Gifting jwewelry to children

[DiamanteBlu]

What criteria would you use to determine when [or even whether] to gift major pieces of jewelry [or art, etc.] to a child? I know few of you have children in their 20''s, 30''s or older and I would appreciate your feedback. I would also love to hear feedback from those of you that are the age of the potential inheritors.

Thanks.

 

[Tacori E-ring]

I think it depends on the child. I have every piece of nice jewelry my parents ever gave me. My older sister on the other hand used to lose or misplace a lot of important things (including the diamond ring my mom gave her when she was 16 that was given to my mom by my grandparents when she was 16). If my DD is like me I think she will get her first diamond (of some sort) at 16. Then who knows. I like to celebrate milestones so maybe high school graduation, college graduation, wedding day, etc...

 

[DiamanteBlu]

OK, how do you fix typos in the title of the thread?!? LOL!

 

[MichelleCarmen]

ETA - Ooops, I may have misread. Do you mean buying new items as gifts or passing on heirlooms?


If heirloom: My criteria would be that the adult child have a stable job or source of income, doesn't do drugs/drink and isn't in a volatile relationship where the guy could run off with the goods! My mom gave me most of her jewelry when I was around 27ish including her eng. diamond. She moved to Europe on a whim and when she got there sent me all her stuff! Unfortunely, I never wear any of the pieces and did reset the eng. diamond and have worn it less than 20 times since then. I guess there were strings attached to everything. I doubt that is the case with you,

, but still it's important to think clearly about the reasons you're passing items on and if the timing is right.

 

[DiamanteBlu]

Thanks for the feedback. Unfortunately, just about everything my family had was wiped out during the last two world wars [we are from northern Italy] - jewelry, furniture, art, homes, everything, so I have no family heirlooms.

I do, however have some pieces that I have acquired myself and one that my mom gave me. I have a couple that are "important" but I do not wear them regularly [my 6.39 carat EC, for instance]. I am wondering whether I should even consider giving it to DD [who very clearly does not appreciate it yet - don''t get me startd on the negative feedback about me from my ex] or whether I should just reset it, wear it as a RHR and worry about it later. The art work can hang out at my house and the museums where it is currently parked, I guess.

I guess this is not a real urgent question [unless I were to be hit by a truck or something in the near term]. But what if something does happen to me? Maybe I should have everything DH doesn''t need [care about] revert to a trust for later dissemination?

Dunno.

 

[DiamanteBlu]

MC - I meant heirlooms - not new stuff.
D.

 

[MichelleCarmen]

Reset the stone. If there is any issue with your DD it wouldn''t be logical to give it to her now (especially if there is negativity issues). Having a trust set up is a good idea. . . and possibly have it set up to give your pieces to a grandaughter, niece, or another relative.

 

[steph72276]

I think 16 is a good age if they are responsible...
This thread reminded me of a story from when I was teaching kindergarten. I was in an uppity private school where the parents were pay $15k a year for their kids to go to school. This little girl walks in the day after her birthday and shows me some diamond earrings (probably 1/2 carat or so total) then she said "aren''t they pretty? And they''re upgradable!!!!" I laughed so hard...found it ridiculous for a 5 year old, but thought that girl is a future pricescoper!

 

[merrymunky]

Date: 1/3/2009 7:47:19 PM
Author: steph72276
I think 16 is a good age if they are responsible...
This thread reminded me of a story from when I was teaching kindergarten. I was in an uppity private school where the parents were pay $15k a year for their kids to go to school. This little girl walks in the day after her birthday and shows me some diamond earrings (probably 1/2 carat or so total) then she said ''aren''t they pretty? And they''re upgradable!!!!'' I laughed so hard...found it ridiculous for a 5 year old, but thought that girl is a future pricescoper!

Oh dear Lord!

At 5 years old I was happy with my yellow plastic watch!!

