Keep in mind I read into everything

[jas]

Ok, being an English teacher I look for symbolism everywhere. *Sigh* I also admittedly am having a really bad day.

May I share a story? You don''t need to comment, I just need to say this and move on. (Did I mention I''m having a bad day?)

I was at BF''s this weekend. Packing up my stuff, I asked him if he''d seen the ring (it''s a trinket, probably worth $15, but so not the point here) I''d left the week before. I always take it off and put it on the nightstand, and it wasn''t there this weekend.

"Hmmm," he said. He walked directly into his office (which I stay out of...now) and there it was, next to his computer. Under a pile of papers.

Ok, weird, wonderful, and yes my mind went straight to "he''s using this as a sizer...or trying to determine my style...or he''s wearing my jewelry when making business calls."

So, instead of handing it to me, he grabs my left hand and playfully starts to put it on my ring finger. Then he stops suddenly and says, "This is a right hand ring" and puts in on my right hand ring finger.

Ok, not much of a story. Probably doesn''t mean anything. But if you saw this scene in a movie, what would you think? Or is this where you''d go get the large bucket of popcorn and the JuJuBees?

Thanks,
Jas

 

[ellewoods]

Jas:

My first impression is that 1) he definitely was looking at your ring intentionally, most likely to gauge your ring size. The fact that it was by his computer under some of his papers indicates to me that he was looking at rings, perhaps emailing jewelers, and needed your size info.

As far as him grabbing your left hand, then grabbing your right, 2) I think this means that he has been thinking about buying an engagement ring, or has bought an engagement ring, and he''s comfortable with the idea of an engagement ring and of proposing, and he''s thinking to himself "little does she know, I''ve already looked at/bought/chosen a ring!"

Just my impression!

 

[sumbride]

I agree with Elle, Jas... I think he''s using it as a sizer! He probably printed out a sizer and was comparing. WOO HOO!

and yeah, this is one of those little things that if you mentioned it to your friends they would think you were nuts, but the LIW understand!!!!

 

[jas]

THIS? Is why I love you guys. Thanks. Here I was reading the whole right hand-left hand thing as though he were looking at the ol'' engagement finger like it was crawling with red ants. "Run away, run away."

My brain hurts today. Oh, it''s Monday. Probably why.

 

[sunkist]

Date: 5/22/2006 7:27:58 PM
Author: ellewoods
Jas:


My first impression is that 1) he definitely was looking at your ring intentionally, most likely to gauge your ring size. The fact that it was by his computer under some of his papers indicates to me that he was looking at rings, perhaps emailing jewelers, and needed your size info.


As far as him grabbing your left hand, then grabbing your right, 2) I think this means that he has been thinking about buying an engagement ring, or has bought an engagement ring, and he''s comfortable with the idea of an engagement ring and of proposing, and he''s thinking to himself ''little does she know, I''ve already looked at/bought/chosen a ring!''


Just my impression!

Yep, I''d agree with Elle, that he was definitely looking at it and probably at least looking at rings online. Staying on the cautious side, I still think it''s safe to say that he''s thinking about e-rings and proposing.

I don''t think you read too far into it, but then I''m a girl too and constantly read way too much into my BF!

haha. But this is a good sign!

 

[Kaleigh]

I think it''s a very good sign. Not time for pop corn, more like time to get those manicures!!!

 

[ilovesparkles]

I agree with all of the above. And the LH thing. Maybe he was making sure it fit that finger since its a RHR. Not everyone is the smae size on both hands. Now that is fun news!

 

[monarch64]

Hee hee, jas, the week before I got engaged, my now DH and I were in the grocery store and I was wearing a sterling silver ring on my left ring finger. While we were wandering down one aisle, he glanced over at my hand and said "why are you wearing a ring on that finger?" I said "I don''t know...I always do!" He promptly replied, "so what size is that?" and gave the whole thing away, lol! Just kidding, I was still completely surprised that weekend when he proposed, but it was a good teaser hint! I am gazing into my crystal ball right now, and I see...jas getting engaged very soon!

