E-ring upgrade or new diamond jewelry negotiations

[jaysonsmom]

How does it go?

Here''s how it works at our house....

Me: Did you see the e-mails I sent you with all the links?
Him: You know I delete all your e-mails because they''re always about diamonds
Me: I think it''s time for a new ring, our X anniversary is coming up
Him: I told you, you''ll get it on our 10th anniversary
Me: But diamond prices are on the rise, we have to act NOW
Him: I''m not listening to you, I told you you''ll get it, but not right now
Me: But our stocks are doing so well (or you just got a bonus, or we just got a fat tax return)
Him: You’ll get it, but not NOW.
Me: Chaaaarrrrrrge It!
I’m just curious as to how other couples discuss this. I’ve seen some extremes on PS, such as husbands saying “no upgrades, end of discussion” to “I’m going to surprise my wife of 15 years with a 3 ct D IF honker!”

 

[ursulawrite]

I need to know this secret, too.

My husband''s salary is going to triple next year and I''d love to talk upgrades. Alas, he has been firm in the past -- on grounds of sentimentality -- that upgrading my 1.3 carat e-ring is a no-go.

I already have an eternity band and 1.98 tcw earrings, and I don''t wear bracelets or necklaces. So, it''s all about the ring.

Please, those ladies with diamond-partial husbands, we need to talk!

 

[cnspotts]

I''m still waiting for DH to notice my new ring!

 

[LadyluvsLuxury]

Well here is how it goes at my house.

Me: honey, don''t you think I deserve an upgraded ring?
Him: Yes but in due time.
Me: but...
Him: no ''buts''
I then proceed to flash him.
Him: ''OK'' $XXXXXXXX is your limit.

I don''t know it seems to work everytime.

 

[jaysonsmom]

Date: 8/16/2005 5:01:07 PM
Author: LadyluvsLuxury
Well here is how it goes at my house.

Me: honey, don''t you think I deserve an upgraded ring?
Him: Yes but in due time.
Me: but...
Him: no ''buts''
I then proceed to flash him.
Him: ''OK'' $XXXXXXXX is your limit.

I don''t know it seems to work everytime.

After nursing 2 kids, I know THAT isn''t going to work.....he''d rather upgrade my boobs!

 

[laney]

Well, here''s how mine went..


Me: OMG! I broke my diamond on the shopping cart
Him: Thank god we got insurance
Him: Well, I guess we should upgrade you now.. This will be IT for a while!


Hint, hint!

Just kidding.

 

[jaysonsmom]

Date: 8/16/2005 5:27:56 PM
Author: laney
Well, here''s how mine went..


Me: OMG! I broke my diamond on the shopping cart
Him: Thank god we got insurance
Him: Well, I guess we should upgrade you now.. This will be IT for a while!


Hint, hint!

Just kidding.

Good one!

I''m going to have to find a sledge hammer to "accidently" run my e-ring into.

 

[LadyluvsLuxury]

Date: 8/16/2005 5:19:16 PM
Author: jaysonsmom

Date: 8/16/2005 5:01:07 PM
Author: LadyluvsLuxury
Well here is how it goes at my house.

Me: honey, don''t you think I deserve an upgraded ring?
Him: Yes but in due time.
Me: but...
Him: no ''buts''
I then proceed to flash him.
Him: ''OK'' $XXXXXXXX is your limit.

I don''t know it seems to work everytime.

After nursing 2 kids, I know THAT isn''t going to work.....he''d rather upgrade my boobs!

LOL My abs hurt too much laugh!

 

[jaysonsmom]

OMG, I just read DeannaBana''s response to this thread UPGRADE PLEA

and it was so truly heartfelt, that I feel that it''ll really work!

 

[ame]

Date: 8/16/2005 5:01:07 PM
Author: LadyluvsLuxury
Well here is how it goes at my house.


Me: honey, don''t you think I deserve an upgraded ring?

Him: Yes but in due time.

Me: but...

Him: no ''buts''

I then proceed to flash him.

Him: ''OK'' $XXXXXXXX is your limit.

I don''t know it seems to work everytime.

