Is this a bad date???

[lovelylulu]

one place that i absolutely love as a wedding venue only has one more weekend left and it is

JULY 7th/8th

Do you think that is a terrible weekend because of a possible conflict with the 4th of July. It''s tough because the 4th is a tuesday and i would have the reception on the following saturday, but because of the location most people would likely be traveling up on friday and staying over...what do you all think

i bet if i get a save the date card out now people would reserve the time, but how would you feel if you got an invitation for that weekend?

 

[lmurden]

Go for it, and send those save the dates out ASAP!

 

[pebbles]

Well, this isn''t exactly the same situation, but a few years ago one of my girlfriends got married on July 5, which was a Saturday. There were many people (not me) that were upset b/c they normally go out of town or do things with their families 4th of July weekend and couldn''t because of her wedding. Granted, in the grand scheme of things, their wedding is a once in a lifetime thing, and they can do the vacations or other things with their families all the other years, but none the less, it did create a lot of turmoil for my friend. She got a lot of slack for having it on a holiday weekend, and she said she wishes she had picked another weekend alltogether.

Your weekend may run into the problem of those people taking time to travel for 4th of July taking more time to travel for your wedding. You may want to ask those close to you (i.e. immediate family) if it would be an issue having it that weekend, especially since the reception locale is only available that weekend.

Keep in mind that there is no perfect date for everyone. Someone will always balk no matter what weekend you chose. For us, getting married in August, we had a few people that couldn''t come b/c they were bringing their kids to college that weekend.

Try not to stress too much about it. If you have your heart set on that place and it''s the only time they have open, then go for it. Just be prepared that some people may not be happy.

Good luck.

 

[curlygirl]

I agree with pebbles, you can''t please everyone! There is never going to be the perfect date when everyone is going to be able to make it. But this is YOUR wedding. I also agree that you should check with immediate family and very close friends to make sure they don''t have any conflicts because those are the people that you really want to be there. Once you have determined those things, if that is the only date the place is available and you are in love with it, GO FOR IT! Keep us posted!

 

[researcher]

My friend got married the weekend before the 4th this year, and it was just fine. In fact, it was a great time because some people made it an extended vacation (the 1st-5th). I could see the same happening with the week after the 4th. I don''t think the 4th is a big enough holiday for there to be conflict (it''s not like Thanksgiving or Christmas/Hanukkah where people are known to travel).

I say go for it!!!

 

[eks6426]

I got married on July 3, 2005. I did have some people balk at the weekend because they normally do family things. In order to make it work for me, I discussed it with the few people I really wanted to be there...parents, maid of honor etc. to make sure THEY could make it. Everyone else, I just accepted that they might not be able to come and left it at that. We had a few people not come, but for the most part they did.

If that''s the only weekend left, I''d go for it.

 

[aljdewey]

I married on July 11, 2004.....exactly a week after the 4th, and no problems.

Everyone came, and no complaints.

 

[icekid]

totally agree with everyone else- if that weekend is perfect for you, do it. you might lose a few guests, but the important ones will still be there!

 

[heart prongs]

It''s not the 4th, but the weekend after, so I would think you''ll be just fine. I would imagine 7/4 festivities would take place the weekend before since the holiday falls early in the week.

Now, in terms of an actual 7/4 wedding...I''d advise against that if at all possible. We look forward to the same camping trip every year. If a close friend or family member were getting married, we''d certainly attend, but we''d rather not get all dressed up and have a sit down dinner on a cookout with jean shorts and old navy flag tank top, hot dog and hamburger eating day! I think many would agree.

klr

prongs

 

[Tybee]

How cool is 7/7 as your anniversary?
I say go for it!
If people can''t make it, well then heck, they can''t!

 

[muddleheaded]

I think it''s fine. Independence Day shouldn''t conflict, as others have pointed out. Moreover, I know multiple couples who were married over the July 4 weekend, so I wouldn''t worry about it even if it did conflict. There will always be reasons why some people can''t attend regardless of what day you pick.

 

[flopkins]

I would talk to the ppl that are super duper important to me, see if they''re fine w/it, and then book it!!!

 

[selflove]

I guess if you were expecting a lot of out-of-towners then a holiday weekend would be perfect for them to travel to your wedding. But if most of the people you plan to invite live in your area, they may not feel so inclined to stay in town for one day (or night). But in the end, if that''s the weekend you need to do it to get the venue you want, then you''ll have to adjust your frame of mind to "I don''t care" if some people decide not to come. Doesn''t seem like it''s such a big travel weekend anyways so hopefully you''re safe!

Can you post some pictures of the site? Is this the $155/pp site?

 

[ellewoods]

As far as it possibly interfering with the July 4 holiday, I wouldn''t worry about it. As long as you send save the dates well in advance, people can decide whether or not they''re going to make a trip to your location their 4th of July "event," as well as being there to attend your wedding.

Here''s where I don''t like the date though....just speaking from experience as a wedding guest. Some very good friends decided to get married on Memorial Day weekend. I didn''t mind that I would have to spend that weekend at the location where their wedding was, that didn''t bother me at all. There weren''t any other events going on that I absolutely HAD to go to that would have meant I''d miss the wedding. I can''t imagine anyone having something more important on a holiday like Memorial Day or 4th of July than a friend/family member''s wedding....so don''t worry about that part.

