Dress shopping solo?

[luckystar112]

I feel like such a loser.

Mom lives in Maine...
FMIL lives in Virginia...
3 out of 4 BMs live in Maine...

The one BM that I live next to is excited to go dress shopping with me, but literally has NO time. I asked her for her schedule weeks ago. Actually, I'm beginning to get pretty frustrated with her. First she wasn't able to go on the weekends, then all of a sudden she IS able to, but only on Sundays. But not THIS Sunday because her and her boyfriend have plans. So what about Tuesday or Thursday? That'll work as long as it's after 6pm. Well most shops close at 6pm, so I change shops. That'll work. She tells me to schedule an appointment at a salon, so I do and get back to her. WAIT....she can't that day....

So needless to say I'm going by myself. At least to this one shop. I absolutely MUST start looking now, because I am the most indecisive person in the world (weddng colors, wedding band, keep my setting or get a new one?).

Has anyone ever gone by themselves? Is it as depressing and embarressing as I think it will be?

 

[neatfreak]

Honestly? I think it is best to go by yourself the first few times to see what YOU like before you start getting other people''s opinions messed up in things.

I went by myself to maybe 3 different dress shops, picked out my favs at each shop, THEN brought one of my best friends to help me choose from the ones I had already pre-selected. Since she has such different taste from me I knew if she saw me in some poufy confection she might be trying to sway me that way, when I really wanted something simple. Since I had already pre-selected ones I liked, she was able to be more objective about each one instead of letting her own preferences for dress looks get in the way.

Hope that made sense!

 

[chellebelle]

Aww I'm sorry luckystar! I hate when people do that!

But if it gives you any reassurance, I've been dress shopping by myself and it was great! It was kinda a relief to just go there without hearing a lot of different opinions coming at me at once. I was able to get a feel of what I liked in a calm setting and the gal who was helping me was really nice. Then I went back other times with one or two friends, which is something you can do when your friend figures out her schedule. hehe And that shop allowed me to take pics so I just brought them back here and posted them to get everyone's opinions.

If they let you take pictures, you should come back and share all the pretty dresses you find! So, no, I don't think it's a bad thing! Have fun trying on dresses! Good luck!

 

[luckystar112]

Neatfreak, I always know it''s gonna be a good one when you start your post with, "Honestly?"

I was thinking along those same lines too. This girl has the complete opposite sense of style as me.

So, it''s common for girls to go solo sometimes?

I just had this vision of girls in wedding dresses and tons of friends and family enjoying the experience with them....and then I walk in the door, alone, and they all stop mid-enjoyment and stare at me. Then, I feel it. The huge wave of pity.

I guess I''m overreacting huh?

 

[kcoursolle]

I went by myself except for the final dress try on and everything was fine!

I live in CA, parents and family are in MN and my friends are super busy and not into wedding stuff. I tried on everything by myself until the very final decision when I was debating between two dresses. Then I wrangled a friend into going and getting her opinion on the final two and which one to choose.

 

[luckystar112]

Thanks Chellebelle, I feel better already!!!

Off topic, I haven''t commented on your wedding thread yet--because I''ve been too in love and forwarding all the pictures to my mom and Grandmother with huge "THAT''S WHAT I WANT!" lettering. Love the feathers in the boquets, love the flower baskets on each row, love the BM dresses and the colors, love that you chose brown even though it is summer, and love the sunset! Your wedding rocked!

 

[luckystar112]

Phew! I''m so glad I''m not going to the "elephant in the room"!

 

[neatfreak]

Date: 9/21/2007 7:57:11 PM
Author: luckystar112
Phew! I'm so glad I'm not going to the 'elephant in the room'!

Not at all Lucky! I think a lot of girls do it and once you start reading all the bridal mags it is often one of their suggestions for exactly the reasons I specified above! Go and have fun! And bring pics back here!!!

 

[chellebelle]

Date: 9/21/2007 7:55:23 PM
Author: luckystar112
Thanks Chellebelle, I feel better already!!!

Off topic, I haven't commented on your wedding thread yet--because I've been too in love and forwarding all the pictures to my mom and Grandmother with huge 'THAT'S WHAT I WANT!' lettering. Love the feathers in the boquets, love the flower baskets on each row, love the BM dresses and the colors, love that you chose brown even though it is summer, and love the sunset! Your wedding rocked!

Oh thank you!!! You're so sweet! It means so much to me to hear such kind words because I just loved planning everything and all the little details.... I kinda wanna do it for a living!

As far as the brown, I really debated that (summer wedding and all) but I went for it and I'm glad you thought it was a good idea.

And as far as you, go go go and have fun! Your "elephant" comment made me giggle.... you will NOT be an elephant! It really will be a great experience and you'll get to try on pretty dresses and really get a feel for what *you* like.

I never felt like I was looked at funny when I went alone. And your idea of "tons and friends and family" is sometimes not a pleasant one... think chaos and bickering and different opinions and frustration. Well, that's not the case with everyone, but I've seen it before! hehe Can't wait to hear back from you and what you find!

 

[robbie3982]

Awe, I feel your pain. I did most of my dress shopping on my own too since none of my BMs live in OH. I got to go once w/ Sabine and I think twice with my mom (we fought both times lol).

Going alone really wasn''t bad, but it did get a little depressing when I saw girls with big entourages getting all excited.

