Gone Stark Raving Crazy!

[firebirdgold]

I''ve gone nuts, We''re not getting married until March and we both already own houses, yet I just called a realtor to look at a house we saw online. We''d been planning on him moving into my house around mid-September when things calm down, and putting his house on the market. We weren''t even going to think about buying a new place until after we got married.

For one thing we''re not even sure he''ll be staying at his current job. Everything''s messed up there as they changed management and they''re now hundreds of millions of dollars short (you''d really think they would have planned ahead on how to pay for all the new taxes now that they''re a for-profit company?

). He hasn''t heard back from the group he wants to switch to yet. If he can change groups he''ll definitely stay, if he can''t he''ll look elsewhere. We''re visiting the university town he has ties to in late August and he''s going to send out feelers. Naturally I can''t imagine anyone turning him down, it''s just that the other group''s manager is overwhelmed at the moment.

And my house is wonderful with lots of extra room and a perfect location. We can walk to everything fun. It''s just that it''s not very private, and he doesn''t care for it that much. This other place is much smaller ... of course that is one of it''s appeals. As newly-weds with one person working constantly I like the idea of being cozier. It''s 20 minutes closer to his work (and 20 minutes farther from my parents), it''s really cute, it''s very private on more than an acre of land. It''s just calling to us, at least via the virtual tour at anyrate. But I don''t even know if I can sell my house to buy a new one, both of my neighbors'' houses are on the market which has gone soft.

Besides, it''s totally nuts to sell my lovely house to buy a new one for the both of us before we''re even married! Wouldn''t that be a total jinx? What do you guys thing??

 

[Mara]

we bought a house before we got married...we knew we were getting married so it was like who cares if it''s 3 months before we are ''legal''...we already know it''s happening. plus we were happy to do it then because that summer the market was insane and we would have been priced out of our place by a mile.

anyway, think really long and hard about this. it''s sooo easy to get caught up in beautiful pictures online or think about the future in a house with your loved one kind of thing. especially maybe mentally you are thinking oh new house, for our new life together kind of thing. but it sounds like you really do love your house!! and you had mentioned previously that selling it and getting a good amount for it may be tough right now.

i''d just take a step back and try to curb your emotions re: this potential new house and imagine you two in your house now and think about your goals and how this new place would modify them...would it be a long-term positive thing or could it create some strife or financial difficulty. why ruin a good thing if it''s working right now by trying to get something ''better''?

i constantly am looking at new houses online and we even go and walk by some of them (we''d love to stay in our neighborhood if we move), but in the end we love our place and we aren''t ready to move yet. also we don''t want to pay more right now. so trust me, i know how easy it is to be like OH that house is SO CUTE and has XYZ for us, but in the end it''s a big decision, so really weigh the pros and cons and don''t let emotions carry you away. Good luck!

 

[sumbride]

I want to caution you not to buy together so long before the wedding for tax purposes! If you''re not filing jointly, that whole "who gets the interest deduction" could be messy. If you were getting married this year then maybe, but if you have a year until you''re filing together, don''t do it without talking to a tax accountant.

Your house sounds lovely and the market sounds soft, so I would wait. Go look at it maybe, but try not to put yourself in jeopardy over it... and a virtual tour can sometimes disguise a real bad apple... so don''t fall in love that way. It has to pass a home inspection first!!!

 

[Tacori E-ring]

We bought our house 3 years ago. I don''t think it is a big deal. I do think you both should be happy with your home and it sounds like he does not like your house. So maybe starting with something new is a good solution.

 

[firebirdgold]

Hmm, sumbride, you were right about the virtual tour disguising a bad apple. The construction quality was abut the level of ''loveing hands at home''.

I may like rustic, but I put my foot down on funky rustic, particularly at the price.

Of course this hasn''t cured my insanity. After I left the house I saw a couple of for sale signs clustered near the village market. I followed the signs up a twisty road past old run-down adobes with rusted out cars in front until the road turned to dirt and broke through to the top of the hills. There were a couple of new(ish) houses up there with amazing views of the mountains and badlands. One of which looked very very intriguing.
I looked it up online when I got home and it was a house designed and built by this architect I''ve heard of, Paula Baker-Laporte. It''s our total dream house designed with the principles of the ''not so big house'' and totally japanese themed. It''s compact and open with a seperate guest house for office space. Dream kitchen, dream view, dream style, dream everything! The house is even ecologically sound! the house

Of course it''s also horribly expensive, well over my current house!

Yet I''ve made an appointment to go see it tomorrow. I''m telling myself that it''s really an oppertunity to look at the architect''s japanese work in case we ever want to build our own house.

(not terribly practical since it is almost impossible to find lots under $200k.) But at least it isn''t quite so crazy! er, right?

Mara, you''re right that part of it is me thinking new house for our new life! A very seductive thought. But I had better focus on actually getting married, him moving in here, and getting his house ready for sale.

 

[sumbride]

Now THAT is a house! Wow! Ok, I can see why could fall head over heels with that one, but if it''s too expensive, it''s too expensive... plus you wouldn''t be able to walk to anything fun anymore! Love that architect though. Wow!


When M and I were looking for a house, we walked into an open house in our chosen neighborhood and almost ran out the door when the flier said "$600,000". The builder encouraged us to look anyway... that he had a lot of other projects coming up that we might be interested in and we should get an idea of what he could do. The house was truly fabulous... 4 levels, plus a rooftop deck... it was amazing and we both loved it. It was across the street from the magnificent park... it was great. But, um, reality set in and we did sprint out the door and later found another home we loved for less than half that amount. Sure, there''s no roof top deck with a view of the water, we''re 2 blocks from the park and it''s only 3 levels, but we can still afford to feed and clothe ourselves! Never did see any more work by that builder but I would have liked to. The house eventually dropped down by about $100k in price because nobody wanted to spend that much money to live in our neighborhood! Ha! Anyway... the point of all this is... go see the house because maybe the architect has other, more affordable projects coming up in the future. Plus just seeing something like that in person is like a trip to an art gallery. That kitchen.... swoon...