Showing interest in other''''s diamonds

[kenny]

I work with several women.
And where there are women, there are diamonds.

Also we have top-of-the-line Zeiss Stereo microscopes in our laboratories.

Over the years I have complimented women on their diamonds and asked if I could look at them under the scopes.
They always say, "Oh it''s so dirty."
I offer to clean it for them.
I have never had a lady say, "No."

Ladies, do you think I am being rude?
Perhaps they say yes to be polite but really wish I didn''t ask.
I am not their supervisor (if I was it would certainly be inappropriate), but I am an engineer and they are assemblers and technicians, so I am higher on the employment food chain.
But I only ask if I have a very comfortable working relationship with her.
Would you be flattered, or put off by the attention to your diamond?

Keep in mind this is not some guy walking up to you on the street.
I have worked with these ladies for years, and the ring never leaves the room.
I always say something complimentary when I see the stones.

 

[Maxine]

I wouldn''t take my ring off and hand it to ANYone except several trusted jewelers.....sorry....(hope you don''t think I''m rude.....)

 

[murray93]

Well - no, I probably wouldn''t mind. As long as you explained why you wanted to look at it and offered to let me look at it, too, all the while explaining anything noteworthy.

Also - I would prefer to be called a "woman" rather than a "lady." But that wasn''t what you asked.

 

[kenny]

I too prefer woman to lady.
The woman at work prefer lady, and they have worked hard to train me all these years.

 

[pyramid]

I would normally only allow a jeweller to work with my rings. I would let other people look at the ring and hold it in their hand if I knew them. However, as you are trained to work a microscope I would allow you to look and would want a look myself to see what you were seeing

 

[pearcrazy]

Yes, I think it''s rude to scrutinize someone''s diamond under the microscope.

 

[kenny]

Thank you for your replies.
I appreciate the feedback and now I will not ask this again.

Also I appologize for posting this in the other forum.
I had no idea it was out of line.

 

[Erin]

Why DO you look at them under a microscope? Are you thinking of purchasing one? Do you then ask them what color and carat they are? Just curious. I probably wouldn''t have a problem with you looking if I thought I knew why.

 

[heart prongs]

I don''t think you''re being rude...just friendly...you said you''ve known them for years! I''d let someone I knew well clean my diamond!

klr...I actually have no problem with "girl"! As far as I''m concerned, there are far more important things in life to worry about than over the top pc-ness (I made up that term)

 

[makemepretty]

I would consider this rude. Only because instead of looking at it with your eyes you''re asking to magnify it. Which usually means you''re looking for flaws. That wouldn''t be considered flattering IMHO.

 

[flopkins]

hm.. this is an interesting question... because I work in a lab, and the first thing I did the week I got back from our engagement weekend, I popped it under the microscope to look at it! FI actually got kinda upset at me when I told him about it, bc he thought the only reason I scrutinized them under the scope is cuz i''m looking for the flaws... and I was, but not because I didn''t like them, or they bothered me, but simply bc I was curious what they looked like. Plus my ring is certed, and I wanted to see the number on the girdle. I know it sounds awfully nerdy but I was just fascinated!! It looked lovely under all the strong microscope lights.

This all being said, I''m not sure how I''d feel if someone else wanted to see it, I might question why they''re so curious. But I''m pretty sure if I know they''re just as into diamonds as I am, and love looking at them, I wouldn''t mind at all... as long as they let me have a look under the scope too!! hehe.

 

[hoorray]

I don''t necessarily think it is rude, but I can''t imagine that the results would be positive ones.... Microscopes will show up the flaws, but not necessarily the beauty. I don''t have a problem sharing my ring with someone who wants to admire it or learn about it in a positive way. Unless there is something cool about the inclusions that you see and can show me, I think the results in this case would be more "feel bad" than "feel good".

 

[Kaleigh]

I would be wondering why the need to put it under a microscope?? You''re not a jeweler and why not just look at it with your eyes. The scrutiny of the microscope is a little offensive, IMHO.

 

[MissAva]

It would depend on why you wanted to look...

 

[kenny]

We all do work under microscopes every day.
It is not some special thing I pull out of a cabinet.
We do electronic assemble and are alway cleaning things under a scope with alcohol and tiny brushes.

I know these people very well and have good friendly relationships with them.

I don't "Look for flaws"
Although we all know most diamonds have them and you can't help but notice them.
But I wouldn't mention them.

The workmanship of the cutting and the setting interest me.
I appreciate it, it is fascinating.
I find the owners share the excitement and appreciate the interest.

This certainly depends on the person, your relationship, your intentions and how you approach it.


I don't ask about the cut, size or color, or price.
I think that would be rude.
Also, these are not 2 carat E VVS1 type of stones.
These are working people.

 

[Buena Girl]

Date: 5/18/2005 1:39:54 AM
Author: kenny
...
The workmanship of the cutting and the setting interest me.
I appreciate it, it is fascinating.
I find the owners share the excitement and appreciate the interest.
....

If you asked to see a ring of mine and explained this is why you wanted to look at it under a microscope I would not think it was rude at all. I would be interested in checking it out, too!

If any of the women that you have asked tend to be more on the loud and opinionated side and none of them have told you it is a rude request, than I would not worry about it.

 

[treysar]

I have to admit, when I was in a jewelry store the other day, trying on wedding bands, the woman helping me offered to clean my ring, and then afterward she looked at it under a scope without asking me or anything, and I was rather mad about it. I wasn''t quite sure why she would do that - was she checking if it was real? Peeking to see if I had "quality" or not? I thought it was pretty rude.

 

[Momoftwo]

She might have been checking to see if it was real, or just checking the prongs. The jewelry store we go to has a policy to check any ring that they take in for any work to make sure the stone is real because of liablity. That way no one can accuse them of switching a cz for the real thing. The salesperson we work with said she''s seen her fair share of women come in to have an upgrade or appraisal done only to find out that their "diamond" was a fake. They were shocked because their husbands or boyfriends hadn''t told them because they wanted them to think they were real. Weird. And it''d make me rethink my relationship if I were them. If they''d lie about that, who knows what else they''re hiding. Anyway, I''d have no problem with someone I know fairly well handling my ring. I''d be curious to look under the microscope too since it magnifies a lot more than a loupe and my eyesight at 45 isn''t what it used to be. LOL