Throwing a shower... need advice please

[meresal]

One of my best friends is building her house right now. She is also getting married in 2 months.

She has already had 2 showers, and will have a 3rd with her mom''s friends in a month. I asked her if she has had to add things to the registry already, and after a sigh she said she had, TWICE!

Another friend and I are throwing her a couples shower, and I started worrying that there would be no gifts left for the wedding after the showers are over... so, I said something to her about having a "House Shower", where she could receive gift cards to Lowe''s in order to buy the finishings for her house that she needs. (ie, washer/dryer, ceiling fans, hardware, etc.)

She LOVES the idea and thinks it will be a great way for her husband to feel involved. Great!

Now the tricky part... What is a cute name that we can call this shower and how can I lead people to the gift card idea, without telling them outright.

Any ideas would be very helpful! Thanks!

My first idea was a "Prep the Nest" Shower...

ETA: I need to call a Lowe''s, but at the moment I am pretty sure they don''t do wedding registries...

 

[Haven]

That''s a really great idea, Mere.

If the Lowe''s thing doesn''t work out, I once attended a shower where we were asked to give gift cards for evenings out in the couple''s new town. It was wonderful because they had all these gift cards to local restaurants and venues, and they said that they went out much more their first year of marriage than they otherwise would have. That''s something else you could do, too.

As for names, hmmm . . .

I have nothing. Sorry! I''ll come back if I think of something good.

 

[meresal]

Date: 3/8/2010 1:33:24 PM
Author: Haven
That''s a really great idea, Mere.

If the Lowe''s thing doesn''t work out, I once attended a shower where we were asked to give gift cards for evenings out in the couple''s new town. It was wonderful because they had all these gift cards to local restaurants and venues, and they said that they went out much more their first year of marriage than they otherwise would have. That''s something else you could do, too.

As for names, hmmm . . .

I have nothing. Sorry! I''ll come back if I think of something good.

Thanks! Did you think it was odd to be asked specifically what to bring?

I was thinking it wouldn''t be that odd, but then I started worrying that it wouldn''t come across right.

 

[Haven]

Well, you know me and my more traditional upbringing regarding this sort of thing, so at first I was kind of

. But upon thinking about it I realized that it''s a really great option for modern couples who are more likely to have the "stuff" that they need to start a home together.

And, it''s a shower, so the underlying purpose of the event is to "shower" the couple with gifts, so I think it''s much easier to get away with directing the invitees to bring a particular type of gift.

I had a holiday shower where everyone was given a holiday and asked to bring something to help us celebrate that holiday in our home. It was wonderful, I was totally stocked with a seder plate, Shabbat candles, 4th of July party ware, etc. The best was my friend who was assigned "Labor Day". She thought "What the heck do I get for Labor Day?" (Rightly so, right?) So, she gave me a bunch of pregnancy mags, some baby outfits, and suckers for moms-to-be. We''re both English teachers so it was definitely nerdy English teacher humor, but I thought it was hilariously punny!

Anyway, I think it''s pretty normal to have a themed-gift shower nowadays, so I''d be surprised if your guests found it insulting. (I''ve even gotten some shower invites with registry info listed right on the invite.

)

 

[meresal]

I LOVE the Labor Day gifts! My family will go on pun-runs and I am literally rolling on the floor laughing. My name is Meresal, and I am a pun addict

.

I''m glad you agree that it is ok. I was thinking the same thing regarding showers nowadays. So many people are doing "themed" showers, that it seems almost appropriate/necessary to tell people what you are wanting gifts to go towards. (ie... house showers where you tell guests which room they have, or like your holiday theme shower, etc)

Ok. I feel better! Thanks!

 

[lilyfoot]

I guess my only problem with gift card showers is that I feel like it puts a bit more pressure on the gift-giver. While I may be able to find an awesome gift on sale/using coupons/etc. for $20, I wouldn''t feel comfortable giving someone a $20 gift card, KWIM? I would feel like I automatically had to spend more than with a traditional gift.

I actually really like the idea though, because gift cards sound a lot more useful than more stuff (especially when they''re having so many showers!). How do you think your group of friends would take to the idea?

