Help choosing a diamond tennis necklace???

[Emerald City]

Hi, all,

My sincere gratitude to all who helped me with the other topics: choosing a jeweler to re-set a mysterious blue stone, getting an antique necklace repaired, and making matching earrings for said necklace. I have sent the stone to Sako in LA, and have asked him if he would repair the necklace - waiting to hear back on that one. Wiser people than I told me to wait until the blue stone ring is completed before beginning a custom earring project, so I have heeded their advice.

I am currently looking for a diamond tennis necklace, something I have wanted since Hector was a pup. I have done EXTENSIVE looking, and the only thing I have concluded is that an Etsy seller who has a 23cttw necklace for $19,000 is probably using clarity-enhanced diamonds or somesuch, because that carat weight at that price point is NUTS. (I know Etsy can be awful, but I have found some of my nicest pieces there, including the emerald daisy ring in my profile photo. So I thought I'd at least look there.) I also found some lab-created necklaces, but I am hesitant to buy a lab-created diamond necklace as I want this piece to be that showstopper to leave for the next generations to fight over, haha.

I am 5'11" and dainty necklaces have always looked silly on me, so I think around 13cttw is the minimum I would like to go; around 20-25cttw is ideal. Anywhere between those carat weights is also welcome. I'd prefer a platinum setting but I'll also take 18k or even 14k white gold. Length needs to be around 18 inches. For whatever reason, I HATE graduated necklaces and would prefer a necklace with stones all the same size. The one exception is rivière-style necklaces; I actually prefer they be graduated. I would also prefer a rivière to a tennis style, but I'll ultimately be happy with either. I don't care if the necklace is pre-owned, so long as it is still in excellent condition with minimal scratching on the metal. I will wear this piece almost every day. I wear my tiaras around the house and I tend to like big, statement jewelry, so a large rivière or tennis necklace would suit my style! (I call my style 'Elizabeth Taylor Wanna-Be,' haha. Though I never liked her Bulgari emerald necklace; the emeralds were gorgeous but the styling was not to my taste.)

So here are some of my questions. Should I go for lab-created diamonds anyway? Why/why not?
Should I go for whiter stones with better clarity that may be smaller, versus larger stones that are I-SI2? A a surprising number of necklaces feature stones that are H-J SI1-3. That just doesn't seem very sparkly to me, and I want the necklace to be as sparkly as I can afford, but am I being too picky?
Also, my budget is up to $40,000 right now. Should I just wait until I have a higher budget, given my preferences?
What places should I look? So far I've looked at Lang Antiques, Ivy & Rose, 1st Dibs (which has several pieces that have caught my eye!), WhiteFlash, BlueNile, Etsy, & eBay. Plus a few other places I forgot.

Thank you all SO MUCH! I have never made a purchase this large before and I feel so uncertain; I don't want to have buyer's remorse. I want to adore the piece and cherish it. And thank you for reading all of this.

 

[dk168]

I have not purchased from this eBay seller, however, I have seen this shop being recommended time and time again for tennis necklace, and they have a 19ct one listed currently:

19cttw Tennis Necklace at deejayjewelers of eBay

DK

 

[diamondseeker2006]

Briony Raymond sells her own jewelry and high end estate jewelry in NYC. She has an IG account. I have seen her offer diamond necklaces before. That might be a way to get a higher quality one second hand. I'd rather have that than a new, full retail lab diamond necklace.

 

[Emerald City]

I have not purchased from this eBay seller, however, I have seen this shop being recommended time and time again for tennis necklace, and they have a 19ct one listed currently:

19cttw Tennis Necklace at deejayjewelers of eBay

DK

Wow, that is a stunner!! Thank you so much Still have some thinking to do but that one is now on my list of contenders. Thank you!!!!

 

[Emerald City]

Briony Raymond sells her own jewelry and high end estate jewelry in NYC. She has an IG account. I have seen her offer diamond necklaces before. That might be a way to get a higher quality one second hand. I'd rather have that than a new, full retail lab diamond necklace.

WOW, thanks for this!! She has a pair of amethyst earrings that would almost perfectly match my amethyst rivière necklace; they're even the style @Karl_K and I had been discussing. That is eerie!! Thank you so much!!!!

 

[Karl_K]

WOW, thanks for this!! She has a pair of amethyst earrings that would almost perfectly match my amethyst rivière necklace; they're even the style @Karl_K and I had been discussing. That is eerie!! Thank you so much!!!!

link?

