Getting married twice!

[cindygenit]

Hi guys,

Any of you doing this? I have LOTS of family overseas in Indonesia, and my FI and I have decided that we are going to have a traditional wedding ceremony in Indonesia first, with all my family (and relatives and neighbours) and his immediate family will fly over to see us get married there.

Our second wedding will be here in Perth, and this wedding will be mostly for his relatives and my friends who can''t make it to the first wedding.

So, i was just wondering, since we are already married, do we need to get a celebrant to marry us again? Any help will be appreciated.

TIA!

 

[04diamond<3]

I don''t think you HAVE to, especially if you dont want to. I think the people that weren''t at the first one would enjoy it, but it''s your wedding. Having another big party could be fun!

I know two days after our wedding, I wanted to do it all over again

but that''s just me....It''s your decision, I know family can put pressure on you, but don''t do it if you dont want to...good luck with your decision!!!!

 

[cindygenit]

I know it has to be fun, and it will be! The first one will be an alcohol-free wedding

and my FI is not too happy about this part LOL

I'm just wondering if we CAN get married again, since technically, we already will be.

If a wedding celebrant is not really necessary, then maybe i can just get a family member to read a poem and then "pretend" marry us? It will save us a few hundred dollars...

 

[honey22]

You could have a vow renewal ceremony, as you will already be married (I am assuming that your Indonesian marriage would be recognised in Australia?).

You basically have the same ceremony, but you are reaffirming your vows and renewing your vows, instead of making them again. It''s quite common for couples in your situation.

Then you get to have the big party all over again! It''s nice for your guests to see you make your vows again too.

 

[cindygenit]

Date: 7/13/2009 10:59:10 PM
Author: honey22
You could have a vow renewal ceremony, as you will already be married (I am assuming that your Indonesian marriage would be recognised in Australia?).

You basically have the same ceremony, but you are reaffirming your vows and renewing your vows, instead of making them again. It''s quite common for couples in your situation.

Then you get to have the big party all over again! It''s nice for your guests to see you make your vows again too.

I have NO idea as well. Who is the relevant authority I could ask to confirm this?

 

[honey22]

I wouldn''t be exactly sure, but I would start with Births, Deaths and Marriages Australia, and go from there maybe?

You live in Perth don''t you? These are state offices:

http://www.bdm.dotag.wa.gov.au/

 

[cleokizzy]

you could check with the Indonesian embassy to verify, or just go online - I''m pretty sure they have a website somewhere.

you can definitely have another wedding! but the 2nd time would be a renewal of vows since your already married. me & FI are planning to have one too bec we have a lot of relatives that are unable to fly international.

 

[honey22]

http://www.bdm.dotag.wa.gov.au/o/overseas_marriages.aspx

Here is the page which outlines what you need to do if you are getting married outside Australia.

 

[cindygenit]

Thanks honey and cleo, i emailed the indonesian consulate in Perth about this. They shoulg get back to me soon.

Since FI is dead set on having a vor renewal, i suppose the celebrant cost is unavoidable. Thanks again guys!

xxCindy

 

[jstarfireb]

I''m doing this, but both in the US. He''s Chinese-American, and his family requires him to have a traditional Chinese banquet in Chinatown NYC. However, that''s not a legal wedding ceremony, only a reception (those who do it as their only wedding usually get legally married at a courthouse, city hall, etc.). It''s not really a vow renewal as we won''t be saying vows. So I''m just thinking of it as an awesome 1st anniversary party. We had our regular "white" wedding in May. We weren''t able to fit the Chinese one in with the limited time off we had for our American wedding 2 months ago, so we''re in the process of finding a date some time next summer. We''re hoping to make it somewhat close to our first anniversary. His brother was able to fit both in together, just a week apart.

 

[hawaiianorangetree]

Date: 7/13/2009 11:02:36 PM
Author: cindygenit

Date: 7/13/2009 10:59:10 PM
Author: honey22
You could have a vow renewal ceremony, as you will already be married (I am assuming that your Indonesian marriage would be recognised in Australia?).

You basically have the same ceremony, but you are reaffirming your vows and renewing your vows, instead of making them again. It''s quite common for couples in your situation.

Then you get to have the big party all over again! It''s nice for your guests to see you make your vows again too.

I have NO idea as well. Who is the relevant authority I could ask to confirm this?