 

[firebirdgold]

He''s teasing you! And I bet he was using the ring for the size too. This is very good news!

 

[galeteia]

Hmmm...

He is defintely sizing it, otherwise, why be so close to his computer, hidden under some papers? (Ooo, do I wonder what those papers might have scribbled on them? Research, maybe?

)

However, on a purely practical note, do you have a birthday or special occasion coming up? He could be potentially getting your a RHR as a gift.

I hope it''s an e-ring, though!

 

[Blenheim]

I second the manicure!

 

[diamondfan]

sounds suspiciously like a guy attempt at being subtle...and maybe he meant to put it back where you leave it normally so you would not notice? I too read too much into things, I think it is a type of girl personality trait...we just do it!!! I am crossing my fingers for you! Have you discussed rings or styles/shapes/settings at all?

 

[jas]

Thank you, all. You ease my ever-spinning mind.

No special occasions coming up except that he has a lot of family coming in for Memorial Day. I''d be more hopeful except he''s on a business trip in Central America until Thursday and I don''t think he has time for shopping.

But I''ve been wrong before.

 

[bee*]

That definitely sounds like he is using it as a sizer-I can see a proposal soon....

 

[Lorelei]

crafty thing, I have had this happen to me in the past - get a manicure!!!

 

[jas]

Lorelei -- details (or a link to details) would be so very much appreciated.

You know what''s great, I feel like I''m sitting around with a bunch of girlfriends having a good giggle over this. Of course, in real life, my galpals just look at me like I drank the vanilla extract when I tell them things like this.

 

[Lorelei]

What happened was with an ex boyfriend years ago, he took my ring on the sly and I had a feeling he was up to something and didn't say anything! So I left it and then a couple of weeks later was presented with a ring! He had taken the other one to use as a sizer!!! I didn't marry this guy though! So in my experience I would think your BF is being a little rascal and doing something similar! Heck I would be reading EVERYTHING into this, so I hope to hear a happy announcement from you soon!!!!!!

I think he was checking how it fitted on your left hand, the crafty devil!!!!

 

[caligal]

OMG- your mind is going EXACTLY where mind would too! And I think he is looking online and grabbed the ring for sizing!

 

[sk8rjen]

Yep, definitely sounds positive

Gotta love a guy who tries to be subtle...hehe

So not too long ago my BF asked me why I was still wearing the ring he got me (us) in Mexico last summer (we have matching silver bands with a sun on them)-- I told him b/c it didn''t fit my middle finger anymore (neither did his after we got back)and I wear the tanzanite one he got me on my RH. He was pretty straightforward about me needing to free that finger up but I ran his comments through my head all day Sounds like yours is having a bit of fun being caught with a sizer ring.

jen

 

[jas]

Boy, I think you ladies are better at sniffing this stuff out than I am.

It has been the weekend of me sitting there saying, "ah, just come out and say it, boy..."

As I''ve mentioned, I have to move this summer, and BF has asked repeatedly for me to move in and I have repeatedly said, essentially, "No ring, no rent"

This weekend, we were helping some friends get their place ready to put on the market. BF is storing a lot of their stuff in the extra bedroom (my "future office") So, out of nowhere, he says , "I don''t want you to worry about moving. You have a home here."

I said, "We''ve talked about this..."

He said, "I know. And I don''t want you to worry..."

All weekend long he was saying how much he loves coming home and having me there, that it''s my home, that he''s redoing the kitchen for me.

Then today he kept telling me how much his friends are telling him to marry me. (I knew they were, I''m just surprised he mentioned it to me)

And he kept going...

He was talking about how his sibs got lovely wedding presents from his folks. He was joking around that he and one of his unmarried sibs always got in a huff about that. Then he said, "Well, I''m going to rectify that situation for me."

THEN we spent the day shopping around for furniture for his house (fairly recent move and very unfurnished). He went on a veritable spree for things for me in the house. Nightstand, dresser, etc. At one store which we both love he turned to the saleslady and said, "Do you have a registry here?" And as we checked out, they had these goofy large "jewels" that I believe are used as paperweights. Really hideous. But he grabbed one, put it on my finger and said, "Is this the right size?"

