Should I be angry??

[AndyRosse]

I want everyone to tell me how I should react to the following situation, since I do not want to overreact!

Okay, so I obviously got married back in June. Everything was going fine. It was about 9:30 pm (the reception was until midnight), and I had to go to the bathroom, so my MOH and the Bridal Concierge unzipped me out of my dress (there was NO way I could even fit in the bathroom stalls in the dress, nevermind have someone in there with me!) Afterwards, I got back into the dress and my MOH zipped me up. That is when you heard "rrrriiipppp" and both my MOH and the Bridal Concierge yelled "oh no!!" The dress had ripped away from the zipper for a good three or four inches! I of course didn''t flip out because hell, what would flipping out accomplish?? The Bridal Concierge took two safety pins to try to keep the dress attached to the zipper, and we crossed our fingers. Needless to say, I didn''t eat or drink anything after that, nor did I sit down again for the rest of the night out of fear that the dress would continue ripping. We even rearranged the rest of the night''s events so that the father-daughter dance and cake cutting would be done earlier heavenforbid the dress ripped so much that I had to take it off. Thankfully, it didn''t rip anymore; however it did obviously make the rest of the night less enjoyable since every moment I was just expecting the dress to rip and fall off.

So should I just chalk this up to a freak accident? Or should some blame be on the bridal shop where I purchased the dress (or manufacturer of the dress)? I mean, I surely hadn''t put on anymore weight making the dress too tight...in fact I had been sick for two weeks prior to the wedding and had actually lost a couple pounds. And when I was fitted for the dress, I specifically asked if the dress was a little too tight and the seamstress said absolutely not, that it was absolutely perfect in fit. Also, I should add that this dress was NOT cheap (IMO). It is a designer dress (Henry Roth) and retails for just under $2,000.

I wanted to ask you guys how I should react since I have gotten mixed reactions from friends and coworkers. My MOH was absolutely furious and demanded that I call up the bridal shop and demand that they fix it (of course, I find her a bit biased since she loves the dress and wants to wear it for her wedding, so of course she wants it fixed lol). A coworker also placed the blame on the bridal shop/manufacturer and said that I should call them up and demand that they not only fix it, but also ask for them to pay for the cleaning and preservation of the dress. But others have not seemed upset at the bridal shop/manufacturer at all, basically saying that things happen.

So what do you guys think?? Any suggestions????

P.S. Here is a pic of the rip:

 

[AndyRosse]

A close up:

 

[Mara]

I personally just think things happen. I mean you already got married and time has passed, so why are you still upset/worried about it?

If your MOH wants it fixed because she wants to wear the dress, she can get it fixed herself. It doesn't look ruined or anything so it looks like it wouldn't be the hugest deal to sew it back to the zipper or whatever.

Sounds like you had some emotional distress from it at the time, but what is the bridal shop giving you $50 back or apologizing or whatever going to fix that at this point? Would it make you feel better to have someone to blame? You already had to worry about it the whole night and nothing will take that back. Stuff happens, it could be a myriad of things that caused it. Maybe your MOH or Bridal Concierge pulled too hard on it...which I am more inclined to believe than it being a manufacturer defect...though maybe they didn't sew the stitching enough. It looks just like the stitching gave way. There's no way to REALLY know what the cause was. I can say I definitely wouldnt be 'furious' about it.

I'd say, just move on and don't worry about it. I have grass stains all over the bottom of my dress that the cleaners were not able to get out but I was like who cares! It's part of the memories.

 

[galeteia]

I''m a theatre designer, so I''ve done a fair bit of sewing in my day. If you pay 2k for a high-end garment, there is an expectation that the garment will be well-made. From the look of the photos, it''s either the dress is shoddily made, or if you got alterations, the alternations were shoddily done. If you lost a few pounds before the wedding, it isn''t that you split the dress.

Coupled with the assurances of the seamstress that the dress was fitted properly, there is something going on with the dress that isn''t your fault.

