WE went SHOPPING! HELP!

[vizsla]

OMG OMG OMG!

my boyfriend gave me a "coupon" at christmas that "entitled me to a ring shopping trip" (and he would even go, but it wasn''t until this weekend that i was actually able to "cash" it in. needless to say, i researched like a mad woman and made sure that i had the jeweler pull all of the styles and stone shapes i have ooohed and ahhhed over.

but when it came down to brass tacks and i began asking my bf on the way home "on a scale of 1 to 10 how much do you love xxxx" "now, how much do you love xxx, do you like it better than xxxxx".... well his response was a bit shocking...

in the weee weee days of looking (like over a year ago), i thought about doing 2 half eternity bands stacked together as my engagement ring (i still love this idea, to me there is something so simple, yet classy about this look) and then either doing a yellow diamond eternity band for my wedding ring (and wearing it in the middle) or something else a little more special.. each engagement band would represent me and my bf and the wedding band would have some gushy engraving about 2 becoming one sooooo... (long story longer)just for giggles i had the jeweler pull out 2 shared prong bands and i stacked them together... and he LOVED IT! i mean just thought it was the best ever!...

having a center stone that sat extremely low was my 1st priority since i work with my hands (photographer) all day.. but here in lies the "help!"

1. his main concern is that i am going to love this look as much as he does (i do) and not be sad that i don''t have a more traditional e-ring (to my surprise he even said if that is the case we could do a 5 year anniversary upgrade etc") - anyone else in the same boat? or care to share their experience?

2. since the shared prong band at the jewelry store was SOOOOO expensive (we are talking 4K for a .5tcw band and 18Kwg) i know i want him to order from signed pieces (2 1tcw bands in plat for 2500/each) should i also get a spacer bar so they don''t rub together? i don''t want them soldered together.. will i have to worry about the rubbing?

3. do i go with the standard shared prong or the raphael? (i love the way you can see the diamonds from side on the raphael)

thanks so much... it''s close

 

[TBeck2000]

Congrats on the ring shopping trip! Isn''t it nice to see that the two of you are thinking the same thing about your future together? I know it was a major relief for me when I was able to broach the subject with my girlfriend. It turned out that we were on the same page and had very similar hopes and dreams for our lives.

I like the idea of 2 eternity bands for the engagement ring and then a contrasting band for the wedding.
If you look at the Raphael setting, it looks like you might be able to "seat" another ring right on top of the other:

If you have a concern about them rubbing, call Isaac and get his opinion (866-398-3074). He was very helpful when I called and asked a question about one of his pieces. I am very pleased with my purchase as well (a sapphire ring).

Good luck!

 

[E B]

Date: 3/21/2006 10:13:21 AM
Author:vizsla
OMG OMG OMG!

1. his main concern is that i am going to love this look as much as he does (i do) and not be sad that i don''t have a more traditional e-ring (to my surprise he even said if that is the case we could do a 5 year anniversary upgrade etc'') - anyone else in the same boat? or care to share their experience?

Then what''s the problem?

You both love the look (and it IS a classy look...very Audrey Hepburn) so I''d go for it...there are always upgrades and RHRs. As for the rings rubbing up against eachother, I have no idea. I agree with the above poster...call SP and see what they say.

 

[lovelylulu]

i love the idea!!!

 

[Blenheim]

That''s exciting!

I love the idea of eternity band(s) for an engagement. I don''t really have advice as to shared-prong vs. Raphael. What speaks more to you? What do you keep coming back to?

 

[vizsla]

i guess i was wondering if anyone else went "non traditional" and regretted it later? i know that if i love it most of all then that's all that matters.. but i just wanted some other people's experience with this.

as for choosing... i tried on a memoire (sp?) band at the store, so i was wondering how that compares to signed pieces... and from what i've read on p.s. some people couldn't really tell the difference between the regular band and the raphael from the top, only from the side.. but the description makes it seem like the raphael has much more fire and brilliance.. since i haven't seen either in person i was hoping someone could give me a more educated opinion.. thanks!!!

 

[Mannequin]

I think that your idea is terrific.

I have a relative who regularly leaves her engagement band off and just wears her two eternity rings instead and it looks very elegant and classic on her hand.