 

[Emerald City]

link?

Amethyst Chandelier Earrings

A pair of antique 18k yellow gold earrings featuring faceted amethysts with curved posts.

brionyraymond.com

Still says they're available, but I purchased them. Huh!

Anyway, they're not a perfect match, but they're close enough! I think they will look amazing with my necklace! My necklace photographed more rose-gold looking here, but it is really bright yellow with a little patina. I think the gold will match well enough.

 

[Emerald City]

Briony Raymond sells her own jewelry and high end estate jewelry in NYC. She has an IG account. I have seen her offer diamond necklaces before. That might be a way to get a higher quality one second hand. I'd rather have that than a new, full retail lab diamond necklace.

Oh, and I agree; something about a lab-created necklace doesn't feel right. If I just wanted something for myself, I'd get one, but I want to get something that is an heirloom to pass down the generations, something that will better hold its value over time. I hope that makes sense.

 

[Karl_K]

Amethyst Chandelier Earrings

A pair of antique 18k yellow gold earrings featuring faceted amethysts with curved posts.

brionyraymond.com

Still says they're available, but I purchased them. Huh!

Anyway, they're not a perfect match, but they're close enough! I think they will look amazing with my necklace!

kewl
check the stones for windowing at normal viewing distance/angle. on ear shot shows a large tilt window.
The angle is not a normal viewing angle however.
They are close enough the will look made for each other when worn with the necklace!!!!

 

[diamondseeker2006]

Oh, and I agree; something about a lab-created necklace doesn't feel right. If I just wanted something for myself, I'd get one, but I want to get something that is an heirloom to pass down the generations, something that will better hold its value over time. I hope that makes sense.

I am very much of the same mind-set! I love the idea of heirloom jewelry to hand down and think about that as I make any purchase! I am also not opposed to lab diamonds, in general, but I am more focused on natural for the heirloom aspect!

 

[Emerald City]

kewl
check the stones for windowing at normal viewing distance/angle. on ear shot shows a large tilt window.
The angle is not a normal viewing angle however.
They are close enough the will look made for each other when worn with the necklace!!!!

I saw the windowing but I am willing to overlook it because I think the earrings overall are perfect for my needs And thank you! - I agree, I think they will look as though they were made for each other (I always think of "Sleepless in Seattle" when I hear that phrase now, lol) when they're all worn together. I am so excited!!

I want to thank you in particular because the design you mentioned kept playing in my head, so that when I saw these earrings I felt that *swoop* in my gut that told me to buy THESE, NOW! These are SO much better than my jeweler's idea of chopping the amethyst necklace into pieces, lol. That is a terrible idea, if I may say so.

Now. Still on the hunt for a tennis/rivière necklace...

 

[Emerald City]

I am very much of the same mind-set! I love the idea of heirloom jewelry to hand down and think about that as I make any purchase! I am also not opposed to lab diamonds, in general, but I am more focused on natural for the heirloom aspect!

Lab diamonds are awesome and they are fun, but for now, natural diamonds are still considered preferable. I tend to think about heirloom-ish things when I buy pieces now. I didn't used to, but I learned a lot trying to sell my mother's jewelry.

She always went for cheap vs. quality, and the pieces I inherited illustrated this: They were mostly garbage. There were a few gold rings, but almost all of them were really thin gold and obviously not well made. There was just a handful of pieces that were surprisingly nice, including gold earrings and a hand-carved gold ring with a small yellow diamond. She also had a gorgeous Persian turquoise ring set in ~17k yellow gold (a hilarious karat, but that is what it tested by my jeweler). I sold a few of the actually nice pieces. A lot of the rest was pot metal (I can't wear mystery metal due to allergies), mostly broken. All that went into the garbage. I have a literal shoebox full of her sterling silver rings set with various CZs. I can't bear to throw them away because silver is silver, but otherwise they are completely worthless. I would be happy to sell the lot to someone but who wants to buy that??

My mother could have afforded to buy better, but she just didn't care. She never gave a single thought as to what I would be inheriting. (She was also a narcissist, but that is a whole other post.) And that hurts. I remember a post on here where a member had already made a custom emerald & diamond ring (huge and gorgeous!!) for her daughter, and was in the process of making a sapphire & diamond one for the daughter she (the PS member) was about to have. My mother never once thought about me that way, and that is a lasting source of pain. Every time I look at her pieces, I think about how she had utter disregard for me. Which is why so much of her stuff went into the trash, and most of the remaining stuff was sold, either on LoupeTroop or for scrap.

