Help me choose where to get married. Seriously.

[Gypsy]

We are getting married next summer. Come hell or high water (already planned two weddings, had them fall through).

We want to get married on a cruise. Well, probably just before the ship sets sail. IDEAL wedding dates would be June 22-July 1st. Don't care where it's going particularly. Don't care what cruise line as long as it is REALLY REALLY nice. And the wedding budget (excludes dress, suit, rings) is 8-10K. Flowers will be minimal and will only take up about $600 of budget. Guest will be about 60 max. (Hopefully. Don't want anymore) And that's for people coming for ceremony and leaving before we set sail. About 15 people to join us on cruise itself.

Any ideas? I'm seriously fried on the wedding planning front-- I've planned TWO down the the placecard holders. Already have a dress, shoes, cake cutter... oh and a bunch of stuff. My headpeice... you name it. Jewelry... argh!

If anyone has ideas please post them.

If you know someone that got married on a cruise and it was great... please post.

If you know someone who works for a cruise line and plans these things... fabulous.

If you know someone who is a therapist and will keep me from murdering our family members before we get up the aisle... even better.

Oh yeah...My family lives in CA, his in NY. We both wre raised by our grandfathers and consider them our fathers. We would like both to attend. Neither one can fly due to medical considerations.

 

[Selkie]

Oh, dear. Is there a thread somewhere on what happened with the two previously planned weddings?? I can''t imagine...

Can either grandfather travel long distances in a car? Could you do the wedding on either the west coast, or east coast, and then have another reception/party (I know, I know, more planning) with the other side of the family?

Chickflick is getting married on a cruise ship in Texas before it sets sail, with a portion of her family, and having a second reception elsewhere. Maybe she has some tips.

Sorry this isn''t very helpful, but you sound stressed, to put it mildly and I wanted to offer what little I could!

 

[flutterby]

I also dont really have any advice. I dont know much about cruise weddings. You could maybe do a search on the knot, they might have some ideas.

How did planning weddings get so exhausting. Of all the weddings I''ve been to and been in I never knew. Had no idea. Heres me, I''m just getting married in vegas, but with florists and food tastings it is so much more than I ever expected.

So is one grandfather coming from NY the other from CA? That makes it really tough. Galveston or new orleans would probably be the closest to in the middle eh?

 

[Gypsy]

I was a knottie for a long time. A fixture on the RE board truth to tell. But honestly, I don''t know how to say it except the cancelled wedding memories are really painful. I really threw my heart and soul into them (sounds dramatic... but I''m a virgo... when i plan something I wade all the way in) and so I don''t really want to go back to the knot. And no, there are no threads on here about the cancelled weddings. The last one was cancelled 18 months ago... and would have taken place Last September.

There will be receptions on both coasts. BUT both grandfathers have made us promise that we will plan it so that they will be there. And they were both ill and the time... and well, we promised. That they''d be there. For the actual exchange of vows. For the first time.

This is going to sound awful... but sometimes I feel like we are waiting for one or the other to pass. Which is just gut wrenching. And horrible. But well... there it is.

 

[tracys126]

Hornblower Cruises in San Diego has a fleet of different style yachts. They organize weddings aboard them. It looks really cool (and affordable). I was checking it out the other day...

www.hornblowerweddings.com

 

[E B]

Gypsy,

Electra Cruises is another good choice (from what I've heard) for a cruise wedding:

Electra Cruises

One of the great things about it is that most of the wedding stuff that's stressful to plan is already included (minister, buffet, beverages, DJ, wedding cake, all flowers, and a wedding coordinator!) for an extremely reasonable price. If you book the Electra boat on a Saturday night, all the above is $6170 for 50 people (I'm not sure if it's extra for the 10 more you'll be expecting...it says "100 max")!

I think the idea of two receptions is a great idea; you'll be able to spend time with each side of the family in a unique way.

ETA:

A couple cute invitation choices:

Fun Ahoy

Nautical

...and voila! A fun, unique west-coast wedding for around $7k. Not bad!

 

[E B]

To save money on your east coast reception, does one of FIs relatives have a house you could have a small celebration at? You could do just cake and champagne, and perhaps have a "potluck" celebration, so that the family could feel really involved. Ask those grandmothers to make their finest dishes!

I don't know, just a suggestion ;D

 

[Gypsy]

Hmm... so these are short cruises... not like say... a Holland America Cruise to Alaska for 7 days and nights with the wedding on boat before the rest of us go cruising? Cause that''s what I had in mind. Hmm... will have to look into these suggestions further. Thanks!

And please, if you guys have more ideas... keep them coming.