Here''s what WAS a problem. They got married in a nice beach resort town, which is pricey as far as hotels anyway. This part didn''t bother me, as it was beautiful and they should have got married wherever they wanted. But since they chose Memorial Day weekend, all of the hotels had a 3 night minimum, some even a 4 night minimum. Prices were also hiked up for the holiday weekend. And these were all very expensive hotels -- the cheapest you could find was about $195/night. Most people lived within a couple hours driving distance, so it would have been feasible to drive to the location on Friday, go to the wedding on Saturday, and then go home Sunday. But since the hotels all had 3 night minimums, all the guests had to stay 1 night longer (at least).

It''s not that I wasn''t happy to make a weekend out of the wedding, etc. it was just that it made everything A LOT more expensive for all of the guests. An extra night at the hotel might not seem like much, but after sending an engagement gift, getting them a very nice wedding gift from their registry...BF having spent a lot of money going to the bachelor party....etc...it really added up. I love them, and I wasn''t angry or annoyed then, and I''m not now, but I do remember that it really was a burden financially.

So I''d vote for you to have the wedding the weekend after, to avoid any holiday price-hike problems and also 4th of July issues.

 

[lovelylulu]

here are some links to places we are considering:

http://www.thecentralparkboathouse.com/ -- this is the place that is $155/person


http://www.tierramar.com/ -- this is the place in the hamptons


http://www.thecastle-vt.com


http://www.buttermilkfallsinn.com


the castle is my newest obsession and it is the july dates 7/8th only.

most of my family is coming from ny and same for him so we are wondering if VT is too far to make people travel. i think that it''s about 4.5 hours from NYC...

opinions are always welcome

 

[ellewoods]

Hi Lulu.

All of those places would be beautiful! Although I have to say that my favorite is the Atlantica one in the Hamptons. The picture gallery has such beautiful shots of the location and it''s right on the beach which I think is perfect!

A couple months ago I was walking through Central Park on a Saturday and there was a wedding/reception at the Boat House. At first I thought it was an amazing place to get married and have the reception, until I saw the bride and groom with their photographer trying to take pictures. While it would be very neat to get married in Central Park, I felt bad for the bride and groom. While there was a seperate large room sectioned off for the reception, there were tons of strangers, tourists, etc. hanging out around the area, and eating/drinking, etc. on the main side of the Boat House. It just didn''t seem closed off enough for me. There was too much outside/nonwedding/tourist and stranger activity. Of course that''s the point of Central Park, I know, but I think it would be frustrating to get married there. I would imagine in the summer it would be even worse. There are also these public bathrooms right outside the Boat House where many people were in line for the bathroom. I imagine the Boat House has their own bathrooms inside (I hope!!) but the public ones were very messy and gross....and there was a continuous crowd coming to use them.

I also really liked the Vermont one, I love that it is right on the lake. I don''t think it''s too far to have family and friends come 4 hours out of New York....but I was wondering if there are many other lodging options in the area because it didn''t look like the hotel could accomodate many guests.

Thanks so much for sharing your planning details....I love reading about them!

 

[aphisiglovessae]

I''m getting married on July 8th and no one has brought up that kind of conflict to us, as of yet. I think they would just consider it an extended vacation with extra fun.

 

[BrightSpot]

I think the date you've chosen should be fine, but it might be a good idea to send out save-the-dates so your guests can block off the date in advance.

I absolutely love every potential site you posted, but they all seem very different. Which appeals to you more--a beach wedding, a city wedding, or a country wedding? All could be charming in their own ways. (Though it might be more comfortable getting married in VT in July than in NYC.

This coming from a girl who's getting married in Jamaica...

)

Elle's right that you'll have a lot of extra witnesses if you get married in Central Park. You might enjoy that or you might not, depending on your personality. I'm sure you could use the indoor bathrooms, but would there be other parties in the Boathouse, or would you rent the whole thing for your reception?

I don't think VT is too far from NY, but if most of your guests are from NYC, would it be difficult for them to get there? (rent a car, etc.) What are the travel options?

This is exciting...so many wonderful choices!

ETA: I just found your other post where you said, "i'm very much in love with the idea of a more garden/tented wedding -- though a tent at a place where it's something like an inn or b&b so there is are bathrooms, etc."

Maybe you should go for the venue in VT or the Butterfield Inn?

 

[lovelylulu]

Thanks for the feedback so far.

i think that they are all very beautiful. it is exciting!!! but it''s also such a hard decision. you want to find the best place with the best price. somewhere that we love, but that isn''t too hard for our guests.

elle: i always thought i wanted an ocean wedding, but i''ve been to a few and i just felt like there was something missing. hard to articulate... but it could have been that it wasn''t MY wedding and i would do it differently, so i''m not yet crossing atlantica off the list. my mother is also searching out some more possible spots...

right now, i would go for the castle hill in vermont. it looks gorgeous. i''ve read things from others who have had their own wedding there and they loved it. they have a wedding coordinator which would be KEY since i''m down here in DC and long distance can be tough. i also love the tent, but it''s a more permanent kind of tent which is so pretty! i''m only worried about losing people that can''t make it a "weekend" wedding. i know the main people will come, but i don''t want to exclude people that would come if it were closer. however, staying the night or two in vermont is a lot cheaper than staying over in the hamptons...

over christmas we''re going to try to take a look at some of the places.