Should I wait?

[suny27]

I think I have seriously started to go crazy. LOL I am really not a patient person and knowing he is holding my ring ......is making the waiting like torture. Today as usual I brought up the subject of our engagement. He smiled and said since I won''t just let it go I can have the ring now. He hands me the box and says "Here ya go, now we are engaged." I told him I kinda wanted some kinda proposal story ya know down on one knee sorta thing. He responds by saying he was planning something special but since I can''t wait............then he adds its up to me I can wait patiently or slip the ring on my finger now either way we are getting married 9/10/11.......so now I am sitting here typing this holding the ring box. Wondering what to do. I Love him and can''t wait to be his fiance but should I wait for the perfect proposal.......People are gonna ask how he proposed and what will i say I got on his nerves so bad he handed me the ring so I would shut up LOL

 

[brooklyngirl]

I think you should definitely wait. It''s less to do with having a story for other people, and more about having that moment with your FI. You''ll always remember the proposal, the question is what do you want to remember?

 

[Winks_Elf]

What exactly is the perfect proposal anyway? Honestly...have you decided on a date? Picked a venue? Talked to the church? Then you pretty much are already engaged. It seems to be a mutual decision with some couples (like us, although he did get down on one knee and ask me before he had the ring), where you start planning the wedding before the official "popping of the question."

It''s up to you. Personally, I''d be pissed at him for doing that. Not fair, and he''s kinda taking the coward''s way out of having to ask. He already has the ring...why hasn''t he proposed? Has he had the ring long?

 

[AprilBaby]

I say give it back and let him do it his way. It will probably be awesome!

 

[vc10um]

I''d wait. I''d give it back to him, and do your damndest to let him ask you. If you need to, ask him to keep the ring outside of the house if possible (with a parent or something of the like)...

I understand you want it...and now. But you have the entire wedding to plan. This is something HE gets to do FOR you. Let him have his moment. He bought the ring, let him give it to you his way.

 

[Sizzle]

I''m sorry I don''t get it. He knows you are anxious, why is he playing games? NO one wants someone to hand them the box and say "here" but you''ve pretty much already estabished you''re getting married and even have the day picked out. Yes, give him the box back and IF he''s worth marrying, he will unass that ring in the next 7 days!

 

[katomm]

Definitely wait. FI did this to me as well after I said something about moving it along but I locked myself in the bedroom when I realized he went to go get the ring.

It''s worth it for sure. FI only had the ring 3 or 4 months though so maybe yours has had it longer.

Would it cool your nerves to have him just give you a time frame? Like ask him to just tell you if his plan is this year or waiting till 2010? Maybe if you know a round about time frame you can sit on your hands so to speak and wait for the right moment.

While I agree it''s about both people, it''s important for him to see his plan through. It''s not all about him, but it''s not all about you either. Maybe if the wait is going to be too long for you, you can ask him to please put the plan into action sooner than he had anticipated but still do it the way he had planned. Talk it out, everything will be fine.

 

[miraclesrule]

GAH!! No offense, but women like you drive me nuts!!

My co-worker was just like you! Her now husband, not so much. But her impatience almost drove him AWAY from proposing. I had to have many heart to heart...okay well, maybe smacks upside her head...to get her to just "let it go".

Don''t rain on his parade. Let him have his special moment with you. ALLOW him the freedom to make it meaningful without you getting all antsy.

Back away from the box.... Don''t make me come over and have to smack you upside your head.

 

[Lozza]

Mine just did a similar thing. I had my HS reunion last night, and he said last week that if I wanted the ring before then I could have it, but he wouldn''t have time to arrange anything special. I decided to wait, it was more important to me that he ask me properly than to have my ring to show off.

I think you''ll regret it if you don''t wait!

 

[zoebartlett]

Suny, one thing I know for SURE is that you don''t want Miracles to smack you upside the head.

Seriously though, as hard as it must be for you, I think you should let your boyfriend propose in his own time. You know it''s coming, so sit back, relax, and let him plan it the way he wants to. I can understand his frustration, whether it was pretend or not.

 

[Collee]

Date: 11/7/2009 7:37:10 PM
Author: miraclesrule
GAH!! No offense, but women like you drive me nuts!!

My co-worker was just like you! Her now husband, not so much. But her impatience almost drove him AWAY from proposing. I had to have many heart to heart...okay well, maybe smacks upside her head...to get her to just 'let it go'.

Don't rain on his parade. Let him have his special moment with you. ALLOW him the freedom to make it meaningful without you getting all antsy.

Back away from the box.... Don't make me come over and have to smack you upside your head.

Sorry if you are offended Suny but I have to agree with this. Obviously he has something special planned and wants it to be a memorable experience and memory IMHO, your impatience and nagging is immature and selfish.

 

[lilyfoot]

Of course you should give the ring back to him and let him do his own thing!

You know he has the ring, therefore, you know he''s going to propose. Just sit back and enjoy this time. You will never get this time in your life again!

I know it''s tempting to slip the ring on your finger, and be done with all the pre-engagement stress, but that''s not a good story to tell your grandkids

 

[suny27]

Ok well I gave the ring back. He said it really didn''t bother him if I wore the ring now or not........he said he just wanted to wait until after he had a chance to talk to his children about our engagement. Didn''t want them to be shocked with me just poping up with engagement ring and he had done that the week before so it was fine. I explained to him that even though I am very anxious I can wait. He promised me it will be less than 6 months. I can make it 6 months................I hope!