like you I just know that the big wedding is not for me (or us)! We decided that we would go of on our own, probably Lake Como in Italy, and get married with the people there that matter, US! For people that have big weddings, and my sis was one of them, good for you, it just isn''t for everyone. In the end it really is about the bride and groom, not the 150 other people there for a good party...LOL! I did want to celebrate with friends and family though, so we decided to do a party either before or after the wedding. We ae still working on the date for the Italy trip and the party so there are many factors for all this, but there will def be a party, just not sure if it will be before or after. That way the stress of the actual wedding day is a little more stress free!

I hear great things about Jamaica! Stick with a well known resort and it will be perfect!
 
thanks for replying! Can you guys eloborate on your plans and how you guys are going about planning something elsewhere? I know that I can google it, which I''ve been doing but there are so many options out there and I want to know how you guys decided on what and where.
 
Hi galleygal,
I had a destination wedding in Key West, Florida almost two years ago now. I live in Chicago, and also wanted to get married quickly (heh, didn''t want to wait forever once I finally got engaged), so it was planned in a matter of 3 1/2 months. We had around 40 guests and it was absolutely the best decision to do a destination wedding in my opinion. We were in the same situation as neatfreak in that we weren''t doing it necessarily to cut costs (although that was a benefit) because we had the same budget regardless as well and we could spend our money on what we deemed important for us and our close friends and family rather than everybody and their dog back here where we live. Plus we were looking at getting married in February and February in Chicago is not necessarily pleasant!
It was definitely more intimate for us, laidback, elegant, and so much more us... As far as planning from afar, I was lucky. I somehow came upon a Key West destination wedding group on Yahoo. All the members were girls who just got married or were planning their wedding in Key West and most of them were not from the area. It was a place we could exchange ideas, vendor quotes, and suggested venues and vendors. I got many of my ideas about who to use down there from this group. I also realized that I am not one of those people who wanted to be totally embedded in the details, especially since it was hard to do from far away. So we ended up hiring a destination wedding coordinator that came highly recommended from the yahoo group. That was probably the single best decision that we made. It was extra $ obviously to have her, but she made everything so much easier and worry-free since we couldn''t just fly down to Key West anytime we wanted to check out a vendor, etc., so it was worth it. We trusted her opinion as someone who had great relationships with many of the vendors since she was local, and we weren''t disappointed.
What I would recommend is to narrow down where you might want to have a destination wedding and then start looking into the details of what it takes to get married there. We''re all here to help if you need some!
 
Hey Crooked, I was talking to a lady on a plane who's daughter married in Italy, and just to note that the paperwork to get married there was so ridiculously EXTENSIVE and the requirements so stringent that her daughter had a courthouse marriage in the US so that she was all legal and everything, and THEN had a destination religious wedding outside of Rome, so that she didn't have to worry about the icky picky brain munching reams of paperwork.

Galley I'm having a civil and a religious wedding in two different countries, neither of which I live in. My mom lives in one place and she basically is planning things there. For the other, I went there for a couple of weeks and just did a huge intensive planning push and got most of the big things done.

If that's not possible for you financially, you might think about using one of the services provided by hotels in popular destination wedding locations. Some hotels will do everything for you, and you just show up.

There's also a such thing as a destination wedding planner.

But basically, I'd say you probably either have to 1) go there yourself to get stuff done in advance 2) know someone who lives there who's willing to help you out or 3) hire help or use the services of a hotel.

As for how to pick where to go, well, here are some criteria I would use. I'd start by making a list of places, or types of places that you've always wanted to go. Then make a list of things you like to do. Of the places that you want to go, where you can do things you like to do (e.g., are you a hiker? or a beach lounger?), you can then ask yourself:

1) Is it easy to get to? (I.e., if you have to change planes six times, or it's a 26 hours flight away you may not want to cope with that)
2) Is it expensive?
3) How easy / complicated are the legal aspects going to be? (Call your embassy in the country in question to find this out... they are paid with your tax dollars and it's their job to help you with questions like that! Or to help you figure out who CAN help you.)