If it was a $40 sundress that you bought off the clearance rack at a mall, then OK, the fabric ripped away from the zipper. You get what you pay for. If it''s a $2000 dress that''s supposed to stand up all night, something needs to be said.

Look at it this way: If the dress was made badly, the bridal shop needs to know that designers are giving them crappy merchandise. If the alterations are at fault, you need to let the seamtress know that her method resulted in a serious incident. (Being forced to worrying about your dress turning you into the next Janet Jackson at your wedding reception is NOT COOL) Responsible retailers/service people need to have feedback.

You don''t need to go in all huffing and snorting about it, of course, (it doesn''t look like you''re particularly keen on that route, anyway, since you are asking if you should!) but it''s important to alert the people who could be responsible. That way they can prevent a huffer&snorter from coming in later and ripping their heads off!

See what they say. They may offer to make some sort of reparations, because word-of-mouth is a big deal for such large purchase-items.

If they don''t, then it would be appropriate for your MOH to pay to have the dress repaired and cleaned if she wants to use it.

Hope that helps!

 

[AndyRosse]

Thanks everyone.

I just want you guys to know that I am certainly not pissed about what happened. Nor would I go in making a scene (that is just not the type of person I am!). I am just trying to figure out whether I should even tell the bridal shop about the problem. My current feeling is to call up the shop, tell them what happened, and wait for their response. If they offer to fix it, great. If they don''t offer, I plan on asking them to fix it and I''ll pay. The reason I posted is because a couple friends have said not to even tell the shop. It seems that to them having this happen is "normal" or expected. So I wanted to see if you guys would call or not

Also, the bridal shop did no alterations on the dress at all except for the bustle. So either the stitching was poorly done from Henry Roth or the bridal shop fitted me improperly.

 

[ladykemma]

I wouldn't bother. tell your MOH to sew it up if she wants to wear it.
that rip can be handsewn in about 5 minutes. Ain't no big deal.

edited to add - I'm a costumer too. most bridal gowns are sewn poorly, so much that I won't alter them for friends anymore. but MOH should go over the main seams with some white thread before it gets worn again.

 

[Mara]

Date: 7/9/2006 5:49:46 PM
Author: ladykemma
I wouldn''t bother. tell your MOH to sew it up if she wants to wear it.
that rip can be handsewn in about 5 minutes. Ain''t no big deal.

lol lady kemma you just crack me up. succint and to the point. i tried to say the same thing with 3 paragraphs...haha.

 

[ladykemma]

thinking about it, why didn''t the bridal concierge sew you into it? It''s what I would have done. needle and thread on the spot.

but then again I''m used to this sort of thing.

 

[galeteia]

Date: 7/9/2006 5:49:46 PM
Author: ladykemma
I wouldn''t bother. tell your MOH to sew it up if she wants to wear it.

that rip can be handsewn in about 5 minutes. Ain''t no big deal.


edited to add - I''m a costumer too. most bridal gowns are sewn poorly, so much that I won''t alter them for friends anymore. but MOH should go over the main seams with some white thread before it gets worn again.

They are?!

*headsplode*

Good thing I''m getting mine made.

 

[mia15]

I wouldn''t be angry. I sew, and I''d say it''s an easy repair. Why shouldn''t your mom or the bridal place fix it? Since the dress was expensive, they could certainly offer to do a simple repair. When I think about how much free alterations Nordstrom''s has done...

That said, it is shoddily made. The primary issue is the weight of the dress. If it was a light, chiffon kind of deal, tears are almost inevitable, but a dress so large you couldn''t get into a stall should have more "structure" built into it with reinforced stitching in the body. It might be a good thing to point out to them. Designer clothing vendors should have better than average customer service, and some of them do. Good luck!

 

[ladykemma]

Date: 7/9/2006 7:06:31 PM
Author: Galateia

Date: 7/9/2006 5:49:46 PM
Author: ladykemma
I wouldn''t bother. tell your MOH to sew it up if she wants to wear it.

that rip can be handsewn in about 5 minutes. Ain''t no big deal.


edited to add - I''m a costumer too. most bridal gowns are sewn poorly, so much that I won''t alter them for friends anymore. but MOH should go over the main seams with some white thread before it gets worn again.