I wish that worked for me. His maps and nerd conventions suck a lot of money out of us that he doesn''t pay attention to. I bet you if I added up all the maps and map books and the ticket price, hotel price, gas price and event prices for the convention he goes to THursday that it totals WELL OVER $2K, and that''s being stingy. That could have paid for part of an upgrade...or the pear sidestones.... but I get "we can''t afford it now, we have to fix the plumbing. Oh guess what I got another book on Ebay today". And he doesn''t even notice the steam come out of every orafice.

 

[IrishEyes]

Date: 8/16/2005 5:19:16 PM
Author: jaysonsmom

Date: 8/16/2005 5:01:07 PM
Author: LadyluvsLuxury
Well here is how it goes at my house.

Me: honey, don''t you think I deserve an upgraded ring?
Him: Yes but in due time.
Me: but...
Him: no ''buts''
I then proceed to flash him.
Him: ''OK'' $XXXXXXXX is your limit.

I don''t know it seems to work everytime.

After nursing 2 kids, I know THAT isn''t going to work.....he''d rather upgrade my boobs!

OMG that is too funny!!

Mine went like this:

Me: Honey I LOVE my diamond now, but I think I''m ready for a slightly bigger stone
Him: Really? what''s wrong with the one I got you?
Me: Oh nothing, nothing at all! It''s beautiful! I want to put it in a necklace! But I''d like something a little larger now, maybe a 1.40 carat or something.
Him: Hmm. How much?
Me: I saw some nice ones on whiteflash for around $8000.
Him: So you have that amount in your account?
Me: Excuse me? MY account?
Him: Yes. your account. you want the upgrade, YOU pay for it. I bought the first one.
Me: But honey, I love you!
Him: I love you too! No upgrade.
(I storm out of the room)

 

[Mara]

HA HA this is so funny I had to read it to my coworker...

In our house:

Me: Here honey have some more wine!
Him: Oh thanks honey, mmm that's good
Me: Here honey have some more wine!
Him: Oh look I drank the whole bottle?!
Me: Oh let's go in the jet tub now, I got us new foaming bubbles!
Him: Oh okay, grab the chocolate
Me: Oh let's take the champagne too!
Him: Oh wow this champagne is going to my head!
Me: So I found this diamond and it's only XYZ amount if I get it now. What do you think?
Him: Oh that champagne is good! Can I have another glass?
Me: So what do you think? It's really a good deal...and if I get it now vs later it's 30% less!
Him: Oh you are so good at finding those deals. Sure as long as it's a good deal and we can pay the property taxes.
Me: Thanks honey I love you. Here's the chocolate!

well it's not quite SO easy but that was how the last one or two went.

For the next tone, I basically said, well this one 1.6 will tide me over for now but next spring I am going to 2.25! and he said 'well as long as the bills are paid and all other financial obligations are met'. I said OK. So that's our deal.

I also got him to tell me over a bottle of wine that he was 'more ready to get married' than I would think and i shold 'just take him to go look at rings already'. So obviously alcohol goes to my sweetie's head.

 

[jaysonsmom]

Date: 8/16/2005 6:59:22 PM
Author: Mara
I also got him to tell me over a bottle of wine that he was ''more ready to get married'' than I would think and i shold ''just take him to go look at rings already''. So obviously alcohol goes to my sweetie''s head.

That''s the story my husband tells people....that I plied him with a bottle of wine to get him to propose. But, you''re right, wine DOES work wonders.....Off to get a nice bottle of syrah for dinner.

 

[canuk-gal]

Date: 8/16/2005 6:20:06 PM
Author: ame


I wish that worked for me. His maps and nerd conventions suck a lot of money out of us that he doesn''t pay attention to. I bet you if I added up all

HI;

LOLOL!....BTW, whats a nerd

convention?

In our house there is no talking about this sort if thing....we have an unspoken understanding that he credits the accounts and I debit them. I consider it 20 years payment in lieu of what otherwise would have been spent on therapist bills (he is a lovely man, but rather a "high upkeep" model

)....

cheers--Sharon

 

[Matata]

Me: I want it.
Him: Ok.

The jewelry thing is easy.....but if we''re talking about a house, furniture, new car, or even a good purse.... oy, wine, withholding sex, pleading, threatening, whining...nothing works. I can''t figure it out.