I want the people who inherit my jewelry to be truly happy to inherit it, to remember me (hopefully happily!) by it, and to appreciate its value, because it does have value. I have accumulated some extremely nice pieces - nothing like a lot of the mindblowing pieces here on PS, but still respectable pieces. They aren't the biggest, but they are made well and the stones are good quality. I also try to stay away from any gold under 14k; it just isn't worth much.

So the diamond necklace I buy must be the best I can afford. In a way, I am making up for my mother's thoughtlessness by ensuring that I leave behind worthy pieces to the next generation.

I think I might sell one of my emerald rings - the square emerald with trillion-cut side stones, set in 14k white gold. Not sure yet.

 

[LilAlex]

I see the dilemma -- heirloom vs LGD. I have not been a huge fan of LGD and maybe I should say nothing. But I think you have backed yourself into a LGD corner -- with the need for size, length, sparkle, and with a hard cut-off of $40K. Just being (excessively?) reductionist here.

If you read this and feel I've got it all wrong, then you also have your answer!

 

[Emerald City]

I see the dilemma -- heirloom vs LGD. I have not been a huge fan of LGD and maybe I should say nothing. But I think you have backed yourself into a LGD corner -- with the need for size, length, sparkle, and with a hard cut-off of $40K. Just being (excessively?) reductionist here.

If you read this and feel I've got it all wrong, then you also have your answer!

It isn't a hard cutoff, and I also mention that if I need to wait and save up some more, that is a possibility.

 

[Wink]

So the diamond necklace I buy must be the best I can afford. In a way, I am making up for my mother's thoughtlessness by ensuring that I leave behind worthy pieces to the next generation.

Please allow me a possibly unpopular opinion about heirlooms. To you, me and to many, an heirloom is a quality natural diamond that will cost megabucks in the size we want, especially if we are wanting great cutting.

Now, let's fast forward to your old age, whether that is 20, 40 or 50 years with the advances that are coming in medicine. I, at 75 am already a geezer and will most likely miss those coming improvements, but C'est la vie as our French friends say.

A natural 2 ct diamond by then could well be over $200,00 or maybe more, depending on the rate of inflation and just how quickly the natural mines go dry and no more are found to replace them.

What's this you say, there are incredible cutters out there working for companies like WhiteFlash and Continental Diamond who in addition to their incredible Billion Dollar inventories of natural diamonds, have also millions of dollars worth of affordable Lab grown diamonds that are cut to incredible precision and carry lab reports by the best cut analysis laboratories in the world?

The youth of our day are already gravitating to the more affordable lab grown diamonds. As the naturals take on prices once paid for a Picasso or a Renoir, I think the younger amongst us will gravitate to fine quality Lab Grown diamonds, and the piece you can afford today in a Lab grown, will be a treasured heirloom in the not too distant future.

I reserve the right to be wrong, of course. I wish I could get a message through from my progeny in fifty years, it would be fun to know...

 

[LilAlex]

My mother could have afforded to buy better, but she just didn't care. She never gave a single thought as to what I would be inheriting. (She was also a narcissist, but that is a whole other post.) And that hurts. I remember a post on here where a member had already made a custom emerald & diamond ring (huge and gorgeous!!) for her daughter, and was in the process of making a sapphire & diamond one for the daughter she (the PS member) was about to have. My mother never once thought about me that way, and that is a lasting source of pain. Every time I look at her pieces, I think about how she had utter disregard for me. Which is why so much of her stuff went into the trash, and most of the remaining stuff was sold, either on LoupeTroop or for scrap.

My kids will love to inherit our jewelry. But beyond a few sentimental pieces, I'm sure they would much rather inherit the cash . My Mom had a few things and it's nice to see them around now. My Dad had nothing of quality -- except the two things Mom bought for him. I have neither of them. Like you, it inspired me to have a couple things worth passing down and that the kids could associate with me (or sell for drug money).

 

[Bron357]

I purchased my diamond necklace from DeeJay jewellers and am very happy with it. The are US based and make them. They have a bricks and mortar store but I bought mine through eBay as I’m in Australia.
I bought the 10.75 carat one and graduated with the Centre being .52 carats. Substantial weight too at 28 grams.
Mine is 18 inches and while less likely to ”flip” at that length I went a step further and put a pendant, fixed, on.
No flipping ever.
Whoever you buy from, make sure you can return it if it’s not as you expected.

