What do you think?

[Smurfysmiles]

So I''m ok with this situation, just curious and interested to know how you ladies would react. Apparently in fi''s family another girl is getting married in a couple months as well. Traditionally all the aunts get together and throw a shower (which I''m grateful to get at all . Well they are throwing mine in about 2 weeks. However, I just found out because not only did my maid of honor not get an invite, neither did my sister and mother. Today fi is going to ask if it''s ok for me to bring my mom and sister (I can''t imagine how it wouldn''t be ok?). Ok so that''s not the part I was curious about. I found out that the other girl getting married is also not a member of their family, it is the groom in that case too. So...because of this, they have decided to throw both showers on the same day. The other girls will be at 11am and mine will be at 2pm. Have you ever heard of this happening? At first I was taken aback and was like huh? But now I''m just grateful to get a shower at all from anyone. Just curious to know what you ladies think Happy 4th of July by the way!

 

[Rock_of_Love]

Hmmm...I don''t think I''d be okay with that. I could see doing it the same weekend - like if folks are travelling from out of town and it is tough to get them all together. But, same day?? Hours apart?? Plus, with no invite to MOH or your mom! Just a little strange.

 

[SapphireLover]

Kind of makes sense. Avoids family who live away having to travel twice, having to pay for two lots of decoration and chair rentals etc if needed.

 

[Porridge]

It makes sense, at least this way they''re sure to get everyone together for the showers, whereas if it were to be two different days, quite a number of people mightn''t make both. Also...you totally got the better time

 

[Smurfysmiles]

Well just thought I''d throw this in there The only people traveling are fi and i. Literally their entire family lives in the same town with the exception of one family who actually lives by us. I just hope I don''t show up to find that her party has dragged on a bit into when mine is supposed to start, I mean....awkward? lol

 

[Italiahaircolor]

Hmmmm....

No, I don''t think I''d be "okay" with this. But I''d also have to sit and think about I could really do to change it...which would probably be nothing.

I don''t have any advice...just wanted to let you know that you''re not alone thinking this is strange.

 

[mrscushion]

I agree it''s probably not the conventional way of doing things, but I would choose to look at only the good intentions behind this set-up and gratefully accept the shower.

 

[ilovesparkles]

I think its weird, and also think they should at least add an extra hour between the two events. I dunno, just strange. I would be kinda up set too. But there are some good points. I dunno. That is certainly a new one.

 

[brightlight]

Date: 7/4/2009 2:00:33 PM
Author:Smurfyimproved
So I'm ok with this situation, just curious and interested to know how you ladies would react. Apparently in fi's family another girl is getting married in a couple months as well. Traditionally all the aunts get together and throw a shower (which I'm grateful to get at all . Well they are throwing mine in about 2 weeks. However, I just found out because not only did my maid of honor not get an invite, neither did my sister and mother. Today fi is going to ask if it's ok for me to bring my mom and sister (I can't imagine how it wouldn't be ok?). Ok so that's not the part I was curious about. I found out that the other girl getting married is also not a member of their family, it is the groom in that case too. So...because of this, they have decided to throw both showers on the same day. The other girls will be at 11am and mine will be at 2pm. Have you ever heard of this happening? At first I was taken aback and was like huh? But now I'm just grateful to get a shower at all from anyone. Just curious to know what you ladies think Happy 4th of July by the way!

I can understand their logic, but I think the timing might be tight. How are they going to get everyone out and everything cleaned up by 2? From my experience, these things don't start on time. I would be worried about the other shower running into yours or a lack of energy b/c they've already had one shower that day.

Wait, are there going to be the exact same guests and only those guests at both showers? Will you be at the first shower? That would be a little awkward.

I can tell you that it would bother me that my sister, mom, and maid of honor did not get invited.

 

[KimberlyH]

It''s odd, but still nice that they want to give you a shower so I''d just be happy about that.

 

[Blair138]

Smurfy it is very odd, you are definitely not alone in thinking that. I hope that your mother and sisters would be invited, that is odd of them to leave them out.

I had a weird shower experience with the in-laws as they HAD to throw me a shower of their own, even though my side of the family wanted to invite them to our shower and just combine it into one. There are not many female family members on FI''s side of the family and we thought it would be easier. They didn''t

. I was really irritated and had to just keep telling myself that it was nice they were throwing me a shower. In the end they were both very nice and it worked out fine, my mom and sister were invited to the one FI''s family threw and FI''s mom was invited to the one my family threw.

You did get the better time

, but I do wonder how it will work-will her guests be thrown out at 1:45 in time for your shower? You will have to let us know how it goes.

 

[Smurfysmiles]

So talked to fi''s mom today, apparently it was the biggest miscommunication in the history of miscommunications lol. There will be 2 showers that day, however, the other one is not on fi''s side of the family, it is on one of his aunt''s OTHER side of her family and will be in a completely different town. That aunt will be running a little late to my shower but that''s ok. I have to say I''m pretty relieved I won''t have to deal with said awkward situation I had thought might be possible. Also, mom, sister and bridesmaids are now invited (fi''s mom thought there was a second shower they were throwing but there isn''t due to everyone being so spread out).

Anyways, just thought I''d give a new update

 

[mrscushion]

Good! I''m glad everything resolved itself.

 

[honey22]

I would be unhappy that such obviously important guests were not invited, and I would certainly mention it. I wouldn''t be bothered if I shared my shower with someone else considering travel for guests, costs for the people throwing the showers etc.

I do find it very strange that wouldn''t invite your Mum? Do they not get along or something? It sounds a bit fishy to me.

 

[tyty333]

Well, I''m glad it worked out...I wouldnt have had a problem with 2 showers at the same house though. I mean like whoever is throwing the
party only has to clean the house once and it might be easier for food prep to just prepare twice of much of everything. Wouldnt bother me.

I still dont understand why they didnt invite your mom/sisters. Even if they were throwing another shower that they would be invited to or
part of it seems like it would be common courtsey to invite them. (I guess this might not follow Ms. Manners rules though)

 

[princessplease]

I agree that it''s odd, and I''d probably be a little unhappy at first, but I''d be happy about getting a shower.
I don''t get the not inviting your mom, MOH and sister, though. That''s the really strange part.

 

[Smurfysmiles]

I think for my mom they just assumed I would be bringing her is what I got from the talk I had with fi''s mom since the two of them get together once or twice a week to get wedding things done (they are helping me plan since I live 14 hours away from everything). As for the others, she just said she didn''t know I wanted to invite my bridesmaids since it will be all of fi''s side of the family. Buttttt it''s cleared up and that is all that matters

 

[Rock_of_Love]

Phew!

 

[SixString]

Glad to hear everything is resolved!