 

[Dancing Fire]

Date: 8/16/2005 5:01:07 PM
Author: LadyluvsLuxury
Well here is how it goes at my house.

Me: honey, don''t you think I deserve an upgraded ring?
Him: Yes but in due time.
Me: but...
Him: no ''buts''
I then proceed to flash him.
Him: ''OK'' $XXXXXXXX is your limit.

I don''t know it seems to work everytime.

my wife wouldn''t dare to try that on me b/c, she know i would say "give me back those rings"

 

[ame]

Date: 8/16/2005 7:42:44 PM
Author: canuk-gal

Date: 8/16/2005 6:20:06 PM

Author: ame




I wish that worked for me. His maps and nerd conventions suck a lot of money out of us that he doesn''t pay attention to. I bet you if I added up all

HI;


LOLOL!....BTW, whats a nerd

convention?


In our house there is no talking about this sort if thing....we have an unspoken understanding that he credits the accounts and I debit them. I consider it 20 years payment in lieu of what otherwise would have been spent on therapist bills (he is a lovely man, but rather a ''high upkeep'' model

)....


cheers--Sharon

I married what is referred to as a "gaming nerd"...Dungeons and Dragons, Everquest....Civilization....

, though he has "retired". What the hell was I thinking they never retire.. hehe...he and his buddies go to the
GEN CON in Indy every year...he gets to play role playing nerd games and talk about nerd things while I sit around my house and enjoy him not being there hogging my bed. It''s a win win. This weekend I have no plans (yay!) besides working on my album and watching chick stuff on tv, reading mags, inspecting my rings constantly without ridicule and sitting around in my underwear playing online.

I thinkmy dad is going to come destroy my bathroom plumbing with my brother''s girlfriend''s dad so I geuss there will be limited underwear sitting.

 

[ursulawrite]

Date: 8/16/2005 7:49:00 PM
Author: Matata
Me: I want it.
Him: Ok.

The jewelry thing is easy.....but if we''re talking about a house, furniture, new car, or even a good purse.... oy, wine, withholding sex, pleading, threatening, whining...nothing works. I can''t figure it out.

And I married the man who is spending six figures on hiring an architect/contractor to work on renovating half of our 1400 sf ft apartment! Nuts. Maybe we could do without some lighting or something. That should get me an extra 0.2 carats

 

[msb700]

hahahah! this is a hilarious thread....for me this is how it worked:

Day 1:
Me: (flipping thru cosmo/in style/marie claire -u name it)...Honey! Look at this tacori set! yummmmmmy!
Him: eehhheem...(continues to watch TV)
Day 2:
Me: (flipping thru cosmo/in style/marie claire -u name it)...Honey! Look at this diamond ring!! isn''t it amazing?
Him: ehhheem...(continues to watch TV)
Day 3:
Me: (flipping thru cosmo/in style/marie claire -u name it)...Honey! Look at this tacori set! yummmmmmy!
Him: eehhheem...(continues to watch TV)
Day 4:
Me: (flipping thru cosmo/in style/marie claire -u name it)...Honey! Look at this diamond ring!! isn''t it amazing?
Him: ehhheem...(continues to watch TV)
...
Day gazillion:
Me: Honey...u know those rings i shove down ur throat and u ignore??
Him: eeeheeem (continues to watch TV)
Me: Well, there is this store here where we can customize our own rings and it would be a fraction on what those rings would have cost u!
Him: eeeheeem....
Day gazillion and one:
(out shopping)
Me: (strolls into the jewelery store)....
Him: you''re not going to let this go are u? okay okay, u deserve it...let''s see what they have...

 

[flower12]

this topic is fun

I do

ME: so......what is secret of keep married well ?

DH: say yes honey

ME: can I buy Jewelry?

DH: yes......Honey

most time this is work well.

 

[Diamonds4Me]

Date: 8/17/2005 3:47:55 AM
Author: flower12
this topic is fun

I do

ME: so......what is secret of keep married well ?

DH: say yes honey

ME: can I buy Jewelry?

DH: yes......Honey

most time this is work well.

