Help, need last-minute anniversary gift suggestions!

[peonygirl]

I'm usually the person who buys gifts months in advance, but I guess schools stress has gotten the best of me recently. Tomorrow is my one year anniversary with my boyfriend (soon-to-be finance, yay!) and although I've thought of a gift for him, I'm having trouble figuring out how to present it.

Basically, I want to get us an engagement photo package with a photographer I really like, but I need to find a way to "package" that nicely since it's not a tangible gift. I was originally going to ask the photographers for some type of engagement session certificate, but I want to make sure their schedules worked with the wedding date we eventually choose first because I want our engagement and wedding photographers to be the same (so I could get comfortable with them and make sure I love their style). I'm not worried about giving him the gift before we're engaged because at this point I know he's just waiting for the ring to be done, but then again a part of me feels kinda weird because this is a very couplely gift (versus something he himself has been asking for). I guess for an anniversary this is okay though? I'm also going to get him a few other little knicknacks like a book he's been wanting and some clothes.

 

[Mara]

Can you design something using Photoshop or similar like an IOU certificate for Engagement Photo Session? Print it on an ivory or linen cardstock for a bit of elegance?

For Xmas one of the gifts I gave Greg was Cirque du Soleil tickets to the traveling one in our city this month and I had bough the tickets online so they were print at home tickets. Not exactly a fabulous gift, here's your 8x11 paper tickets! So I printed them out, folded them up, scanned the front page of the brochure that I had picked up somewhere, and then cropped it out and printed it in color on cardstock. Then I cut that out, put it into a clear plastic card case I had and put the folded papers/tickets inside. So when he opened the gift he just saw the brochure cover through the clear sleeve and then opened it to find the tickets. It wasn't SUPER fantastic but I used what I had in the house at the time. What could be cute is if you did an IOU cert and then you could print it out, glue it to some colored cardstock (aka ivory on sage or similar) then punch small holes and string tiny satin ribbon along the top or something fun. Then you could put it into an envelope (matching to cardstock or similar) and then punch a hole in the envelope and tie it with the ribbon to one of the other gifts you are getting him, aka the books or something.

For the cardstock and ribbon etc if you have a craft store or a stamping store around, or even a Michaels, that'd be perfect. For the certificate, if you cannot create one from scratch, maybe see if you can find a template onlline or something that you can save?

Just some ideas, good luck! I actually want to give Greg (and me) private ballroom dancing lessons for VDay so I also have to figure out how to creatively package that as well!

Oh and I think it's a fabulous gift..you guys know you are getting engaged so I don't think it's jumping the gun necesarily.

 

[monarch64]

I don''t think you should worry that the gift is not something he specifically wants for himself...it is your anniversary as a couple, not his birthday or Christmas/Hannukah gift. I think it''s a great idea to give the photo package. About presenting...could you print up something in a nice, colorful font on good paper on your computer? Does the photographer offer gift certificates? My DH took me to Mexico when we first started dating and printed up his own invite to me on his computer--it was really sweet and personal. Also, since you''re throwing in some "extra" gifts just for him, I don''t think he''ll be too disappointed that you didn''t get him like, a huge plasma t.v. or anything! Hope this helps!

 

[decodelighted]

Did you post this idea because you wanted feedback? Other suggestions?

It's just my opinion but something about the "engagement picture" package seems controlling. You said "photographer I like" "I want it to match" me, me, me ... an anniversary gift, especially a FIRST anniversary gift - when you're expecting a HUGE gift like an e-ring from him, seems like it should be JUST about HIM, HIM, HIM.

If you want to manage the e-pictures AFTER YOU'RE ENGAGED so be it. But I would leave all post-engagment stuff alone for now until he proposes. Leave SOMETHING for him to do so he can feel he "started the engagment ball rolling" at that point. Not like ... everythings all planned out I just have to hand over the ring.

Does that make sense? I don't think you're being selfish ... I just think you're excited and in a rush to have everything just so. Relax. Take a minute to focus on the awesome man you're gonna marry & pick something that he will truly, truly love.

Suggestions w/o knowing him:

Engraved pocket watch or cigar case or picture frame w/photo of 2 of you now
First edition of his fave book
Collectable ## of something he collects
Tickets to an event you wouldn't normally accompany him to, but go anyway

 

[ellewoods]

I agree with Deco.

Why don''t you save the engagement pic package as a gift or contribution after you get engaged? I don''t know your situation, i.e. are you guys unofficially engaged but waiting for the ring? Or you both picked out the ring and you''re just waiting for him to officially propose? Does he know, that you know, that he''s waiting for the ring?

Its understandable you''re excited about getting engaged and you want to get nice engagement pictures. But I just don''t think its the right time/occassion to give this gift/contribution to your boyfriend. I think you should get him a gift that''s entirely geared towards him (new Ipod, TV, expensive watch) or get a gift that''s geared towards the both of you as a couple -- season tickets to a local sports team, season tickets to the local playhouse, concert tickets, etc -- but NOT geared towards a wedding, as you''re not engaged yet.

I don''t mean any offense here, I''m just adding my feedback. The engagement pic package just doesn''t seem like a true "gift" -- as you will benefit from it equally (if not more) than he will, and it seems to me to be part of the overall wedding planning process/expenses rather than a seperate, individual gift. I mean it almost feels like a situation where for your anniversary, you''re giving your boyfriend the gift of the wedding invitations you want. Its a gift that''s a part of the whole wedding process, and doesn''t benefit anyone seperately.

