Girls, keep me in check. I need help.

[designchica]

I need my LIW gals to help keep me in check. I''m totally acting crazy. It''s offical...I''ve completely lost it.

We finally picked a setting and diamond on Saturday. Yay right? Well,yes but no because now more than ever i am acting like a complete nutso lunatic hounding my man with questions of ''when''s it going to be ready?" "How long did they say its going to take?" "When do you think we will get it?" I think I sent him about 8 text messages today along those lines.

His answer, "hunny, just sit back and relax. You will get it when you get it." or "honey, just trust that your man is taking care of it and he loves you and you will get your ring eventually". But I don''t drop it. I''m like, "But when did they say it would be ready? Have you paid for it yet? How many days until its paid for? When will they ship it? How long is it going to take for them to set?" I''m completely driving him insane.

I think he wants me to be "Surprised" which is why is being elusive, but at this point, the surprise is gone and I just want the ring already!!!!! But I know he wants there to be some kidn of surprise element so I am trying really hard to just sit tight and let him do his thing but I can''t stop myself from askign, "When is it coming?"

I thought this part would be the easy part of waiting!! Help! I''m totally ruining this for him!

BTW, cuz I know someone''s gonna ask , this is my ring but it will be set with a 1.92 cushion brilliant. http://www.goodoldgold.com/setting/RL-1571/

 

[CNOS128]

It''s so hard because it feels like the closer you are, the harder it is to wait. I don''t think the guys get how agonizing the wait is, or they wouldn''t all keep telling us to be patient. (Plus, they''d know they could never surprise us because we''re expecting a proposal around every corner). Maybe you should think of it like this: he wants to surprise you, so if you pretend you''re not thinking about it, by not bringing it up, he might give you the ring sooner!

But your ring is effin'' gorgeous, so no wonder you''re having a hard time!!

 

[junepatient]

Try to find the joy in it. Visualize. Stare at your finger until you hallucinate a sparkly rock. It''s the only time in our lives we can be this kind of crosseyed lunatic. Let''s all savor it together....

 

[lindsaylove]

Wow... this is me all over, except I can''t go psycho on my guy because he doesn''t know that I know it''s coming soon! (I''m not sure if that''s better or worse...) so instead I just read and re-read everyone else''s threads about their rings, make to-do lists of things I need to take care of prior to the proposal (manicure, etc.), cut out a to-scale paper version of my stone and tape it to my finger to check out finger converage (yes, I actually did this!!) and mark off days on my calendar at work!

So... I can''t really give you much advice, but this is what helps me. I try to remind myself that bf is as excited as I am, and what he is probably most excited about (other than actually being engaged, of course) is making it special for me by planning a surprise proposal and totally sweeping me off my feet. I get to have a gorgous ring and be engaged to the man of my dreams... and he gets to surprise me and plan a proposal without me hounding him for details! That''s just what I keep telling myself...

and BTW, your ring is going to be amazing!! Congrats!

 

[gwendolyn]

I say treat this like is was a diet and invoke the substitution rule. If you're on a diet and your downfall is, say, potato chips, you'd replace potato chips with something healthier, like chewing some gum. So do the same thing here! Every time you have a question about your ring, bite your tongue and substitute your question with something else--tell you honey how much you love him, or how excited you are, or just ask him for a hug or something. If you try it, maybe it'll work long enough for that baby to be slid onto your finger.

 

[cammy85]

Date: 3/6/2008 9:57:07 AM
Author: gwendolyn
I say treat this like is was a diet and invoke the substitution rule. If you''re on a diet and your downfall is, say, potato chips, you''d replace potato chips with something healthier, like chewing some gum. So do the same thing here! Every time you have a question about your ring, bite your tongue and substitute your question with something else--tell you honey how much you love him, or how excited you are, or just ask him for a hug or something. If you try it, maybe it''ll work long enough for that baby to be slid onto your finger.

That''s a great idea!

That suggestion also happens to make me think of an episode of a TV show called "The War at Home" every time the son wanted to say "F-You!" to his dad, he would painfully say "I looooooove you.." Bit of randomness, but as long as it keeps me from thinking about some of those "other things"!