 

[Gypsy]

Okay... yeah those look amazing. But they won''t work. Wedding number 2 was in SF at the Mark Hopkins. And the guest list (my mother is insane) was up to 230 people. A full reception like that... just would be bad. The guest list would explode... my mother swearing she''s going to pay for the 100 people she''s invited, and my stepfather about to have a heartattack. Nope. It has to be like a ceremony before we set sail for A LONG cruise. On an expensive cruise... like one to Alaska or Europe or Outer Mongolia. Someplace that it''s clear the reception (small lunch time type thing... mostly just for pictures and lauighter with nearest and dearest) would take place on the cruise... for the people who have paid the $2000 for the cruise costs.

I don''t want this too be easy for people to attend. I will have to invite all 230 people on the list. I just want most to be... oh, it''s nice they invited us... but I don''t think we can afford a cruise right now... OH LOOK there''s going to be a reception here a month after the wedding. We''ll go to that instead. How lovely.

 

[Gypsy]

Date: 5/20/2006 2:04:33 PM
Author: EBree
To save money on your east coast reception, does one of FIs relatives have a house you could have a small celebration at? You could do just cake and champagne, and perhaps have a ''potluck'' celebration, so that the family could feel really involved. Ask those grandmothers to make their finest dishes!

I don''t know, just a suggestion ;D

Oh yeah... we''re not payiing for the receptions. FMIL''s present will be east coast reception at a local place where she is close to the owner a brunch reception... or at FSIL''s huge house for a lunch buffet reception. West coast reception will be at my uncle''s house which is gigantic in CA, evening PARTY.

So really the 8-10K is for the ceremony and a five to seven day cruise for us right afterward> Sorry I didn''t clarify!

 

[E B]

Oh, okay! You meant one of those cruises! I completely misunderstood.

So will this $10k include your 12 guests' cruise "admission", or will they be paying for it themselves?

Princess Cruises go to Alaska, and they have several different departure dates. It looks like you'd have to fly to Canada or Alaska (there are other places listed too, but these seem the most common) to board the ship, but that's normal. Not including airfare, you and FI could book a 7 day Alaskan Cruise in a balcony stateroom for around $4k. The normal rooms for guests (without windows) are around $1k pp, I think...depending on certain factors.

Princess Cruise Lines

Here's an article on In-Port Ceremonies:

In Port Ceremonies

I'm not sure how the above would work (I've been on two cruises and they've always been really hectic the first day) but I'm sure they'd arrange something beautiful.

 

[cpster]

Hmm...this one may be tough. I would give a few of the major cruise lines a call to see if it's even a possibility. The first day is extremely busy. Also, once a ship comes to port at the end of one cruise, they are basically rushing to get ready for the next set of passengers.

There are a few cruise lines that leave from San Francisco. My friend is going on one to Alaska. Good luck and let us know what you find out. Otherwise, would it be bad to not invite the entire list to the wedding and instead invite them to the receptions? Kind of like you decided to elope?

 

[snow_happy]

If your grandparents'' health isn''t in the best shape then a cold place like Alaska (still pretty cold in the summer) probably isn''t the best thing. Maybe a cruise to a warm place like the Bahamas?

 

[E B]

Date: 5/20/2006 3:24:26 PM
Author: snow_happy
If your grandparents'' health isn''t in the best shape then a cold place like Alaska (still pretty cold in the summer) probably isn''t the best thing. Maybe a cruise to a warm place like the Bahamas?

I was under the impression the grandparents were coming to the east/west coast receptions, not to the ceremony/cruise.

 

[Gypsy]

Date: 5/20/2006 3:15:35 PM
Author: EBree
Oh, okay! You meant one of those cruises! I completely misunderstood.

So will this $10k include your 12 guests'' cruise ''admission'', or will they be paying for it themselves?

Princess Cruises go to Alaska, and they have several different departure dates. It looks like you''d have to fly to Canada or Alaska (there are other places listed too, but these seem the most common) to board the ship, but that''s normal. Not including airfare, you and FI could book a 7 day Alaskan Cruise in a balcony stateroom for around $4k. The normal rooms for guests (without windows) are around $1k pp, I think...depending on certain factors.

Princess Cruise Lines

Here''s an article on In-Port Ceremonies:

In Port Ceremonies

I''m not sure how the above would work (I''ve been on two cruises and they''ve always been really hectic the first day) but I''m sure they''d arrange something beautiful.

Oh no. Our families are well off enough financially that they can pony up the cash to attend the wedding... and if they don''t want to... well that''s why we''re getting married at the port. They can come to the ceremony... and LEAVE. Then attend one of the receptions. That''s the WHOLE GENIUS of this. See... in the last FIVE FREAKING YEARS OF WEDDING PLANNING... I''ve come to stop caring about their comfort. Period. They certainly don''t care about ours (oh the stories I could tell you).


