Why men get married...

[trillionaire]

The Married Male Mind
A new book on American husbands reveals the reasons they get married, why they stay married and how housework is directly related to their sexual satisfaction.
By Susanna Schrobsdorff | Newsweek Web Exclusive

http://www.newsweek.com/id/57161

 

[FrekeChild]

There is a new article that came out that said the more housework a man does, the more sex goes on in a marriage. Wonder if it's related...

 

[lovelee]

Hahaha. That''s a pretty interesting article...

It''s like.. "If you take out the trash, I''ll have sex with you"...

Pretty even trade?

 

[FrekeChild]

lol...

 

[trillionaire]

but so true. I told SO that a long time ago. If the house is clean, we have nothing to argue about. He cleaned the house thoroughly once...

(we are LD)

So I stopped cleaning when he comes, too. Why bother.

That''s the difference between men and women. He always ''cleans'', but to me, unless you clean thoroughly, you might as well not have cleaned at all...

 

[LaraOnline]

I don't think even most modern women are prepared during their childhood/unmarried days for the sheer amount of work - in labour hours - that is actually required to keep a clean house. You can labour for hours cleaning one day, and the next day, it needs doing all again. The sheer repetitiveness outweighs the short-term pleasure you get from living in a clean house.

I can see why it is a real relationship buster for women... after a while, even with a really great bloke who you KNOW loves you, you can really feel like he is taking advantage of you...

My man's only job is to take out the household garbage bin, from the garage to the kerb, once a week. And you know what? HE NEVER DOES IT!!! Unless I remember to check up after him, the garbage bin is left overflowing for a week, when the next garbage collection service happens by! Yuck!!!

 

[princesss]

You know, BF has been living with me for a few months, and before this, I thought he was a clean person. Before he moved in, I was doing great about keeping things tidy. Having my apartment nice and clean makes me happy and less stressed. And you know what? The clean BF I thought I had? Non-existant. Dishes piled in the sink, he doesn''t CLEAN OFF THE COUNTERS even when raw meat has been on them (sorry, bit of a pet peeve).

But Freke, if you can find that article for me to leave lying around, perhaps life might be a little sweeter. Less stress and less time working on unfun things may lead to a little more time for fun, hmmm?

 

[Lauren8211]

Date: 10/23/2008 10:39:35 AM
Author: princesss
You know, BF has been living with me for a few months, and before this, I thought he was a clean person. Before he moved in, I was doing great about keeping things tidy. Having my apartment nice and clean makes me happy and less stressed. And you know what? The clean BF I thought I had? Non-existant. Dishes piled in the sink, he doesn''t CLEAN OFF THE COUNTERS even when raw meat has been on them (sorry, bit of a pet peeve).


But Freke, if you can find that article for me to leave lying around, perhaps life might be a little sweeter. Less stress and less time working on unfun things may lead to a little more time for fun, hmmm?

Haha, Princesss! I printed out an article similar to that and left it out for him to read. It still didn''t help.

 

[princesss]

Date: 10/23/2008 10:42:05 AM
Author: elledizzy5

Date: 10/23/2008 10:39:35 AM
Author: princesss
You know, BF has been living with me for a few months, and before this, I thought he was a clean person. Before he moved in, I was doing great about keeping things tidy. Having my apartment nice and clean makes me happy and less stressed. And you know what? The clean BF I thought I had? Non-existant. Dishes piled in the sink, he doesn''t CLEAN OFF THE COUNTERS even when raw meat has been on them (sorry, bit of a pet peeve).


But Freke, if you can find that article for me to leave lying around, perhaps life might be a little sweeter. Less stress and less time working on unfun things may lead to a little more time for fun, hmmm?

Haha, Princesss! I printed out an article similar to that and left it out for him to read. It still didn''t help.

Okay, plan two: Torture him with papercuts from the article, telling him I''m trying to help it "sink in".

 

[Rhea]

Date: 10/23/2008 1:15:27 AM
Author: FrekeChild
There is a new article that came out that said the more housework a man does, the more sex goes on in a marriage. Wonder if it''s related...

They are very related in our house. If the house is clean, I''m less stressed. If I''m less stressed I''m more likely to calm down, relax, and put out.

 

[FrekeChild]

Apparently not really new...but still...Link

 

[Keepingthefaith21]

Date: 10/23/2008 3:38:48 PM
Author: Addy

Date: 10/23/2008 1:15:27 AM
Author: FrekeChild
There is a new article that came out that said the more housework a man does, the more sex goes on in a marriage. Wonder if it''s related...

They are very related in our house. If the house is clean, I''m less stressed. If I''m less stressed I''m more likely to calm down, relax, and put out.