That should narrow it down to a few. From there, ask your FI!
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Also, many of us have traveled a lot. So, once you pick a few places, we can probably help you narrow it further.
 
I was a guest at a 20-odd person destination wedding in central america, and the wedding definitely cost less for the hosts than what would have happened in the US, mostly cause the guest count was much lower. As a guest, it was not much more expensive than a wedding weekend on the opposite coast in the US, which is what I would have had to spend if the wedding had been in one of the more traditional locals as I now live across the country from this friend. However, instead of a weekend in standard American town X, I got a tropical vacation!

But the bride''s primary motivation was to have a much smaller wedding than her mother wanted, and much less formal, and for this it worked beautifully. The extended family mostly declined to come as they were not used to traveling outside the US or didn''t want to spend the money. The downside was that many of the bride and groom''s friends couldn''t afford to come either, and the bride and groom did not have a lot of control over the little details. She had never actually gone to to the country prior to the wedding, so spend a lot of time on the phone with various resorts working out the details. I believe there was a significant snafu with her first venue and she had to entirely rebook the wedding 6 months out.

But her parents did a scouting trip for her, and she was OK relying on the guidance of the locals. And as with most things in the wedding industry, less expensive doesn''t mean cheap. They regularly charged American prices in the tourist area, and you lack the ability to interview vendors in person or comparison shop from the States. As she wanted her American guests to feel comfortable, she went with an expensive tourist region of an English-speaking country, so prices were lower than the US on some things (but not all - groceries were ridiculous!) and far, far above what you could get if you were anywhere else in the country.

If you wanted a slightly easier experience, I think the package weddings available in the Caribbean offer some of the nicest, easiest ways to have a destination wedding. But Americans also might be less intimidated by the Caribbean, so you have to know your guests before assuming it would be smaller and less expensive. My friend just went to an 80-person destination wedding in the Caribbean, so some people clearly have the means and motivation to travel!
 
Date: 11/25/2007 12:07:44 PM
Author: Independent Gal
Hey Crooked, I was talking to a lady on a plane who''s daughter married in Italy, and just to note that the paperwork to get married there was so ridiculously EXTENSIVE and the requirements so stringent that her daughter had a courthouse marriage in the US so that she was all legal and everything, and THEN had a destination religious wedding outside of Rome, so that she didn''t have to worry about the icky picky brain munching reams of paperwork.
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Thanks for the info Indy! In doing some research I have noticed that they are very strict on their marriage rules. I think what I might have to do is just have the "wedding" there, and that will be where we think of for our wedding spot, but then come back and make it legal! I have looked into wedding planners over there and if I go that route it might be a little easier. Thanks for the 411!
 
The main thing for me is that I would love to be married on a beach and have nice weather. I went to Cancun and loved the weather and feeling of it. I don''t want to be stressed and I would rather that the wedding be small. If I have a tradional wedding in my hometown, I could try to keep the list down...but I have a huge extended family and there is no way I could keep the guestlist down. I also have a lot of friends from college, high school, and just moving around. After all is said and done, I couldn''t have a small wedding and I would prefer one. I think a destination wedding is a good idea b/c I love the weather and feeling of "paradise." It''s also a nice way to invite people, but not have everyone attend. Does anyone have more ideas or experiences or just your 2 cents? Thanks!
 
hi galleygal - i''m planning a destination wedding in the florida keys in march. i wanted something a little nontraditional, but i knew i have lots of family and friends who would "have" to be invited, so i didn''t want to make it super expensive or hard to get to. this way people can fly into miami. another consideration for me: my family and friends are pretty far-flung, so anyplace i picked would have been a "destination" for the majority of the guests. anyway, my original intention was to have around 75 people, but it has crept higher... now we''re planning for about 90-100. i''m still happy i went this route, but it''s certainly not turning out much cheaper. that''s partially because i''m having a friday night dinner and sunday brunch for everyone who''s invited. so make sure you factor in things like that, if you''re going to have them.

also - don''t count on people not to attend. so far, i''ve been shocked as i''ve heard back from people - so many people, from my 80-year-old great uncle to my pregnant friend from college who lives on the other side of the country - are saying they''re coming. people like warm-weather winter vacations!

anyway - just let me know if you have any other specific questions.
 
