reception kisses...

[partyjewels]

Well I had a much longer post and decided I ramble too much on here all the time so I''d just stick to the main question.

I''ve always been annoyed at weddings where people don''t know when to stop clinking their glasses to get the bride and groom to kiss! For me, it''s only cute the first couple of times, then it''s not annoying and I feel bad for the poor couple who''s trying to eat. So I''ve been trying to think of other ways for people to get us to kiss if they are so inclined (which I know they are a little TOO inclined, from other family weddings

).

So I was thinking, what if I got a couple of magnetic love poetry sets and some magnetic boards (really anything that the pieces will stick too and I can make pretty). If people want us to kiss they must present us with a poem, lyrics, etc... and possibly read it out loud into the mic.

So if anyone got through that...what would you think if this was done at a wedding you went to? Do you have any suggestions on how to pull it off? Do I put up one big board, or little ones on each table? Is this too nuts to even try?

I thought it would be a wonderful alternative, but I always second guess myself. If I''m going to do this I want to start looking soon so I can buy the supplies I''ll need on sale.

 

[sumbride]

I never really understood this concept... I guess it''s not common in my neck of the woods.

and believe me, hubby and I smooched throughout the reception because we were SO HAPPY the wedding was over and we were having fun! Nobody had to clink a glass to make it happen. We had lots of kisses while dancing too... there''s a whole bunch of pics of it, so many I''m kind of embarrassed!

 

[partyjewels]

I really don''t understand it either. At any other event if you clink a glass you''re going to toast I thought... So why is it any different at a wedding? I don''t know, maybe it''s just something common around here, but I know if we don''t have something else they have to do, I''ll have to listen to those clinking glasses all throughout dinner!

 

[sap483]

Ugghhh I really get annoyed at the glass clinking. At FI''s cousin''s wedding this summer, my FMIL had a bit too much to drink and was banging on every object she could find. His dad was mortified. Let''s just say that she''s been warned not to pull that at our wedding (and not by FI and I).

Anyway, to your question, I think the idea is cute. I''m not sure how it would work out in practice. I think may still get the clinking, especially as the night goes on.

 

[mjso]

I think your idea is really cute! I always like touches like that at weddings where the guests share thoughts about the couple or other personal ways to get the guests involved. It might be a good alternative, but is it really going to stop people from clinking on glasses anyway?

I''m just thinking that you might still get people clinking glasses and then what are you going to do?

In my experience, it usually starts at one table and then the whole reception is clinking, who are you going to single out to read a poem? Are you going to "disappoint" the reception by not kissing?

 

[goldenstar]

I think its a really cool idea but it might be a little too involved, thus deterring guests from asking for a kiss. The glass clinking thing CAN get annoying though. Maybe you can have them use bells to get you to kiss. Its less grating on the ears at least. I went to one weddding where they used bicycle bells because the groom was an avid cycler. It was cute.

 

[laine]

Nobody has done the clinking thing at the last several weddings i went to, so that was kinda nice. I think if people wanna clink, they''re gonna clink, regardless of what alternatives you set up, so I don''t think your idea will avoid it.

The poetry thing sounds cute, but I think it would wind up being a weird interruption, especially to have people read them into the mic (which may invite all sorts of other things being said into the mic). You could still have the poetry thing just as a way for guests to amuse themselves at the tables. Maybe work it into table numbers or placecards.

 

[ang3199]

I hate glass klinking. FI and I always say "we are not doing that at our wedding." I love him to death, but I don''t want to kiss him when he has a mouth full of chicken.

Unfortunately, where I''m from it happens every 5 minutes during the reception. So we have brainstormed the idea that every time glass klinking happens the dj is going to pull guests names out of a hat to kiss (couples of course). See how they like kissing with a mouth full of chicken. HA.

 

[LauraLoo]

Are you just looking for alternative ways for guests to get you to kiss or ways to avoid it all together?

