Did you get your fiance''s opinion dresses?

[ScorpioNYC]

Just wondering...i''ve been trying to get my fiance''s approval and have showed him the photos I posted here- he''s no help, men just don''t understand fashion! Sorry - just needed to rant. Our wedding is just us + immediate family (originally it was just the two of us), so it''s really important that he likes what I wear. Did anyone else try to get a male opinion on their dress? Or is it better to ignore his preferences all together?

 

[violet3]

I did. I wish i hadn''t. I love lacy dresses and i thought that''s what i''d end up with, and the only thing he said, when i kept showing him pictures of stuff in bridal mags was "NO beaded lace, it''s weird." Ummmmm....huh?

Anywhoo, i''ve posted this before, but i think that was about when i stopped asking him his opinion

I figure (as my sister pointed out) he''s not going to remember much about it except that it was strapless and white. But, i will tell you, even though i knew it was silly, i stayed away from most of the lace dresses after that just because....

 

[CDNinNYC]

While he has a great sense of taste for himself and on men''s fashion, I''ve learned not to ask my FI for any opinions on clothes for me. He says he can''t visualize how things will look on me. There have been plenty of times where he didn''t like an item on the model/advertisement but changed his mind when I wore it.

I never even thought of asking his opinion/approval on what type of dress I got.

 

[mrscushion]

I showed him a page in the latest Martha Stewart or some other bridal magazine that showcased different dress styles and asked him to choose his fave. He picked the same one I did (a Melissa Sweet lace gown)! Yay for matching tastes!

 

[Gypsy]

My poor husband. I dragged him to bridal shops across 3 states. LOL. But he didn''t see THE DRESS until my wedding day. It was great to see his opinions on the hundreds he did see though. Because he thought my first choice looked like a priest''s vestiments and he REALLY didn''t like it. I was dressing up for HIM and wanted HIS opinion. After the first 100 or so dresses though, I had his taste down and it meshed with mine so it all worked out.

 

[jstarfireb]

I did and I definitely regret it. I ended up exchanging my perfect dress for one that was more expensive and not as much my style based on his preferences, then spent lots of money on alterations to make it look more like the original dress. At the time I thought that he should have a say because it''s his day too. Now I realize that most men (well, that is most straight men) don''t understand women''s clothing at all!

 

[sugarjo]

i showed FI a picture of a dress that i almost bought because THE DRESS was out of my budget.... and he hated it...
i ending up with THE DRESS because the salon carrying it (only one in state) closed their bridal dept and i got the sample for half off..
woo hoo.

 

[bee*]

I put together a few pictures and asked him which one he loved most and he picked the dress I bought. He doesn''t know that but it definitely put my mind at ease.

 

[sba771]

I showed FI a ton of pictures before I went shopping. There was only 1 he thought was kind of ugly...turns out that is the one I got! I have learned he doesn''t know what he is talking about. I bought a stunning Nicole Miller, showed him it on the hanger and his face screamed OMG that is so ugly. I put it on and his face said- wow that is hot. I am hoping for the same thing on our wedding day.

 

[iheartscience]

Date: 4/27/2009 10:30:58 PM
Author: CDNinNYC

I never even thought of asking his opinion/approval on what type of dress I got.

Ditto!

 

[White Orchid]

My husband had nothing to do with the wedding dress. That was my big surprise for him!

 

[elrohwen]

My FI actually went dress shopping with me and will go with me for alterations. My family lives far away as do most of my female friends, so it just made sense to bring him. He was honest about how things looked on me, but not so opinionated that he got in the way of me picking what I wanted. It worked for us! Though we had to laugh because the men''s bathroom at POB in NYC looks more like a storage closet than a bathroom. Lol I guess they don''t get too many male visitors.

 

[Inanna]

Yes, I have gotten opinions from FI and we will likely go dress shopping together (although I do already have a dress, I'm not sure if its "The Dress"). It's actually been fun so far. I discovered that FI has excellent taste in women's fashion. He has flat out said that my dress MUST be silk (no synthetic fabric) and the cut and design should speak for itself, meaning he doesn't really like adornments, applique, beading, lace, etc., which I agree with. I also enlisted the help of FI's younger brother, who has the opposite taste of FI - loves poufy dresses, beads, lace. Its certainly been interesting getting these opinions, but the decision is still up to me.

 

[rhbgirl24]

I''ve had the dress style picked out for YEARS.... so he saw that picture and whole heartedly approved. He hasn''t, and won''t, see me IN the dress until day of, but I told him he could come to the shopping and whatnot if he wanted.
But we have pretty much the same tastes, so i wasn''t worried about it. He came to the first fitting, helped me look over the dress to make sure all the beading and stuff was good, but didn''t stick around when I put it on.

 

[meresal]

None at all... the last thing I need is to be worrying about, is whether or not FI will like the dress I fell in love with.

 

[Kelli]

OMG! My fiance--- who doesn''t give a flying um... HOOT... what I wear on a regular basis, got SOOOO opinionated as to what a wedding dress should look like. Halter tops are nice, but NOT for a wedding dress, NO tube tops whatsoever (apparently any strapless dress is a tube top

), poufy is ok but ONLY if it''s smooth, nothing that looks like curtains, which I found out means anything with beading or embroidery on the bottom half, nothing blingy or sparkly, the list goes on and on. WHAT A WEIRDO FREAK!! I actually found a dress in magazine that actually fit into all those descriptions and you know what he had the nerve to say??
"It''s pretty but it just doesn''t look like a wedding dress." Well DUH!!

So anyway I went shopping for a particular dress that he said he liked, even though it has a little bling. I actually loved the dress too, but they didn''t have it. I almost regret not looking harder for it, but I happened to find a dress that I, my mother, my sister (who is the MOH), and one of my other BMs thought was perfect. It would not have been my fiance''s choice, but when I called and told him about it he said "Get it, I''m sure it looks great." So I did.

