Ear Piercing for Lily-uneven holes- What would you do?

[mrssalvo]

Ok, so I''ll will try to keep this short. In sept we were at the mall and my older daughter wanted to get her ears pierced. We went for it and everything went smoothly. So, of course when we get home Lily see''s her big sister and wants to get her ears pierced too. IT''s all I heard about for ever so I gave in. Now, keep in mind she''s 2, will be 3 next month. So, we go to the place, I make sure there are 2 gals working so they can do it at the same time. They count and pull but the gal doing her left ear couldn''t get the earring though. At this point Lily is scared and crying but I went ahead and had them do it again. 30 minutes later she is showing off and fine. Well, about a week later, she is taking off her dress and it gets caught on her earring and the earring comes off. She let me put it back in but remembers the pain and was very upset about it. A few days after that, we''re out of town and she is just standing still and the earring falls off. at this point i''m thinking i''ve got a defective pair b/c those starter sets aren''t supposed to just fall off. I get it back in but she is just freaked out. Another week goes by and she comes downstairs and I look at her and the same earring is missing. at this point several hours had passed with no earring and the hole started to close up. again, she''s a trooper, lets me put it in but the whole experience has been stressful for both of us and if i had it to do over I would wait until she''s a bit older. I emailed customer service and they were super, gave me a refund and a gift card. Now, it''s been about 8 weeks, she can change her earrings. I wasn''t planning on changing them for quite some time but then my oldest was pulling a necklace off Lily and you guessed it..off comes the earring again. the only way Lily would let me put an earring back in was if I changed them to pink heart studs she picked out. So, I agreed and we took out the starter set (which are really cute diamond flowers) Now that the bigger earrings are out and the studs are in I realize that the earring holes are not even. her right ear is perfectly centered, but the left trauma ear is a little lower. So my question is, should I just take it out and let the hole fill in so in a couple of years they can re-pierce it so it''s more center or am I making way to big a deal and I should just leave it alone. I just worry that when she''s a teenager she''s going to say "mom, why didn''t you let it grow back when I was little and didn''t know better" by the time she''s 13 the holes will be permanant. My holes are not perfect and it''s ok, but her''s are just enough off my eye is drawn to it, at least with the studs. So, what do you all think?

sorry, it ended up long anyway

 

[basil]

Take it out.

A similar thing happened to me. I was 10 when I got my ears pierced. The person at the mall put one in at an angle (the front was higher than the back). My mom took out the earring (that night) and we let it heal up and then got it repierced about a month later. I had to wear my hair all sorts of funny ways for that month in order that my one earring not show. But now my holes are even.

If she''s 3, she won''t be bothered by the one earring thing. I don''t know how long it will take them to heal since she''s had the earring in for 6 weeks now. I think in the long run, it''ll be worth it. Looking back on it, the waiting and trauma was worth having even holes.

 

[Ellen]

I''d personally take them both out and let them grow back. To me that''s easier than trying to deal with one ear pierced and one not!

btw, love the name Lilly.

 

[mrssalvo]

thanks basil and ellen. I''m going to look at them again when she gets up today and decide. She just loves having her earrings so I hate taking them away from her. the one hole is perfect and the same one we''ve never had any problems with so since it''s not bothering her, I may just leave it in even though she''ll look very eighty''s with only one earring. I feel like i''m being foolish b/c it''s only a tiny bit off, i never noticed it with the starter set, but it bugs me

 

[belle]

leave it to me to be the dissenter

but i would just leave them. young ears are small and the slightest difference might look ''off'' because there isn''t a whole lotta lobe but it will become much less noticable over time. besides, you still have the chance of it not being perfectly centered again with the next piercing. how many times do you want to have it redone before you are satisfied with the placement? i just wouldn''t risk it.

 

[mrssalvo]

thanks belle. your words are the reason I haven''t done it yet

I just talked to my sister who was with me the day we did it and she thinks I just just take them both out and wait until she''s older. This whole process was hard, after the missed ear the first time Lily doesn''t even want me to clean them. Many nights I went in and did it after she was asleep. Now, my 4 year old has been a dream. She sits still, lets me do whatever I need to do. the 21 months age difference has proved to be very different. I agree that a new hole may not be perfect but the current is low and I worry that might cause problems when she gets older and want to wear hoops, it would be easier for them to pull through. Even though she''d look silly i probably would only take out one. They could at least match up the current hole and get closer and a little higher up in the middle of her lobe.

 

[Maria D]

I feel for you mrssalvo! When my daughter finally wanted her ears pierced (age 11) I took her to the mall. I was very concerned that the holes be even. Mine are perfectly even and I always appreciated that because I have several friends who bemoan that theirs aren''t! So, when we got to Claire''s at the mall and the technician (salesperson) had a marker to dot the ears, I wanted to dot them on myself. She could not let me do that. She said that in order for her to pierce my daughter''s ears, she was obliged to be the only one handling anything -- for liability reasons. So I let her draw the dots on, took a look, and made her wipe off one of them with isopropyl alcohol and draw again! (All the while thinking, I should have put the dots on myself before I got here.)