AceP, more details please! How did you invite everyone? Where are you having your wedding? Are you inviting everyone to the Friday night dinner?
 
We eloped and had an amazing wedding. I have absolutely no regrets. We didn''t want a traditional wedding for a number of reasons similar to yours. I didn''t like the idea of being the center of attention. I didn''t want to have to invite all of the people who I would be expected to invite. We really didn''t want to spend so much $ on one day, we were saving for a house. And the two of us had been together for 15 years. Somehow a traditional big wedding didn''t feel appropriate. We wanted it to be something for the two of us.

Just because you elope or have a very small event doesn''t mean you can''t have a "Wedding" - a lot of people picture elopements as spur of the moment things in Vegas. Surfgirl''s wedding is well documented on here as an example of a "wedding for two". She planned everything just the same as if she were having guests. I took a similar approach, but did a little bit less myself.

I booked a package at a favorite resort which included our hotel room, the officiant, a meal and cake. The next day we went and bought my wedding ring. After that I knew the vital details were taken care of, and I was able to enjoy planning the finer details. I agonised over jewellry and shoes the same as any bride. I shopped for my dress and got a deal on ebay! DH was able to pick out comfortable beach wedding attire - which made him very happy!

Some things were quite out of my control because we were at a distance. I sent photos for inspiration to the local florist, but didn''t know what the bouquet would actually look like until that day. As it was part of the package, I had no idea what the cake would be like until I bit into it! Both the flowers and cake were perfect. I did know what the meal and room would be like, as we had stayed at the same resort in the past. We were welcome to write our own vows and met with the officiant the day before the ceremony to make sure everything was on track.

When we got home I created and sent out wedding announcements which I sent to anyone who would have been invited if we had a huge wedding. This was my chance to do something along the lines of a DIY invitation.

We had the best few days. In part I owe this to the spectacular oceanfront location (Tofino, BC, Canada), and to the fact that since it was just the two of us, there was so little stress the day of the wedding.

I would suggest going somewhere you have been before. Somewhere you know is a perfect location. I would have stressed about an unknown venue and hotel.
 
Uhm, I''m not even engaged yet, but we have discussed getting married in another country, maybe having a traditional Buddhist ceremony in Thailand. Here is one Thailand wedding site: http://www.thailand-wedding.com/index.html . Neither of us are affiliated with any particular church, and we both have very, very small families. I was even thinking of going to Turkey -- very ethereal setting at Cappodocia:

http://www.goreme.com/wedding-in-turkey.php

I realize this is not what you are looking for, but the options really are limitless, aren''t they.

Oh, one more thing: I saw a travel special on Eastern Europe. I believe they were in Estonia, where they had this sort of night long nature festival, in the spring time. Everyone was wearing these beautiful flower wreaths. That is where I would probably most like to get married, but how does one go about setting up a wedding in Estonia?? I am sure I don''t know, but, uhh, I should probably wait til I''m engaged first, huh.
 
Date: 11/26/2007 12:56:34 PM
Author: galleygal
AceP, more details please! How did you invite everyone? Where are you having your wedding? Are you inviting everyone to the Friday night dinner?
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Hi Galleygal - no problem. We sent out save-the-dates in Sept. (wedding is in March). We also set up a pretty thorough Web site, which i know has helped quite a bit as people have booked travel and made plans. The wedding is at a small private resort in Islamorada, which is about 60 miles from Miami. We''re renting out the whole place for the weekend. It''s not the most convenient, but is more so than Key West, which is about 200 miles from Miami (or is expensive/difficult to fly to directly). From a planning perspective, The Keys are a pretty expensive destination - more so than i initially realized. That''s partially, I''m learning, because they have a pretty captive audience. Some Miami vendors will come down (e.g. our ceremony musicians are from Miami), but they''ll generally charge travel fees.

