feeling kind of depressed

[glaucomflecken]

hi girls

well i just got back from my "back home" bridal shower and bachelorette party. And I am feeling kind of depressed! I had 10 people back out at the last minute from my shower, and 4 from my bachelorette party. And Im like at a 50% rsvp of "yes" rate for the wedding itself. Its like all the people I thought for sure would come, the people I really wanted there, arent coming. Its almost like it doesnt feel like it will be my wedding without these people. My one friend just sent me an email saying he cant come. I sent out the save the date 6 months ago and he and his wife were so thrilled to come, and now he's like, "Im moving that weekend". OK. I guess Im feeling a bit like a selfish bridezilla here, but i am feeling like no one cares we are getting married. i know thats probably not true.

anyone feel like this at all? its really taking away from my excitement!

 

[Jelly]

I''m so sorry to hear about the no-shows! Don''t feel bad about being a bridezilla, I''d be furious with so many people backing out.

On the other hand, I hope that you are able to fully enjoy your wedding and appreciate all the people who will be there on your special day! Don''t let the no-shows get you down! It''s their loss they are missing out on the party!

When is your date? We''ll all be waiting with excitement for your stories and pictures!!

By the way, I love your ring!

Stephanie

 

[MissAva]

Oh that sucks! I am sorry you are having such a hard time, I imagine that up your level of stress about final head counts and what not. Poor thing.

 

[jellybean]

Welcome to the wonderful world of wedding stress! Every bride I have talked to (friends, family members) has been totally bummed about the no-show or decline rate. Heck, even with my own wedding there were certain friends of mine that didn''t make the wedding that I was like "you have got to be kidding!". I also had friends respond that they would come then never show up! It is unfortunately part of the territory. Yeah, it makes you feel like crap but you do need to focus on who IS coming or who did come to your shower/bachelorette party.

It seems like everyone is so busy all the time. There will never be a date that everyone you want to be there will be there. Try to not let it bother you. When the wedding is here, you will not be concerned at all for who didn''t make it.

One of my friends didn''t come to my wedding b/c that weekend was the annual drum and bugle corps championship (even though he isn''t in the corps) and he goes every year with his brother. When I booked my wedding I obviously didn''t know it was that weekend but at the time it really hurt that he chose to attend that instead of my wedding. On the actual wedding day, I was so busy anyway that I probably wouldn''t have been able to spend more than 30 seconds saying hi to him anyway.

 

[selflove]

BIG HUGS to you punch n'' pie!! I can imagine how hurt you must feel--I would be going through the same feelings if the people I most wanted there couldn''t make it. Some people just don''t get how important it is to us that they are there. Maybe they have no idea you hold them in such high esteem. Keep your chin up!

 

[flopkins]

Pnp - just remember that what''s most important is that you are celebrating that day with your FI and you will enjoy your wedding day with the people who care most about you!!!

and, at least the people who aren''t able to make it and RSVP take the time to RSVP!! It''s even worse if they don''t reply at all... and have to be tracked down!

and, - at least you can save money on the catering... (I hope! )

I know, not really that exciting, but hey... I can''t help but think that''s a plus!

 

[glaucomflecken]

Thanks girls! I looked through my "yes" list and wow, people I didnt expect to come at all are coming. So I am gonna party it up with those people and they will truly be special in my heart!

That IS true about the catering bill...maybe I can buy some more diamonds with the money we will save...

 

[MelissaSue]

oh no!! Thats terrible! I think I''d be really heartbroken and depressed if that happened to me too! I guess you just have to try to not let it get to you, but i totally understand your disappointment! ((HUGS))

 

[Odilia]

I feel for you. The same thing happened to me. It seemed like so many "for sure" people didn''t come, but then there were some surprising ones who did come, that I wouldn''t have expected, like my 92 year old aunt from out-of-town. Some folks who didn''t come had better excuses than others. And likewise with other wedding planning stuff - people who you hoped would support you were not as supportive, but others from unexpected quarters were helpful. So at least I can tell you you''re not alone!

 

[Mara]

Their loss if they don''t come, right?!

Focus on those that are coming and just have a great time! It''s about you and your FI in the end...so just party it up and eat all the cake yourself!! YAY. CAKE!

 

[gingerBcookie]

The less guests show up:

1) the more time you can spend with each person who DOES show up, making it more special with each of them

2) the smaller the catering bill [$$)] -- i.e. faster upgrade/more diamonds or honeymoon splurge!!
3) the more cake to go around

YUM

TOTALLY their loss.

 

[glaucomflecken]

oooh i hadnt even thought of that...more cake for me!!! MMMMM caaakkkeee (a la Homer Simpson)

you girls are the best. thanks for the support!

 

[fountainfairfax]

When I got married the first time, one thing I remember my boss-at-the-time telling me was "this is a huge event in your life and for those closest to you. Don''t be offended if a lot of people you call friends and some extended family just don''t feel the same way." This was mentioned after her daughter attended a wedding where half the envited guests didn''t attend (it was a holiday weekend, if I remember correctly.)


I agree with everyone else and say make the best of the situation and make your event even more personal & intimate & eat all the cake you want!!!!