 

[diamondseeker2006]

Please allow me a possibly unpopular opinion about heirlooms. To you, me and to many, an heirloom is a quality natural diamond that will cost megabucks in the size we want, especially if we are wanting great cutting.

Now, let's fast forward to your old age, whether that is 20, 40 or 50 years with the advances that are coming in medicine. I, at 75 am already a geezer and will most likely miss those coming improvements, but C'est la vie as our French friends say.

A natural 2 ct diamond by then could well be over $200,00 or maybe more, depending on the rate of inflation and just how quickly the natural mines go dry and no more are found to replace them.

What's this you say, there are incredible cutters out there working for companies like WhiteFlash and Continental Diamond who in addition to their incredible Billion Dollar inventories of natural diamonds, have also millions of dollars worth of affordable Lab grown diamonds that are cut to incredible precision and carry lab reports by the best cut analysis laboratories in the world?

The youth of our day are already gravitating to the more affordable lab grown diamonds. As the naturals take on prices once paid for a Picasso or a Renoir, I think the younger amongst us will gravitate to fine quality Lab Grown diamonds, and the piece you can afford today in a Lab grown, will be a treasured heirloom in the not too distant future.

I reserve the right to be wrong, of course. I wish I could get a message through from my progeny in fifty years, it would be fun to know...

Wink, I think you are right about that. Most young couples in their 20’s simply can’t spend $10k+ on an engagement ring. But if that one carat diamond can be equally beautiful and durable at $1000, I definitely think the majority will end up with a lab grown diamond. If I had a choice today of a half carat natural and a 1.5 ct lab grown, I’d honestly prefer wearing the 1.5. But I also would not get a 5 ct lab grown and pretend it’s natural, either. It wouldn’t be comfortable in my social circle (outside PS, that is!).

 

[diamondseeker2006]

One other thing, my mother wasn’t particularly interested in jewelry. She had a few pieces of fine jewelry that she wore daily. It’s never crossed my mind to be upset with her for not leaving me more jewelry. Jewelry is my hobby and that’s why I am interested in leaving heirloom jewelry to my girls and granddaughters. They already do ask to see my jewelry when they come over, so I do hope those will be good memories for them! But my mother has other things to remember her by such as being a great cook and having wonderful Southern big meals on Sundays and holidays when we were home. I have her china which is more meaningful to me. Sadly I don’t think the formal china is going to be handed down much longer, though! That’s going away, too!

 

[Wink]

I have her china which is more meaningful to me. Sadly I don’t think the formal china is going to be handed down much longer, though! That’s going away, too!

I wish you were wrong, but I fear you are right. Much of my wife's silver was stolen many years ago and we used it so rarely we did not bother to replace it. I have three different flavors of fine china, two inherited from my mom and one received as wedding gifts more than 49 years ago.

None of them get the use they merit and I don't think either of my kids are excited about receiving even one set of them. Last time I used any of them was for the get together we had long ago in Boise in the mythical time before The Covid came and changed life as we know it...

 

[dk168]

I see a lot of old china and crystal glasses being donated to the charity shop where I used to work, all gilded, and very fancifully decorated.

They are not dishwasher compatible, which is one of the reasons they have fallen out of favour with the younger generation.

DK

 

[Wink]

They are not dishwasher compatible, which is one of the reasons they have fallen out of favour with the younger generation.

True. I am reminded of being at my B&M store in 1980 or 81 and talking with two ladies about their fine silver and china. The daughter in law had asked me about dishwasher compatibility and I had recommended not putting either in the washer.

The mother in law looked at both of us as if we were crazy. "I just put mine in the washer on the mild cycle. If any of them ever break or loose their designs, I shall simply buy new ones..."

 

[diamondseeker2006]

I wish you were wrong, but I fear you are right. Much of my wife's silver was stolen many years ago and we used it so rarely we did not bother to replace it. I have three different flavors of fine china, two inherited from my mom and one received as wedding gifts more than 49 years ago.

None of them get the use they merit and I don't think either of my kids are excited about receiving even one set of them. Last time I used any of them was for the get together we had long ago in Boise in the mythical time before The Covid came and changed life as we know it...

