Need Help: DJ vs Band

[Mannequin]

Only engaged two weeks and here comes trouble, sheesh.

I want a DJ, more variety, fewer breaks, and you can get a good emcee for the crowd with the right guy. FMIL is insisting that people her age (40s) will NOT want to dance at my wedding next year if there is not a band playing, and is now offering to pay additional money to hire a DJ to play in between sets that the band plays. I think it is an unnecessary waste of money, even if she is offering to pay for it, and FI is wavering between being a momma''s boy and teaming with me. He''s no help, and I don''t want to play bridezilla this early into planning!

I need more opinions on this. BIWS:

1) Your preference/what you used: band or DJ? Why?
2) Approximate pricing of your music at your reception?
3) If you had your wedding already, how was the music? Comments from guests?

Thanks for your help!

 

[dani13]

Well, I am sure everyone will have their different opinions, but here is mine. Music, to us, is really important, we love going to see live music/ shows, so my FI and I prefer a band, and that is most likely what we will seek out when we finally plan everything. Most of the functions I have been to have had bands, and with the right one they do a great job, they are great entertainers, etc. However, a band is usually a lot more money than a DJ. I guess it just depends what is important to you and your FI. I am not sure where you live, but I know around here where I am (in NJ, close to NYC) a good band with 8-10 musicians is going to cost you $6-10K to play for the night...whereas I believe you can get a DJ for 2-3K. So that is a BIG price difference, but you a gettting 2 totally different feels, you know what I mean? Good luck, I know it is stressful to make decisions on all of these things!

 

[Jelly]

1. With my fiance and I being musicians, we really wanted live music for the reception and ceremony. I agree that having both a dj and band is a little overboard. Is there a family member that you can get to act as an emcee who will also turn on some of your favorite tunes during the breaks? Perhaps the facility has a sound system you can rent.

2. 4K but we live in a large-ish city. I''m sure it would be more in NYC or LA area.

3. Wedding isn''t until July, but I''ve never been to a wedding with a live band. Everyone has DJ''s.

 

[jcrow]

price really depends where you are. for us $1,800.00 for a maximum of 4 hrs. for the band. we are not doing a dj between breaks. we are making a cd of favorite songs including first dance songs from my friends'' own weddings to be played in between breaks. the band we have play a variety and that''s what we were happy about, besides that they are good

 

[selflove]

We had a small wedding with 65 guests so a band seemed over-powering. We got a DJ who was a great MC, for $950 (which is a very good deal here in LA). He was great--played all the music I put on my request list. Really got everyone up and dancing, even the way over 40 crowd. Haven''t gotten a ton of comments but the few I got were all positive and as one friend put it "It just went OFF after dinner!" Everyone was dancing all night, and isnt'' that what we all want?!

Where do you live?

If FMIL is offering to pay the extra, why not just let her? I''m not sure why she thinks middle aged people wouldn''t dance to a DJ...but it sounds like you''ll have the best of both worlds.

 

[heart prongs]

There are cheesy bands out there and obnoxious DJ''s!
There are fabulous bands and excellent DJs!
Nobody can really say that one is always going to be better than the other.

My suggestion is to do some research as the music really sets the tone for the wedding. We ended up with a fabulous DJ who came highly recommended to us by many couples and a prominent area photographer. You may want to consider your venue as well. We got married in an old Tudor mansion, and the room worked better with a DJ. What impressed me most about our DJ was that we had a Sunday afternoon wedding and the dance floor was packed from start to finish. I think you have to think of your audience as well...some people really like interactive stuff (we don''t) but a good DJ or band should be able to accommodate your needs -- no matter what they may be!

klr

prongs

 

[Mannequin]

Thank you for your responses so far, everyone.

I live in the metro Detroit area, and have not looked into pricing here yet but it seems like I am going to find the same approximate costs as you have suggested for DJs and bands. We seem to be looking at about 270-280 people on the preliminary guest lists, and I am looking for ways to make this happen without blowing an inordinate amount of money on needless items. Hence the reason I don''t want FMIL trying to double book entertainment for the evening - why not put up that extra money as a way to cover more food for the guests? Extra flowers? Limo? And so on...

The place we are likely to book as our reception site is a cultural center with one long hall that is three rooms connected together. I think that if I have a DJ set up on the end with the dance floor, I will still be able to musically entertain the entire long hall at the same time. This room gives us the greatest flexibility in seating layouts of the places we have seen so far, and that would be a plus since we have so many people coming.

Any other responses to the DJ/band questions would still be helpful.

 

[Blue824]

Sometimes bands offer a dj service, I"m sure its just like preset cds or whatever not the whole emceeing stuff, but they offer it for when they take breaks and it is included in their packaging... then there is never silence and you''re not hiring two separate groups of people. May be something to look into when you''re interviewing people.

Personally I prefer a band, as long as they''re good

 

[San Diego Bride]

i''m not much help in the music forum. we''re having a small, daytime wedding. music is important to us, but in a different way. we''ve hired a string quartet for the ceremony and then a solo harpist for the cocktail hour. during lunch we''ll play music on an ipod. we want our guests to feel like this is a nice lunch with friends rather than necessarily having that "big party" feel so we''re going to play the same music we would play at our house. i know everyone is different, but we''re more comfortable with this approach. in the end, i don''t think our guests will mind. most are not big dancers anyway. and all will be enjoying fine food and drinks for the afternoon at a beautiful venue overlooking the pacific ocean.

what worries me a little is just how involved your FMIL is in the wedding plans. don''t get me wrong, being helpful is good. but i think there is such a thing as being TOO helpful/bordering on selfish. this day is about you and your future husband and your desires should be most important. are you all in the same area? can you all have a nice sit-down before you get too far into this and talk about what''s important to each of you? i''m sure you''ll find a compromise somewhere. music might be more important to you, but maybe you can incorporate her favorite soup or dessert or something into the menu (just a random example). back to the dj... i''m sure they''ll provide you with a sample of their work. maybe you could share that with your FMIL so that she can see that the dj is able to get people of all ages on the dancefloor. maybe you should point out to her that a LOT of brides are in their 30''s (like me) and 40''s, so these dj''s most likely do not make their living catering to people in their early 20''s.

good luck either way.

 

[flopkins]

1)DJ.
2)Around $900 (cheap for our area)
3)Guests liked it...

We wouldn''t have minded a live band, but it''s just TOO expensive where we are (around $1k per person, so a 5 person band would run ~$5k) and we just couldn''t justify the expense.

However, I recently went to two weddings w/live bands, and both were great! I think if you find a good one, they can do a large variety of music, and will be entertaining for all. If your ILs are insisting on it, and there''s not much else they are so adamant about, I don''t see a problem with looking into it and seeing whats out there, you might be surprised. (The reason I say this is bc one couple who had the live band, the FMIL had insisted on it, and paid extra for it, and I thought it turned out very well!)

You could always play some hip hop or more modern stuff during their breaks too, ipod style or something.

 

[tanyak]

1. DJ
2. Will be about $575 (includes recorded music during ceremony)
3. My fiance and I love hip-hop, R&B, old-school soul and some rock and alternative. For our ceremony, live musicians weren''t a priority, and saving that $500 allowed us to get stuff we really cared about. I''ve never been to a wedding with a reception band, but I''m sure it could be good. I guess it really depends on the type of music you want to hear the most.

 

[peonygirl]

We''re actually having a band and a DJ--the best of both worlds. Having a band for the first half and a DJ for the second half was $1,000 less than having a band the whole time, which was another perk.