Ebree and JanineGirly

[NewEnglandLady]

Just wanted to wish you happy-one-month-to go! How are you doing? Yesterday was our 1-month mark and I''m seriously scrambling to get everything done. The "to do" list seems to grow every day despite me scratching things off the list as fast as possible. I''ll finish something and add two!

 

[E B]

NewEnglandLady,

Thanks for the good wishes! Yes, just one month to go. We have all vendors booked, and I'm just working on the smaller things now. I'm taking FH to Men's Wearhouse this weekend to buy his wedding suit, and I need to buy a guest book and finalize decor (linens, flowers, etc). Also, lighting! Having your reception outside in a garden at night can prove difficult when it comes to lighting. I'm waiting for a lighting quote right now, hoping it isn't in the thousands of dollars. Programs, ceremony music repertoire, things like that. I feel your pain; so many small details!

Also, I just found out it'll cost $30 a linen to rent linens fancier than your standard white cotton. That seems AWFULLY high to me, but my florist said it's reasonable. Yikes.

 

[NewEnglandLady]

You think that getting all of the major vendors booked is the biggest hurdle, and for the most part it is, but I feel like these nitty gritty details are getting to me more than I expected! We did the men''s wearhouse thing last weekend, thank goodness. That was on FI''s shoulders, but it''s nice to have it done. I''m sure you''ll be glad when that''s done.

Are your RSVPs back? Ours are due this week, so finalzing the exact number of tables, chairs, etc. is on hold. I couldn''t believe how much the linens were, either! When I found out our table linens were $35 each, I decided to go back to the rental place and choose something else. I think in the end they were $20 a piece. Those things definitely add up.

We''re still figuring out the lighting as well. I''m kind of nervous about it because ours will be outside after dark and I''m not sure if candles will be strong enough. What are you guys thinking of doing for lighting? The caterers are an issue for us because they''re cooking outdoors (clambake) and need light to pack up.

 

[janinegirly]

oh good idea starting this thread newengland! (nicole

).

You know i''ve been so busy that i didn''t even realize the one month mark. the details are definitely the most stressful! right now having stresses with the flowers because my mom wasn''t happy with the trial (i wasn''t either). we wanted ivory and peaches (soft, romantic), we got a couple peach roses and then LOTS of yellow, pinks and reds (huh?). so mom''s been going on and on about how the flowers are awful, and we should have gone with another florist, and YUP, it''s me she''s venting to.

THEN we have the rsvp''s trickling in, and of coruse the 10-12 who just don''t respond. So aggravating! Plus my dad randomly said he''d like a few more invitations to give out (he doesn''t grasp the whole etiquette thing, rsvp deadlines, calligraphy..). Also have room block drama since our hotel is very busy that wkend, so i''ve been wrangling with the sales office to honor my rate just a few more days while i try to ask guests if they''d like a room (even though I gave them the details months ago in STD''s, websites, and emails).

ARGH! The stuff that i need to get done for me (earrings, wedding night lingerie, purse, guestbook) are still there but at least I can control that.

After rsvp''s are finalized, we''ll then have seating chart and favors to look forward to.

sorry if this is rambling, i''m realizing as i''m writing that i''m in full stressed out bride mode!

PS we also have dance class tonight and so not i the mood!

 

[E B]

We're missing several RSVPs (about half), but people have another week to send 'em in (plus, I made the RSVP by date early just in case). We invited 122 people and so far, only 56 have responded YES (with ~10 responding NO). My caterer is pretty laid back, so I don't think it'll be too much of a problem.

As for lighting, I had *no* idea what to do until my site coordinator said a wedding that took place at my site last weekend had beautiful lighting, and she wanted to get me a quote. I think I'll get a spotlight for the dance floor, and possibly up-lighting for the stone columns that separate the covered portion of the patio with the uncovered portion. I just want things to be well enough lit so that people can see when they're walking, but still romantic. Does your reception site have a coordinator? You might ask about options that they offer or that companies they know of offer.

ETA: I just decided that we aren't going to do a guestbook, and we aren't doing favors either. Two things to scratch off the list. *Phew*

 

[NewEnglandLady]

Janine,

I had to chuckle a little when I read the description of the flowers you wanted vs. the flowers you got. How did reds and yellows get in there? And I understand wanting to vent, I''m sure your mom is frustrated, but so are you! She''s preachin'' to the choir

I''m finding that the things that are not in my control get at me more than the things that are. I''m also finding that the guests, while I love ''em, are stressing me out more than I anticipated. There''s nothing worse than trying to find accommodations or a guest who "forgot" to book their room. It''s stressful! And the RSVP additions are maddening! I get frustrated because it puts me in an awkward place.

And no, you''re not rambling at all. In addition to my crazy excel spreadsheet, talking about it kind of helps to get things in order.

EBree,

I''m where you are with the RSVPs. I mean, come on, they''re already addressed and have a stamp on them. Just put them in the mail!

Your lighting sounds gorgeous! We''re just renting a private estate because my entire family is staying with me for a couple of days before and after the wedding. It''s very much a "family affair"--we''re all setting everything up, we''re all making the rehearsal dinner, we''ll all be in the house which is where the ceremony and reception will be. I''m really looking forward to it, but I can''t lie: a coordinator would be nice!

 

[janinegirly]

glad we all agree rsvp''s are maddening! my due date was last friday, and there''s stiill the stubborn few who haven''t come in.

sometimes it''s really aggravating..bending over backwards to make sure guests have hotels, will know where to go when they get here, info on the town, things to do,..meanwhile some of them can''t just stick an envelope in the mail which i paid for!
we have meal selections on our rsvp''s so even another reason to mail them back! it''s funny how you can see certain guests'' true colors or depth of friendship (for lack of a better word) in this process. for example one of my friends is traveling from Hong Kong (!!) after being transferred there by surprise 2 months ago. Another family member is in his 90''s and rsvp''d within a week. And then there''s another friend (who FI''s know for 10+ yrs, went to his wedding) who says he can''t make it b/c there''s a football game. (

)!

 

[NewEnglandLady]

I completely agree. You know, now that I''ve gone through this I''m going to be more appreciative when I attend others'' weddings.

My welcome bags are the bane of my existence right now. I''ve spent many, many hours gathering information about things to do in the area, printed off directions to places of interest, put together snacks and "local" treats and I''m still waiting on 50% of the RSVPs! Oh well, what can you do? I have no doubt it will all come together.