So much the same story here! Because our parents usually hosted the big holiday events, I have rarely used my own china, crystal, and sterling flatware. The last parent died this summer, so I think there will be more Thanksgiving, Christmas. and Easter dinners at our home with just our kids and their kids. But even using these things once or twice a year seems not worth having it, so I can see the next generation not bothering with it. The two kind of sad things for me is no one wanting my mother's china (mine I care less about), and I doubt they'll want the silverware, either. I had extra sets of the silver to give to both daughters, but newer homes don't even have formal dining rooms, and in older homes they are often converted for a more useful purpose. So I guess the next time silver goes to $40+ an ounce, I might pare down the extra I had collected to give to them. I always loved china and collected multiple sets, but I started selling some of it a year or so ago because I don't want to burden my kids in the future! In a way it feels good to just part with things that are never used and have less stuff!

And back to the topic of jewelry....it takes up a lot less room to collect jewelry!

 

[MissGotRocks]

So much the same story here! Because our parents usually hosted the big holiday events, I have rarely used my own china, crystal, and sterling flatware. The last parent died this summer, so I think there will be more Thanksgiving, Christmas. and Easter dinners at our home with just our kids and their kids. But even using these things once or twice a year seems not worth having it, so I can see the next generation not bothering with it. The two kind of sad things for me is no one wanting my mother's china (mine I care less about), and I doubt they'll want the silverware, either. I had extra sets of the silver to give to both daughters, but newer homes don't even have formal dining rooms, and in older homes they are often converted for a more useful purpose. So I guess the next time silver goes to $40+ an ounce, I might pare down the extra I had collected to give to them. I always loved china and collected multiple sets, but I started selling some of it a year or so ago because I don't want to burden my kids in the future! In a way it feels good to just part with things that are never used and have less stuff!

And back to the topic of jewelry....it takes up a lot less room to collect jewelry!

It is much the same with many of us in this generation DS! These once coveted collections are no longer wanted. It is sad but practical I suppose. Like you, I will probably be getting rid of some of this stuff at some point because I know neither of the kids want or need it. I only set a formal table for holidays and the kids are already taking over some of those dinners. Perhaps what is old will once again be new again but probably not in my lifetime!

 

[Mary Queen of Scotch]

I wish you were wrong, but I fear you are right. Much of my wife's silver was stolen many years ago and we used it so rarely we did not bother to replace it. I have three different flavors of fine china, two inherited from my mom and one received as wedding gifts more than 49 years ago.

None of them get the use they merit and I don't think either of my kids are excited about receiving even one set of them. Last time I used any of them was for the get together we had long ago in Boise in the mythical time before The Covid came and changed life as we know it...

This is all so strange to me! Granted, I am not hot off the generation presses (slightly younger end of Gen Y), but my Irish twin and I are both girding our loins for the fight over heirloom china, silver and crystal. Even our thoroughly Gen Z, 20-year-old baby brother has an interest in them.

Growning up, our family always used “the good china” — for no good reason — at least a couple meals a week. Maybe that sounds lace-curtain or something, but given the options of either…

1) Lifting myself out of the doldrums of everyday life and making even ordinary activities special by enjoying the beautiful things that I own

2) Neglecting or tossing wonderful, often sentimental items in order to avoid a dish sponge at all costs

…I know what I choose. But then again, I am a certified packrat and perhaps not the most practical girl.

Maybe treat yourself to a ham sandwich on your favorite pattern this Thursday?

 

[dk168]

Back to tennis necklace!

Personally, I would not get one as I cannot afford the one that I would like as a dainty necklace does not suit me due to being plus size with a chunky neck!

I would prefer to get substantial convertible brooch-pendants instead with that healthy budget.

Personal preferences and all that.

DK

 

[Emerald City]

Sorry, everyone - Re-injured my back a couple of days ago & my doctor wants me to get x-rays to see if I loosened the screws in there. In a lot of pain & can't really pay attention to the thread right now. Necklace will have to wait. Thank you all for your thoughtful responses; when I can concentrate better I'll come back.

 

[MissGotRocks]

Sorry, everyone - Re-injured my back a couple of days ago & my doctor wants me to get x-rays to see if I loosened the screws in there. In a lot of pain & can't really pay attention to the thread right now. Necklace will have to wait. Thank you all for your thoughtful responses; when I can concentrate better I'll come back.

Oh, no, take care of your back first and foremost! Healing vibes sent your way!