In your situationa, I would definitely let the "defective" hole close up and get it repierced later. You can put a dot on exactly where you want it before you go. At this point, I would be worried not just about asymmetry but about the fact that the earring keeps falling out. Is the hole somehow bigger?

 

[mrssalvo]

thanks maria. the claire''s i took my 4 year old two was great. they dotted them and they were perfect. Lily''s gal dotted but with the miss and having to hold her head for the second try, i''m sure she squirmed. No, the hole isn''t big, the started set was just defective and when I called claire''s she said they''d been having other problems with that style of earring. my neice who is 1, also had the same kind and hears has fallen out several times too. Both of them never even touch their ears, so it''s strange. the more i look at it the more i''m bothered. i hate to have to repierce both b/c one is done right. if i mark the spot for the redo and take her to the claire''s that did my 4 year old, i''m sure it will do fine. i also heard of gals putting orajel on the ears to numb them a bit.

 

[belle]

maybe she can bring back the trend of wearing just one earring!

seriously though, i know you will make a good decision. it just stinks that you even have to be put in that position

i hope it goes well, whatever you decide.

 

[Maria D]

I would definitely let the one close up and get it done later. It sounds like it''s bothering you more and more, not less and less. When your daughter is older, she won''t be squirmy and you''ll be all set.

What a girly-girl you''ve got there! My daughter didn''t care one lick about anything to do with her appearance until 6th grade.

 

[mrssalvo]

Date: 11/21/2006 9:52:56 AM
Author: Maria D


What a girly-girl you''ve got there! My daughter didn''t care one lick about anything to do with her appearance until 6th grade.

you are not kidding. I was a tomboy growing up so all this girly stuff is new to me. Lily loves to wear dresses and skirts, loves to have her nails painted and sits still while I do it and while the polish drys. She love jewelry and anything girly. She''s a hoot.

I just asked hubby to look at Lily closely to see if it''s noticable to him. he noticed right away that the left earring was lower. His vote is to take it out and wait until she''s older for the redo. He thought I should leave in the good one in and doesn''t care that she looks silly.

 

[mrssalvo]

ok, i actually measured to make sure i''m not crazy. the left ear hole is almost a half a centemeter lower than the right. pretty big difference on a tiny lobe right?

 

[Tacori E-ring]

If it bothers you I would take them out ASAP to let the heal. Is it obvious?

 

[ladykemma]

if it''s ok with your little one, i would get the crooked one redone.

 

[Cind11]

I would definitely let either just the "off" one or both of them close. I didn''t get my ears pierced until I was 16 and one of mine is lower. It really bugs me because if I ever wear a heavier earring in the lower ear piercing it looks weird. When my two girls got their ears pierced, I was adamant that both holes be exactly the same. Maybe you should let both close, age two is so young and she''ll have many years to get them repierced.

 

[swingirl]

Take it out and let it heal until your daughter is old enough to take care of a peircing. Earrings are an adornment that get in the way of the life and play of a very young child. What is the point of having a painful ear lobe? Sorry, I just don''t think jewelry belongs on a toddler and your daughter''s situation proves it.

I do have a daughter and she was able to survive her childhood understanding that earrings were for older girls just like high-heals, make-up, bras, dating and driving.

And since children heal so fast, her hole will have a chance to heal now and she''ll have a chance on having nice symetric holes when she is older and when her earlopes are larger.

 

[Allisonfaye]

I would let them heal. I have one that is angled wrong and I hate it. I wish I had had a professional do it instead of my sister''s friend. Maybe you could use something else as a treat to get her to forget about them? Are you at all worried that at age 2, she might put the in her mouth and choke? I know even at almost 3, I still occasionally catch my daughter putting something in her mouth that she shouldn''t.

 

[sumbride]

Take it out, one or both.

My niece got hers done and they were too low so she let them grown in and got them done again. she was older, maybe 6, so she understood better, but it''s just easier to let it grow in and redo them when she''s older and better able to handle the process.

 

[poptart]

I would take both of them out so she can just start fresh when she''s older.

*M*

 

[mrssalvo]

Date: 11/21/2006 12:14:10 PM
Author: swingirl
Take it out and let it heal until your daughter is old enough to take care of a peircing. Earrings are an adornment that get in the way of the life and play of a very young child. What is the point of having a painful ear lobe? Sorry, I just don''t think jewelry belongs on a toddler and your daughter''s situation proves it.


I do have a daughter and she was able to survive her childhood understanding that earrings were for older girls just like high-heals, make-up, bras, dating and driving.


And since children heal so fast, her hole will have a chance to heal now and she''ll have a chance on having nice symetric holes when she is older and when her earlopes are larger.

swingirl, thanks for your input. I don''t want to turn this into a debate on the appropriate age for earpiercing. I heard enough from my mother in law this weekend who isn''t even aware of the problem. I don''t think what''s happened to here has anything to do with her age. I already did say, if i had it to do over I would wait until she was older. my 4 year old has done fabulously with hers. I also know people who had them done as babies and they made it through their childhoods just fine. I just don''t agree that earrings are just for older girls. My mom made me wait until I was 13. I decided I would let my girls do it when they wanted to. No pressure from me whatsoever. My 4 year old brought it up on her own and understood that it would hurt and wanted to do it anyway. Lily wanted to follow suit and I really did not think or expect their to be a problem. I was wrong obviously but I do believe what happened to her could happen to any one at any age.