 

[meresal]

Lily- I definitely see what you mean. Thanks for replying. I need to think thru that. I was figuring that most people will do either $25 or $50... and didn''t think about people usually saving much money when you spend that amount.



Anyone have any cute ideas re: a name for the shower??

 

[sillyberry]

Maybe something involving a foundation? Like "Help X and Y Build the Foundation for Marriage" or "Laying the Foundation for Happily Ever After"?

That''s not quite right, I don''t think, but it might be a good play on the building blocks of marriage and a house (since it isn''t about the fun details).

 

[Bella_mezzo]

I like the foundation idea...I bet that your punny self can do something fun with that.

FYI, my brother is in South Carolina and they registered at Lowes...

I would love the idea!

 

[Haven]

Okay, it looks like the Lowe''s motto is "Let''s Build Something Together".

Assuming that you are going to make this a "buy a Lowe''s gc" theme, this is what I would do:

Rework the Lowe''s logo with his last name in place of the "Lowe''s" letters
Rework the motto with something similar like "Watch Brooke and Hayden Build Something Together" or "Help Brooke and Hayden Build Something Together"

And I''d do it so the logo still *looks* like the Lowe''s logo, just with their info on it, instead.

I''m not sure how you incorporate the gift details into the invite, though. That''s where it gets sticky. I''m not sure about that!

I did a similar thing with the MasterCard logo for bat mitzvah place cards that I designed--I made it pink and it read "MitzvahCard" instead. I know, the theme was really gaudy, but that wasn''t my call. I was just making the cards!

 

[wannaBMrsH]

I love it! And I would not at all be offended to be asked to bring a specific gift. I really think many people have themed showers now and especially with couples showers, you have to pretty much tell people...

We love going to "Stock the Bar" parties, or recently we went to a "Great Outdoors" one where the couple wanted all outdoors things. The bride''s parents bought them a huge grill and most of us brought nifty sporting things (camping gear, outdoor speaker system, pool noodles, etc.)

I love "Laying the Foundation for Happily Ever After" and I think that you can say something in the invite to direct people towards Home Depot and Lowe''s.

Something like:

The bride & groom support Home Depot and Lowe''s Laying the Foundation for Recovery Programs
We look forward to helping them build their nest with all your help

I dunno...I am out of inspiration now.

 

[CasaBlanca]

EDITED:

Oh drats! HAVEN did it better! I was writing as her idea was posting! Drats! Good idea Haven! Can I have first runner up in case for any reason you are unable to fulfill your duties?

Here is my pathetic entry....


I haven't had my daily dose of chocolate yet, so I can't think clearly. So be kind to me...

But for some reason I got a vision of...a house of cards.

On the invitation you form a house shape using store gift cards...just like you would if it was built out of playing cards. Home Depot, Lowes, Sears, A local appliance store, Perhaps a local electronic store, Perhaps a Local plant nursery. All places that your peeps in the area would recognize. (Or just all of Lowes like you said).

Take the store logos and or actual gift cards...copy them. Re-size them to teeny size...and then begin pasting them like bricks in the shape of a house of cards.

We are having a grown up house of cards shower. Won't you come enjoy the fun!

*********************

NO how about this? the outside of the invitation is a real house of playing cards...you write out...sort of messy scribble like in crayon "Your OLD SCHOOL HOUSE OF CARDS" have stick people and a stick dog...perhaps a black and white image of a 57 chevy.

Opens to:

HOUSE OF CARDS of 2010

Where the image of lowes logos etc, etc will Now replace the old poker playing cards.

(Replace the stick people's heads with photos of your showerees... and a cut out of their model of car and hopefully an image of their pet's head on the stick dog. Personalize it with humor.)

Come Help Build a House Of Cards for Jack and Diane and their new home.... blah blah blah (but better than Blah Blah Blah.) Get that line from someone who has had their snickers already.

Like I said, everything is foggy right now...