Yes, everyone is invited to the Friday night dinner. As well as Sunday brunch. We''re probably also going to have snacks around the pool Saturday afternoon. I wouldn''t expect everyone to travel that far and not keep them fed! Altogether, we''re anitipating spending about $45,000 (though i''m crossing my fingers for less) - the biggest chunk on catering costs for the weekend. That does not include rings or honeymoon.

Any other questions, fire away!
 
Date: 11/26/2007 3:02:15 PM
Author: AceP

Date: 11/26/2007 12:56:34 PM
Author: galleygal
AceP, more details please! How did you invite everyone? Where are you having your wedding? Are you inviting everyone to the Friday night dinner?
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Hi Galleygal - no problem. We sent out save-the-dates in Sept. (wedding is in March). We also set up a pretty thorough Web site, which i know has helped quite a bit as people have booked travel and made plans. The wedding is at a small private resort in Islamorada, which is about 60 miles from Miami. We''re renting out the whole place for the weekend. It''s not the most convenient, but is more so than Key West, which is about 200 miles from Miami (or is expensive/difficult to fly to directly). From a planning perspective, The Keys are a pretty expensive destination - more so than i initially realized. That''s partially, I''m learning, because they have a pretty captive audience. Some Miami vendors will come down (e.g. our ceremony musicians are from Miami), but they''ll generally charge travel fees.

Yes, everyone is invited to the Friday night dinner. As well as Sunday brunch. We''re probably also going to have snacks around the pool Saturday afternoon. I wouldn''t expect everyone to travel that far and not keep them fed! Altogether, we''re anitipating spending about $45,000 (though i''m crossing my fingers for less) - the biggest chunk on catering costs for the weekend. That does not include rings or honeymoon.

Any other questions, fire away!
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AceP, any chance you''re getting married at Casa Morada? Only curious as we looked into getting married there (looks stunning), but ultimately it was above our budget so we moved it on down to Key West... which I agree is a bit of a challenge for guests to get there, but it worked out for everyone in the end.
 
hi jfo - nope, Casa Morada was too small for our group. We''re at The Caribbean Resort at Sea Isle. It''s a tucked-away little place that I didn''t know about until I spoke with a caterer. Sometimes I wish we''d gone with Key West, which has far more full-service options, but with 100 people, we just couldn''t expect them all to travel that far. Forty people must have a been a little less of a headache!
 
Date: 11/26/2007 5:09:43 PM
Author: AceP
hi jfo - nope, Casa Morada was too small for our group. We''re at The Caribbean Resort at Sea Isle. It''s a tucked-away little place that I didn''t know about until I spoke with a caterer. Sometimes I wish we''d gone with Key West, which has far more full-service options, but with 100 people, we just couldn''t expect them all to travel that far. Forty people must have a been a little less of a headache!
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AceP, thanks for your reply. I haven''t heard of The Caribbean Resort at Sea Isle before, but it looks fantastic! Your wedding is going to be gorgeous, I''m sure. Islamorada is really beautiful, and it''s wonderful that you''ll have all your guests with you for the whole weekend. I completely hear you on expectations for having that many guests travel so far. We were fortunate that out of the 40, only 2 of the guests had significant travel delays (due to weather) and missed the ceremony entirely. And we did invite many more people than who actually accepted and came, but I guess we anticipated that too. By the way, isn''t it so true about the Keys being a pretty expensive destination? Ah well... still worth it in the end
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I live in the Caribbean but chose to have a destination wedding a few islands away, in Barbados. We wanted something small, fairly untraditional, and private. If we had had at home we would''ve had to invite LOTS of family/friends, which would''ve tripled our budget (and we wanted to pay for it ourselves)- plus we would''ve lost the privacy we wanted. I''m from a small place so everybody knows when everybody is getting married. We also hate being the center of attention!