 

[mrssalvo]

Date: 11/21/2006 12:47:38 PM
Author: Allisonfaye
I would let them heal. I have one that is angled wrong and I hate it. I wish I had had a professional do it instead of my sister''s friend. Maybe you could use something else as a treat to get her to forget about them? Are you at all worried that at age 2, she might put the in her mouth and choke? I know even at almost 3, I still occasionally catch my daughter putting something in her mouth that she shouldn''t.

allison, i actually never planned on even changing her earrings. The starter set is really cute and i was just going to leave them in for a couple of years. why mess with them. I don''t have any extra earrings around for her to even play with. I honestly don''t worry at all about her putting them in her mouth and choking. She doesn''t put anything in her mouth now. She''s been playing with big toy jewelry for some time and completely understands what''s it for. I''ve never caught her putting anything in her mouth that she shouldn''t.

 

[Maria D]

It is quite common in some cultures for girls to get their ears pierced as babies. My mother (born in Italy) had hers done as a baby. She tried to get mine pierced by my pediatrician when I was a baby but he wouldn''t do it until I was 6. By the time I was 6, I already had a big collection of earrings from grandmothers who were waiting patiently for my ears to get pierced! (Italian gold, too)

 

[diamondsrock]

well I''m no expert on pierced ears (mine closed up) but I would take them out and let them heal. She can always have them done later. The unevenness may be even more apparent later on as her ear grows. What is centered on a baby or toddler''s ear may not end up being centered later on as an adult. I heard that somewhere but can''t remember where. Not sure if it''s true.

 

[mrssalvo]

Date: 11/21/2006 2:08:01 PM
Author: diamondsrock
well I''m no expert on pierced ears (mine closed up) but I would take them out and let them heal. She can always have them done later. The unevenness may be even more apparent later on as her ear grows. What is centered on a baby or toddler''s ear may not end up being centered later on as an adult. I heard that somewhere but can''t remember where. Not sure if it''s true.

I don''t know other than what friends i have who had it done as babies. All of them whose were centered to begin with are still centered now. I did read once that our earlobes never stop growing which is why the lobes seem to get larger as we get older, you really notice it in the elderly...

 

[Kaleigh]

Honestly, I''d take them out and let the holes close and get them redone once she''s older. JMHO, good luck!!

 

[mrssalvo]

Thanks gals. I did take the low one out. I talked to gal at Claire''s and she said they heal up very quickly on little kids so I can decide if I want to repierce it later when she''s ready. I really do hate to take out the right one because it''s perfect and I run the risk of 2 people getting them both right again. So, for now she''s rockin'' 80''s style and I''ll have to decide if I''m going to take out the good one...

 

[Christa]

Since she''s so young and fights having them cleaned I''d probably take them both out and start over in a couple of years--chances are she won''t even remember all this by then.

My 14-year-old daughter''s holes are uneven and it bugs her, but too late to do anything about it now. She was a lot older than your daughter when we had them pierced, but I had the same dilemma--I knew they were uneven but didn''t want to go through re-doing it. Now I think she wishes I had.

 

[Kaleigh]

Date: 11/21/2006 2:40:34 PM
Author: mrssalvo
Thanks gals. I did take the low one out. I talked to gal at Claire''s and she said they heal up very quickly on little kids so I can decide if I want to repierce it later when she''s ready. I really do hate to take out the right one because it''s perfect and I run the risk of 2 people getting them both right again. So, for now she''s rockin'' 80''s style and I''ll have to decide if I''m going to take out the good one...

That''s a good point, since it''s perfect I guess leave it in and get the other one done down the road.

 

[mrssalvo]

Date: 11/21/2006 2:47:28 PM
Author: Christa
Since she''s so young and fights having them cleaned I''d probably take them both out and start over in a couple of years--chances are she won''t even remember all this by then.


My 14-year-old daughter''s holes are uneven and it bugs her, but too late to do anything about it now. She was a lot older than your daughter when we had them pierced, but I had the same dilemma--I knew they were uneven but didn''t want to go through re-doing it. Now I think she wishes I had.

well, she does let me clean them now and we made it 8 weeks with no infection of any type. I do agree i can just take them both out and redo the whole thing in a couple of years which is what i might just do. she''s funny though b/c she doesn''t want me to take the good one out. she likes it. but i can''t have her wearing one earring for the next 3 years.

what you''re saying happened with your daughter is exactly what i''m worried about which is why i want to fix it now, while she won''t remember and she heals quickly.

 

[Ellen]

Date: 11/21/2006 2:13:55 PM
Author: mrssalvo


I did read once that our earlobes never stop growing which is why the lobes seem to get larger as we get older, you really notice it in the elderly...

Oh goody, something to look forward to...