They are?!

*headsplode*

Good thing I''m getting mine made.

yeah the last one i tried to alter i took the lining off to get at the seams and the d*mn thing thing started to fray. they hadn''t finished the seams or serged or overlocked or anything. I quickly sewed up the lining and told her I couldn''t alter it, she had to have them do it.

 

[ladykemma]

Date: 7/9/2006 7:28:09 PM
Author: emeraldlover
I wouldn''t be angry. I sew, and I''d say it''s an easy repair. Why shouldn''t your mom or the bridal place fix it? Since the dress was expensive, they could certainly offer to do a simple repair. When I think about how much free alterations Nordstrom''s has done...

That said, it is shoddily made. The primary issue is the weight of the dress. If it was a light, chiffon kind of deal, tears are almost inevitable, but a dress so large you couldn''t get into a stall should have more ''structure'' built into it with reinforced stitching in the body. It might be a good thing to point out to them. Designer clothing vendors should have better than average customer service, and some of them do. Good luck!

it looks like all they did was topstitch that bodice into the zipper. I would have sewn a seam then topstiched.

 

[Fancy605]

Good for you for not flipping out and for being able to handel the situation gracefully (Yay for calm brides!). I would probably be a bit miffed if it were me simply because $2000 is a lot to pay for a dress that rips for no reason, but at the same time it''ll be a pretty interesting story to tell someday, right? I bet the bridal shop would be willing to stitch it back up, especially if you are as nice and relaxed about it as you seem in your post (They''ll probably just be glad you don''t come in ranting and raving demanding your money back, right? I wouldn''t put it past some people). It wouldn''t hurt to ask them to do the repair.

 

[MelissaSue]

I think it is just something that can sometimes happen.. Do you know if the dress was even altered at the zipper? If you don''t know that.. then you can''t even know if the faulty sewing was the seamstresses (bridal shops) fault.. or the manufacturer itself. I don''t really think there is much you can do at this point.. honestly.. YOU could sew that zipper back on if the dress needs to be worn again..

The same thing happened to my friend the morning of her wedding..Her really may have been the seamstresses fault as it was her sisters dress that she had modified and altered to fit her.. they had to run it to the seamstress the morning of the wedding..

Anyway.. I think that you should probably just let it go at this point.. If you were going to do anything.. you should have done it the day after the wedding.. I think that if you called the bridal shop at this point.. they might think you were trying to rip them off.... its been weeks.. right?

Should you have been angry? Maybe.. but then again.. is there really anyone whose FAULT it is that you could be angry at? Even if it was sewn by the seamstress.. do you think she honestly KNEW that it would fall out?

 

[AndyRosse]

Thanks everyone for the responses.

I think I will just call the bridal shop and let them know what happened for future reference. It is either shoddy craftmanship by the designer or poor fitting by the bridal shop since the dress was not altered near the zipper. I might also send a quick email to the designer giving them a heads up; hopefully this is not a common problem for them.

And as for why I am just getting around to this, well we were on our honeymoon for two weeks, and the past two weeks have just been one hectic thing after another. This is the first time I have had a moment to deal with this particular issue. I personally don''t think a month is such a long time.

 

[AmberWaves]

Rascal, I''m sorry that happened! I just wanted to tell you that in my "Bridal Bargains" book Henry Roth (and sister''s label Michelle Roth) got a B+. It''s said here that the quality is very good. And given that companies like David''s and Alfred Angelo got Cs and Ds, I think this is good!

 

[mia15]

Good for you for your calm, rational way of dealing with this!

I agree with Ladykemma it is really badly made. I''m adding this because you mentioned not having had alterations done in that area. They should absolutely fix it in this case, and I''d be amazed if they refuse such a simple request.