Wedding Disasters/Funnies... share your stories

[meresal]

At lunch today, a few of my co-workers and I were talking about the funniest/craziest/most annoying things that we ever saw at weddings... I thought it would be funny to share here.

No wedding goes exactly perfect, but I love hearing the stories about random things that make you remember the night!


1. My wedding:
-As we were running out at the end of the night, the second photog, who was running behind us, got really close and ran all the way up my train, causing me to look like I hit a clothes line in mid stride. My legs flew up and I landed right on my back. DH couldn't even get me off the ground I was laughing so hard.

2. Other wedding: (about a month ago)
- Bestman speech was a drunken slur, but I did start paying attention again after I heard him use the phrase, "... and that is why everyone should leave a Legacy..." LOL, WTF???
- Bestman set his hair on fire at the end of the night with a sparkler.

 

[Hudson_Hawk]

DH''s aunt thinks weddings are all you can eat buffets. When we sat down to dinner she didn''t care for her salad so she ordered 4 more servings of coconut shrimp (one of our passed apps). We were on a cruise a few years prior and she''d never had escargot. She liked it so much she ordered a few to go and took them back to her room. Can you imagine coming back to your room after a night of drinking to encounter 3 plates of cold escargot???

At another family wedding her daughter wore a white sundress with no panties/bra and light up lucite stripper heels. She proceeded to gush about how "hot" the groom was...yea, the groom was her cousin!

 

[Hudson_Hawk]

Just thought of another one!

At my friend''s wedding this summer the best man got up and gave a speech about himself, his love for men and his mother''s "fun box."

 

[ash313]

Um, wow these are really bad!! HH, I am cracking up at my desk!!

Here''s one:

The morning of my friend''s wedding last August, a groomsman decided to have a celebratory champagne toast before the ceremony. So he pops the cork and the cork flies....right into the best man''s eye. NO kidding!

For logistical reasons, the FOB had to drive him to the hospital, where he was treated and released moments before the ceremony, and his GF drove him back very quickly, and he proceeded to do his best man duties.....

with an eye patch.

The bride had NO idea, but did wonder about that eye patch during the ceremony!

She cracked up when she heard about it...just glad that he was ok and all''s well that ends well, I guess!

Moral of the story: Be SAFE with those champagne corks! They have warnings on them for a reason!

 

[diamondringlover]

The worst thing that happened at my wedding almost 26 years ago was, my zipper broke on my wedding gown

my MOH was zipping it up and went OMG it broke, I thought she was joking...she was not!! Lucky for me my MIL had a small sewing kit in her purse and she was able to fix it, I held my breath the rest of the evening praying that the fix held up!

 

[sunnyd]

for all 3 of HH''s stories!!


Nothing particularly funny happened at my wedding. Hmmm well, my sister officiated and after my brother''s super sappy reading she says, thank you Ryan, that was...awesome. Completely seriously. You may have to have been there, but it was hilarious.

She also wanted to have her ceremony script inside an US Weekly so it would be in our pictures (Freke wanted to have Maxim instead). We were thisclose to doing it, but then we had a what-would-grandma-think moment.

 

[Smurfysmiles]

Best man was run off the road by a drunk driver on his way to north dakota. He was fine but the entire front of his car was busted up and he had to spend the night in sd (luckily with his sister) while it was fixed. The next day (of the rehearsal) he was all ready to go and took off out of town...only to hit a huuuuuge deer 15 miles out of town...he went back to the same place and they had it fixed up in a jiffy, Luckily this was only 3 hours from where the wedding was held. We had 2 groomsmen on standby to pick him up for the wedding if need be lol!

I inadvertently called my relatives old during my thank yous

It went something like this "We just are so happy to have all our relatives here who are new to us and our old relatives as well...WAIT! I didn''t mean that like it came out" resulting in everyone cracking up lol

Tripped on my dress walking down the aisle after the ceremony which the photographer so graciously captured on film for us lol

And the entire day we were walking in mud and leaves and ended up with heels that looked like this! Luckily my awesome nephew was there with a towel to help clean the heels (mud, leaves and goose poop!) for all the lovely ladies

 

[jcarlylew]

this thread has me rollin'' right now!