A gift that I''d think is wedding related but still seperate and would make a good gift would be something like a gift certificate for your boyfriend to get a massage -- and you can explain its to use for a day or two before the wedding for him to relax.

 

[E B]

I have to agree with Deco.

The engagement ring he's dropping a pretty penny on is for you and you alone. I think it'd only be fair for you to get him something he's really been wanting...something for him and him alone. The engagement pictures can come after, when you'll both be able to sit down and agree on something. Otherwise, you get a gift and a half, and he's left with a half. After I received my engagement ring (a couple of days before our 2nd anniversary), I bought Joey an X-Box 360. It's of no use to me, but he absolutely loves it.

If an engagement ring wasn't in play, I'd say go for it. But it is, and it's probably costing him more than anything he's ever spent for himself. Treat him to something like he's treating you to something.

ETA: Elle, I didn't even see your post! I didn't copy it, I swear!

 

[Mara]

without knowing her boyfriend...i wanted to chime in and say that Greg doesn't like when i give him gifts that are just for him or can't be used by both of us or things that HE deems useless. that's what kind of guy he is, he also doesn't like gifts anyway in general...haha. so by doing something like dancing lessons for us or the cirque (or the engagement photos which is something i'd probably think of doing) it's something we will be doing together and it makes him feel like the money isn't WASTED if that makes sense because it's something we'd do anyway and now it's just a gift.

now not knowing PG's boyfriend...it's hard to estimate what he will find the perfect gift. but if the ring is being made and she knows it is and he knows she knows then something like this could be a really sweet way for her to say she's looking forward to the engagement or similar. also including something like a heartfelt letter or poem may also get that point across, i don't see it so much as controlling things as just trying to be practical (which most guys appreciate!) but also romantic in a way. just some thoughts!

unless of course he has been DYING for something like a big ole TV and you are getting him this instead then i think you have to go with what's in your HEART as the right gift for your anniversary since an anniversary is about you both...for me i am not considering the ring as the anniversary gift (unless that's what it is?) because to me the ring is entirely separate from an anniverary and it is not given with thought of getting something in return, so maybe that's where it's different.

 

[sunkist]

I just wanted to say, Mara, I''m so jealous you are getting dancing lessons for you and hubby!! I''ve been dying to do that with my BF. Someday we will...!!!

 

[Mara]

Haha sunkist...we adore the Dancing with the Stars show and have grand ''delusions'' that we''ll maybe one day be like that....the show that is on right now, Jerry Rice and his partner are practicing/training at this ballroom place local to us, so I figured well why not just bite the bullet and get us something like this for VDay so we can both Live the Dream, LOL. Now how it turns out, aka if we learn anything, that''s another matter!!

The part I am struggling with is that they want us to come in for a free private consultation I guess to see how rythmic (or not) we are and then they make suggestions on what dances we may be best for, how often to come, and this and that....well obviously we can''t do that until after VDay since it''s a gift, so I am going to have to figure out an IOU kind of thing for the gift and then schedule our first free thing for after VDay.

 

[peonygirl]

Thanks for all the feedback thus far! We went to the mall today and I got him 2 pairs of jeans and a sweater as an early gift.

I honestly only thought of the engagement pic package because he is so, so hard to buy for! I really wanted to get us a nice vacation somewhere, but that is way out of budget (I'm a grad student). The only technology-related thing he wants is a new computer, but for the type of data analysis he does for work that would be 3-4K. There were no plays or events that immediately sounded like something we'd really love (he's not really a sports guy). He likes movies but there's no DVDs he currently wants. He is a very casual dresser when he's not at the hospital seeing patients, so something like cufflinks wouldn't work. I already got him a watch that he seldom wears because it's so "fancy" (his words). When I asked him what he wanted for our anniversary, he named a physics book (gotta love the nerds!) he wanted and a electric razor. I got him the book and will be giving him an electric razor for Valentine's day.

Perhaps I should just give him the picture package but bill it as a couples photo session versus an engagement package? Ugh, I wish I hadn't waited until the last minute to do this. He told me today that he was planning to propose *before* our anniversary because I wasn't expecting a proposal until afterwards, but the ring wasn't ready yet (that's how I know that's all he's waiting on).

Does anyone have any more feedback? I'm a little stumped.

 

[Mara]

PG I say go with your heart...all our advice is well and good but this is your man and your life with him, your heart will know what to do that is best and what he will appreciate!!! Good luck (and personally I still think your original idea is just fine!!).

 

[nytemist]

peonygirl- I''m in your shoes! Our 5 year is on Thursday and I have no clue what to do. Since moving into his condo he NEEDS a stereo, but he''s so picky I don''t want to spend all that money and have him not like it. Very specific about music and he has 1000+ CDs so I don''t buy him music. Particular about movies, books, ****, guitar strings, clothes, restaurants, not really into sports (only watches football because I do) it goes on. Apparently, he is actually planning something really special this year for me, but I''m not to know what. Neither of us like taking pictures( that will be hard come wedding time) Sorry I can''t offer suggestions, but if something occurs to you, share!!