Junior & Senior on invite??? Help!

[robbie3982]

FI is a junior and his father is a senior. This is the wording that my mom sent me to approve for the invites:

Mr. and Mrs. Robbie3982''s Parents
and
Mr. and Mrs. FI''s Parents, Sr.
request the honour of your company
at the marriage of their children

Robin Kimberly Last Name

and

Thomas Robert Last Name, Jr.

On Saturday, the eighth of September
Two thousand and seven
at five-thirty in the afternoon
The Name of the Location Here
Address of the location here (no zip included)

Reception immediately following ceremony





Complimentary valet service available on Cherry Way (off South Main Street) but please allow extra time for parking

 

[robbie3982]

I highlighted everything that I have questions on.

I''ve seen sites that say that Jr. and Sr. should be written out and others that say to abbreviate them. Is one more formal than the other? If you''re abbreviating, do you use a comma like in the wording my parents sent me?

Should the time be written as five-thirty or as half past five? We''re not getting married in a religious setting (not sure if that influences how it should be written).

Are you supposed to include the zip code? We have a lot of people coming from out of state and all the invitation currently has is Name of town, PA. Is it common to leave the zip code off?

Last, but not least, is it ok to put that part about valet parking on the invite?

 

[surfgirl]

I dont think it looks weird to say the abbreviated Sr/Jr on the invite but I would write out "half past five" since that''s usually how it is written. Why dont you consult an Emily Post Manners book on the Sr/Jr thing? I''m sure they mention that in those books.

 

[cara]

Revised version:

Mr. and Mrs. Robbie3982''s Parents
and
Mr. and Mrs. FI''s Parents, senior
request the honour of your company
at the marriage of their children

Robin Kimberly Last Name
and
Thomas Robert Last Name, junior

Saturday, the eighth of September
Two thousand seven
half after five o''clock
Location Name
Optional Street address IF no direction/map enclosure
City, State

Reception immediately following
-----

Notes:
-NO VALET INFO on the invite. You need an enclosure card for valet info.
-NO ZIP - trust me, google can find it with just city and state.
-You can use "Jr." and "Sr." if needed for space reasons, but written out uncapitalized is more correct
-half after/past five o''clock is more appropriate
-and I removed some extra words in the second half that are properly omitted but its really a stylistic choice, so you can add them back in if you like more verbiage rather than the standard bullet point invite format:
"On" in the date line
"and" in the year line
"in the afternoon" in the time line (no one reasonably thinks five in the morning is a wedding time)
"ceremony" in the reception following line
-"request honour of your company" is a blend of the two more traditional lines: "request honour of your presence" (specific to weddings in a house of worship) and "request pleasure of your company". No problem if its the wording you want, just be consistent about using or not using British spellings throughout.

 

[Pandora II]

Personally, I prefer:

at Half past Five

No need to put afternoon.

I also like:

Two thousand and Seven.

Reception to follow

I would leave out the zip code. I can''t really help on the Senior/Junior problem. I have consulted Debrett''s Correct Form which has a US section and they don''t have anything on that. In the UK we would just have the two names and reckon everyone will understand - it''s more normal here to call kids after grandparents rather than parents I think so it rarely crops up.

The valet stuff should go on an insert card - perhaps with a little map and the full address and zip code (and your website details).

 

[VRBeauty]

If your last names are the same as your parents', then I think the traditional form is that your last name and your fiancee's are not listed on the invite. So it would read:

Mr. and Mrs. Robbie3982's Parents
and
Mr. and Mrs. FI's Parents
request the honour of your company
at the marriage of their children
Robin Kimberly

and
Thomas Robert




I trust that anyone invited to the wedding will know which "child" belongs to which parents!

My personal feeling is that the Sr. and Jr. is unnecessary in this case -- when there are only two, it's clear that the father is the "senior" and the other is the "junior" -- but I think it's a matter of personal preference. (I'm assuming the parents part will include their first names, or at least the fathers' first names.) Including "Sr. and Jr." would be kind of like announcing the birth of a son not named after his father as "the first."

You don't need a zip code in in the invite because it's not information your guests will need to find their way to your wedding.

Not Emily Post, but that's my "plain jane" take on your question!

 

[robbie3982]

Thanks everyone! It turns out you can either write out senior/junior or use the abbreviations. They always follow a comma. When using the abbreviation, the J or S is capitalized, but when writing out the whole word, it''s lowercase.

According to the book that I have.

Neither FI, my dad nor I like the valet info being on the invite. My mom is the only one who wants it there. Hopefully she''ll listen to us and take it off.

I definitely prefer "half past five" to "five-thirty."

As far as having our full names, from the examples that I''ve seen (in my planning book and online) when both parents are hosting, the full names of both the bride and groom are used. Plus, I like the formality that our full names give it.