 

[larussel03]

aw, don't feel bad -- I went alone because I moved to MI from MA, where the wedding is (and to multiple shops alone), and it's kinda sad b/c everyone's there with their friends, fam etc, but honestly I preferred it. Wedding dresses are all about personal taste and expressing your personality, and when others come into play, it makes your decision harder b/c you worry about what they think.

I kinda think the brial salon workers like when you go by yourself too...they don't get aggrivated by the other people you bring so they seem to be even more helpful!

Honestly, I preferred going it alone. I could take my time, try on and re-try on what I wanted and get in and out without having to try on dresses other people find and think will look good on you. That's annoying and takes lots o' time!!

 

[larussel03]

Date: 9/21/2007 8:21:16 PM
Author: robbie3982
Awe, I feel your pain. I did most of my dress shopping on my own too since none of my BMs live in OH. I got to go once w/ Sabine and I think twice with my mom (we fought both times lol).

Going alone really wasn''t bad, but it did get a little depressing when I saw girls with big entourages getting all excited.

Hey robbie! Not to thread hijack, but do you ever venture up to Ann Arbor? If you do, let me know we could hang out with blenheim! (I see her pretty frequently!)

 

[robbie3982]

Date: 9/21/2007 8:26:59 PM
Author: *~Sweetpea~*

Date: 9/21/2007 8:21:16 PM
Author: robbie3982
Awe, I feel your pain. I did most of my dress shopping on my own too since none of my BMs live in OH. I got to go once w/ Sabine and I think twice with my mom (we fought both times lol).

Going alone really wasn''t bad, but it did get a little depressing when I saw girls with big entourages getting all excited.

Hey robbie! Not to thread hijack, but do you ever venture up to Ann Arbor? If you do, let me know we could hang out with blenheim! (I see her pretty frequently!)

I''ve never been there before. I just mapquested though and it''s a bit over 3.5 hrs away. Not too far for a get together possibly

 

[Gypsy]

Oh honey I went to quite a few myself. And you know what? It''s great. I''m indecive too. And I was really able to figure out what looked best on me, and what I want in a gown in PEACE. Go to a really friendly shop. During the week. So you get lots of friendly attention and you''ll feel like the belle of the ball, AND you''ll be happy you did it. TAKE A CAMERA. Beg them to let you use it (hopefully they just go along with it), and post for us. We''ll help you out on the picking if you want it!

Or, call for a GTG at a bridal shop! LOL. I''m betting all the PSers and bling and wedding gowns will make for an event to remember!

 

[Independent Gal]

Add me to the solo-dress-shopper list. My 87 yr old cousin came with me once, and a friend came a couple of times, including to give the nod to the one I ended up getting, but mostly I''ve been shopping on my own. My mom, sister, and fake-bm''s live thousands of miles away.

It''s not so bad. I find that other brides and their families are pretty chatty, so you can get honest opinions from them if you want them on the spot.

Just make sure you take your digital camera. I found that most of the salons, even chi-chi ones, let me take pics when I explained that my mom was oceans away and I wanted to show her stuff.

 

[Tacori E-ring]

If you lived here I would go with you!

Maybe you can narrow down the search on your own that way when she CAN go with you no time will be wasted. Take a camera and we''ll all give you our honest opinions!

 

[Harleigh]

luckystar,

I''m sorry about your crappy friend! I''m figuring out that some of mine are just as crappy...isn''t that sad??? If I could, I''d go with you...I''ve gone by myself several times, and I find it''s sometimes easier without everyone spouting out their opinions, what they would choose, etc... I think you should start out solo, and if you really hate that idea, could you take a not-so-close friend or a co-worker who would just be honest (no jealousy, no hidden agenda, and so on...) that would just be a trooper and help you weed through the good, the bad and the ugly?

Sometimes I think you get better service when you''re alone because the ladies in the shop are only dealing with you, not you and family and friends, etc... THEN, when you have it narrowed down (meaning, of course, that you''ve posted all the ones you like on here and we''ve HELPED you narrow it down!

) that you take a few people close to you to help make the final decision if need be, which you may not when it''s all said and done!

I''ve done most of my shopping on ebay, but that''s only after going and trying on a ton of things to figure out what I might like, hate, looks fabulous, looks horrible, etc..., and only you know what you are truly comfortable in.

Give the girls here a shout out...I think a GTG and dress shopping together sounds fabulous! We''d have to reserve the bridal shop for the day because I''m sure we''d simply take the place by storm!

Good luck, hun, and don''t let your icky friend get you down!

 

[Jas12]

I went alone about 4 times...when I found a dress that I thought was a contender I went back to it with ONLY my mom or my sister (the only ppl i would trust for unbiased opinions)
I would keep shopping alone, narrow down your options and then get that darn BM (or someone you trust) to come along if you reallly need a second opinion....

 

[zoebartlett]

I''ve gone alone, and in fact, I found the dress I wanted on one of my solo trips. I didn''t actually choose it until my mom could come back with me a few weeks later, but I was fine on my own. At a few of the places I went to (like the big chains like David''s), I found it overwhelming and the sales staff not particularly helpful. The place I got my dress is a smaller shop and the girl who helped me is wonderful. I think that makes the difference, no matter if you''re shopping by yourself or with someone.