Gift Bags are expected aren''t they??? Whine

[Gypsy]

I have to say I''m not into the whole making gift bags for folks thing. I know we''ll have OOT guests, and I''ll do it. It''s just another expense for me, and not even one that I find reasonably fun.

I think I just wanted to whine. WHINE WHINE WHINE!

 

[goldenstar]

Are they expected? If so thats news to me. Oh no, do I have to do them too?

I always thought they were more for true destination weddings, like if you''re all flying to Hawaii or something.

 

[gtn]

Gift bags are not expected. At least I don''t expect them.

 

[Selkie]

Expected? I don''t think so...I never received one at a wedding, nor did I make them. They seem to be sort of a recent fad. Well, fad sounds derogatory, since they are a nice idea, but I don''t see a lot of point in doing them if you''re not into it. Or maybe just do them for your immediate family/closest friends that are OOT?

 

[partyjewels]

If I had the money I''d love to do it, it''s a nice little gesture for those loved ones who had to make an extra effort to attend your wedding. However, we don''t really have extra money floating around for something like that, and how do you determine whats out of town? People who need to fly in? People from another State? People who are more than 3 hours away? I''d go nuts!

 

[musey]

I''ve been to 4 OOT weddings and never got a gift bag. I feel so gypped!

Nah, they''re not expected. At least I don''t ever expect one. If I hadn''t participated in wedding planning boards I never would''ve thought of it. Do it if you have the extra budget and you think it will be fun, otherwise don''t bother!

 

[neatfreak]

If they''re expected, that''s news to me!!!!

 

[Gypsy]

OK. NOT DOING THEM. You all decided it for me. YAY!

 

[zoebartlett]

Okay, I have an idea. How about you work on the flowers and color scheme for my wedding, and I''ll do the gift bags for yours? That''s what I''m in the middle of doing right now and it''s kind of fun.

 

[zoebartlett]

Oh yeah, there's no NEED to do them. We're just having a lot of out of town family and guests and I thought I'd put together a little something for them. I've gotten them at most out of town weddings I've attended and I've appreciated them. I would never expect one though and there's no need to do them if you're not up for it.

 

[swimmer]

I''m not doing a "gift bag" per se, but more like an info bag. We went to a tourist center and got tons of brochures about local attractions (with coupons and photos), colorful maps, and I''m putting together google maps with little details about fave spots (takes no time at all online).

I sort of feel like I have to do this though, since I''m making everyone travel across the country. Also, I just hate it when people insult my hometown so I want folks to see that there is so much to do there...other than cow-tip or whatever NYC people think we do in TN. Though I am sticking in a moon pie, Elvis'' fave.

So, I guess Gypsy that I''m doing it out of a bit of guilt and a desire to show off my hometown (or deflect whining of how there is nothing to do there). If you think folks can get around on their own, I don''t think its necessary, but we have gotten them in the past and thought it was super sweet.

 

[designchica]

I''ve never heard of such a thing but I love it!!! This will be so much fun!

 

[Gypsy]

We''ve gotten them at some. And then not at others. Zoe. I just think it''s a very lovely touch when I receive the gifts.


But I''m still not doing it. LOL.

 

[brazen_irish_hussy]

I am not doing them. With one possible exception, all my OOT guests either used to live here or visit so often they know the area as well as I do.

If you are not doing them, perhaps you could put info about the area on your website so they can still access it without you going to extra trouble and expense.

 

[Gypsy]

Date: 2/27/2008 6:06:18 PM
Author: brazen_irish_hussy
I am not doing them. With one possible exception, all my OOT guests either used to live here or visit so often they know the area as well as I do.

If you are not doing them, perhaps you could put info about the area on your website so they can still access it without you going to extra trouble and expense.

It''s already on the website. John put it up yesterday. The link is on our save the dates. So travel, local information is covered. It''s just the bottles of water, cookies, and local delicacies that I''m opting out of .

 

[Tacori E-ring]

Don''t worry about it. We did do them but we had fun with them and everyone seemed surprised. I would never think it is expected!

 

[Maisie]

Date: 2/27/2008 6:01:41 PM
Author: Gypsy
We''ve gotten them at some. And then not at others. Zoe. I just think it''s a very lovely touch when I receive the gifts.


But I''m still not doing it. LOL.

 

[HollyS]

Date: 2/27/2008 4:31:10 PM
Author:Gypsy
I have to say I''m not into the whole making gift bags for folks thing. I know we''ll have OOT guests, and I''ll do it. It''s just another expense for me, and not even one that I find reasonably fun.

I think I just wanted to whine. WHINE WHINE WHINE!

If they were expected, then my guest were really disappointed!!

Do what you want. The way you want. No matter what. Even if it POs some people. Maybe especially if it POs some people.

Everybody, listen up. . . . . . it''s your wedding. Throw the damn magazines and how-to books in the trash. Take a deep breath. Relax already. Geez.

 

[LegacyGirl]

Date: 2/27/2008 4:53:51 PM
Author: musey
I''ve been to 4 OOT weddings and never got a gift bag. I feel so gypped!

