If I want it to be everything I dream of, did I think about it for too long?

[mayachel]

After seeing a venue this weekend that was nearly perfect, I''m stuck. I feel like the parameters we need for size, (150-170), cost (around $100pp), must-have (outdoor ceremony space PLUS indoor ceremony space jic it rains). Has been pretty limited. We found a place that fits these wishes, PLUS has a very good food reputation, super clean, newly renovated and has an Inn attached. What''s not to like?

Well, I''m just not crazy about the outdoor ceremony location. It isn''t anything bad, it just isn''t how I imagined my wedding once I started trying to do so. Still...it is a great deal, great food, decent location, well-known wedding venue.

I feel as though I have scoured the area for options and am fresh out of ideas. Briefly we considered having the ceremony on my parent''s wooded property but remembered (thankfully) how many horseflies and no-seeums are out at dusk, mid-august.

We have our date on hold for two weeks. Should we just say yes and be done with it?

 

[marchswallowbird]

Yes, you should. You can dress up the location to look better. If what you imagined doesn't match reality, you need to compromise and get on with things.

 

[AmberGretchen]

I think you and I are similar - I want everything to be perfect and feel the need to know absolutely everything about absolutely every option before moving forward.

That said, I''d do some honest thinking about how much you think it will bother you that the ceremony space isn''t "perfect." If you think its something you will really regret down the line, I''d keep looking. But if you think you can get past it by focusing on other aspects of the wedding and/or using decorations, etc...to make it closer to what you''d dreamed of, then I''d say go for it.

 

[EmptyLeftHand]

go for it.
There will never be the place, and if it is, it will cost a bomb.

It sounds like it ticks lots of boxes! and with decorations will be just as nice as you can make it.

xx

 

[Winslet]

Hmmm. As someone who deliberates EVERYTHING in life to the point of absurdity, I definitely feel your pain on this! I would say to keep looking over the next two weeks, but if you don''t find anything else then do book the venue. At least you''ll have the peace of mind knowing that you gave yourself a deadline, stuck with it, and didn''t miss the boat on a really great place. I wish you the best of luck with your decision, let us know what you decide!

 

[NakedFinger]

It is amazing what a talented event designer can do to an outdoor space. If this ceremony location isn''t exactly what you were hoping for, or is just a little "plain" for you, you can definitely create the ambiance you are looking for. For example, hanging chandeliers outside (who knew??? lol), adding trees, creating a dramatic Alter/Chuppah, brining in a gazebo, etc. It really depends on what you are looking for and what your budget allows. But I think a 30 min ceremony location isn''t enough to rule out everything else you love about the space.

Also, a lot of venues have access to previous weddings. Ask the venue if they can email you some pictures of ceremonies held there before. Sometimes getting a visual of what can be done, and getting ideas from previous weddings can really help "sell" it for you.

 

[mayachel]

Thank you everyone for your sage perspective. I do believe that you are right, I just needed to hear it.

Marchswallowbird-I totally get the "get on with things" and sums up my state of mind quite well. The more I look, and don''t find "it" the more frustrated I get.

Amber and Winslet-My kindred sisters. Yes! Think, obsess, explore all options...

EmptyLeftHand-it does tick a lot of boxes. Thank you for helping me see the big picture.

NakedFinger-I did see some photos with the wc when I visited. Mostly at the time, she was pushing that the chairs could only be set in one fashion (in the round). I was too put off by her unwillingness to consider a different arrangement that I didn''t really pay much attention to the idea of changing up the ambiance. That sounds like a good idea.

 

[NakedFinger]

Date: 5/6/2009 11:02:03 AM
Author: mayachel
Thank you everyone for your sage perspective. I do believe that you are right, I just needed to hear it.

Marchswallowbird-I totally get the ''get on with things'' and sums up my state of mind quite well. The more I look, and don''t find ''it'' the more frustrated I get.

Amber and Winslet-My kindred sisters. Yes! Think, obsess, explore all options...

EmptyLeftHand-it does tick a lot of boxes. Thank you for helping me see the big picture.

NakedFinger-I did see some photos with the wc when I visited. Mostly at the time, she was pushing that the chairs could only be set in one fashion (in the round). I was too put off by her unwillingness to consider a different arrangement that I didn''t really pay much attention to the idea of changing up the ambiance. That sounds like a good idea.

Ugh- I am a wedding planner, and can I tell you there is nothing more frustrating to me than when a vendor is so set in their ways, they are scared to do something different. Like "this is the way we always do it". Yes, there is probably a "norm" for them, but that doesnt mean that every single wedding has to be a carbon copy of each other you know? Who wants a cookie cutter wedding anyway? Anything can be done with creativity and a willingness to think outside of the box. So before deciding to book the venue, I would express to your contact what you want, and make sure they commit to that.

(ok vent over...sorry!

)

 

[mayachel]

NF-Nothing like a good soap box to get your point out there. It''s a good reminder that they are helping the bride, not the other way around. That being said, my idea may really have not been feasible, I just couldn''t imagine I was the only one to have ever asked. Her response was so incredibly "this is the way we always do it".