 

[Clairitek]

- I forgot DH''s wedding band. I was shrieking in horror about 5 minutes before we were due to go down the aisle. His father loaned us his. Perhaps we just started a family tradition? Who knows but his ring got blessed that night by the priest/DH''s uncle.

- One of my BMs stepped on and ripped my train during BP pics. The photographer got a great shot of my horrified look and her own expression. The funny thing is that no one else noticed but us! I was too afraid to turn around and survey the damage at first. Thankfully it was minimal and we just trimmed it up with scissors.

I''ll try to remember some funny stuff from other people''s weddings. I know there have been a few moments!

 

[meresal]

Date: 12/10/2009 9:58:28 PM
Author: jcarlylew
this thread has me rollin'' right now!

Seriously, these stories are craking me up!

The funny thing is, I only remeber a few of the moments that went exactly like they were supposed to... but the things that weren''t supposed to happen, I will NEVER forget!! LOL!!

 

[mrowmrowsmom]

I feel kind of embarrassed to post here, not because of the stories, but because my wedding was three months ago and I still haven''t come back here to tell you guys about it and post pics.

Anyway...during the communion portion of the ceremony, DH spilled the red wine all over himself! I think he was trying to take too big of a gulp or something, lol.

Also, right as we all got to the altar, my MOH dropped DH''s ring and it rolled under the hem of my gown. She had to stick her head up under my dress, in front of everyone, and fish it out! Luckily, she was very discreet, but DH, his best man, and I were both dying laughing.

 

[MakingTheGrade]

My brother in law got raging drunk (to the point where the bartender had to cut him off), and gave his mother''s best friend a LAP DANCE. BIL is a 6''4 220lb guy with a mullet, and his mom''s best friend was in her 60s...oy.

Also, we had a big chinese banquet reception, and I was really careful to specify that the entrees were "American friendly" as in no fishheads, no bones in the fish, all the seafood was pre-peeled/pre-shelled etc. However, I overlooked the appetizers, and the shrimp had shells on them. And basically my husband''s entire side of the family went ::Crunch:: and had to pick little pieces of shrimp shell out of the their teeth for the next half hour..whoops.

We also had a Catholic mass wedding since hubby and his family is very Catholic. In the church, his family sat on "his" side of the church, and since my family couldn''t make it to the wedding (aside from my parents), we sat all of our friends on "my" side. None of our friends are Catholic, and didn''t know when to stand, so they just did what his side did. The result was something that looked like "the wave" going on in the church pews, lol. Also, when it came time to take communion, his entire side got up, and my entire side sat there twiddling their thumbs making jokes with each other about being heathens

 

[vc10um]

Date: 12/10/2009 10:06:40 PM
Author: Clairitek
- I forgot DH''s wedding band. I was shrieking in horror about 5 minutes before we were due to go down the aisle. His father loaned us his. Perhaps we just started a family tradition? Who knows but his ring got blessed that night by the priest/DH''s uncle.

- One of my BMs stepped on and ripped my train during BP pics. The photographer got a great shot of my horrified look and her own expression. The funny thing is that no one else noticed but us! I was too afraid to turn around and survey the damage at first. Thankfully it was minimal and we just trimmed it up with scissors.

I''ll try to remember some funny stuff from other people''s weddings. I know there have been a few moments!

OMG, Clairitek, this picture is AMAZING. I love the expressions...I''m just glad nothing really awful happened to the dress!!!

 

[lulu66]

Date: 12/10/2009 4:02:36 PM
Author: Hudson_Hawk



At another family wedding her daughter wore a white sundress with no panties/bra and light up lucite stripper heels. She proceeded to gush about how ''hot'' the groom was...yea, the groom was her cousin!

OMG...i''m literally dying over here!!! these are all so hilarious but this one takes the cake! LOVE.IT.

 

[Hudson_Hawk]

She''s the daughter of escargot lady...

 

[Ara Ann]

Our wedding coordinator forgot to light our candles on the altar in the chapel, for us to use in lighting our unity candle. We had to ask our guests for matches or a lighter

It was kind of funny, but yeah, I wasn''t too pleased.

 

[rhbgirl24]

LOL! These are great:

My wedding:

Bouquet toss was planned to give to my sister and my maid of honor.... so I pretended to throw the bouquet (the other bridesmaids had lifted her up on their shoulders so she had a better chance) I turned around, handed it to her, and my stocking''d feet went out from under me. Flat on my butt.... great pics tho and I laughed so hard.