If getting married in Indonesia is anything like Bali it will be easy peasy.

You need to be married under one of the 4 recongnised religions, you will have to have 2 ceremonies (1 religious and 1 goverment which happen one after the other) and you have to visit the relevant ''official place'' when in Indo to get the official paperwork organised a few days before hand and then it will be officially recognised in Australia.

If you google something along the lines of ''indonesian wedding planner'' there is soooo much info about that will tell you more about the official side of things.

I would do your vows back in Australia if it was me, why not celebrate twice when you have the opportunity! It would be nice for FI''s family and your friends to get to see the commitment too.

2 weddings!! Lucky girl!!

 

[cindygenit]

Date: 7/14/2009 4:42:52 AM
Author: hawaiianorangetree

Date: 7/13/2009 11:02:36 PM
Author: cindygenit

Date: 7/13/2009 10:59:10 PM
Author: honey22
You could have a vow renewal ceremony, as you will already be married (I am assuming that your Indonesian marriage would be recognised in Australia?).

You basically have the same ceremony, but you are reaffirming your vows and renewing your vows, instead of making them again. It''s quite common for couples in your situation.

Then you get to have the big party all over again! It''s nice for your guests to see you make your vows again too.

I have NO idea as well. Who is the relevant authority I could ask to confirm this?

If getting married in Indonesia is anything like Bali it will be easy peasy.

You need to be married under one of the 4 recongnised religions, you will have to have 2 ceremonies (1 religious and 1 goverment which happen one after the other) and you have to visit the relevant ''official place'' when in Indo to get the official paperwork organised a few days before hand and then it will be officially recognised in Australia.

If you google something along the lines of ''indonesian wedding planner'' there is soooo much info about that will tell you more about the official side of things.

I would do your vows back in Australia if it was me, why not celebrate twice when you have the opportunity! It would be nice for FI''s family and your friends to get to see the commitment too.

2 weddings!! Lucky girl!!

Wow highlighter galore! LOL

Umm Question: Does it mean that I can get married in Aus first, and THEN remarry in Indo? Can i do that? Hmmm the previous posters talked about vow renewals... i''m all confused...

Please share how i can do this!! i would like his relatives to see us marry too, instead of just a renewal.

 

[hawaiianorangetree]

Date: 7/14/2009 4:48:55 AM
Author: cindygenit

Date: 7/14/2009 4:42:52 AM
Author: hawaiianorangetree

Date: 7/13/2009 11:02:36 PM
Author: cindygenit

Date: 7/13/2009 10:59:10 PM
Author: honey22
You could have a vow renewal ceremony, as you will already be married (I am assuming that your Indonesian marriage would be recognised in Australia?).

You basically have the same ceremony, but you are reaffirming your vows and renewing your vows, instead of making them again. It''s quite common for couples in your situation.

Then you get to have the big party all over again! It''s nice for your guests to see you make your vows again too.

I have NO idea as well. Who is the relevant authority I could ask to confirm this?

If getting married in Indonesia is anything like Bali it will be easy peasy.

You need to be married under one of the 4 recongnised religions, you will have to have 2 ceremonies (1 religious and 1 goverment which happen one after the other) and you have to visit the relevant ''official place'' when in Indo to get the official paperwork organised a few days before hand and then it will be officially recognised in Australia.

If you google something along the lines of ''indonesian wedding planner'' there is soooo much info about that will tell you more about the official side of things.

I would do your vows back in Australia if it was me, why not celebrate twice when you have the opportunity! It would be nice for FI''s family and your friends to get to see the commitment too.

2 weddings!! Lucky girl!!

Wow highlighter galore! LOL

Umm Question: Does it mean that I can get married in Aus first, and THEN remarry in Indo? Can i do that? Hmmm the previous posters talked about vow renewals... i''m all confused...

Please share how i can do this!! i would like his relatives to see us marry too, instead of just a renewal.

i''ll abstain from using the highlighter.