 

[Maisie]

I don''t have any heirloom pieces but If I did I wouldn''t be comfortable giving them to my girls until they were at least 21. I would want to be sure they were mature enough to value the significance of the piece before I would pass it on to them.

My eldest daughter is 16 next month. She is mature for her age but not enough for something so special.

 

[Tacori E-ring]

A will! That is what you need my dear. If you are worried what will happen to your treasures when you are gone. If you would enjoy your EC (and you don''t want to send it to me

) reset that baby into something you would enjoy. It would look killer as an east-west pendant!

 

[IloveAsschers13]

Hello-

I''m newly 21, and I highly appreciate jewelry. Unfortunately my parents never really had any money, same with my grandparents, so they don''t have any really nice jewelry (like the BEAUTIFUL 6+ EC, which I am in love with). But I think it would be special to pass things down during big events, like weddings, having children, having a huge milestone such as a graduation. Also, make sure your children/grandchildren/godchildren know how important the jewelry is to you. Let them know the story behind it and how much it means to you. That might make them understand a lot more

 

[~*Alexis*~]

Date: 1/3/2009 6:54:48 PM
Author: DiamanteBlu
Thanks for the feedback. Unfortunately, just about everything my family had was wiped out during the last two world wars [we are from northern Italy] - jewelry, furniture, art, homes, everything, so I have no family heirlooms.


I do, however have some pieces that I have acquired myself and one that my mom gave me. I have a couple that are ''important'' but I do not wear them regularly [my 6.39 carat EC, for instance]. I am wondering whether I should even consider giving it to DD [who very clearly does not appreciate it yet - don''t get me startd on the negative feedback about me from my ex] or whether I should just reset it, wear it as a RHR and worry about it later. The art work can hang out at my house and the museums where it is currently parked, I guess.


I guess this is not a real urgent question [unless I were to be hit by a truck or something in the near term]. But what if something does happen to me? Maybe I should have everything DH doesn''t need [care about] revert to a trust for later dissemination?


Dunno.

If you can prove some of the artifacts are yours after the wars and you know where those pieces are, then you could recover them through the government (if you are wanting them back that is)


I think if you are going to give something away than you need to give it to someone who is old enough and mature enough to understand the significance of owning such a piece. If it is a relative or not.

For me I have 2 step kids....at this point...they are getting nothing...until they can prove that they are worthy of my pieces....

 

[Kaleigh]

My DD just got my Diamond studs from WF. She''s 20 and inherited my love for jewelry. She''s very responsible. But DS knows quality, and appreciates my jewelry too. Many pieces that were handed down to me will go to DD, because that is tradition. But some pieces will go to DS, so will break a few rules there too. I want it to be even. Good thing is that they don''t want the same pieces, so it will all work out.

Good luck to you, resetting it sounds like a great idea.

 

[DiamanteBlu]

We have a few of our things - what could be carried. Little jewelry and virtually no art - and, I'm told, there was considerable wealth. Other stuff "disappeared". The rest was bombed [by the Americans! LOL! Go figure!].

I guess I'm most possessive about my jewelry - the stuff I bought myself. In particular, my EC. The best pic of it is the 5th pic down, I think here.
DD is graduating college in 2010 but I think that such a big diamond piece is a bit much for that achievement. I am thinking of a nice ~$10kish pink sapphire ring with diamond halo - posted in another thread to reward the graduation. [Or maybe she should get me something since I paid the tuition at Syracuse - no small fee - LOL!]

 

[DiamanteBlu]

Date: 1/3/2009 8:14:39 PM
Author: Kaleigh
My DD just got my Diamond studs from WF. She''s 20 and inherited my love for jewelry. She''s very responsible. But DS knows quality, and appreciates my jewelry too. Many pieces that were handed down to me will go to DD, because that is tradition. But some pieces will go to DS, so will break a few rules there too. I want it to be even. Good thing is that they don''t want the same pieces, so it will all work out.


Good luck to you, resetting it sounds like a great idea.