When we were leaving in the limo my mother called my cell like 30 secs after we left, which wouldn''t be beyond her, so I picked up the phone like "yes, we just left" and she told me that the venue hadn''t put our luggage in the limo!! We had to turn around and get it!

 

[MustangGal]

My brother took off a little early in the evening... with our honeymoon suitecase in his car. He did''t have a cell and lived 4 hours away.

When we got to the hotel at midnight, still wearing big wedding dress and tux, our reservation was messed up, and the desk clerk asked if we wanted 1 king bed or 2 queens

.

 

[meresal]

I thought of another moment...

Same wedding as the one I talked about originally. Aka, VERY drunk groomsmen (started at 8 o''clock the morning of the 4:30 wedding)

The bride and groom used our idea to do a private dinner before the reception. Well, after the reception started, I asked her how the dinner was, and she informed me that the best man and two other groomsmen were so drunk they when they mistanekly opened the door looking for the bathroom and saw them sitting in there eating, the groomsmen actaully sat down for over 15 minutes and THEN asked if they weren''t supposed to be in there.

 

[Inanna]

A few things that happened at my wedding:

* BIL (DH's older brother) and his GF slept through their flight on the Thursday morning before the wedding. Since they couldn't get another affordable flight out, they decided to drive 20 hours non-stop from St. Louis to the Florida Keys. They arrived on Friday and without missing a beat, jumped straight into helping prepare the food for the rehearsal dinner. They also surprised us with a fresh raw oyster lunch the day after the wedding.

* Much younger BIL also missed his flight. He went to the wrong airport... who knew there were so many airports in the vicinity of Springfield, MO

. My MIL was furious and refused to buy him a new plane ticket, so we were sure that he wasn't going to make the wedding. DH and I were devastated. At 2pm the day of the wedding, BIL miraculously shows up! I still have no idea how he managed to get there.

* 1.5 hours before the wedding I realized no booze had been purchased. Months prior, FIL insisted on buying the wedding alcohol (and I have the emails to prove it), so I figured he had it covered. Well, FIL had absolutely no recollection of that promise the day of. 45 minutes before ceremony start time, my SIL and cousin in-law grabbed our bartender and went on an emergency booze run with DH's credit card. They ended up doing a fantastic job and got back just in time for our bartender to prepare our guests pre-ceremony cocktails.

* My mom broke her foot from dancing so much at the reception. Luckily she has a great sense of humor about it (she had a blast at our wedding).

* We didn't ever want or plan on having a cake (we just don't like cake), but some family members conspired against our plan and we were surprised with quite possibly the cheapest looking wedding cake I've ever seen... and honestly, it cracked me up so much that I loved it! Of course we also had the delish mini-pastries that our caterer provided as well.

 

[katamari]

I love all of these and hope that the current BIW feel calmed by how funny we think these things all are now.

From my own wedding:

At our Ecuadoran DW, the translator we hired was not the best religious translator and constantly referred to "Sir Jesus," replaced "vows" with "compromises," referred to us as "this husband and his lady," and other mistranslations that had us in hysterics. We also had no idea how the ceremony itself would go down and it included any part we wouldn''t want included (read: all of the old testament gender ideologies).

At our stateside reception, there were other snafus, like the van service quitting a half our early, abandoning our last stream of guests, and resulting in calling back sober individuals to take them to the hotel (many of whom left much earlier because sober people rarely stay at the party as long as the drunkies). We also had about a million other things resulting from us just not having enough time to have the reception (since we did it hours after getting back from South America) which made the entire process too stressful.


From other weddings, I have seen:

A bride go to lean down to talk to people sitting at tables, only to fall over and take two guests with her (best wedding moment, ever--bride and guests were fine and only white wine spilled).

An entire table of college-aged cousins passed out at a very swanky and formal black-tie family wedding because there were full-pour wine pairings served with each of the 7 courses. This resulted in uncles finding cars to carry said cousins to be passed out in at the bride''s request (to not ruin pictures).

A cake topple completely over during the cutting--onto the bride--because it had been left for hours in the summer sun while the ceremony took place.

Quite a few really, really inappropriate bridal party speeches (my favorite of which began, "Between the two of them, J and C have been married a total of 7 times. SEVEN TIMES! Just think about that for a moment. SEVEN TIMES!").