LMAO! I haven''t tried that one yet!

 

[Diamonds4Me]

I think H2b is starting to get it into his head that I really like this stuff

Just last night we were watching James Bond, Daimonds are Forever

and out of no where he pipes up, "I bet you''re loving the intro to this one"...

But this is usually how ours go:

Me:Did you see what so and so got for x-mas, b-day, just because, etc.?
Him:Uh huh
Me:Wasn''t it beautiful??
Him:Uh huh

Several Months Later:
Me:Did you see what so and so got for x-mas, b-day, just because, etc.?
Him:Uh huh
Me:Wasn''t it beautiful??
Him:Uh huh

Two years Later:
Me:Did you see what so and so got for x-mas, b-day, just because, etc.?
Him:Uh huh
Me:Wasn''t it beautiful??
Him:Uh huh

About two months ago:
Him: Your birthday''s coming up.
Me:So?
Him: So pick something out already.
Me:OK!

 

[jellybean]

My neighbor told me her story about the surprise 2ct oval ring she received for her 10th anniversary:


Her: OMG! Honey, it''s gorgeous! I love it!
Him: Happy anniversary! How much do you love it?

Couple runs upstairs to the bedroom...

2 days later...
Him: Oh! I see you''re wearing your new ring!
Her: I love this ring! I''m never taking it off!
Him: How much do you love it?

Her: Lots!....
Couple runs upstairs to the bedroom...

The next day....
Him: I heard you telling the neighbor about your new ring!
Her: Yes! Everyone is jealous! This ring is fabulous! I love it!
Him: How much do you love it?

Her: Oh....allright...
He runs upstairs, she walks up slowly...

The next day....
Him: Honey! You''re not wearing your new ring!
Her: I can''t afford to anymore! I''m too tired!!!!


She totally had me cracking up with that one.

She didn''t return the ring, but apparently her husband thought by getting her the ring he got a free pass to nookie-nookie whenever he wanted.

 

[jaysonsmom]

Date: 8/18/2005 8:55:32 AM
Author: jellybean
My neighbor told me her story about the surprise 2ct oval ring she received for her 10th anniversary:


Her: OMG! Honey, it''s gorgeous! I love it!
Him: Happy anniversary! How much do you love it?

Couple runs upstairs to the bedroom...

2 days later...
Him: Oh! I see you''re wearing your new ring!
Her: I love this ring! I''m never taking it off!
Him: How much do you love it?

Her: Lots!....
Couple runs upstairs to the bedroom...

The next day....
Him: I heard you telling the neighbor about your new ring!
Her: Yes! Everyone is jealous! This ring is fabulous! I love it!
Him: How much do you love it?

Her: Oh....allright...
He runs upstairs, she walks up slowly...

The next day....
Him: Honey! You''re not wearing your new ring!
Her: I can''t afford to anymore! I''m too tired!!!!


She totally had me cracking up with that one.

She didn''t return the ring, but apparently her husband thought by getting her the ring he got a free pass to nookie-nookie whenever he wanted.

I''ve even resorted to that kind of bribery with my hubby.....I told him that if he got me my upgrade now, he''d get anything he wanted, whenever he wanted.....he didn''t believe me.

 

[Mara]

LOL JellyBean!!! That is the funniest story.

 

[jaysonsmom]

Date: 8/16/2005 4:37:53 PM
Author:jaysonsmom

Me: Did you see the e-mails I sent you with all the links?
Him: You know I delete all your e-mails because they''re always about diamonds

He lied, and got caught.....I recently sent him a link to a stone that I wanted, it cost something like $18700. HE told me he deleted the e-mail, didn''t even look. However, last night my bro was talking about how he HAD to sat at his current job for a couple extra weeks to become fully vested and get an additional 19K before he left for his new job here in CA. When I told him to just forget about the 19K and move here already....my husband slipped and said: "how can you tell him to give up on the additional 19K? That''s the price of your bling!"

 

[icekid]

haha, I love this thread! I''m not even engaged yet, and my bf knows that THE ring is coming for our 5 or 10 year anniversary. So at least he''s already well-prepared. he''s lucky I have tiny hands, at least.