Does he have the ring?

[designchica]

My boyfriend and I have been together a year and a half. I''m 31, he''s 27. We are great together and and truly are in love. We''ve discussed marriage and I''ve made it clear that it is very important to me to get married and start a family. In September he made it clear to me that he isn''t ready and that even though he loves me, he isn''t sure that I am "the one"to be with FOREVER. It really hurt to hear that because we love each other and have a great relationship aside from the fact that we are at different points in our life (him being a little younger than me) and kids and marraige are a few years further out for him than it is for me. I was ready to break up with him on the spot when he said he isn''t sure if I am "the one" but he convinced me to give the relationship more time before walking away. Since that conversation, our love for each other has grown triplefold and things have been wonderful between us and its almost like we''ve fallen deeper in love every week that passes.

The other night we both had a little too much to drink at a Christmas party and I brought up the marriage thing again ( I should have known better than to drink that last glass of wine!) I went on this long rambling teary-eyed speach about how difficult it is for me to continue on in this relationship when he has communicated to me that he isn''t even sure he wants a future with me. I told him that I am very confused as to how someone could love me so much (and I do believe that he does) yet still not know if I am "the one".

At the end of everything I said, he made a comment along the lines of, "You sure would be putting your foot in your mouth if you found out that I already have the ring, woudln''t you?" I was pretty shocked and thrown off by this statement. We have a trip coming up to Hawaii in three weeks that he sprung on me out of the blue last week. My first thought when he told me about the trip was that he might be proposing, but then I stopped myself from getting my hopes up but then with his comment last night...I''m wondering if perhaps he does have the ring????? I dont'' want to set myself up for disappointment, but girls...I''m strarting to think maybe it is happening sooner than I thought possible!

 

[CrookedRock]

Sounds like he may have woken up and realized you are the one! I understand how you felt when he told you he wasn't sure about you being the one. That pretty much happened to me too, and I explained to him (also after too much wine

) That his saying that to me was like him proposing and me saying no, How would he feel? That kinda put thngs into perspective for him. It's almost as if they don't really think about marriage unless we bring it up, so strange, but I guess that's why we call it "boy time". LOL
I had another friend get engaged over Christmas, and he said to me in front of my best friend "you're next". So I know we are close. My jeweler happens to be all the way across the country in Vegas, so I know he is flying there in the beginning of January, So he doesn't have the ring yet, but Soon!! Sounds like your guy has it though. Try to focus on having an amazing trip with him, and if it happens it will be a surprise! Wouldn't hurt to get a manicure before u go though! LOL

Good Luck, Crossing my fingers for ya!

 

[sunnyd]

hmmm...sounds promising. not to get your hopes up for nothing, but he planned a trip to hawaii, then made that comment after having a bit to drink. having said that, i wouldn''t go crazy thinking that this is "it". that''ll set you up for big disappointment if it isn''t. a trip to hawaii will be great, engagement or not! if possible, i wouldn''t bring up the subject again until after the trip, then maybe have a (sober) heart to heart chat about it.

i don''t know if i helped, but let us know what happens!

 

[designchica]

Thanks, Ladies! I appreciate the feedback!

I forgot to add that latey he has been saying thing like "our wedding'''' and "when we get married"...Its looking good!!

 

[Harleigh]

I hope your trip to Hawaii is everything you hope it will be, but try not to let it rule your life for the next few weeks. Please let us know how it turns out!

 

[designchica]

I''m embarrassed to admit this, but I went snoopin'' in the hopes of finding a ring.

I did not find one. However, I did find a poem which he has started writing that is along the lines of, "You''re the one for me...it could not feel more right...come share your dreams with me..." etc. etc. and in the end it says something along the lines of "with all my heart I''m hoping you will say yes".

So, that gives me A LOT of hope and also made me want to stop snooping, because the more real it gets, the more I dont'' want to ruin any part of it.

 

[MissErin]

Oooooooh!! How romantic. I''m glad this helped you feel a little bit better. Now...

NO MORE SNOOPING!!

hehe You need to be somewhat surprised - you owe him that girlie!! hehe

 

[gwendolyn]

Nope, he doesn''t have the ring, and I''m fine with that--we aren''t quite ready to be engaged, and when we are, we''re going to pick out a ring together.

 

[Deelight]

I agree stop snooping

It looks probable that he may have it YAY now just bask in the glow

 

[canuk-gal]

HI:

IX nay on the OOP snay. Imagine HOW disappointed you''d be if you acutally found the ring--it would take all the fun/importance/symbolism out of the (yours and his) moment".

cheers--Sharon