So we will be paying for:

The nicest accomodations we can afford. Balcony, view, King sized bed the works.
An officiant and a simple elegant ceremony.
Invitations.
Thank you gifts for everyone attending either the ceremony or the whole THING. (Still have 150 hand made gold and mother of pearl inlaid boxes from cancelled wedding number one)
Small private luncheon with two ''signature'' alcoholic beverages and a champange toast after the ship sets sail for the guests of the party still aboard.

That''s IT.

 

[Gypsy]

Date: 5/20/2006 3:24:26 PM
Author: snow_happy
If your grandparents' health isn't in the best shape then a cold place like Alaska (still pretty cold in the summer) probably isn't the best thing. Maybe a cruise to a warm place like the Bahamas?

Honestly, neither of our grandfathers' will leave their rooms long enough for it to matter. They are both TV addicts. Not really worried about that. But it was a very good thought. Neither of them is very mobile. His is 98 mine is 90.

I am probably going to have just call the freaking cruise lines. Okay then.


I've never been on a long cruise. What are the good lines, and what are the ones to avoid. I've heard good things about Holland America and Norwegian... any thoughts???

ALL OF YOU HAVE BEEN AMAZING! THANK YOU!

 

[E B]

I''d avoid both Carnival and Disney Cruises due to the kid factor. I usually love kids, but I wouldn''t love hundreds of them on my honeymoon.

 

[Gypsy]

Okay that''s great advice. I''m not a fan of children when vacationing. Okay... that''s not true... I think they are fine, it''s their parent I have problems with. I just can''t imagine they are particularly well behaved when they are on vacation in the middle of the ocean and Mommy is at the spa and Daddy is at the Casino. Parent don''t seen to give a crap what Jnr is up to when they are on vacvation. Gives me the willies just thinking about it.

 

[Blue824]

Ok, sorry if I''m unclear on a few points... so do you definitely want/need the cruise to leave from California? That may be the trickiest part. Even for Alaskan cruises I think I only came across one that left from San Fran when I was doing research for our trip this summer. The other thing was, did you want the ceremony aboard the actual cruise ship? Because I would assume there may be problems getting unticketed guests aboard the ship before it debarks... and plus, boarding the ship can be a long process, long lines, waiting to activate cards, and I guess I wouldn''t want to be in a crowded line in my wedding dress...

The higher end lines are going to have the fewest children, like Crystal, but that may be pushing your budget. I think an Alaskan cruise would have fewer children too because its not a beachy vacation, but nature and I''d assume it''d attract a more mature crowd. They can''t just leave their kids at the pool for the afternoon because it isn''t hot enough to do that. But to be honest, I don''t think I''ve ever really had problems with really roudy children on cruises.

Anyway, I''d definitely check out cruisecritic.com they''re very helpful and have good boards. Also, look at the individual company sites, they should all have their 2007 schedules out by now, I''m sure some are already booking 2008 already.

Oh, just another thing to keep in mind...the prices aren''t all inclusive. There are lots of extras once you get on board.

 

[Gypsy]

Date: 5/20/2006 9:04:34 PM
Author: Blue824

Ok, sorry if I''m unclear on a few points... so do you definitely want/need the cruise to leave from California? That may be the trickiest part. Even for Alaskan cruises I think I only came across one that left from San Fran when I was doing research for our trip this summer. The other thing was, did you want the ceremony aboard the actual cruise ship? Because I would assume there may be problems getting unticketed guests aboard the ship before it debarks... and plus, boarding the ship can be a long process, long lines, waiting to activate cards, and I guess I wouldn''t want to be in a crowded line in my wedding dress...

The higher end lines are going to have the fewest children, like Crystal, but that may be pushing your budget. I think an Alaskan cruise would have fewer children too because its not a beachy vacation, but nature and I''d assume it''d attract a more mature crowd. They can''t just leave their kids at the pool for the afternoon because it isn''t hot enough to do that. But to be honest, I don''t think I''ve ever really had problems with really roudy children on cruises.

Anyway, I''d definitely check out cruisecritic.com they''re very helpful and have good boards. Also, look at the individual company sites, they should all have their 2007 schedules out by now, I''m sure some are already booking 2008 already.

Oh, just another thing to keep in mind...the prices aren''t all inclusive. There are lots of extras once you get on board.

Hmm... okay may have to re-think the whole timing of the wedding thing.

Maybe get married at a port of call and have people fly in if they want? About the CA thing... No, it doesn''t have to leave out of CA, or NY for that matter. If fact, if it left somewhere ''neutral'' it might be best. New Orleans, I think someone suggested or FL.

Crystal huh? Will have to investigate Crystal.

Just for kicks...lol. Thanks for the cruisecritic info... that will be a huge help, I''m sure.