 

[Blenheim]

Date: 3/21/2006 5:39:20 PM
Author: vizsla
i guess i was wondering if anyone else went ''non traditional'' and regretted it later? i know that if i love it most of all then that''s all that matters.. but i just wanted some other people''s experience with this.

I had two thoughts on this:

1) Unfortunately, the LIW forum is mostly frequented by LIWs. With the exception of divorcees, most of us are waiting on our rings and haven''t had any time to start regretting decisions. Does anyone know which forum would be best for the married women to see this question?

2) You could go ahead and buy the bands now and see if you regret not having a more traditional e-ring by the time you get married. If so, you could an "engagement ring" instead of a band, so that you''re eventually wearing a more traditional set.

 

[Honeyfly]

I think that''s a really nice idea to have the 2 bands, Mariah Carey had something similar as seen above (they were full eternity bands though). It must have been her wedding band though as she had an engagement ring as well, but swapped hands every now and then. I am a big Mariah fan in case you hadn''t noticed....

But I always gushed over it, very sparkly and beautiful!

 

[vizsla]

you''re right Blenheim... maybe i should be in a different forum.... but i''ve always taken comfort (albeit not always posting to show my comradely) in these posts... it''s nice to know that being antsy doesn’t mean neurotic AND, most importantly, that i''m not the only one out there who goes thru some of these feelings.

i love love love that pic of mariah! i''m sure her rings are just sliiiiightly bigger than the set i hope to receive....

a girl i know did something similar where she received several tiny eternity bands and then got a huge rock for her wedding ring... this may be a good alternative, and that way i can chip in.

thanks ladies

 

[Blenheim]

Viszla,

I''m not at all trying to discourage you from posting here. I think we''re all feeling a little antsy about this whole process, and it helps to get others feedback and reassurance. All I was trying to say is that it might be a good idea to create a separate post (RockyTalk? Hangout?) asking the already married and engaged women if they regretted their untraditional engagement rings.

 

[sumbride]

As far as regretting it, I was just chatting with my mom via email about the difficulty of finding something I wanted to wear for the rest of my life... she put it this way:

"This is the lady who is on her 5th wedding ring and first husband so I can''t really say that it is a life or death decision. I get bored with my rings and just like a change in style and size every decade or so."

She REALLY put it into perspective for me! And actually, her engagement ring has changed over the years too... the original diamond went to my eldest brother for his wife. She replaced it with a bigger diamond which she then gave to my other brother. But when he was ready, she wasn''t ready to replace it with an even bigger diamond, which of course she wanted, so she picked a nice sapphire. She did this secretly, as he hadn''t proposed yet, but when the elder brother saw her ring, he said "Mom, I need to talk to Dad... he turned your diamond black!" (he''s color blind) The next year she had part of it paved. She LOVES her jeweler... and he obviously loves her! My dad just pays the bills. Is it any wonder that I feel I should get full say on what I wear???

 

[vizsla]

i know i''m so all over the place..

first simple, then halo, then 3 stone... ugh!

it''s hard to have expensive taste

and i''ve made the mistake of sending my bf pictures of everything.. i''ve confused the heck out of him too... he says "yeah i like that, but you''ll change your mind tomorrow".

so it''s back to simple and classic... and i can get this from qvc to quench my halo needs

 

[Scintillating]

Visla,
I love your two band idea, very Audrey H. and Marilyn M.
I think it's a modern classic style, very cool.
I thought about doing just one biggish shared prong eternity band for my ering.
I tried to talk to FI into it, but he wasn't interested, he's very traditional.
I ended up with something really traditional and I sort of find myself wishing/planning for an anniversary eternity band.
It was easier committing to the man than the ring.

I guess it comes down to your tastes. Fresh and modern. Timeless and Classic.
It's nice being a 21st century woman - there are lots of options.

Question: Anyone know if the Raphael bands have an issue with the girdles of the diamonds being exposed? Chipped stones or rubbing?

Scintillating...

 

[vizsla]

Scintillating! exactly what i was wondering.. i guess i''m going to have to call to be sure, or i could post over in rocky talk?

thanks for all of your advice.... it IS nice being a modern woman.. espically one who wants it all

weird thing and i never knew until i finally spilled my guts to my mom about what we''ve been up to (ring shopping).. but she had a band ring for her e-ring too! (i never saw it - my parents were divorced before i can remember, and she got rid of everything) guess it is classic and runs in the family.. i just hope i have more luck than her