 

[doodle]

Date: 3/8/2010 3:35:21 PM
Author: lilyfoot
I guess my only problem with gift card showers is that I feel like it puts a bit more pressure on the gift-giver. While I may be able to find an awesome gift on sale/using coupons/etc. for $20, I wouldn''t feel comfortable giving someone a $20 gift card, KWIM? I would feel like I automatically had to spend more than with a traditional gift.


I actually really like the idea though, because gift cards sound a lot more useful than more stuff (especially when they''re having so many showers!). How do you think your group of friends would take to the idea?

Just figured I''d chime in on this point since I''m usually that gift-giver who finds a $200 gift on sale for $30 (shhh, don''t tell!). If I were invited to a shower like this and didn''t have the money to put a large sum on a gift card, I would give them a much smaller sum along with an IOU for being their assistant for a day--I can lay tile and paint like nobody''s business, haha! Anywho, my point is that with a bit of creativity (offering assistance with something, buying a massage or a bottle of wine to relax after all that work is done, or buying a basic needed for home repair rather than a gift card like tools or something), you can always come up with something that works within both the theme and your budget. Meresal, I really like the shower idea, and I think Haven''s reworking of the Lowe''s logo is super-cute!

 

[Rock_of_Love]

Wow! Those are really great names/ideas, guys!!!

I was thinking something along the lines of..."Help Bride X Start Her ''Honey Do'' List" or somethin'' like that...but the ones above are really good!!!

 

[hawaiianorangetree]

Date: 3/9/2010 2:33:30 PM
Author: doodle

Date: 3/8/2010 3:35:21 PM
Author: lilyfoot
I guess my only problem with gift card showers is that I feel like it puts a bit more pressure on the gift-giver. While I may be able to find an awesome gift on sale/using coupons/etc. for $20, I wouldn''t feel comfortable giving someone a $20 gift card, KWIM? I would feel like I automatically had to spend more than with a traditional gift.


I actually really like the idea though, because gift cards sound a lot more useful than more stuff (especially when they''re having so many showers!). How do you think your group of friends would take to the idea?

Just figured I''d chime in on this point since I''m usually that gift-giver who finds a $200 gift on sale for $30 (shhh, don''t tell!). If I were invited to a shower like this and didn''t have the money to put a large sum on a gift card, I would give them a much smaller sum along with an IOU for being their assistant for a day--I can lay tile and paint like nobody''s business, haha! Anywho, my point is that with a bit of creativity (offering assistance with something, buying a massage or a bottle of wine to relax after all that work is done, or buying a basic needed for home repair rather than a gift card like tools or something), you can always come up with something that works within both the theme and your budget. Meresal, I really like the shower idea, and I think Haven''s reworking of the Lowe''s logo is super-cute!

I think that offering your ''services'' is an awesome idea! Esp if people might not be able to afford as much as they would like on a gift card. We just renovated our kitchen and we had our ''handy'' friends help out and it literally saved us thousands. The plumber did the whole kitchen and we only had to pay for parts, the labouring was his gift. The rendering and plastering of walls was also done by friends and it helped the budget too.

I guess the idea would only be limited by your type of friends and the work that they do, but imagine the possibilities with a group of friends who were painters, tilers, decoraters, landcapers and handymen?

 

[sunnyd]

Both Lowe''s and HD do gift registries, BTW. That''s a great idea for a shower!

 

[vc10um]

Haven (and Meresal),

While I think the shower idea that you have presented is wonderful, I just wanted to point out that editing the Lowe''s logo and/or motto and using them on paraphernalia for the event is classified as Trademark Infringement (notice both the (R) symbol on the Lowe''s house and the TM on their motto) and should NOT be advocated on a public forum. The reworking of these logos and mottos is breaking federal Intellectual Property Law and while I highly doubt Lowe''s or MasterCard would come after you for it, those trademarked items are proprietary in nature and permutations thereof are protected under federal rules and regulations.

Just thought I''d put that out there.

 

[Hudson_Hawk]

Wow, lucky friend. I would love to have had three showers!

 

[missjaxon]

Wow 3 showers! I like the idea of a shower that is themed towards building there home. I know I would love a shower like that. Great idea Meresal!

 

[meresal]

Thank you for ALL of your ideas. I am putting them away in a speacial part of my brian for another event!

