shape
carat
color
clarity

TIPS ON WAITING NEEDED

Status
Not open for further replies. Please create a new topic or request for this thread to be opened.

LIW13

Rough_Rock
Joined
Mar 28, 2006
Messages
23
.....
 
First of all, WELCOME!! The LIW forum is a great place to vent and find comfort during the (usually) painful long wait for a proposal.

Have you two talked about the engagement/marriage since the one year mark? Is it something that gets discussed even in a casual way? If it is really bothering you not knowing what his plans are, then bring it up in a casual conversation when the topic arises. You definitely don''t want to spring it on him out of the blue with the whole "where are we going/when are you going to propose" conversation. That could really surprise him or stress him out. Personally, I would talk to him about it, even in an easy going way, just to get the idea out there again and see if you guys are on the same page time-wise.

Just my thoughts..
 
Hi...yes, it does get discussed in the "after we are married" context, casually.
I just don''t want to push to hard....but, I also want to "check in" in a way.....seems like the time may be coming for that.
He always does exactly what he says he''s going to do.....so I had no idea I''d be stressing this soooo much!!!

Thanks for the feedback
emteeth.gif
 
Hi there!
35.gif


are we dating the same guy???....I''m 28...he''s 32 (little younger)...been dating for over a year and a half...expecting to get engaged this year and married in 2007!

I always have a hard time asking him for details....the other day I just blurted out "so when are we going to be together!?"...kind of in a cute/funny way and he didn''t take it the wrong way at all...jut kind of laughed!...he said it depends on whether or not I wanted to move in once I was engaged or wait until we were married...I said I would move in before getting married, but after getting engaged and he said "ok, then this year!"....geez....I knew that already!!!.
40.gif



It''s so hard....but I''m sure it will be worth the wait!!!!!. Somedays I don''t feel like asking anything because I know it''s coming sooner than I expect it...but some days I just wat to know! (at least I know he started looking at rings
27.gif
)...

Anyway...hand in there. One thing I''ve learned is to not take things so seriously sometimes and enjoy THIS time
9.gif


Welcome to the LIWs!!!!...

M~
 
Hi M!

Thanks for the empathy! somedays i am totally ZEN...other days...I want to know when sooo badly I feel nutty over it
emwink.gif

yeah...this whole "2006" thing....not as comforting as one would think!
I hesitate on asking the details too sometimes...because I know, he''ll say...this year, 2006, which...is no new information to me.
 
And M...

I read your "how do I" question....omg...we ARE dating clones!!!
We basically have had all the exact same exchanges of info.....is your guy Irish-Catholic too??? (LOL)
I feel your angst....my guy loves to be the decision maker in this.
it kills me!!!!
 
actually some irish and catholic too!...

2006 really is a very broad time frame...but when you think about it we are almost in April....so we''ve got 3 more Quarters to go!!!!!...I''m hoping mine will "take the plunge" by summer...but it really it''s hard to tell. MY BF wants the whole thing to be under his control....so I''m not involved with the ring shopping process AT ALL (a lot of the LIWs are and I think that might help make it more real). I''m also looking forward to being totally surprised though
30.gif


Sometimes I just sit and stare at my *empty* ring finger and try to picture what it would look like...I know, it''s silly, but I''ve caught myself doing this several times!.

I don''t know how much you guys have talked...but it looks like just as much as my BF and I have...so now there isn''t much to be said ther than the comments here and there. I tried approaching the subject from a "seasons" perspective...just to get an idea which season he would like to be married and then I could back-track to a timeframe that would make that season possible! hahaha...even saying that sounds crazy and a little over the top sneaky, but that''s what gave me the idea of no later than this summer
37.gif


M~
 
Welcome to yet another 2006 timeframer!!
35.gif
I''m actually very zen about the timeframe, because before he gave it to me, I thought it would be 2007! So yay! When I get antsy, I just tell myself that by 9 months we''re going to be engaged, and that doesn''t seem as far away as a year, you know?

Do you want to be involved in the ring buying process? If you do, does your boyfriend know? Bringing that up in a non confrontational way may be a good way to "check up" on the progress.

Good luck!!
9.gif
 
M:

Wow...we have parallel guys/relationships!!!
Yes, my guy is amazing, and always does the right thing.....he just wants it to be his call on the when...and figures "hey...she knows i want to marry her..and she knows it''s soon...that should be sufficient" (mine is half irish-catholic half Italian...oi, could I have chosen a more stubborn/ masculine breed!!! (LOL)

yeah...right....i want to know it all !!!!

