marriage pt2.. beep!

[strmrdr]

A YOUNG MAN’S DILEMMA
A young man was seeing two women. He couldn’t decide which to marry. So he visited a therapist. The therapist asked him to describe the women. The man said one was a great writer. The other made extraordinary baked goods. The therapist thought for a moment, and then said, “Ah-ha! You can’t decide if you want to marry for batter or for verse.”

 

[Diamond*Dana]

Lol, cute.

 

[bee*]

Oh no

Have to run off and tell my mother that one!

 

[Kaleigh]

Hehe, that was cute.

 

[Sparkalicious]

 

[Skippy123]

A sign was hung in an office window. It read:

Help wanted.
Must type 70 words a minute.
Must be computer literate.
Must be bilingual.
An equal opportunity employer.

A dog was ambling down the street and saw the sign. He looked at it for a moment, pulled it down with his mouth, and walked into the manager's office, making it clear he wished to apply for the job.

The office manager laughed and said, "I can't hire a dog for this job."

The dog pointed to the line: "An equal opportunity employer."

So the manager said, "OK, take this letter and type it." The dog went off to the word processor and returned a minute later with the finished letter, perfectly formatted.

The manager said, "Alright, here's a problem. Write a computer program for it and run it."

Fifteen minutes later, the dog came back with the correct answer.

The manager still wasn't convinced. "I still can't hire you for this position. You've got to be bilingual."

The dog looked up at the manager and said, "Meow."

 

[Kaleigh]

Date: 2/9/2008 5:18:19 PM
Author: Skippy123

A sign was hung in an office window. It read:

Help wanted.
Must type 70 words a minute.
Must be computer literate.
Must be bilingual.
An equal opportunity employer.

A dog was ambling down the street and saw the sign. He looked at it for a moment, pulled it down with his mouth, and walked into the manager''s office, making it clear he wished to apply for the job.

The office manager laughed and said, ''I can''t hire a dog for this job.''

The dog pointed to the line: ''An equal opportunity employer.''

So the manager said, ''OK, take this letter and type it.'' The dog went off to the word processor and returned a minute later with the finished letter, perfectly formatted.

The manager said, ''Alright, here''s a problem. Write a computer program for it and run it.''

Fifteen minutes later, the dog came back with the correct answer.

The manager still wasn''t convinced. ''I still can''t hire you for this position. You''ve got to be bilingual.''

The dog looked up at the manager and said, ''Meow.''

Good one Miss Skippy!!

 

[Skippy123]

Date: 2/9/2008 5:47:01 PM
Author: Kaleigh
Good one Miss Skippy!!

thanks, my dear sweet mom told me that one. hehee

 

[strmrdr]

Date: 2/9/2008 5:48:31 PM
Author: Skippy123

Date: 2/9/2008 5:47:01 PM
Author: Kaleigh
Good one Miss Skippy!!

thanks, my dear sweet mom told me that one. hehee

Your Mom rocks that cracked me up :}

 

[Sparkalicious]

Too cute ... I love that one Skippy!

 

[wifey2b]

Date: 2/9/2008 5:18:19 PM
Author: Skippy123

A sign was hung in an office window. It read:

Help wanted.
Must type 70 words a minute.
Must be computer literate.
Must be bilingual.
An equal opportunity employer.

A dog was ambling down the street and saw the sign. He looked at it for a moment, pulled it down with his mouth, and walked into the manager''s office, making it clear he wished to apply for the job.

The office manager laughed and said, ''I can''t hire a dog for this job.''

The dog pointed to the line: ''An equal opportunity employer.''

So the manager said, ''OK, take this letter and type it.'' The dog went off to the word processor and returned a minute later with the finished letter, perfectly formatted.

The manager said, ''Alright, here''s a problem. Write a computer program for it and run it.''

Fifteen minutes later, the dog came back with the correct answer.

The manager still wasn''t convinced. ''I still can''t hire you for this position. You''ve got to be bilingual.''

The dog looked up at the manager and said, ''Meow.''

rofl....when I speak French, Strmy always says, "If you do you have to eat it" giggle....so I say he is bilingual when he says, "Yes,Dear!" giggle :}

 

[Skippy123]

Hey Wifey! Good to see you! Thanks Wifey, Storm and Sparks, you guys are cuties!

 

[Rhea]

I love silly jokes. Absolutely love them. I''m horrible at remembering the two I make DH tell me weekly or I''d type them out for you.

Anyone else have any more? Please?!

 

[LegacyGirl]

Oh haha those are great!!

The bride said she wanted three children, while the young husband said two would be enough for him.

They discussed this discrepancy for a few minutes until the husband thought he''d put an end to things by saying boldly, "After our second child, I''ll just have a vasectomy."

Without a moments hesitation, the bride retorted, "Well, I hope you''ll love the third one just as if it''s your own."

 

[LegacyGirl]

As a new bride, Aunt Edna moved into the small home on her husband''s ranch. She put a shoe box on a shelf in her closet and asked her husband NEVER to touch it.

For fifty years Uncle Jack left the box alone until Aunt Edna was old and dying. One day when he was putting their affairs in order, he found the box again and thought it might hold something important. Opening it, he found two doilies and $82,500 in cash.

He took the box to her and asked about the contents.

"My mother gave me that box the day we married," she explained. "She told me to make a doily to help ease my frustrations every time I got mad at you."

Uncle Jack was very touched that in 50 years she''d only been mad at him twice.

"What''s the $82,500 for?" he asked.

"Oh, that''s the money I made selling the rest of the doilies."

 

[LegacyGirl]

Oh goodness this one is good too!!




A businessman boarded a plane to find, sitting next to him, an elegant woman wearing the largest, most stunning diamond
ring he had ever seen. He asked her about it.

"This is the Klopman diamond," she said. "It is beautiful, but there is a terrible curse that goes with it."

"What''s the curse?" the man asked.

"Mr. Klopman."