I personally find this tradition extremely annoying. On one of my local wedding boards, someone had a good idea on how to prevent this.
They had their DJ make an announcement to the guests that if they would like a glass of the special house wine, just clink their glass and a server would promptly come and fill it. The house wine - Manischewitz

 

[sap483]

Laine brings up a really good point. Giving guests the opportunity to use the mic is a recipe for disaster IMO. I went to a wedding this summer where this happened and let''s just say there were more than a few awkward moments.

 

[Neveah]

Can I be honest without hurting feelings? It''s pretty cheesy..... I don''t think many people would be into it.... but if you''re trying to get them to not "clink" glasses your idea might work.

 

[Neveah]

Date: 1/8/2008 5:47:21 PM
Author: Neveah
Can I be honest without hurting feelings? It''s pretty cheesy..... I don''t think many people would be into it.... but if you''re trying to get them to not ''clink'' glasses your idea might work.

Okay, just read my response and it sounded...... harsh. Did NOT mean for it to come out like that. I guess I was just thinking as a *guest* it would make me feel a bit uncomfortable to talk on a mic, or get up in front of everybody. And then if it got awkward....

Anyway, I totally agree with the clinking being annoying. Maybe ask your DJ to turn the music up louder when the "clink" one too many times to drown it out.... and then maybe they''ll get the hint!!!

 

[partyjewels]

First off, thank you for all your responses. I''m still not sure if I want to do it or not, but you''ve all given me lots of good points to think about in the meantime, and perhaps I will just get them anyways for people to play with regardless. Thanks!!


sap483 - I think you are right that people will still clink, but we will be ignoring it!

mjso - I''m not sure you understood how I meant it, the whole point is to avoid the clinking. We wouldn''t be calling on anyone, they''d actually have to come up to the table we are sitting at and present us with a poem they put together from the magnetic poetry. As far as the people who will still clink, yes, I will definitely disappoint those people by not kissing.

goldenstar - The whole point is to deter them from asking for a kiss

laine - I wasn''t sure about the mic thing, just threw it out there as an idea, but I think you''re right, it might cause problems with people who have had too much to drink!

ang3199 - Exactly! Although I have to say, no offense to you, but to me it''s not a fair way to deter it... we were at a wedding where they tried to do what you did, except they had it so however the couple kissed, they would copy it. The problem was that the single people at the reception had nothing to loose and clinked away all night, leaving me (a very private person who hates to have all eyes on her) worrying about eating the food in front of me for fear my name was going to be called at any moment while I had a mouth full of mashed potatoes. It made for a very unpleasant meal as the clinking didn''t stop the entire time. Our name was picked and called into the mic, the spotlight put on us and I had to kiss my FI in front of the entire room with all eyes on us. But at the same time, I won''t be at your wedding, so I say go for it!! hehe.


LauraLoo - I figured I''d be nicer than simply ignoring their requests and give them a way to still ask for a kiss out of us, I just wanted something that would make them uncomfortable enough to deter most people.


Neveah - don''t worry about it, I don''t think you sounded harsh at all, because the whole thing is I really don''t want the whole kissing thing at all, but I know that alot of people who are invited won''t take the hint and bang on the glasses all night long regardless. It would make me incredibly uncomfortable as a guest to have to get up and talk in front of everyone, and thats the whole point. I was just thinking maybe if I give them a different way to ask, but a more involved one that they can''t just sit back and do it anonymously, people might get the hint? I don''t know.. I do realize no matter what I do people will be obnoxious. hmmm..

 

[Tacori E-ring]

People didn''t do this at our wedding either. I do think it is an odd tradition. I have heard of a couple who made people sing love songs. I think the poetry idea is cute and creative. How are you going to let people know what they are suppose to do though?

 

[VRBeauty]

At a wedding I went to recently, the DJ stepped in after a few rounds of "clinking" and joked that "the groom needed to save his strength for the honeymoon." Not the most tasteful way to handle it, I suppose, but it was done with humor and it did the trick.

 

[partyjewels]

Tacori - I''m not entirely sure how we''d go about letting people know, I''m thinking some kind of announcement once people start to do the clinking? That or if we go the route of having each table have the magnetic poetry and a board then we could write up a little note explaining.

