Things learned from shower.......

[So_happy]

Our couple''s shower was yesterday and all in all, it went very well. I noticed, though, that throughout the event I was making mental notes that would be helpful to remember come the wedding. I thought I would post them here and see if anyone else did this. It may be different for me as I did have a couple''s shower so the dynamics are similar to a wedding.

1. I do not want shots served at my wedding''s open bar. The shower had a cash bar but that did not stop our group from doing group shots more than a couple times! I do not even want to imagine how much "fun" they''d have if it were an open/hosted bar!!

I have to look out for thier best interests if anything!

2. FI and I really need to stick together more and make sure to introduce each other to unknown family and friends! At our party last night, we literally walked in and were wisked (whisked?) away and I swear I did''nt see him again until it came time to open presents. We both agreed that altho we didn''t realize it at the time that it would''ve been cool if he had introduced me to his aunt Deb and he to my friends Cara and John.

3. FI and I do NOT enjoy opening gifts in front of people. Can''t place our fingers on it, but it felt something like bragging or selfish or something.......just not right. And I remember really getting excited about the cuisinart griddler that we received and then when a great friend got us a double boiler (that also was on our registry because I really wanted it also) I remember feeling awkward trying to muster up the same enthusiasm lol. I mean, I was psyched to receive them both but I found myself trying to "equal" out my show of happiness or something. I also opened a gift from FMIL (who had left by that time) and thought it was from MY mom (who was still there) so I very happily smiled at my mom and said how much I loved the wireless indoor/outdoor speakers she bought us...........and then my FI whispered in horror that he thought they were from his mom

. I felt like SUCH a dork.........especially since my mom in the end could not afford to get us a gift. Did I say I am SUCH a dork.

? In my defense, the card was signed........"Love you both! Love, Mom" and geesh..........I''m just not used to another mom telling me she loves me!!!! lol

4. I need a guest book reminder person and I didn''t think they would be necassary! Out of the 40 people or so that came to our party, only 6 remembered to sign the guest matte frame thing that my BMs put out!! I would REALLY like to have those messages I now realize so now I know it''ll be helpful to have my coordinator or someome help guests remember to write something on my wedding frame.

5. I do NOT want to drink more than maybe 2 glasses of wine or champagne. I have apparently developed the lowest tolerance possible (so not enough time in my life to go out these days) so unless I "practice" more in the next 2 months, I am NOT allowed to go past 2 glasses. I had 3 and one of those shots and I literally had to sleep all day today to get over it!!!

. I''ve already told my MOH to make sure she keeps water in my glass at all times lol.

6. I NEED to EAT@!!! This was just the shower and I had 3 mushrooms and a piece of cheese from the antipasto platter all night long!!! (No wonder I was so affected by the alchohol!!). I never thought I''d be one to forget food but I did.

7. My MOH and my bros GF really are very caring and loving and creative women!!! As lots of you know by now, they threw a party for us that really isn''t my "style" so I was peeved about that. And it really, still, wouldn''t be what I''d choose if I could do it again, but boy did they work thier butts off for this thing!! They even hand poured chocolate into bride and groom molds and stuffed pinatas for us!!!!!!! CAN''T even express how fantastic that was!! I did thank them warmly but words can not express..........

8. White house black market make the BEST dresses that will get lots of compliments all night long, keep you looking "bridal-esque" during a 3 hr drive and then a 5 hour party and not evn wrinkle or otherwise become frumpy

Okay, so that''s what I learned. Pretty cool I think. It was like an unexpected dry run or something

Anyone else realize they learned a few helpful things about thier guests from the shower that they will use/have used at the wedding?

 

[Stephanie]

Date: 7/2/2007 2:24:31 AM
Author:So_happy

8. White house black market make the BEST dresses that will get lots of compliments all night long, keep you looking ''bridal-esque'' during a 3 hr drive and then a 5 hour party and not evn wrinkle or otherwise become frumpy

Ha ha! I am a manager for one of their stores! And yes, we do have amazing dresses. I am still not sure how it''s done, but I can work in one for eight hours and then go out to eat and still look fresh and not a bit wrinkled!

Glad you learned a few things!

 

[So_happy]

Date: 7/2/2007 8:41:41 AM
Author: Stephanie

Date: 7/2/2007 2:24:31 AM
Author:So_happy

8. White house black market make the BEST dresses that will get lots of compliments all night long, keep you looking ''bridal-esque'' during a 3 hr drive and then a 5 hour party and not evn wrinkle or otherwise become frumpy

Ha ha! I am a manager for one of their stores! And yes, we do have amazing dresses. I am still not sure how it''s done, but I can work in one for eight hours and then go out to eat and still look fresh and not a bit wrinkled!

Glad you learned a few things!

Cool that you get to look beautiful at work each day!!

I was so annoyed with myself once I was all dressed up because I had failed to think about the fact that we had to drive so far to our shower venue. I contemplated changing into something diff and then changing back quickly at the party, but I decided against that for a couple reasons. Figured it would be a little wrinkled around the waist and all but that that would happen during the party itself anyway so why worry about the inevitable, right?

Well, not a wrinkle in sight. I was so happy!!!

 

[sumbride]

Those are great lessons learned! I''ve heard that you will hardly ever see your new husband at the reception and you found that to be true at the shower!

And yes, no shots!!!

 

[jcrow]

i had some of the same realizations after the wedding.

- we asked for no shots at our open bar too.

- be prepared not just to forget to eat, but to NOT FEEL LIKE eating. that''s what happened to me. i just couldn''t. nerves or something. afterwards i was STARVING and when i finally did eat, i got incredibly sick. tmi, maybe.