I still wonder about that other dress from time to time, but I don''t think it would have fit me as perfectly. The one I picked feels like it was made for me!

 

[LadyBlue]

I did not, I think the dress should be our dream dress. If you love it, you will look beautiful and he will love it as well.

 

[sammyj]

Nope...to be honest, he has weird taste in clothes...especially women''s fashion. I''m pretty sure I would have scoffed at every dress he''d pick out for me to try on if he had come with me to try on dresses! I have no doubt that he''ll love my dress though - mainly because I love it so much.

I do make him watch ''Say Yes to the Dress'' with me and I always hope that my dress will be shown on the show, or at least something similar, so I can get his reaction.

 

[Pandora II]

Yes - we designed mine together, but the original idea was his. He also helped pick the fabrics and made me choose braver options than I might have done alone. He had zero interest in looking at dresses in magazines or shops - although we did go to a bridal fashion show of high-end designers, which he got lots of ideas from. I actually never set foot in a bridal shop or tried on any other dresses at all.

He didn''t see the finished dress until the actual day - and he loved it. I wouldn''t have had nearly so much fun - or ended up with the dress I did - without his input.

My brother has also helped chose his FI''s dress.

 

[Elmorton]

Yupp. I showed him a bunch of tea length dresses and said that''s what I want. He likes my legs

so he liked the idea quite a bit.

Then when I actually bought my dress and it was time to alter it to cut off the train/length, I balked. I said it was soooo pretty how it was! DH said "Nope, you''re wearing a tea-length dress" and that''s all there was to that (and I''m still very glad he intervened).

Other stuff/options - neckline, bows etc - I really didn''t bother asking, because I figured it would go nowhere - he''d be "guessing for the right answer" instead of giving me an opinion.

 

[tropiqalkiwi]

I talked with my FI before I went looking for dresses about what he likes and dislikes on me. The big thing that I would never have guessed about is that he has a strong negative reaction to asymmetry! So I definitely did stay away from dresses that had clear one direction diagonal lines to them.

If you are wanting to include your guy in the process, I would only do so as much as you are comfortable doing when you normally shop. If he is great at picking stuff out for you and you like his taste, then go for it and get his help picking out the dress. If you wouldn''t trust him to pick out your clothes normally then I would stay away from asking them about specifics such as lace, beading, or neckline. If they are set on such specifics try to get them to be more general, like if they say no beading, do they really mean that they want you to look comfortable and romantic instead of so dolled up and decorated that they don''t recognize you? Try to find out what is behind their thinking so you can confidently pick a dress you like, but you think he will like you in too.

 

[musey]

I did... but I went into shopping with his loves in the back of my mind (ie. he loves antiquey styles as I do, and grecian influences, so I tried on a lot of dresses in that vein). So everything I showed him after trying stuff on he liked anyway.

In the end my opinion is that he will always love whatever you choose, because it''s what you''ll feel the most beautiful in.

 

[Hudson_Hawk]

I asked him for a general idea of what he might like, but I didn't take it too seriously as the dress is really all about me. What's under the dress is all about him. I made an effort to try on dresses in the style he liked, but nothing 'spoke' to me like the dress I ended up with...

 

[Izzy03]

My hubby is BEST shopping partner and has very good fashion taste, I love shopping with him. Well, I had dress drama because my mom (and all her friends) hated the only dress I really fell for and I never had the "THIS IS THE ONE" moment for my dress. I ended up being very torn about what to do.

So I showed my hubby pictures of a few dresses I was considering PLUS the one I was leaning towards because at that point I really needed his help. But he only saw pictures of models wearing the dresses. I ended up going with the one my mom hated, and by the day of the wedding she admitted to falling in love with it too. After deciding on the gown I didn''t let my hubby see any more pictures of the dress, and the wedding day was the first day he saw the dress on me. He said that by the time the wedding came around (6 months later) he didn''t remember what the dress looked like anyway.

 

[EmptyLeftHand]

I have been having major thoughts recently - slightly increased by actually seeing the dress and trying it on.

The lady in the shop took a few photos when I had the dress on and I showed them to FI last night as I was a bit emotional about the whole thing. He said he didn''t care about all the secrecy stuff anyway. And was sensible enough to say that he really liked the dress and did his best to allay my fears.

I think that if a man is given a fairly clear warning about what is expected (eg reassurance in my case) he might be pretty good at responding. However, if you just know that your FI is not going to tell you what you need to hear, then probably don''t mention it!

 

[luvthemstrawberries]

I actually asked FI by showing him a lot of pictures before I shopped any. He was in the mindset of hating strapless, period. And I was ok with shopping for something with straps. But when I went shopping with my mom, we grabbed some with straps, and a few people convinced me to try on a few beautiful strapless dresses. I came home and showed FI the photos of me. He said I actually looked good in a strapless, and didn''t mind it at all!! Haha. So I went back the next day and only basically only tried on strapless dresses.

And ended up with one.

He''s seen the pictures of me in the final 3, but I didn''t tell him which one was purchased. He thinks he knows everything, haha, and has declared that I picked out a certain one and thinks he''s got it nailed. Little does he know, he picked the wrong one, haha. And he doesn''t want to see me till the day of (will probably do pictures together before the ceremony) - so he''s gonna be surprised!!

Crazy man.

 

[Kelli]

My fiance said no strapless too, but I picked out some sparkly spaghetti straps and am going to attach them, since he says he loves the way I look in spaghetti straps. I don''t see what the difference is really, but whatever

I''m more comfy in straps. I think it''s so weird the things they get opinionated about.