Just want to vent a little bit

[Daniela]

A few days ago (can't remember who it was), someone posted on here about how they think that their beautiful diamond might be jinxed because they have had so many problems with it. That sentiment really spoke to me, because that's exactly how I feel about my ring.

I have had so many problems with this ring in the past year and a few months! The first diamond I ordered came loose in its setting within a few days, so I had to have it tightened. Then I wasn't really crazy about the stone anyway, because it wasn't an eye-clean SI-1 like I was told, so I decided to upgrade it because I knew I would never be happy with it. Then it got lost in the mail for two weeks, during which time I panicked compeletely. Finally I got the new diamond, it was beautiful and just what I wanted, and of course it came loose once again shortly after I got it (it was never really properly set, one of the prongs wasn't completely tight from the beginning and I could see this with my naked eye).

Anyway, I had to leave it for another two weeks (!) with local jeweller to have it re-set.

Fast forward to a couple of weeks ago (four months later), when the ring comes loose yet again, and I bring it back to the local jeweller who had guaranteed the stone setting for up to a year. He said, no problem, it will be a week to ten days and then you'll have it back. That was last Monday.

So I called him this morning (day 11 or 12, depending on how you count) to ask him what was going on with the tightening of my stone, and he said, "Yes, we still have it, and it's not ready yet." To which I replied, "Well, you said a week to ten days, and I dropped it off last Monday, so I'm starting to go into separation anxiety." He said, "Well, you're going to have to get a hold of your separation anxiety because it won't be ready until the middle of next week."

What was I supposed to say to that? Umm, you promised that my ring would be ready by now, you're not honouring your promises, you're an #%$^@, and get on it? I can't do that because he has something that is very valuable to me.

So I just said, "Well, if you could just keep my separation anxiety in mind, I would really appreciate it."

He was like, "Yeah, we'll call you when it's ready."

I hate him soooo much! And there isn't a darn thing I can do about it.

 

[Daniela]

I hate living in a smallish city where I don''t really have a lot of choice of jewellers, and where all of the jewellers have a "holier than thou" attitude that makes me want to scream.

I also feel like I wish I had never chosen the ring that I have now. I hate my four-prong solstice setting and wish I had gotten a semi-bezel or something, because all of my stupid stone-tightening problems would have been eliminated that way. I have nightmares regularly about my stone falling out of its setting and losing it forever. I wish I had done everything about this diamond purchase differently, but now I''m stuck with what I''ve got and have to watch it so carefully...

Argh!

 

[zdrastvootya]

My sympathies. Hopefully, this last time will pin it down.

More choice here in T.O. We''ve been lucky so far - no loosening of the setting. Got a pretty "sturdy" 4 prong custom made. Not the most elegant setting but I knew my fiancee would be worried a lot about losing the stone.

Z.

 

[Gale]

Oh, Daniela! I so know what you mean about living in a small town, and am so glad that I no longer do. Have you considered taking your ring on a trip to TO and having a custom setting done, or even sending it to a jeweller in TO?

 

[Daniela]

Thanks to my fellow Canadians for their sympathies. Gale, I would really love to take my diamond to Linda Penwarden in Toronto and have her design a lovely semi-bezel with a surprise diamond on each side, but it would be a bit of a stretch financially at this time to have another platinum ring custom made. There is another--more important--issue as well: my husband really likes the mounting that I have now, and I think he wants me to hold onto it unless I absolutely have to change it for security reasons. I don''t feel good about forcing the change if he''s not on board, because after all it is my engagement ring and I can understand his sentimentality. I''ve already upgraded the original engagement stone because the inclusions were driving me batty, so there would be nothing left of the original ring.

But in an ideal world, if money weren''t an issue and my husband wasn''t attached to this mounting, a new custom mounting is what I would do. I feel like I spend way too much time with the ring off of my finger than on! In total, I''ve been without my engagement ring for two months out of the 16 months I''ve had it. I guess in the grand scheme of things that doesn''t seem like a lot, but it just feels like so much time to me...

 

[Buena Girl]

Oh, that's awful having to worry about your diamond all day long!! Is there any way your husband would be on board for taking your diamond out of the e-ring setting and putting a low expense gemstone in like a topaz or garnet or something? That way it would be cheap to replace it if it popped out and got lost. Then get a new setting for your diamond. Even though it would cost more $$, it might be worth it for your piece of mind.

You could alternate wearing the original e-ring setting with gemstone and the diamond e-ring. Or designate one as a right hand ring.

 

[FireGoddess]

I just want to chime in and say there is NO REASON your stone should be coming loose like that unless you're A. severely banging your ring (which I highly doubt) or B. they keep setting it wrong. And as for this jeweler's attitude...frankly, it's the pits and he doesn't deserve your business. I don't care how busy he is, it does NOT take two weeks to set a diamond in a freaking 4 prong setting. If push came to shove, it could be done in an hour. An HOUR. Now, most jewelers would rather be able to take their time, and not be rushed, and likely have several clients in line before you. But two freaking weeks to set a stone into a 4 prong ring? Give me a damn break! Some companies can make an entire custom SETTING from scratch and mount a stone in it in that time.

I don't live in Canada, but I'm betting by this time you could have SENT it somewhere else, had them set it, and STILL have gotten the ring back already.

I would never allow someone who I am paying to do a service to talk to me like that jeweler talked to you. I think you should tell him, upon getting your ring back, that he'll be receiving payment in 7-10 days. Let him have some separation anxiety.

ETA: Are you sure you even WANT these guys to set your stone? Clearly they've screwed it up twice already....just a thought.

 

[jenwill]

Is it possible to take a trip to TO (don't know what that is ? Toronto?, but sounds as if your Canadian compatriots do!) and just have the head of the ring changed? It will be much less expensive than remaking the entire ring, and perhaps it will satisfy your finace's wish to keep the setting you have. See if they can remove the cureent head, and swap it for another with better prongs, or a semi-bezel if that is what you would really like.

Perhaps you could start a thread asking on the difficulty of switching heads on an existing ring? Then the experts could chime in with their knowledge.