musician question

[Cady]

Hi all! I''m getting married this Saturday and would love some advice on how to word a question I need to ask my musicians, who are close friends. I have a feeling that they will be offering their services as a wedding gift (I am a musician as well, and that is what I''ve always done for friends and relatives), but I certainly don''t want to assume anything, and would happily pay them - I''m just not sure how to ask! I have been throwing around a thousand different ways of asking "how much do you plan to charge?" but nothing sounds right. Any ideas? Am I overthinking this?

 

[ficklefaye]

hi cady, since they are close friends, i don''t see anything wrong with you being upfront about it and asking them how much they will charge, i think it''s better than assuming that it is a gift, unless you feel they will be offended?

 

[Cady]

Hi FickleFaye! Thank you for your response! I think you are right about being upfront. I feel fine with directly asking two of them, but the third was one of my college professors and I feel a little unsure of the right wording!

 

[ficklefaye]

oh that is a toughie, can you start out by letting them know how much you appreciate having them play at your wedding? then politely follow up with, by the way, you never told me how much i owe you guys for doing this

just my thoughts, sorry i''m not much help

 

[ficklefaye]

btw, i''m still jealous of your inherited & restored eternity band, i''m tempted to buy something similar from SS, hehe

 

[Cady]

Thanks again, FickleFaye! You were a big help - I just needed to grow a pair and ask directly (which I did, though I took the cowardly route and emailed them). Thank you also for the compliment about my band! My fiance hid it because I kept trying it on, so I can''t wait to finally be able to wear it (and stare at it) on Saturday. Hope you''re having a good evening!

 

[OUpearlgirl]

I sing at weddings somewhat often, and I''d never accept money from a friend. I doubt they were expecting you to pay.

I do think you should give them a handwritten note after the wedding thanking them.

 

[honey22]

I am sure they will do it for free, but just drop them a line and say you have neglected to find out how they preferred to be paid, cheque, cash etc? If they are doing a freebie, they will certainly be letting you know then!

 

[vintagecushion]

The next time you meet to discuss plans, how about saying something like "I''m SO grateful that you are playing at my wedding. What do I owe you guys?" You should at least get an answer, whether it''s money, homemade cookies, drinks, or just appreciation.