 

[Ara Ann]

My brother and SIL''s wedding had a bridesmaid shoe snaffu.

The BM gowns were a really pretty pale lilac taffeta tea length (sounds icky, but were pretty)...so of course the shoes were dyed to match. SIL had picked up 3 pairs of the matching shoes for her out of town BM''s, to give to them at the church, two other BM''s had theirs already...

So as SIL is packing her things into the car to go to the church, she put the bag of boxed shoes on top of the car as she was loading other stuff in. But she forgot to put the bag of shoes in the car and drove off!

Once at the church she discovered the shoes were missing, then realized what had happened, so we had a ''shoe squad'' go out, searching for the shoes...they were NEVER found! And none of the BM''s had dressy enough shoes to wear for the ceremony, so we had to ask other guests to borrow their shoes!

In their wedding pics, of the full bridal party, my SIL''s train was draped over a couple of the BM''s feet, wearing the non-matching shoes and we took turns sharing the dyed ones for our separate pics with the bride and groom!

But that was the worst thing that happened and they''ve been married over 20 years now!

 

[Vancity]

All my funny stories are from the same wedding

My girlfriend was FINALLY getting married to her dream man. Bear in mind, that she had been jilted by this same man 3 times before. Yes, that''s right…she was left standing alone at the altar on 3 separate occassions. You can certainly understand, why on the 4th try, she was a teensy bit gun shy telling people they were getting married.

She confided to me that he had asked AGAIN, and this time he WOULD go through with it. We told no one about their impending nuptials until a few days before, and planned her wedding in less 2 weeks. It was very small...only immediate family and 3 friends allowed from each side. She had caterers bringing in a full hot meal to her home for the reception.

She is Catholic, and had her ceremony in the oldest church in the area. That day was nasty. Thunder/lightning/rain/trees down and power out all over the city. I was beginning to think it was some sort of omen…WOULD THE GROOM SHOW???

I told my then boyfriend, that I didn''t care if we had to leave at noon for their 5 pm service. I was not going to miss this wedding. When we arrived, the groom''s car was in the parking lot, and I could see him sitting there...looking verrrry nervous. I was prepared to tackle him, and spikebelt his tires if he had any ideas about bolting

It was a Thursday afternoon, and due to the rotten weather, the old church was freezing, damp and barely lit. There was another good friend of mine there, so we were happily chatting about how excited we were this was really going to happen. Out of nowhere, the priest appears, and tells us to SHUT UP. I''m not kidding. He told us to "SHUT UP - you''re too happy". I replied "with all due respect, this is a wedding, not a funeral". This particular priest was someone that my friend wasn''t familiar with. He was brought in from another church just for their union…lucky them.

The photographer shows up. Due to time constraints, my friend booked him through some agency, and wasn''t going to meet him till the actual wedding day. The photog shows up, and no lie, he is approx 48 inches in height. He brings no ladder. In just about every picture, our heads are cut off

During the service, the priest started out alright...but after a few mins. of some rather "unusal" comments, he goes off on a weird tangent and says "when couples get more comfortable together, they often feel free to start passing gas". In unison, my b/f and my friend who is sitting in the pew ahead of us, rapid fire look to me and say: "Did he just talk about farting during B''s wedding?! I''m like - YUP, he did!

The best man goes to hand the groom the ring, and DROPS IT. PING! It goes rolling down the old wooden plank floors, and gets wedged between the boards. All 28 of us in attendance scramble to the floor to find it. At that exact moment, there is a loud thunderclap, and we lose all power. The only light we have to work with are the candles at the altar. We do eventually find the ring (thank god for really shiny diamonds

) and the ceremony continues. THEY ARE FINALLY MARRIED! HALLELUJAH!

We arrive back at the newly married couples house. There is power *whew*, but the caterer has left a message that they are stuck in traffic due to a huge fallen fir tree laying across the only road that leads to the house. NO FOOD for the troops! I grab my b/f, and we drive out to where the catering truck is stuck. There in the darkness, wind, and pounding rain, we start passing the food over the big fallen tree planted in the middle of the road. We get the chow back to the house and everyone is happy.

Despite their somewhat rocky start, it''s 11 years in, and they are happily married (I think?

). Honestly, when I think about it, it''s STILL my favourite wedding