I am throwing this with another girl, like I said earlier, and I have decided to just let her do the invitations. I have made 2 different invitations for 2 different showers in the last month, so I am passing the buck on this one.

Re: 3 showers... Right?!?! Must be nice... lol.

Thank you again. I will be using your ideas for upcoming showers. I was one of the first of my friends to be married, so I will have plenty of opportunities coming up to use them!

 

[meresal]

The job of invitations has been passed back to me... 2 days later

Anyway... I am having trouble with the wording of the gift idea at the bottom...

Please help!

This is what I have right now, but I don''t like something about it, though I can''t put my finger on it:
"in lieu of registry gifts, please bring a Lowe''s gift card which the couple can use to complete their new home"

 

[Haven]

Oh no, Mere! Sorry you have this responsibility.

Hmmm, could you say something like this in the invitation wording:

You are invited to a
Nesting Shower
for Brooke and Hayden
on blah blah blah . . .

And then write something like this at the bottom:

(This is most like what you currently have
To help Brooke and Hayden build their nest, please bring gift cards to Lowe's, their favorite home store, in lieu of registry gifts.

(This would be my preference, as it is more suggestive than directive
Brooke and Hayden's favorite "nesting" store is Lowe's, so please feel free to give them store gift cards in lieu of registry gifts to help them build their new nest together.

It's always a delicate situation when you want to dictate gift themes, Mere, so I feel your pain. I've always just avoided the issue altogether by making no mention of gifts at all on invites! I hope these suggestions help!

 

[Haven]

If you go with a "nesting" theme you could have so much fun using adorable birdies on everything! I'm seeing those fat little birds on the invites, bird's nest centerpieces. Opportunities for cuteness abound!

 

[NovemberBride]

Mer, I am going to have to disagree with the others on this one. I don''t think it''s ok to ask for a gift card directly. IMHO, it''s pretty tacky and akin to asking for cash. Registries are a bit different because they still give you an option of which gift to choose. Here you are basically saying only one gift is acceptable, which is what I don''t like. Lowe''s does have registries, perhaps your friend could register there. I know most registries allow you to add a statement that says "gift cards welcome." That at least offers some choice in the matter. I know where I come from (very traditional area of the South), guests would be really put off by a request for gift cards on the invite.

 

[meresal]

Haven, thanks for the wording! I loved the nesting idea and found the cutest invites. However, I decided not to bother since the woman on etsy wasn't getting back with me... and I worried that it wouldn't really *fit* the theme. The shower is going to be at a sports bar and we will be watching a UFC fight. The poor little birdies could become projectiles...

NB- I totally understand. I am not a big fan of mentioning gifts on invitations, but in this case I feel like no one is going to care. All of the couple's being invited are in their young/mid 20's and other than her brother's wife, who has a comment about everything

, not a single person should mind. However, if we were inviting parents, this would be an entirely different conversation!

 

[Haven]

Now that sounds like my kind of shower!

We''re throwing DH''s 40th birthday party at home on a UFC fight night. I had a whole plan to invite all his friends for a dinner surprise party at Morton''s for great steak, but DH found out and said he''d rather have pizza, lots of chocolate, and an at home party on a UFC PPV night. It''s his birthday, so whatever he wants, goes.

 

[meresal]

Date: 3/11/2010 3:02:55 PM
Author: Haven
Now that sounds like my kind of shower!

We're throwing DH's 40th birthday party at home on a UFC fight night. I had a whole plan to invite all his friends for a dinner surprise party at Morton's for great steak, but DH found out and said he'd rather have pizza, lots of chocolate, and an at home party on a UFC PPV night. It's his birthday, so whatever he wants, goes.

This sounds great! Last year, for DH's birthday, I rented a party bus to go to the Astros game and then to the sports bar across from the stadium afterwards. Had all of his friend's come over about 30 minutes before he got home from work, and it was a big surprise. I've NEVER seen him change clothes so quickly! I love how guys can do the most fun/laid back things for their birthday.

If I did that for my birthday, about half of my girlfriends would actually show up and 90% would be wearing heels.