OMG this is SO TRUE! FI knew I was a bit of a neatfreak before we moved in together so he started to modify his behavior a bit here and there. He''s not always the best but he TRIES and our house stays pretty clean - for the most part. An organized home makes me happy and when I am happy I love to make him just as happy

 

[Rhea]

Date: 10/23/2008 4:53:08 PM
Author: Keepingthefaith21

Date: 10/23/2008 3:38:48 PM

Author: Addy

Date: 10/23/2008 1:15:27 AM

Author: FrekeChild

There is a new article that came out that said the more housework a man does, the more sex goes on in a marriage. Wonder if it's related...

They are very related in our house. If the house is clean, I'm less stressed. If I'm less stressed I'm more likely to calm down, relax, and put out.

OMG this is SO TRUE! FI knew I was a bit of a neatfreak before we moved in together so he started to modify his behavior a bit here and there. He's not always the best but he TRIES and our house stays pretty clean - for the most part. An organized home makes me happy and when I am happy I love to make him just as happy

We have different ideas of clean. I'm a piler. The bills go in this folder with one stack for unpaid that shouldn't be filed. The receipts go in that stack. DH is the actual cleaner. I've cleaned a toilet less than 5 times and vacuumed less than 10 in the past two and a half years. But it's still so important for each of us to do our "chores" so we don't fight, relax...and remember to have sex.

 

[jcarlylew82]

Date: 10/23/2008 1:40:51 AM
Author: lovelee
Hahaha. That''s a pretty interesting article...


It''s like.. ''If you take out the trash, I''ll have sex with you''...

Pretty even trade?

you mean i''m not supposed to say that??

 

[allycat0303]

Ugh. Don`t talk to me about cleaning. Honestly, what gets to me is the expectation that woman should do housework (or more housework) Really. I mean why is it assumed that men would have less chores to do? This might have worked when men went to work, and women stayed home, but this is no longer the case.

Yesturday, my fiancé said to me ''''you should do the dishes'''' Uhmm ok. I was at the hospital, went home and studied, then had to apply for residency the night before. Meanwhile, he went to work, came home, watched TV and played playstation. *I should do the dishes?* I was pretty close to throwing a plate at him, really. The division of labor at my house is very equitable.

Me: dishes, food, vaccum
Him: garbage, laundry, cat litter, and all outdoor related.

But I do expect him to pick up some slack if I am stressed like crazy.

Trust me when I say sex has no business in this discussion.

 

[Mrs. Tropicmaster]

Princess, that is so funny! [Okay, plan two: Torture him with papercuts from the article, telling him I'm trying to help it "sink in".] It probably won't work either. You'll have to accept him the way he is because it is highly unlikey to change. I remember once looking at the dresser with my BFs clothes piled up and thinking how much it bugged me. Then I stopped and said to myself- you know, I never have to mow the grass anymore, or rarely wash my car, or lots of other things. So I decided it was worth folding his clothes and putting them away without being annoyed. He still does it, but it doesn't bug me anymore. And I figure I do lots of things that bug him too.

I have to say, I am one of the luckiest women alive because my BF does lots of housework. The best part- he cooks! And he's a really good cook. And he loves to get me sparkely things!!! I am truly blessed!

--Future Mrs. Tropicmaster (the ring is ready tomorrow)

 

[princesss]

Mrs. T, you do have it good! Tropicmaster is a pretty fantastic guy.

BF cooks and does several other wonderful things. I need to remember that. But hinting (with or without paper cuts) never hurts.

 

[SailorsSweet<3]

Oh no I think I'm the man in my relationship!!

Granted my SO and I dont live together.. but we've spent significantly long amounts of time together. And although I'm neat and dont live in my own smut - my SO has the tidiness of the military driven into his head. I cant compete! I hate folding laundry neatly and he actually puts it out on a flat surface, pushes out the wrinkles from the item with his hands, folds, straightens the folds with his fingers and then lays it down. Who has the patience!!! haha Not only that.. I find that I'm the one asking him to put out more often then not

Maybe I should be diamond shopping for him?!?

 

[MishB]

My husband does most of the cooking, the grocery shopping, all the dishes, the laundry, and hoovers the floor. I do most of the rest (whatever that is). Yep, I wonder why he married me, he certainly doesn''t need me to look after him, I must be great in bed.

 

[PilsnPinkysMom]

Hmmm... I think that the MY definition of clean varies greatly from FF''s. I need to scrub every nook and cranny I can find, and he does a ''surface clean.'' I really don''t mind doing the majority of the cleaning, though, because I''m so anal about it. It''s better than him cleaning, let''s say, the counter tops & me freaking about him using the wrong sponge. (I''m generally laid back, I promise, just OCD about cleaning dirt)

FF, however, is much NEATER than I am. I don''t put clothes away promptly, I leave my books out, etc. He wants everything to be in its place. I can handle disarray, so long as it''s not DIRTY disarray

We have a trade-off: I clean laundry, he folds it. I cook dinner, he does dishes. I scrub the bathroom, he makes the bed. It works out ok

 

[radiantquest]

i want to read it. i looked and barnes and noble doesnt have it yet.