Minims - thats one way to quell it! but I agree, probably not the most tactful or tasteful way to go about it

 

[LauraSLP07]

The "love song" idea was done at my cousin''s wedding. We come from a very musical family, so the DJ announced that the couple would only kiss if someone sang a song/verse with the word "love" in it.

It was actually cute and wasn''t a distraction. We just had to approach the DJ, so that he could prepare a break in the music. Throughout the night, I would say that about 20 songs/duets were performed. I don''t think that my cousin and his wife had any idea that so many people would be willing to sing!

 

[shimmer]

My cousin is a pro hockey player and at his wedding the guests would have to score a goal into a net that was set up off to the side for them to kiss. I think it was really cute, especially when the little kids were trying! He even got up to help one, it was adorable and such a great photo op.

(I should probably mention that we are from Canada, so hockey is very popular and a huge part of our culture here)

I like the idea of making the guests more involved in the reception!

 

[xapora]

They did the "love song" thing at a wedding I went to recently also, it was really cute and it got everybody at the table talking. They did it a little differently. The DJ said that if you wanted the bride and groom to kiss, the entire table had to choose a song with the word "love" in it, stand up once the song he was playing was winding down, and everybody at the table had to sing. He would then play it, the bride and groom would kiss, and it was sort of a song request from the entire table to the bride and groom. Everyone thought it was really cute, definitely a lot better than clinking glasses.

 

[partyjewels]

Laura and Xapora - I love that idea! The only thing is that my Dad loves to sing, don''t get me wrong he''s good at it, it can just get a little annoying For example - one of my sisters and I went with him to see the movie Rent. He was sitting there singing the entire time! We had to keep elbowing him to get him to stop. In any case though, perhaps I''ll suggest this to my FI too. Thanks!

Shimmer - thats very cute I think thats a great idea but neither of us are really into any specific sport so I don''t know what we''d do that would make sense.

 

[Pandora II]

I had no idea about this.

Can you just pretend you have no idea and ignore it - I''m sure they''d give up after a while?

 

[lucy.lucy.80]

although I agree not the most tactful method...I love MINIMS suggestion...when I read that I burst out laughing!!

 

[gtn]

PartyJewels, I went to a wedding once where the couple loved to play trivia pursuit. So they put a stack of trivia pursuit cards on the table and said that if you could stump the couple with a question, than they would kiss. If they got it right, they wouldn''t.

I also like the idea LauraLoo had of having the DJ make an announcement that clinking the glass meant that you wanted more wine. I would also add, make the special wine - Charles Shaw aka "two buck chuck".

 

[snlee]

This happened to us a couple of times during our reception. Thankfully not too many times. I love ang''s idea of having the DJ draw names of couples to kiss!

 

[partyjewels]

Pandora - you''re one of the lucky ones who never got to witness this lovely "tradition" eh? I envy you! Unfortunately ignoring it won''t stop it, they''ll just get more obnoxious. Plus as I''m sure I''ll be kissing my then husband all night long regardless, they''d probably think I did it from the clinking at least once or twice and it would start up again. It''s rather obnoxious and I really do wonder how these things get started!


gtn - that would be a great idea for my sister and her current boyfriend if decided to tie the knot! They''re both great with games like this so I''ll have to remember that if wedding bells ring for them For us though it wouldn''t work so well as neither of us are really that great with those types of games!

 

[FireGoddess]

Date: 1/8/2008 9:58:07 PM
Author: MINIMS
At a wedding I went to recently, the DJ stepped in after a few rounds of ''clinking'' and joked that ''the groom needed to save his strength for the honeymoon.'' Not the most tasteful way to handle it, I suppose, but it was done with humor and it did the trick.

Honestly, I think that''s a great and funny solution!

I have found, not only at my own wedding but at those I''ve attended, that those pesky glass clinkers will stop at NOTHING. You can refuse to kiss all you like but they''re going to keep clinking till you do. So I found that I just humored them a few times, and after that, they end up stopping. If they don''t, the post above is a funny way to tell ''em to knock it off.