So Barbados worked out well... I basically communicated a lot via email with the wedding coordinator. It''s important that you find a coordinator who is available, communicative, and reliable. It helps to ease a lot of the stress of planning a wedding away from home. (I switched hotels after I realized that the wedding coordinator at the first hotel took two weeks to answer every email). You have to put a lot of trust in what the coordinator says about the cake, flowers etc. I had no idea what my flowers or cake would look like before I showed up for the wedding! If you''re comfortable with not having control over all aspects of a wedding then a destination wedding may be right for you. I found it liberating...! We didn''t want anything fussy so it was fine for me to let the coordinator take care of most of the finer details.

The down side of a destination wedding is that maybe some close family/friends might not be able to make it. This happened to us - so it was a little sad in that respect. But I think we also didn''t give enough notice for people to plan properly. If you give plenty of notice then the persons closest to you will probably make a greater effort to be there. Destination weddings can also be a huge inconvenience for guests - in terms of cost, travel time, leave from work etc. - so that has to be taken into account.

Other than that, I think destination weddings are great if you want something more intimate, relaxed, and fun!
 
Sha-since you live in the Caribbeans, do you suggest any particular island? Do you have any pics that you would care to post? Do you suggest any resort? Thanks!
 
Date: 11/27/2007 12:34:25 AM
Author: galleygal
Sha-since you live in the Caribbeans, do you suggest any particular island? Do you have any pics that you would care to post? Do you suggest any resort? Thanks!
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Sha--also, do you know of any excellent photographers there and resorts that would have a wedding package but still let you choose a "decent" photographer? That''s my destination fear.

(Sorry for butting in galleygal! I think we''re in the same boat, so I''ve been glued to your post!)
 
Winston...it''s o.k. I''m also from WI. I see we do think alike.
 
Hi,

There are sooo many islands to choose from in the Caribbean - I guess it depends on your vacation style. If you like nice beaches, I would suggest Anguilla, Antigua, Barbados, the B.V.I (British Virgin Islands - Tortola, St. John) or the U.S.V.I (US Virgin Islands - St. Thomas, etc.), also I hear Aruba has nice beaches as well. Most of the other islands have fairly good beaches too as well as lush, mountainous terrain - St. Lucia, St. Kitts-Nevis, and Grenada, to name a few. .St. Lucia is a favourite for couples - with quite a few romantic hotels nestled into the mountains, as well as hotels on the beach. St. Maarten is a good choice as well - nice beaches as well as good nightlife and lots of shopping. A little bit crowded for my taste, though. Dominica is probably the 'lushest' island and great for hikers and nature lovers - it's not a 'beach'island though. The Cayman Islands and Bahamas are probably good options too - but I don't know much about those.

As far as hotels, I can't recommend any particular one, unfortunately. I've been to most of these islands but stayed in more 'budget' accommodation or with friends. An Internet search would probably be best. If you search for the Tourism Authority Website for the particular island you're interested in (e.g Barbados Tourism Authority) - it should allow you to search for different types of accommodation (hotels on the beach, close to nightlife. etc.)

Keep in mind as well that you don't have to get married at a hotel, though. We had planned to do that at first but didn't get the particular 'feel' that we wanted - so we got married at a Historic House and Gardens, for just a little over the hotel price. Most hotels will require that you get married on their property butthere are also wedding planners that can arrange for you to get married whereever you choose. Many of the islands offer Secluded Beaches, Botanical Gardens, Historic locations, Rainforests etc. as alternative wedding locations. Then you can choose whatever hotel you'd like to stay at, without needing it to be a perfect wedding venue as well.

