Invitation Etiquette

[soulsis]

I need some help with wording on my invites. To be honest, DF and I have been living together quite a while and do not really require any household items. Is there a way to casually "hint" at something without sounding tacky? My GF had put this on her invitations and I thought it was a great idea.

"In lieu of gifts please feel free to contribute to our honeymoon fund".

It worked for her, but I don''''t want it to sound bad.

 

[ammayernyc]

I am all in favor of registering and basically expecting gifts from people if they attend your wedding (unless it''s a big desitination wedding or something that they have to spend a lot of money on just to attend). However, to include anything about gift on your invitation is tacky. Maybe include a separate slip explaining that you have a honeymoon registry (there are such places). But I don''t think you should put anything on the inviation itself.

 

[soulsis]

Sorry, I should have mentioned that we were thinking of putting it with the invitations, not "on". The honeymoon registry is a great idea!

 

[lilyinct]

I totally agree with AP- I think it''s really tasteless and tacky to put anything about gifts on the wedding invitation...we didn''t register anywhere, and when people called and asked us where we were registered, we told them that we weren''t registered- and our gifts were 99% cash and gift certificates.

Good luck!

 

[lilyinct]

Just read your last post- I wouldn''t put anything related to gifts in the same envelope as the wedding invite- it kind of makes it look like you''re inviting people just for the gifts...

 

[ammayernyc]

I have been to upwards of 15 weddings in the last four years and I honestly think that all of them included where they were registered. I would never go to a wedding and not give a gift. I just think that''s bad ettiquette.

 

[PaulaW]

Personally, I would not include anything on or in with the invitations mentioning gifts. It''s a huge no-no. Leave it up to your wedding party and parents to clue in people about gifts or if someone asks you directly, mention you are not registered. Since you''ve lived together for so long, people will probably assume you don''t need anything.

 

[rms]

I was once told about someone receiving an invitation saying that the bride and groom were registered at their local bank.

I do not think that anything with respect to gifts/registries should be included. Leave it up to word of mouth. When people ask you or your family, tell them what you'd like, and word will spread quickly. That's what we did.

 

[FireGoddess]

My best friend had been living with her boyfriend for 6 or 7 years before they got married, and like you, had most things they needed. I was the maid of honor and the bride did not include any gift information in the wedding invitation mailing. On the bridal shower invitations I sent, I wrote, "The couple is registered at Bed, Bath, and Beyond or alternatively, would welcome contributions to their honeymoon fund." They had only registered for a handful of items at the store, so they mostly got cash for the honeymoon. I believe correct etiquette is that no gift information is ever to be put in the wedding invitation mailing, and that guests will find out from bridal shower invitations, the wedding party, or by asking you.

ETA: As NJC said below, I also had a wedding website, and my registry info was on it. When I sent my save the date cards, all the pertinent info was on the website including local hotels, etc.

 

[njc]

One of the main reasons i created a wedding website for us was to publish our registry info for guests. I included the URL on a seperate peice of paper in the invitaion. Of course there was other cool info on the website, but it was my way of getting around proper ettiquette.