We had a very long chat near New Years (after he had been bringing it up every freaking date for the 6months prior and it was making me VERY anxious..and I finally said "hey, um, when are we gonna do all these great things you talk about "kids, marriage, etc"....that''s when he gave me the 2006 timeframe....and the "I want to have all our kids in the next 5 years".

Rings: We both agree on classic large solitaires. at least I know I''ll like the ring. WHENEVER it comes!!!!!!!
I''m going to die waiting.
 
Thanks!

We need a 2006 Club here!!!! We can help each other along!!!

ps. Thanks for the tip on the ring talk!
 
hahahaha...
mine is spanish/irish/catholic....

and I also want a large solitaire (round)...Platinum...and he knows that much so I trust that I will love the ring!

you''re my PS twin!
36.gif
 
M:

oh sweety....we HAVE to keep chatting until we are BOTH engaged!
emlove.gif

He and I share July birthdays...so I am hoping summer time too (if not sooner!!!!)
 
Mandarine:

Just wondering...how often do you get to see your guy???
 
Only on the weekends
7.gif


that''s one of the reasons I am so excited to get engaged, move in, get married, etc etc etc...

it''s funny...July it''s my 2 yr anniversary with him...so I''m also hoping for July!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 
ugh...me too!!!
we live an hour away from each so we see each other weekends (and one dinner date a week)
our 2 year is in december!!!

so i am sooo looking forward to seing him more after he proposes!!!
 
we also live an hour away
39.gif
39.gif
39.gif
 
Date: 3/28/2006 4:45:04 PM
Author: LIW13
Hi...yes, it does get discussed in the 'after we are married' context, casually.
I just don't want to push to hard....but, I also want to 'check in' in a way.....seems like the time may be coming for that.
He always does exactly what he says he's going to do.....so I had no idea I'd be stressing this soooo much!!!

Thanks for the feedback
emteeth.gif
Honestly,.....I wouldn't push, and I wouldn't check in.

You say he does what he says. You say he's said "engaged 06, married 07". you say he mentions "after we are married" in casual convo. To me, this is someone who wants to marry.

If you press him for more specifics, all you're going to do is ruin any surprise he may have brewing. For reasons I can't fathom, surprising seems to be really important to some guys, so I'd really be hesitant if I were in your shoes to possibly spoil it for him and for yourself.

Sometimes, patience is the best virtue to have. The lease, etc. can all be worked out. You should plan your life as though you will be unengaged until 12/31/06, and do what you need to do.

Relax, enjoy and let it happen.
1.gif
 
Date: 3/28/2006 7:51:43 PM
Author: Mandarine
we also live an hour away
39.gif
39.gif
39.gif
We lived an hour away for 1 ½ years, then I left for school in January 2005. We''re living six hours apart right now, but when I''ll be back home at the end of April, it''ll be an hour again. Then, I''ll start school again in a local college, and we won''t be long distance anymore!! He works in the same city I will study/live in, and lives close by! So, I know how you feel, ladies.
 
Date: 3/28/2006 8:25:21 PM
Author: aljdewey
Sometimes, patience is the best virtue to have. The lease, etc. can all be worked out. You should plan your life as though you will be unengaged until 12/31/06, and do what you need to do.


Relax, enjoy and let it happen.
1.gif

Patience may be the best virtue, but it''s also the hardest to acquire.
31.gif
I agree that you should plan as though the engagement won''t happen until the end of ''06.

IMO, the seasons method only works if the guy is fully aware of how much time planning a wedding takes and how much time you want for planning a wedding!
2.gif
 
Thanks Ladies!

I appreciate the feedback....Patience is hard....sometimes I get negative (ie..omg, maybe it''s really NOT going to happen)...but, from what I am hearing, almost every LIW feels that way at some time....I know a year and 3 months hasn''t been forever (and it''s still a respectable amount of time)....I just want it to happen YESTERDAY...and I guess only guys know why this subject isn''t always their favorite....but it is hard not to want to chat about it with the person you want to actually plan this stuff with...UGHHHH......

Patience, Patience, Patience....I hear it''s suppose to work.
35.gif
 
Status
Not open for further replies. Please create a new topic or request for this thread to be opened.
GET 3 FREE HCA RESULTS JOIN THE FORUM. ASK FOR HELP
Top