 

[door knob solitaire]

Robbie,

You said they are senior and junior respectfully...but are they BOTH Thomas Robert? There are many Sr. and Jr. that do not share the same middle name...in your case, though, are you saying they do?

If so, is one known as Tom and the other Thomas...or do people call them both Thomas?

DKS

 

[Samantha Red]

Just my two pennies from across the Atlantic. I would personally represent the time numerically- they always are here in the UK and I think it makes it more straightforward and not so wordy. I know this a cultural thing, but half after five would just confuse me (not diffcult I know LOL). I would be wondering half what? I am going to for 2.00pm on invitations.

With regard to info like valet parking, I would put a mini info pack in with the invitation explaining things like that, you could even put the full address, including zip code in there, if you feel happier furnishing people with that information

Ultimately, as is said so frequently on these forums, it is your wedding, you should do what makes you and your bloke happy.

 

[blushingbride]

Date: 6/3/2007 1:15:13 PM
Author: cara
Revised version:

Mr. and Mrs. Robbie3982''s Parents
and
Mr. and Mrs. FI''s Parents, senior
request the honour of your company
at the marriage of their children

Robin Kimberly Last Name
and
Thomas Robert Last Name, junior

Saturday, the eighth of September
Two thousand seven
half after five o''clock
Location Name
Optional Street address IF no direction/map enclosure
City, State

Reception immediately following
-----

Notes:
-NO VALET INFO on the invite. You need an enclosure card for valet info.
-NO ZIP - trust me, google can find it with just city and state.
-You can use ''Jr.'' and ''Sr.'' if needed for space reasons, but written out uncapitalized is more correct
-half after/past five o''clock is more appropriate
-and I removed some extra words in the second half that are properly omitted but its really a stylistic choice, so you can add them back in if you like more verbiage rather than the standard bullet point invite format:
''On'' in the date line
''and'' in the year line
''in the afternoon'' in the time line (no one reasonably thinks five in the morning is a wedding time)
''ceremony'' in the reception following line
-''request honour of your company'' is a blend of the two more traditional lines: ''request honour of your presence'' (specific to weddings in a house of worship) and ''request pleasure of your company''. No problem if its the wording you want, just be consistent about using or not using British spellings throughout.

I completely agree with everything Cara suggested - I think she hit the nail on the head for all appropriate wording. Also, please do not put the valet information on the invite! Use a seperate "Additional Information Card" that has all those important details. It just looks tacky on the invite.

 

[robbie3982]

Date: 6/4/2007 1:28:17 AM
Author: door knob solitaire
Robbie,

You said they are senior and junior respectfully...but are they BOTH Thomas Robert? There are many Sr. and Jr. that do not share the same middle name...in your case, though, are you saying they do?

If so, is one known as Tom and the other Thomas...or do people call them both Thomas?

DKS

They have the same middle name and both go by Tom, though FI''s immediately family does sometimes call him Tommy. My understanding is that you''re only a Jr./Sr. if you have the same exact name.

Samanthared, it''s a big no no here to write the time out numerically.

Blushingbride, my mom has finally been convinced to leave the valet info off of the invite. Yay!

 

[cara]

heh heh... i''m a bit appalled that i know this.

two people are junior/senior if they have the exact same name AND are father/son. If you have skipped a generation or gone sideways somehow (uncle/nephew, etc.) then you are a I/II etc.

if you have any difference in name, like George W??? Bush and his father George Hubert Walker Bush then you don''t need Jr/Sr or numbers.

 

[Jas12]

Maybe i am just in ''one of those moods''

--but i am thinking why get too caught up with this stuff--write it how YOU want it and let it be. When FI and I were discussing wedding plans we would catch ourselves saying things like " but what if people____"? And then I would laugh and say who are "these people" like they were strangers or critics that would forever hold something against us if we didn''t use an inner envelop, write the time in numerals or something....IMO don''t sweat the small stuff and do what feels right.

 

[robbie3982]

Cara, thanks for the clarification!

Jas, that was our way of thinking too until a great aunt scolded my cousin on how she addressed her save the dates. They weren''t even formal wedding invites! So, now I''m all paranoid about things being proper.

 

[door knob solitaire]

I agree to the Jr. Sr. thing is supposed to be that way...know a few that aren''t using the entire name however, that still go with the addition (John Jr. for example). I even know a family that are exact name sharers...that use the I, II, III, and yes...now a IV. I think this option worked well as it was planned to continue. The option was to go II JR, IIIJr....or Jr. II, Jr. III, etc. What does George Foreman do? I, II, III, on to seven is it?

I always thought as individual announcement is was appropriate and used-because when you got the announcement for example for graduation it just may be confusing as to WHICH man it was. After all the Sr. could also be graduating from a later in life education.

But in this case, where both are represented on the same paper/announcement...there is no doubt WHICH man is marrying. As the father (aka Sr) is part of the married couple parents...and the younger is now announcing his marriage along with his parents. Now, when the baby announcement is prepared...it may be wise to add the Jr., it could be shocking to be confused on that one!!!