 

[LegacyGirl]

Wow that will be one stunner of a ring!

 

[bee*]

I agree with Gwendolyn-I had to do the same myself a couple of times when I felt like I was going to bring it up. Just try and bite your tongue as much as you can or change the subject. I know that you want your ring asap but it is so nice seeing the surprise that they plan for you so enjoy the build up to it and how it plans out.

 

[designchica]

I forgot to mention in the first post of this thread that he is saying it is going to be 6-8 weeks at least before I get the ring which seems so far away! anyway, I know he is trying to throw me off. He's admitted to intentionally giving me conflicting informations (one day he says he's ordered it, the next he says he hasn't) so that there is an element of mystery. Yesterday he actually went to the extreme of pretending to get a phone call about loose diamonds and right in front of me he says, "okay, so that is the price for the 1.6? What about the 1.5? What is the cutlet on that?" I could see right through him and knew he was just tryign to throw me off and get me all worked up about him talkign about smaller diamond than what we'd originally discussed. I grabbed the phone out of his hand and saw that there was nobody on the phone. We had a good laugh about that one! You should have seen me trying to get that phone out of his hand. I had to wrestle him to the ground!! We were both laughing so hard neither of us could get a really good grip on it.

Point of the story...I see how hard he's trying to make it so that there is some element of surprise and I dont' want to take that from him. So I will not be bringing up the ring anymore.

Thansk for the advice and for helping to keep me in check!

 

[poshpepper]

I have no advice for you because I am sure that if I were in your shoes right now I would be doing the same thing! Actually come to think of it give me your mans number so I can bug him too

... seriously I cannot wait to see a cushion in that yummy setting... it is going to be a serious stunner!!!!

We will all be waiting (maybe not so patiently) for the pictures

 

[Bridesmaid]

Your ring is gorgeous. And your SO sounds like he''s being really patient. Good advice on the substituting something else, like saying you love him, or asking about his day or something. Meanwhile, you can be breathlessly excited and not drive us the least bit crazy.

 

[HollyS]

Date: 3/5/2008 7:28:17 PM
Author:designchica
I need my LIW gals to help keep me in check. I'm totally acting crazy. It's offical...I've completely lost it.

We finally picked a setting and diamond on Saturday. Yay right? Well,yes but no because now more than ever i am acting like a complete nutso lunatic hounding my man with questions of 'when's it going to be ready?' 'How long did they say its going to take?' 'When do you think we will get it?' I think I sent him about 8 text messages today along those lines.

His answer, 'hunny, just sit back and relax. You will get it when you get it.' or 'honey, just trust that your man is taking care of it and he loves you and you will get your ring eventually'. But I don't drop it. I'm like, 'But when did they say it would be ready? Have you paid for it yet? How many days until its paid for? When will they ship it? How long is it going to take for them to set?' I'm completely driving him insane.

I think he wants me to be 'Surprised' which is why is being elusive, but at this point, the surprise is gone and I just want the ring already!!!!! But I know he wants there to be some kidn of surprise element so I am trying really hard to just sit tight and let him do his thing but I can't stop myself from askign, 'When is it coming?'

I thought this part would be the easy part of waiting!! Help! I'm totally ruining this for him!

BTW, cuz I know someone's gonna ask , this is my ring but it will be set with a 1.92 cushion brilliant. http://www.goodoldgold.com/setting/RL-1571/

So be quiet already. Stop hounding the poor guy; geez. Only you can make this great, or suck the joy completely out of it.

Oh, BTW, great ring!

 

[allycat0303]

Oh that ring is going to be sexy. I think I would drive him crazy too. How could you not with the thoughts of that ring on your finger!! I''m not helping but I can''t wait to see it.

 

[Codependent Gal]

My boyfriend has promised that he is looking for a ring and that he is going to propose within two months. I want to relax and just believe that he is doing it, but it is really hard for me to not ask him every day if he has bought one yet and if he is still going to do it so I understand where you are coming from.

I HATE surprises and I have been checking his email and I haven''t seen any evidence of any recent ring purchases. (I know that a lot of people look down on the email checking aspect of a relationship, but I check his, he checks mine and we are both fine with it)