Ring-warming ritual

[karasue91]

Has anyone heard of this or been to a wedding that had this incorporated into their ceremony? For anyone who hasn''t heard of it (like me, until 10 minutes ago) this is how it goes:

Warming of the Rings
Around the world the wedding rings are the strongest and most visible sign of the bond these two people are about to make. A commitment to life, to each other and to the future.

With a ring warming in your ceremony the rings will not only be a gift from one to another but will be given with the love, support and wisdom of all present.

The rings are passed amongst all the guests and they hold the rings thus giving their personal blessing upon the rings before the bride & groom exchange the rings.

At the time the rings are exchanged it might be with words like:

"These rings, now warmed by those you love the most will forever show the world your are one and they will carry with them the eternal love and blessing of your families."

We are having about 150-175 people at our wedding, so I''m a little concerned that the rings wouldn''t make it around in time before the vows. But we are planning to have 2 songs sung during the ceremony, so maybe we could just make sure that the vows are at the very end to allow more time.

Any thoughts? I think it''s such a lovely idea...

 

[karasue91]

Example of what the JOP would say to let the guests know what''s going on:

The following words are read by the celebrant -- “ During this ceremony Jack and Jill will exchange rings. These rings are visible sign of their commitment to one another. As this ceremony proceeds, we invite family and friends to take part in the warming of the rings. We ask that you wish them health and happiness, and all that is noble in life. I ask that each guest hold them for a moment, warm them with your love and make a silent wish for this couple, and their future together. When these rings come back they will contain, in their precious metal, that which is more precious, that which is priceless – your love and hope and pledge of support for their union.”

 

[Haven]

I love this ritual. I''ve never heard of it before but it sounds like a very special way to involve your loved ones.

It reminds me of something we do in Judaism during our Havdalah service, which is every Saturday night when three stars come out in the sky. We pass one wine glass and a spice box around and everyone takes a sip of the wine and smells the spices. They are more or less symbols of joy and the redolence of the holiday. I love how similar the ring warming ceremony is to this ritual.

 

[Sabine]

I does sound like a nice idea, and I''ve never seen it before, so it seems somewhat original, but I would be WAY TOO PARANOID with my actual rings going from hand to hand. What if someone drops it and it rolls and can''t be found or at least causes a big commotion? What if a little kid gets ahold of it? And I would also worry that they wouldn''t make it to the front in time. I''m not looking for anything else to worry about on my wedding day, but if you think it would be more fun than worry, then you should do it!

 

[CrownJewel]

Karasue, that is such a nice idea! But do you give both rings to one guest to start, and everyone passes both at the same time? Or do you start one ring on one side and the other on the other side? I think it''s better to pass BOTH rings to each person, so the guests don''t get confused. And maybe start the rings at the back so that by the time everyone has warmed the rings, it will already be at the front. Perhaps it would be good to have a member of the wedding party watch over the rings as they get passed so that person can direct the rings to the next person if a guest gets confused. Just to move things along quickly!!

 

[karasue91]

Date: 12/17/2007 11:37:09 AM
Author: Sabine
I does sound like a nice idea, and I''ve never seen it before, so it seems somewhat original, but I would be WAY TOO PARANOID with my actual rings going from hand to hand. What if someone drops it and it rolls and can''t be found or at least causes a big commotion? What if a little kid gets ahold of it? And I would also worry that they wouldn''t make it to the front in time. I''m not looking for anything else to worry about on my wedding day, but if you think it would be more fun than worry, then you should do it!

hahaha Sabine, I think I would tie the rings together with some ribbon....or maybe even a little fabric from my dress when it gets hemmed! Also, we aren''t having any children at the wedding, so we don''t have to worry about that.

Haven, maybe this ceremony came from that Jewish ritual? I was perusing the indiebride.com message boards and came across this, so I looked into it...we haven''t booked our officiant yet, we are meeting with a couple in the next 2 weeks so hopefully we will have one booked before the new year! I''ll have to see what they say about timing...

We are also thinking about doing the hand ceremony:
Hand Ceremony

In the hand ceremony, the officiant invites the bride and groom to view the hands of the other as a gift.

As an expression that your hearts are joined together in love - will you please face each other and hold hands, so you may feel the
gift that you are to one another.
These are the hands of your best friend, young and strong and full of love for you, that are holding yours on your wedding day as you
promise to love each other today, tomorrow, and forever.
These are the hands that will work alongside yours as together you build your future.
These are the hands that will passionately love you and cherish you through the years, and with the slightest touch will comfort you
like no other.
These are the hands that will tenderly hold your children.
These are the hands that will help you to hold your family as one.
And lastly, these are the hands that even when wrinkled and aged will still be reaching for yours, still giving you the same unspoken
tenderness with just a touch.
Blessing after:
“Our prayer for you today is that both of you will use these hands to build a marriage where all your dreams come true.”

Since we aren''t having a religious ceremony, I wanted something to make the ceremony more than just "Do you take her? Do you take him? I now pronounce you husband and wife"

 

[karasue91]

Date: 12/17/2007 11:37:49 AM
Author: CrownJewel
Karasue, that is such a nice idea! But do you give both rings to one guest to start, and everyone passes both at the same time? Or do you start one ring on one side and the other on the other side? I think it''s better to pass BOTH rings to each person, so the guests don''t get confused. And maybe start the rings at the back so that by the time everyone has warmed the rings, it will already be at the front. Perhaps it would be good to have a member of the wedding party watch over the rings as they get passed so that person can direct the rings to the next person if a guest gets confused. Just to move things along quickly!!

Yeah, I was thinking of having them both passed at the same time, starting at the front on one side, and going to the back and then getting passed across the aisle and working it''s way to the front on the other side. We''ll definitely have someone watch over it to make sure no one gets confused!!

 

[musey]

Sabine, I had the same paranoid thoughts as you!!

What if instead of passing through ALL the guests -- because if they really took time to give their individual thoughts and blessings while holding those rings instead of just passing them around, it would take WAY too long, even with only 50-70 guests

-- you just passed it through your family and bridal party? Those are the closest to you anyway. I don't know if the other guests would feel "left out," though

 

[QOTDR]

I could see doing this for a small wedding of 20 people, but not a large one. I''m also paranoid and wouldn''t want it to go missing or get damanged. As a guest, I would think it was pretty odd.

 

[aljdewey]

Date: 12/17/2007 12:35:44 PM
Author: musey
Sabine, I had the same paranoid thoughts as you!!

What if instead of passing through ALL the guests........you just passed it through your family and bridal party?

I was going to suggest just passing through family as well.....

I''m not a huge germophobe, but I''m not sure I''d want my rings circulating through a ton of paws before I get it! LOL

However, saying ''we''ve asked our families to warm these rings to represent the warmth, love and unity of our families'', that''d work without offending the rest of the guests.

(PS - I don''t think anyone would be offended anyway.....I''d imagine most people have never heard of it, so they wouldn''t have any expectations otherwise.)