Wedding date decision

[saturn]

Okay, so we''ve just barely started planning, and already we''ve gotten snagged on the wedding date question.
We want to have the wedding in late July or August of 2006. FI will be starting grad school this fall, and taking a full time course load in the summer and fall of ''06. I thought that it would be perfect if we could wedge the wedding between the two semesters, but unfortunately, it looks like this might be difficult. So here are the choices:

July 29 - FI is still in the middle of the summer term. He says that he has no problem with taking a few days off for the wedding, but we would have to postpone the honeymoon until the end of the semester.

Aug 5 - The weekend before his final exams. Probably not the best choice

Aug 12 - Finals are scheduled to be on the 9th, 10th and 11th. If he had a final on the 11th, then the rehearsal dinner would be a problem. He could ask to take his finals early (what reasonable professor wouldn''t allow it?), but he would basically not be able to help with the last week of planning because of exams. However, we could leave for the honeymoon immediately and have plenty of time before fall classes begin.

Aug 19 - Would be done with exams and could help with last-minute planning, but could potentially be starting online classes the week after, thus eliminating/shortening/interfering with the honeymoon.

FI thinks that July 29th is the best choice, but I don''t love the idea of getting married and then going right back to school. I''m afraid that we would get married, and then he would have to start studying right after the wedding, rather than us getting to enjoy the first few days of our marriage!

I think that I would prefer to have it in the 19th, with a short honeymoon. However, maybe the 12th wouldn''t be too bad if he could schedule his exams early.

What do y''all think? I''m kinda bummed because I thought that having more than a year to plan we should be able to find a date that would be perfect. I''d really appreciate some advice/input.
Thanks.

 

[jellybean]

We were in a very similar situation. My DH was in law school and I was taking pre-reqs for pharmacy school. We were both taking classes full time over the summer and only had 3 available weekends to choose from where we both were not in school. The first was the week before finals, the second was the week right after finals and the third was the week right before classes started. It was either that or wait another year as we didn''t want to get married in the winter on semester break.

We wanted the weekend right after finals but we had friends getting married that weekend so it was out. We decided to do the weekend right before school started again. Unfortunately that meant only a 3 day honeymoon to somewhere pretty local. We kept saying we would take a real honeymoon after school was completely done, but I discovered I was pregnant in between semesters. Thus almost 6 years later we have still not had a real honeymoon. Now that we have two toddlers, it will be even longer.

My advise -- do the Aug 12 date. The last week of planning should have almost everything squared away anyway. I personally was totally relaxed the last week with the exception of the place cards - and my mom and MIL did most of that. My DH had very little to do that week. In fact, my DH took this ethics exam for law school the day of our rehearsal dinner.

Plus having it on Aug 12 gives you time for a real honeymoon unlike us. That is the one thing we really wish we had.

Good luck - hope it helps!

 

[codex57]

Hey, another law/pharmacy couple.

I agree. I''d pick the Aug. 12 day. If you plan it out well enough, there shouldn''t be too many last minute details. Have the bridesmaids and groomsmen pick up some of the slack for your fiance during that time. A rehearsal dinner, if low key, would be a nice way to unwind from the stress of finals.

It may be difficult to get a professor to change the date of his exam. Yes, it''s possible, but I wouldn''t get your hopes up. There are some profs who just take themselves waaaay too seriously and won''t make exceptions for anyone.

 

[AmberGretchen]

I would agree with the above two posters on the August 12 date. My FMIL has been very insistent that me and FI take a real honeymoon - I''ve heard that this is a really important and unique experience from many different people.

I think that if you have friends and family to take up the slack during that last time period it should be fine. And the exam thing is possibly doable - I think it varies a lot by school and situation, but in college I had to have exam changes/accommodations several times and professors were generally very understanding and accommodating. I think especially if your FI has been a responsible and good student during the time he''s been in the class there is a good chance they will be flexible - at the very least its worth a shot.

Good luck!