Nah, they''re not expected. At least I don''t ever expect one. If I hadn''t participated in wedding planning boards I never would''ve thought of it. Do it if you have the extra budget and you think it will be fun, otherwise don''t bother!

Ok now that was funny!!

 

[IWantAMilkshake]

I''ve been an OOT guest for about 10 weddings in the last three years, and we got gift bags in all but one, and at that one, I admit, we were a little disappointed. Mostly because the couple had not even left a detailed schedule so we knew what was going on--for example, we had no idea what time the shuttles were coming to pick us up from our hotel.

I think it''s incredibly sweet and inexpensive to put together a bag with tourist brochures (free from the local chamber of commerce), a map, a detailed schedule, a thank you note, a bottle of water, advil, and mints/gum. We''re also including snacks and a CD (FI is so excited about putting together the CD). And remember you only need one per couple, and only for those staying at your hotels.

A very nice touch, incredibly appreciated, but definitely not expected.

 

[Gypsy]

Date: 2/27/2008 8:15:30 PM
Author: IWantAMilkshake
I''ve been an OOT guest for about 10 weddings in the last three years, and we got gift bags in all but one, and at that one, I admit, we were a little disappointed. Mostly because the couple had not even left a detailed schedule so we knew what was going on--for example, we had no idea what time the shuttles were coming to pick us up from our hotel.

I think it''s incredibly sweet and inexpensive to put together a bag with tourist brochures (free from the local chamber of commerce), a map, a detailed schedule, a thank you note, a bottle of water, advil, and mints/gum. We''re also including snacks and a CD (FI is so excited about putting together the CD). And remember you only need one per couple, and only for those staying at your hotels.

A very nice touch, incredibly appreciated, but definitely not expected.

It is only for the guests staying at the hotel, granted. But that means it''s only for FI''s family. Because MY family''s OOT guest will be staying in our homes. So, yeah. It''s a lovely thoughtful touch.

Still not expected. Still not doing it.

 

[surfgirl]

Gypsy, I imagine wedding guests could also be saying, "Are wedding gifts expected?" And if you expect a wedding gift, I think it''s appropriate, and considerate, to give a small trinket because let''s be honest, travel to/from a wedding, including travel costs and purchasing an outfit if need be, plus a wedding gift does add up very quickly. At the wedding, a favor is quite typical in my experience and can be anything from some nice chocolate, some local cookies, etc. It doesn''t have to be expensive and you can buy such things already bagged and ready to go. As for welcome basket type things for OOT guests, I think it''s a very nice, thoughful gesture to provide perhaps a bottle of wine, something munchie, a local map, lists of things to do if they''ll have free time, something like that. Again, you can have them made up already so you dont have to DIY.

 

[Gypsy]

Surfgirl, I appreciate the point. But honestly, I've giving nice favors. And I've been to weddings without favors before too. And I've had invites mailed with registry info. As long as it's not an ettiquete rule, I'm not inclined to do it... especially if it costs time, energy, and potential conflict (why are you doing it for the HOTEL guests and not for ALL the OOT guests). Heck no. I've already been considerate, IMO of my guests and if a couple bottles of water, a bottle of tylenol, two packs of gum and 4 cookies is going to disgruntle them, oh well. Pre-made means EXPENSIVE. DIY is affordable but a PITA.

For me that's a)15 gift bags b)30 bottles of water c) 15 bottles of tylenol, 30 packs of gum and 60 cookies plus the time shopping and assembling and driving them over to the hotel. I will say this. Plus the expense. I'm already planning a wedding, my own shower, and my own 'hen night'. This is not a requirement, and it's not being added to the to do list.

 

[violet02]

We''re doing the ''info packet'' thing too. A list of local things to see and do, maps, guides etc. Packaged up nicely. We can''t really afford to do much more since every single guest at our wedding is coming from out of town. The cost just goes through the roof.

 

[Independent Gal]

I definitely don''t think that they''re expected. Nope!

 

[iheartscience]

Another don''t do it! I''ve been to several out of town weddings and I''ve never received a gift bag and never felt slighted, either! I think the gift bag thing is a new idea brought to you by the bridal industry so you can spend even more $!

 

[Fancy605]

I agree. They are not expected. I have received one at some weddings and not at others. I actually didn''t make them for my wedding. However, we ended up having them anyway because my mother LOVES that sort of thing, and she took it upon herself to make them. She asked if I would like that, and I said, "sure, whatever" and magically gift baskets containing both generic items (bottled water, chocolates, etc) and even some personal touches specific to the guests'' likes and personalities (specific travel candle scents, bottles of wine, etc) arrived in the hotel rooms. My mom really goes all out. She even made special gift boxes for each of my bridesmaids containing useful little things.

Anyway, were I left to my own devices, I probably would have skipped this step unless it was something REALLY generic and easy to do. But, I will admit that in hindsight, the baskets were a really nice touch.

 

[lovehersomuch]

i think my gf and i will probably not do the whole wedding favor idea and instead have some type of gift for our immediate families... this may be more of a cultural thing..