To me it''s exactly the same thing as far as the ceremony goes except you don''t have the paperwork? So all the words and everything you say to each other is the same for a ''real'' wedding and for a vow renewal, you just don''t have the official document to go with it. (that''s how i think it goes, doesn''t mean i am right though). I''m pretty sure that you can only have 1 ''official'' wedding, (who would want to pay for 2 lots of official documents if you don''t need to?) (and you could always ''fake'' signing a certificate for friends and family here!!) I think you need to decide where you want to have the ''official'' ceremony, here, or Indonesia? I think after some research on your part you might find that one is alot easier to organise than the other... or cheaper? (i think Bali was $150 US for all official paperwork) Not too sure what it costs here.
I know in Bali you can have a priest do a ceremony, but you don''t have the goverment ceremony or the paperwork, so it''s not legal, more symbolic, and you can do the same thing here.

I hope i haven''t confused you too much.

 

[justginger]

I don''t know anything about the legalities, but I think having two weddings would be fantastic! If (ahem, when) my partner and I come to that time, we''ll be on the "two weddings bandwagon" as well. I''m American (living in Perth, with you!) and he''s Australian, so we''ve discussing having one in both places. If it we were an Aus/NZ couple or something, we would like family members to come over to just one ceremony, but with family on literally the other side of the world, it''s a big ask!

Plus I can''t think of anything better than planning a second wedding!

An excuse to look gorgeously fabulous TWICE? Yes, please.

 

[cleokizzy]

Date: 7/14/2009 8:15:36 AM
Author: justginger
I don''t know anything about the legalities, but I think having two weddings would be fantastic! If (ahem, when) my partner and I come to that time, we''ll be on the ''two weddings bandwagon'' as well. I''m American (living in Perth, with you!) and he''s Australian, so we''ve discussing having one in both places. If it we were an Aus/NZ couple or something, we would like family members to come over to just one ceremony, but with family on literally the other side of the world, it''s a big ask!


Plus I can''t think of anything better than planning a second wedding!

An excuse to look gorgeously fabulous TWICE? Yes, please.

DITTO! Can''t think of any perfect excuse to be a princess all over again!

 

[cindygenit]

Date: 7/14/2009 5:02:50 AM
Author: hawaiianorangetree

Date: 7/14/2009 4:48:55 AM
Author: cindygenit

Date: 7/14/2009 4:42:52 AM
Author: hawaiianorangetree

Date: 7/13/2009 11:02:36 PM
Author: cindygenit

Date: 7/13/2009 10:59:10 PM
Author: honey22
You could have a vow renewal ceremony, as you will already be married (I am assuming that your Indonesian marriage would be recognised in Australia?).

You basically have the same ceremony, but you are reaffirming your vows and renewing your vows, instead of making them again. It''s quite common for couples in your situation.

Then you get to have the big party all over again! It''s nice for your guests to see you make your vows again too.

I have NO idea as well. Who is the relevant authority I could ask to confirm this?

If getting married in Indonesia is anything like Bali it will be easy peasy.

You need to be married under one of the 4 recongnised religions, you will have to have 2 ceremonies (1 religious and 1 goverment which happen one after the other) and you have to visit the relevant ''official place'' when in Indo to get the official paperwork organised a few days before hand and then it will be officially recognised in Australia.

If you google something along the lines of ''indonesian wedding planner'' there is soooo much info about that will tell you more about the official side of things.

I would do your vows back in Australia if it was me, why not celebrate twice when you have the opportunity! It would be nice for FI''s family and your friends to get to see the commitment too.

2 weddings!! Lucky girl!!

Wow highlighter galore! LOL

Umm Question: Does it mean that I can get married in Aus first, and THEN remarry in Indo? Can i do that? Hmmm the previous posters talked about vow renewals... i''m all confused...

Please share how i can do this!! i would like his relatives to see us marry too, instead of just a renewal.

i''ll abstain from using the highlighter.

To me it''s exactly the same thing as far as the ceremony goes except you don''t have the paperwork? So all the words and everything you say to each other is the same for a ''real'' wedding and for a vow renewal, you just don''t have the official document to go with it. (that''s how i think it goes, doesn''t mean i am right though). I''m pretty sure that you can only have 1 ''official'' wedding, (who would want to pay for 2 lots of official documents if you don''t need to?) (and you could always ''fake'' signing a certificate for friends and family here!!) I think you need to decide where you want to have the ''official'' ceremony, here, or Indonesia? I think after some research on your part you might find that one is alot easier to organise than the other... or cheaper? (i think Bali was $150 US for all official paperwork) Not too sure what it costs here.
I know in Bali you can have a priest do a ceremony, but you don''t have the goverment ceremony or the paperwork, so it''s not legal, more symbolic, and you can do the same thing here.

