I have the chance to spend about 10 days sightseeing in Germany starting mid-December. I''m going there to spend Christmas with my in-laws and will tack on those 10 days to make the price and effort of crossing the ocean more worthwile.
I will travel sans husband for those ten days since he will be otherwise occupied, will meet up at his mom''s a couple of days before Christmas and will spend the holidays all the way to Jan 1st with in-laws. Last year I did three days of travel on my own in Germany because of a similar situation, and I loved it.
This time around, because it is so many more days, I was thinking of inviting an old friend of mine to travel with me. We have traveled together twice before. The first time, a 5-day trip to San Francisco for my 30th birthday, was a lot of fun. The second time, we took an 18-day trip to Florence, Rome and Barcelona. That time around, we had fun but I found some of her behavior puzzling and annoying, it was really driving me nutty. I could not figure out why she was being like that when she is otherwise a really kind, giving person. Among the things she would do was get the window seat in all kinds of transportation we took, plane, train, bus, it didn''t matter. I usually like to take turns with window seats so that everyone has a chance to enjoy the scenery. But she wouldn''t, she would position herself in front of me in the line so that she would get to our seats first and grab the window one. When I asked if I could have the window seat she got upset. She also got really competitive with trying to figure out our way to places, as if she was trying to prove me that she could do better. Mind you, I''ve always told her that I have no sense of direction while she has tons of it, so I trust her judgment, but she would not relax. We had fun altogether, but it was exhausting for me to deal to try to figure her out. I thought about asking her why she was being like this but she does not take things like that well, to this day she holds grudges against our two other college roommates for things they said more than 10 years ago, so I''m careful about what I say to her. When I got back from that trip, I told DH that I would never travel again with her, vacations are for relaxing and I was not relaxed.
She truly is a great friend otherwise. She was recently my maid of honor at my wedding and went above and beyond the call of duty for us, we were planning a destination wedding back home and she was our stand-in for all matters we could not be there for. When we visit each other at our homes we stay for a few days and have a lot of fun.
So now I have this trip coming up, and I''m thinking maybe I''d like her to come with me but I''m not sure. I am inclined to invite her because she loves to travel in the wintertime, loves Europe, it would be a chance to show her my DH''s country, it would be cheaper for us to travel together than me solo, and we don''t get to see each other often enough (she lives back home so we see each other maybe three times a year). Also, while I enjoy visiting museums and shopping on my own, there are activities, like the Christmas markets in Germany, that are much more enjoyable in the company of loved ones because the atmosphere is so festive.
My friend is always game for trips, has the vacation time, the money and the inclination, so if I invite her she''ll most likely say yes. However, I''m a bit afraid that I will end up stressed out and exhausted and not at all ready for the intense experience of Christmas at my in-laws after ten days of traveling with her.
DH says I should invite her, and if she starts doing things that annoy me, I should just let it go, because I probably do things that annoy her too. Unfortunately, my ability to "let go" is a work in progress, DH is so much better at it than I am .
So if you were in my shoes, what would you do? Go solo or invite her?
I will travel sans husband for those ten days since he will be otherwise occupied, will meet up at his mom''s a couple of days before Christmas and will spend the holidays all the way to Jan 1st with in-laws. Last year I did three days of travel on my own in Germany because of a similar situation, and I loved it.
This time around, because it is so many more days, I was thinking of inviting an old friend of mine to travel with me. We have traveled together twice before. The first time, a 5-day trip to San Francisco for my 30th birthday, was a lot of fun. The second time, we took an 18-day trip to Florence, Rome and Barcelona. That time around, we had fun but I found some of her behavior puzzling and annoying, it was really driving me nutty. I could not figure out why she was being like that when she is otherwise a really kind, giving person. Among the things she would do was get the window seat in all kinds of transportation we took, plane, train, bus, it didn''t matter. I usually like to take turns with window seats so that everyone has a chance to enjoy the scenery. But she wouldn''t, she would position herself in front of me in the line so that she would get to our seats first and grab the window one. When I asked if I could have the window seat she got upset. She also got really competitive with trying to figure out our way to places, as if she was trying to prove me that she could do better. Mind you, I''ve always told her that I have no sense of direction while she has tons of it, so I trust her judgment, but she would not relax. We had fun altogether, but it was exhausting for me to deal to try to figure her out. I thought about asking her why she was being like this but she does not take things like that well, to this day she holds grudges against our two other college roommates for things they said more than 10 years ago, so I''m careful about what I say to her. When I got back from that trip, I told DH that I would never travel again with her, vacations are for relaxing and I was not relaxed.
She truly is a great friend otherwise. She was recently my maid of honor at my wedding and went above and beyond the call of duty for us, we were planning a destination wedding back home and she was our stand-in for all matters we could not be there for. When we visit each other at our homes we stay for a few days and have a lot of fun.
So now I have this trip coming up, and I''m thinking maybe I''d like her to come with me but I''m not sure. I am inclined to invite her because she loves to travel in the wintertime, loves Europe, it would be a chance to show her my DH''s country, it would be cheaper for us to travel together than me solo, and we don''t get to see each other often enough (she lives back home so we see each other maybe three times a year). Also, while I enjoy visiting museums and shopping on my own, there are activities, like the Christmas markets in Germany, that are much more enjoyable in the company of loved ones because the atmosphere is so festive.
My friend is always game for trips, has the vacation time, the money and the inclination, so if I invite her she''ll most likely say yes. However, I''m a bit afraid that I will end up stressed out and exhausted and not at all ready for the intense experience of Christmas at my in-laws after ten days of traveling with her.
DH says I should invite her, and if she starts doing things that annoy me, I should just let it go, because I probably do things that annoy her too. Unfortunately, my ability to "let go" is a work in progress, DH is so much better at it than I am .
So if you were in my shoes, what would you do? Go solo or invite her?
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