I have bought her some nice pieces and expect to get her a great piece [pink sapphire halo ring] for her college graduation.

I think I will reset the EC to use it myself and have a trust dictate its disposition in the case of my untimely demise.

 

[that_someone_special]

When they are old enough to:

1) Appreciate it
2) Know the value of a dollar
3) Take care of it
4) If it''s worthy of insuring, that they insure it
and
5) I''m on my death bed.... jk.... maybe.... you''ll have to pry these diamonds from my cold, dead, hands!!

 

[jewelerman]

Im glad you are thinking about these items before you pass on...please reset the diamond and wear it ,wear it ,wear it!...Because i dont have children i will leave my jewelry,art ect to my twin sister and certain family members...many pieces will be left to close friends who i know will appreciate them as i did in life...just because someone is family dosnt mean they will inherit my jewelry just to sell it.Discussions like this always remind me to wear my jewelry and not let it sit in boxes waiting for the right time or occassions to enjoy it....Im too careful with my jewelry and dont wear it like I should...i used to head up an estate jewelry program for a major department store and a few older women consigned their collections so their spoiled chilren wouldnt fight over the pieces when they passed on...or even worse ....sell the pieces off for partying or drug money...
you are smart to plan for your jewelry''s future care and well being

 

[Brown.Eyed.Girl]

Reset your EC! I think the pink sapphire''s going to be a beautiful present for your daughter''s graduation! But the EC is a little much for that age (and I''m saying this even though I''m only a couple years older than her and I''d kill for a present like that!

). Since she''s so young, it''s a question of appreciating the worth of the gift, safety of the item (don''t want it to get lost or anything), and of course, safety to her (I know I''d be nervous wearing something that big and valuable).

If I were the daughter in that situation, I would definitely love and cherish that kind of gift now, but I would cherish it even MORE later, when I''m older, and on a more momentous occasion (such as a wedding). And I definitely agree with MC - one of my criteria would be stable job, even if it''s only because I would really appreciate earning my own money at that point.

 

[Sizzle]

I really don''t think anything with a high financial value should be passed down until a person is VERY responsible which for some won''t happen til they''re 30 or above!

 

[pennquaker09]

I think that I pretty much agree with everything the wonderful Tacori said. It''s really going to depend on the child. Some are mature at 16 and some are not. But I really like the idea of celebrating milestones. I know that''s what I plan to do with some of the heirlooms we have.

 

[FrekeChild]

Hmmm...

I have a couple of signed prints from a decently famous artist that I knew personally. I will also get a oil painting by him eventually (someone else seems to think it''s theirs at the moment, but it was not given to him, and actually belongs to my dad). I don''t know how much the prints are worth, but I would imagine a pretty penny. My dad framed one and gave it to me for my 24th birthday. For this past Christmas I got the other one.

The reason for me getting them instead of my brothers is that I have an appreciation for his art, I knew the man himself and I don''t have debt.

My mother has a 1.5ct princess that I will get someday. FI thinks that my dad is under orders to give it to me when we get married. Because I got everything else already except her diamond and her wedding band...

I would never dream of selling any of these items unless circumstances were incredibly dire (like, needing food, shelter and a clean glass of water dire). I think it is all about knowing whether or not the child has respect for the item and/or the item''s history. The prints are actually addressed to my parents as kind of a thank you card, and I knew exactly what that diamond meant to my mom (and my dad and I spent WAY too many hours trying to find it.)

So basically, it depends on the kid.

 

[Rhea]

I''m in my late 20s, responsible, no debt, but wouldn''t want a something big at this point in my life. My mother is only just now approaching 60 and I think she''ll be around for at least a couple of decades, she should enjoy her stuff. I''m also not at a place in my life when I''d wear any large pieces or have a place to display the art. I also wouldn''t want the responsibly of having to insure something like a 6 carat diamond right now.

Wait until they and you are really ready. If you have to question it, it''s not the time. If you die tomorrow a will, a trust, or your DH will take care of the pieces.