I hope i haven''t confused you too much.

Ok that''s cool! I need to go to the deaths marriages and blah blah authority and ask them about this further

I think it might be easier to get officially married in indonesia.

Justginger and cleokizzy, thanks for the input! You guys are making me doubly excited for my double wedding!!!! yeayyyy i will post pics of my traditional dress when its made

 

[hawaiianorangetree]

Date: 7/14/2009 9:23:17 PM
Author: cindygenit

Date: 7/14/2009 5:02:50 AM
Author: hawaiianorangetree

Date: 7/14/2009 4:48:55 AM
Author: cindygenit

Date: 7/14/2009 4:42:52 AM
Author: hawaiianorangetree

Date: 7/13/2009 11:02:36 PM
Author: cindygenit

Date: 7/13/2009 10:59:10 PM
Author: honey22
You could have a vow renewal ceremony, as you will already be married (I am assuming that your Indonesian marriage would be recognised in Australia?).

You basically have the same ceremony, but you are reaffirming your vows and renewing your vows, instead of making them again. It''s quite common for couples in your situation.

Then you get to have the big party all over again! It''s nice for your guests to see you make your vows again too.

I have NO idea as well. Who is the relevant authority I could ask to confirm this?

If getting married in Indonesia is anything like Bali it will be easy peasy.

You need to be married under one of the 4 recongnised religions, you will have to have 2 ceremonies (1 religious and 1 goverment which happen one after the other) and you have to visit the relevant ''official place'' when in Indo to get the official paperwork organised a few days before hand and then it will be officially recognised in Australia.

If you google something along the lines of ''indonesian wedding planner'' there is soooo much info about that will tell you more about the official side of things.

I would do your vows back in Australia if it was me, why not celebrate twice when you have the opportunity! It would be nice for FI''s family and your friends to get to see the commitment too.

2 weddings!! Lucky girl!!

Wow highlighter galore! LOL

Umm Question: Does it mean that I can get married in Aus first, and THEN remarry in Indo? Can i do that? Hmmm the previous posters talked about vow renewals... i''m all confused...

Please share how i can do this!! i would like his relatives to see us marry too, instead of just a renewal.

i''ll abstain from using the highlighter.

To me it''s exactly the same thing as far as the ceremony goes except you don''t have the paperwork? So all the words and everything you say to each other is the same for a ''real'' wedding and for a vow renewal, you just don''t have the official document to go with it. (that''s how i think it goes, doesn''t mean i am right though). I''m pretty sure that you can only have 1 ''official'' wedding, (who would want to pay for 2 lots of official documents if you don''t need to?) (and you could always ''fake'' signing a certificate for friends and family here!!) I think you need to decide where you want to have the ''official'' ceremony, here, or Indonesia? I think after some research on your part you might find that one is alot easier to organise than the other... or cheaper? (i think Bali was $150 US for all official paperwork) Not too sure what it costs here.
I know in Bali you can have a priest do a ceremony, but you don''t have the goverment ceremony or the paperwork, so it''s not legal, more symbolic, and you can do the same thing here.

I hope i haven''t confused you too much.

Ok that''s cool! I need to go to the deaths marriages and blah blah authority and ask them about this further

I think it might be easier to get officially married in indonesia.

Justginger and cleokizzy, thanks for the input! You guys are making me doubly excited for my double wedding!!!! yeayyyy i will post pics of my traditional dress when its made

You get to have 2 dresses???????

 

[cindygenit]

Yes... yes i do Weeeeeeeeeeee

 

[choro72]

We're doing it! We're officially married already, and since neither of us are religious, we don't need an officiant to marry us anymore. But I still want to walk down the aisle for both weddings, so in Japan we're going have my cousin marry us in front of everyone. Ring exchange and everything. In the US, we still don't know who will marry us but neither of them need to be ordained.
Question for you. Which will be your anniversary? We have the day we officially got married at the courthouse, Japan, or the US. The funny thing is, by the time we get to the US wedding it will already be more than a year after our official marriage. So depending on which day we celebrate, we might have our wedding in the US AFTER our first year anniversary

ETA: VERY jealous about your two dresses. I wish I could

 

[cindygenit]

I think our anniversary will be the one in Perth...

I''m very excited about my dress as well, hopefully its not the FULL-ON traditional dress