That was the reason I wanted to clarify the exact name sharing. It seems redundant to my inexperienced befuddled mind to have to include it. Is there any reason to my thought?

DKS

 

[Pandora II]

Date: 6/4/2007 5:32:50 AM
Author: Samantha Red
Just my two pennies from across the Atlantic. I would personally represent the time numerically- they always are here in the UK and I think it makes it more straightforward and not so wordy. I know this a cultural thing, but half after five would just confuse me (not diffcult I know LOL). I would be wondering half what? I am going to for 2.00pm on invitations.

With regard to info like valet parking, I would put a mini info pack in with the invitation explaining things like that, you could even put the full address, including zip code in there, if you feel happier furnishing people with that information

Ultimately, as is said so frequently on these forums, it is your wedding, you should do what makes you and your bloke happy.

I''ve noticed that US invitations are much more wordy in the numbers/times/dates thing.

I agree that here in the UK 3.30pm is perfectly acceptable. Half after Three is very uneuropean. I quite like the o''clock for very formal events and try to fix times so that I can use the full hour rather than the half.

I am one of these super-pedants who like things done by the book. I am ashamed to admit that I even ring Debretts for advice on occasion.

I had a wonderfully bizarre conversation with them last week when I was trying to work out how an envelope should be written for a Peer who was also a Knight (but knight bachelor - the lowest order, rather than one of the extra special ones that get letters after the name) and a Privy Councillor. The man in question was using "The Right Honourable the Lord Sir XXX of XXXX PC and I wasn''t sure that was correct.

Man at Debretts (In cut-glass accent): No, no, no, no, no - one does not say that. It is most definitely The Right Honourable the Lord XXX of XXX PC. He is merely a knight bachelor I''m afraid and so shouldn''t use it.

Me: But he is signing himself that way.

Man at Debretts (affronted): Then the Lord XXX needs to go back to school!

I could barely keep a straight face!

(My main boss is a Peer so I have a lot of formal invitations and letters to send)

 

[Samantha Red]

Date: 6/4/2007 4:07:25 PM
Author: Pandora II

Date: 6/4/2007 5:32:50 AM
Author: Samantha Red
Just my two pennies from across the Atlantic. I would personally represent the time numerically- they always are here in the UK and I think it makes it more straightforward and not so wordy. I know this a cultural thing, but half after five would just confuse me (not diffcult I know LOL). I would be wondering half what? I am going to for 2.00pm on invitations.

With regard to info like valet parking, I would put a mini info pack in with the invitation explaining things like that, you could even put the full address, including zip code in there, if you feel happier furnishing people with that information

Ultimately, as is said so frequently on these forums, it is your wedding, you should do what makes you and your bloke happy.

I''ve noticed that US invitations are much more wordy in the numbers/times/dates thing.

I agree that here in the UK 3.30pm is perfectly acceptable. Half after Three is very uneuropean. I quite like the o''clock for very formal events and try to fix times so that I can use the full hour rather than the half.

I am one of these super-pedants who like things done by the book. I am ashamed to admit that I even ring Debretts for advice on occasion.

I had a wonderfully bizarre conversation with them last week when I was trying to work out how an envelope should be written for a Peer who was also a Knight (but knight bachelor - the lowest order, rather than one of the extra special ones that get letters after the name) and a Privy Councillor. The man in question was using ''The Right Honourable the Lord Sir XXX of XXXX PC and I wasn''t sure that was correct.

Man at Debretts (In cut-glass accent): No, no, no, no, no - one does not say that. It is most definitely The Right Honourable the Lord XXX of XXX PC. He is merely a knight bachelor I''m afraid and so shouldn''t use it.

Me: But he is signing himself that way.

Man at Debretts (affronted): Then the Lord XXX needs to go back to school!

I could barely keep a straight face!

(My main boss is a Peer so I have a lot of formal invitations and letters to send)

Pandora I absolutely love that story, and I love being British! I am unashamedly a Royalist, and would fight tooth and nail to keep stuff like this alive and kicking

 

[Pandora II]

Oh me too! I think I''m the only LD who is!

I have to pay FI 61p a year so that he can''t moan about the Royal Family. Can you imagine what we''d have instead? President Beckham anyone???

The House of Lords is a mad place - my boss likes to have meetings over tea in their Dining Room. It''s all very civilised with a choice of Indian or China tea, scones and cream, muffins, crumpets and really good cake and lots of men in tights running around!

If you ever get the chance to look round Parliament definitely go - there is nowhere in the world quite like it. The MP''s still have ribbons on their coathooks on which to hang their swords!

 

[jcrow]

crane''s website has lots of useful info. click on the links on the left for specifics.

http://www.crane.com/etiquette.aspx?C=WeddingEtiquette&S=WeddingInvitation