If you''re not having attendants...

[zoebartlett]

...who helps you get ready before the wedding? I just realized this and I''m not sure what to do. We''re not having attendants for a few reasons: 1) although not an older couple by any means, at 35 and 33 respectively, my FI and I feel like we''ve "outgrown" the need for groomsmen and bridesmaids, and 2) my FI would have a very hard time choosing who to ask. He is from a big family (4 siblings, all of whom are older by a number of years) and not particularly close to his brothers. That didn''t sound right. Everyone gets along but they never hang out or get together unless it''s for a specific purpose...holidays, graduations, etc. My FI also doesn''t have a lot of his own guy friends. Sure, he''s inviting friends to the wedding but asking any of them to stand up for my FI during the ceremony would seem...fake. I have one sister and I know that if I DID have anyone in my wedding, it would be her. I don''t want to choose between my friends, so I''d just have a MOH. I''m not sure she''d want the title though.

So, if you were in this sitaution, what did you do while getting ready? Who helped you?

 

[surfgirl]

I''ll be a similar situation and am hoping my best friend from college will be there to help me get ready...though I chose my dress and ensemble based on whether or not I could get dressed myself! Worst case scenario, my FI''s best man''s wife but she''s a handful so I''m hoping that my friend will be there. Will you be in a hotel situation? If so, you could have someone from housekeeping come help you. But if you''ve got sisters coming just ask them to help you get dressed. I''m sure it would be a lovely experience for you all to share.

 

[Pandora II]

All my bridesmaids are 12 years old and younger, so I will get my mother and youngest sister to help me.

 

[KimberlyH]

We skipped on attendants too; my mom and favorite aunt helped me get dressed.

 

[Independent Gal]

I won''t be having attendants, as I think my friends would find it weird and I certainly don''t want them all matchy matchy.

However, I DO want my very best friends and my sister (and step-sisters?) with me when I''m getting dressed on the day. So what I''m going to do is invite them to be ''fake bridesmaids''. I was actually just talking to a good friend aobut this and I said: "There will be no dress. There will be no hair-do''s. There will be no formal photos. There will be no time-consuming or expensive ''duties''. There will be no bridezilla. There will just be us, me and my closest dearest, most loved gals, chillin'' and drinkin'' champagne before I take the big plunge. Plus I''ll probably need help with the zippers."

 

[neatfreak]

We''re not having attendants, but I have invited my closest female friends to come get ready with me that morning and they''re all planning on coming and having breakfast with me and doing some fun girly stuff!

 

[zoebartlett]

Thanks surfgirl! We''re getting married at a restaurant/wedding venue and they have a bridal room that brides can get ready in. I may just ask my mom and sister to help out. I didn''t want my mom to have any responsibilities the day of, since she''s contributing so much already. But I''m sure she''d be happy to help. I''m sure my sister would help if needed as well. When she got married, she wore palazzo (sp?) pants, a white tank top, and birks. Needless to say, she didn''t need any help. THere were no "getting ready" shots done by the photographer either (the photographer was a male friend).

 

[zoebartlett]

So I guess it''s not as uncommon as I thought. Thanks for the replies! Pandora, all of your BMs are 12 and under? How cute! I really like the idea of asking my friends to come and get ready with me. I hadn''t really thought of asking them but it''s something to think about. IG, you sound just like my sister! She even

when someone asked her what her dress looked like. THis person obviously didn''t know my sister too well.

I have plenty of time to think this through but I thought I''d put it out there anyway.

 

[Independent Gal]

OH, hey, Zoe, I meant no ''bridesmaid dress''. As for me, I''m sure as heck getting a dress and a hair-do! though it might not be a wedding dress. At the moment, I''m covetting a Fendi number that is spectacular, white, and re-wearable because not really bride-y. When we''re in NYC next week, I''m totally trying it on!

If not that (or if it''s 10K), I have my eye on a short, plain Oscar de la Renta with ostrich feather petticoat. Cool!

 

[zoebartlett]

Ahhh, got it, IG! I''d love to see the dress or dresses you find if you feel like posting.

 

[sumbride]

I don''t know what your mom is like, but with most moms, you''d be hard pressed to keep her AWAY from helping you put on your dress! that''s one of the most traditional MOB "duties". It won''t be that hard on her physically, but I''m sure she''ll shed a tear or two!!!

 

[littlelysser]

I haven''t gotten married yet, and my sis is standing with me, but I''m not really having attendants. One of my best friends help me put on my dress a few weeks back, so she''s the designated dress putter onner. I''d imagine most of my girlfriends will be buzzing around as I get ready...we''re getting married in a backyard and I''ll get my dress on in my friend''s bedroom...so yeah, I''m not too worried!

 

[littlelysser]

Oh yeah, and I pretty much assumed my Mom would be there. Maybe Fi''s mom. And my sis, of course.

 

[E B]

My mom, my mom''s friend, and my friends will all help me get dressed. Just ''cause they aren''t bridesmaids doesn''t mean they won''t be with me all day!