Be sure to check out the marriage regulations for your country of choice as well. That was a major factor in deciding where to hold our wedding. Our first choice was Dominica but you have to be on island for two days before applying for a marriage licence, then you had to wait another two days to actually get the licence. We were only vacationing for 5 days for that would've taken up most of our time. In Barbados you can apply for and receive the licence on the same day and get married right after. But most places have some kind of residency requirement before you can get married there - be sure to check that out first. The info should be online.

For photographers - yes, most of the hotels would have a particular photographer that they work with for a particular price, but some would allow you to choose your own if you prefer. Our wedding venue offered to book their photographer for us, which was expensive- but we looked around and got a better deal elsewhere. Most of the professional photographers were on the Internet so we just contacted them ourselves. They also had websites where we could check the quality of their work. If the hotel has "photography" included as part of total wedding package cost, you might have to negotiate with them to remove/add any costs for booking your own person. We were very pleased with our photographer - And we got our photos and Cd the day after the wedding too!
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(I would post a photo except I don't want anyone to recognize me on the Internet....as I said, I live in a VERY small place...)
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Anyway, I hope the above info helped. The Caribbean is great for weddings. It seems like you're looking for a 'paradise' feel and you'll definitely get that here!
 
Date: 11/24/2007 8:02:43 AM
Author: CrookedRock
I too have struggled with this decision, but like you I just know that the big wedding is not for me (or us)! We decided that we would go of on our own, probably Lake Como in Italy, and get married with the people there that matter, US! For people that have big weddings, and my sis was one of them, good for you, it just isn''t for everyone. In the end it really is about the bride and groom, not the 150 other people there for a good party...LOL! I did want to celebrate with friends and family though, so we decided to do a party either before or after the wedding. We ae still working on the date for the Italy trip and the party so there are many factors for all this, but there will def be a party, just not sure if it will be before or after. That way the stress of the actual wedding day is a little more stress free!

I hear great things about Jamaica! Stick with a well known resort and it will be perfect!
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I lived in Como for 2 years and it is so beautiful!

I took FI there last year and he liked it best of everywhere I have taken him over there. I want to retire there!

If you need any help at all, I''m happy to do what I can.

One of the great things about Como is that it is very cosmopolitan and most people speak English.

One of my friends got married in Siena last year, so it is possible to do it - you just need loads of documents. However, the church ceremony is not legal, so unless you want a civil ceremony you will need to do it in the US first/after.

I''m also not sure that Como''s townhall is particularly scenic - one of the other towns along the lake would be better.

If you have a sizeable budget and small numbers of people - Villa D''Este is the place to go! Otherwise I went to several weddings at Villa d''Olmo which is on the lake front and beautiful - though you do tend to get a number of other brides turning up to take pics in high season.

June/July is incredibly hot and humid, May it rains a LOT. August is terrible in Italy as everyone gets a month''s holiday and all the businesses/restaurants etc shut. September, early October or end of May (amazing flowers) are the best.
 
We got married a year ago in Rome. While I didn''t use this company for the wedding, I learned a great deal from their website about requirements and options for ceremony location.
http://www.italian-weddings.com/marriage_requirements_italy/requirements_for_usa.html

We invited a very small group (as our guests--we paid air fare & hotel) and even though we had our wedding in a very special location, our cost was $5,000 for ceremony, makeup & hair, flowers, bouquet, tuxedo, photographer, limo & wedding dinner & most of the cost was the dinner.

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Every one of the earlier posts offers a wealth of information so I have nothing major to add. Except to say that if you really want a DW then don''t be afraid to go for it. We had a DW and it was the best decision I/we have made in a while other than agreeing to marry each other. Every time I look at the pictures, I find myself more and more convinced that we made the right decision to get married "away." While it was the case that some of our close family members and friends couldn''t make it, we were still surprised about how many folks did make the trip. So all around, for us it was a wonderful experience! Good luck in your planning. I am excited to hear what you decide!!!
 
ONedrop...where did you get married?
 
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