- we had guest book pages for people to fill out at our shower. i didn''t except anyone to do so though. but, at one point in the night, i looked around and EVERYONE there was filling out a sheet. it was awesome!

- i have a LOW tolerance for alcohol too. over the course of 4 hours at the wedding i think i had a glass of champagne. that''s it. but i did walk around with my pretty toasting flute anyway. and yes, make sure to drink water the day of. i was completely dehydrated. i wasn''t expecting that either.

- don''t get overwhelmed with greeting all of your guests. it sounds silly, but at our wedding, i felt like we spent somuch time with guests chating about nonsense that i felt like i missed out on dancing and having fun. i LOVE to dance. we had a BAND for goodness sakes. but i felt like we barely got on the dance floor.

 

[Fancy605]

Date: 7/2/2007 2:24:31 AM
Author:So_happy

5. I do NOT want to drink more than maybe 2 glasses of wine or champagne. I have apparently developed the lowest tolerance possible (so not enough time in my life to go out these days) so unless I ''practice'' more in the next 2 months, I am NOT allowed to go past 2 glasses. I had 3 and one of those shots and I literally had to sleep all day today to get over it!!!

. I''ve already told my MOH to make sure she keeps water in my glass at all times lol.

I am with you there. I like to go drinking with my friends from time to time, but I am pretty much ridiculous after 3 or 4 drinks. (2 in some cases). But I am the type who gets silly and blends right in with a drinking crowd without ever touching one drop of alchohol. I never feel I''m missing out on fun by remaining sober. So, at our wedding I am probably going to limit myself to one glass of white wine and one glass of sparkling wine and nurse them the whole night.

 

[So_happy]

Sumbride~ Yes, I agree

I always read the "what I would go back and chance if I could" threads on PS and other sites in regard to thier weddings and I always feel like I''m making mental notes....but living it is totally different. There really is no subsitute and I''m so glad to have had these experiences in the best possible context; a shower like mine is a much better event to realize you drank too much, didn''t greet every guest, or didn''t have your signing matte signed than during the big day.

Jcrow~ I had been debating the shot thing until now. It is just not a good thing. I love the idea that my wedding will be a great and fun party.....but there is a line between a fun wedding and a drunkfest wedding......and my group just seems like they would abuse the shot option

. Doing shots in a circle just do not a classy and spirited wedding make

. I may actually rethink my martini idea, too. What are your thoughts on that? I mean, martinis are pretty much straight alcohol as well, right?

I know exactly what you mean about not eating because I didn''t even realize I had not eaten until the next morning and I was ravenous. Of course, I wasn''t....ahem......feeling too good by that time so I just had some water and an advil and went back to bed but I clearly forgot to be hungry. Strange! Again, I''ll ask my mom or someone to make sure I have an HD or a cracker or something periodically!

I love the idea of always having the fancy flute with you! I love ours so much and it''ll make for beautiful pictures throughout the night. I was thinking of having all my drinks in it so even if it''s water......... It''ll look alot classier than carrying around a highball glass all night.

Regarding tolerance levels, I am really very happy that only 2 glasses of wine set me straight..........I just needed to KNOW that that was my level. Now that I do, I will certainly NOT be going over that. I hated feeling even buzzed during my shower. It felt tacky. Don''t get me wrong, I didn''t feel all out drunk....but I was cognizant that I had gone a little too far with that shot so I did turn down the second offer a bit later. Besides......who wants to see the bride take shots???!!!!!!!!!! Oh well.....I don''t get out much so hopefully my shower guests forgive me and as long as I learn from this................

I''m so happy you received nice messages from your guests! I want that more than I thought I would because I really felt dissapointed that only 6 had signed my shower matte. Their comments are priceless and I''m pretty sentimental so I know I''ll re-read them all the time. I''m assuming, tho, that at a wedding, everyone will EXPECT a signing apparatus anyway, wheras at my shower, it was a bit untraditional maybe?

Fancy~ I am 100% in agreement there. And it''s just no fun to not remember bits of your wedding. It''s counterproductive at a point...and I''m just happy I realized what my point is. Seriously, I need to get out more!!! I''ll have my bacherlorette party, too...but I bet you I''ll have an even better time if I''m not sick the next day!! What I''ll do is nurse whatever I have, as you mention

.

 

[jcrow]

for us, i don''t even think it crossed anyone''s minds to have shots at our wedding. i was slightly concerned about some of the guests getting roudy (sp?) due to alcohol, but i didn''t notice anything if it did happen. our wedding was in the afternoon. don''t know if that made a difference.

if it were me, i think i''d serve martinis. if it''s the guest''s intention to get drunk, it''ll probably happen regardless if it''s a beer or a martini.

 

[akw94]

So Happy, thanks for the shower tips!

I am really glad you had a good time at the shower! I was thinking about you this weekend and hoping things went well. The pinatas and chocolate molds sound great.
I''m happy things went well!!

 

[So_happy]

Date: 7/2/2007 9:58:02 PM
Author: dixie94
So Happy, thanks for the shower tips!

I am really glad you had a good time at the shower! I was thinking about you this weekend and hoping things went well. The pinatas and chocolate molds sound great.
I''m happy things went well!!

Thank you, Dixie Things went well and MOH and BM did a really great job. I do wish they had more interactive "games" (besides the 10 mins for pinatas I guess) so that the whole group could come together more. I noticed alot of polarization.........that was okay but I definitley would''ve liked more inclusiveness. Not sure how that''s done but w a group of 40, I''m sure it''s a challenge.