The saleslady, bless her heart, said, "Umm, I don''t think that''s big enough." Which was funny because the thing has to be 6 inches across.

So he said, "Well, honey, I think we''re going to have to get married just so you can buy all this stuff. And you get me in the process."

As if my head wasn''t spinning enough (and trust me, it was. I try to play all that pretty cool and just smile at him and give him the "we''ll see" look) we had dinner with his folks, who asked about my move. They asked him if he knew of any places I could move (he''s in real estate) and he said, "I have one in mind that''s perfect" and then he grinned at me. Then he told his parents (who, like me, read into everything, so he''s very careful not to reveal anything as he''s been terribly burned in the past with one failed engagement) that he and I have similar tastes in furnishings and "we" found items for "our" bedroom (ok, I could have done without him saying that in front of his parents) and for "our" kitchen.

His mom, as we were clearing the table, asked what I was doing this summer. I said, "I have a lot of planning to do..."

"For a wedding?" she asked, under her breath.

So it''s all silly girly stuff right now, and I know he''s Mr. I-Want-to-Surprise-Her-With-A-Ring-and-Proposal-So-She-Won''t-Be-Involved-in-the-Process, but I think he''s pretty darned close and lord knows he can''t keep secrets from me. Much.

I just am feeling so up and happy and CALM knowing it''s pretty soon (I do have to move by August, so the boy better get on this soon).

Just wanted to share because I have to wipe this silly grin off my face.

Thanks for listening!

Jas

 

[fisherofmengirly]

Yay! Things are moving right along. Cute post, by the way.

 

[ilovesparkles]

Ok I am practically swooning after that post sheeshta! That is so fabulous and sounds like he can barely keep it all to himself that he is planning his proposal! OK yeah we are all reading in to this, very deeply! Hehehe I am just giddy. I have to calm down before K calls. It is never good for me to be on PS right before that!

 

[jas]

Thanks fisher and ilovesparkles. Yeah, it''s fun. Right now I feel like I''m one of the leads in a love story.

It''s been a long road...this has not been an easy point to get to...BF and I have had our share of trauma and drama and comedy (traumady?)

We''re both in our 30s (his much later than mine, *snerk*) -- he was commitmentphobic for years, tried to get over that w/ previous engagement about 5 years ago and she broke it off (and broke his heart). He''s spent the last years since then in short, non-threatening relationship and running scared whenever someone got too close.

For himself, and to a lesser extent for "us" and to a much lesser extent for "me" he went to see a therapist for a few months who got him in touch with his "creamy center" (as he calls it). So I take every loving moment, big and small like this weekend, and cherish it. I feel like we''ve walked through hell together, getting to the root of a lot of pain and coming out on the other side holding hands because we knew, from the start, that this was "meant to be."

I''d always wondered about that with other happy couples I saw...I would get infuriated when they''d say to me that I''d "just know." But now I get it. I "know" he and I are supposed to happen -- and not in a fairy-tale "ooh, I can''t wait to be his little princess in Happily Ever After Land" way. But in a real, "Am I willing to pick his dirty underpants off the floor for the rest of my life" kinda way.

And yeah, I am. Because he picks mine up, too. And because not only are we worth fighting for, but we''re worth laughing for. And laughing at. And we do.

I had read the book "Many Lives, Many Masters" right before meeting him. It''s got a lot of controversial ideas in there about reincarnation and all that, but the overall message was that certain people are in our lives, especially our close relationships, to teach us things about life and about ourselves. Our loving relationships, our SOs have the most to teach us, if we are ready and willing to learn.

I am so ready and willing to learn with this wonderful man for the rest of my life; and joyously, my teacher is also my student, willing to both learn from me and teach me. It''s kinda beautiful.

Sorry, slipped into my PBS Pledge Drive "Make Your Life Matter" moment there.