Will my e-ring affect my tips while waiting tables?

[Lynnchee]

If anyone has been following my previous posts, my ring is in the shop for some fixing. But I did get to test drive it for a day.

That first day I wore my e-ring happened to be a day I was waiting tables. Later that night, a customer commented on how beautiful my ring was and then mentioned that I should probably turn the ring around so that it shows only a band. That way it won''t affect my tips negatively. In fact, two people mentioned it that day. Would wearing a diamond ring really signify that I''m not in need of money? If I didn''t want money, then why would I be waiting tables?

The centerstone is .65 carats and there are 5 small diamonds down the band on each side - ttw is a teense over 1 carat. So it''s not huge, but has tons of fire from the spotlighting in the restaurant.

I thought to myself that I''ve never come across a server that wore diamond or gemstone jewlery on their hands when I''ve been waited on. Maybe I should take that into account. Then again, I haven''t really paid attention to jewelry until I was in the market for an e-ring myself.

This is my first and only piece of jewelry I have ever owned. I want to wear it always, but I wonder how much it would affect my tip income. Do any PSers out there have a different perception of a server whom wears jewelry vs one who doesn''t? Or, does it depend on how "bling bling" it is?

 

[neatfreak]

I think wearing any kind of wedding band/ering can negatively affect your tips if you work in a place that single men frequent. At least the friends I have had who waited tables said so, they always took off any kind of jewelry that signaled they were in a relationship. Thought their tips were better.

 

[Lynnchee]

That's an interesting thought. Though, our restaurant is more of a romantic place - darkly lit and semi private booths. A lot couples married or dating come to visit us. We sometimes get single people at the sushi bar and they always tip great. I'm always peppy and talktative though.

 

[Sizzle]

We were in Hawaii last year and the woman waiting on us had a HUGE e-ring. At least 2 1/2 carats. I was a bit jealous.. I commented that it was fabulous and she excitedly told me she was waiting tables as a second job to help pay for her wedding. The people at the table overheard the conversation and got into a whole tangent about how greedy young people are today (she looked about 21). One woman said she wasn''t going to give her a big tip because there were people who REALLY needed the money. I''m amazed at how judgemental people can be!

 

[strmrdr]

yes it likely will.
A friend of mine got into a huge fight with his fiance over it because she stopped wearing it at work because her tips went down.
They ended up breaking up but not really because of that but it was part of it.

 

[Lexie]

That's a really interesting question!

I'm in the restaurant business as well (albeit, as a hostess), so I'm not quite sure what the answer would be. At the moment, we only have one female waitress, one female waitress/bartender, and one female bartender.. two are married, and the other has a boyfriend. I'm not sure whether they would be able to shed any light, but when I go to work tomorrow, I'll pose the question to some people, and get back to ya

It seems to me that since your ring is relatively modest in size and not overly "blingy", that you shouldn't have any problems. Plus, on the bright side, you hopefully won't get hit on too much

It gets kind of annoying after a while. Too many male customers.. bleh

By the way, I saw your ring on one of your other threads, and it's quite beautiful! Hopefully your problem with it will get fixed

 

[Kaleigh]

Honestly when we go out to eat, I am so interested in the food, it may be the only time I don''t care about bling. If my waitress had a big ole rock, I still wouldn''t notice... It''s the food I care about and the service.

 

[arjunajane]

Date: 6/8/2008 11:51:47 PM
Author: strmrdr
yes it likely will.
A friend of mine got into a huge fight with his fiance over it because she stopped wearing it at work because her tips went down.
They ended up breaking up but not really because of that but it was part of it.

Whoa! thats really sad, I hope just the ering thing wasn''t the main reason!

I agree, its a bummer to admit it, but if you''re working in a situation where you rely on the tips I don''t think appearing engaged/married helps..

 

[miraclesrule]

It''s crazy what people choose to think about other people they don''t know anything about. Baffling.
See, I would have had the opposite reaction. If I overheard that someone was working so she could help pay for her wedding, I would be more likely to give her a BIGGER tip, not withhold a tip. :::shaking head:::::

However, having said that, I can believe that it would affect your tips...but not enough to give a rat''s behind. I remember when I was waiting tables and I was pregnant. While on break in the back, before the dreaded sidework, I would pull out my bills and organize them so I didn''t have them fly out of my skirt pocket. Other "waitresses", as we were known back then would make some snarky comment about how they should pad their bellies so they can get more tips too!! I was like "WHAT?"

I couldn''t help myself, so I told them I had always gotten a lot of tips because I give exceptional service. I remember to ask a patron if they want that milk with their meal or now...and I remember to bring it with the meal, or say "I''m bringing your glass of cold milk right now" as I set the plate down. I always remembered to check the special orders before I served them. I wouldn''t even take them off the line if they had tomatoes and shouldn''t have. The cook had to fix it first. I always communicated with the patrons if food was going to take a bit longer and chatted them up...even if they hated the meal. But then again, I am a people person and I love,

, love waiting tables. Hell, I even tried to go back to waiting tables, but after a career making lot of money, they apparently didn''t think I was serious...or that something was seriously wrong with me.

Just be a good worker, that''s how you will get good tips. If that doesn''t work, just tell everyone it''s a total fake ring and say "Realllllly, do you think I would be working here if this bad boy were real???"

 

[krisvrn]

Hmm I have never thought of this but I guess it could negatively affect your tips if you work in a place where there are lots of men that come in. As a woman, I wouldn''t tip against you because of your ring, I''d only tip against you if you gave me really poor service.

 

[Lynnchee]

Date: 6/9/2008 12:34:56 AM
Author: Kaleigh
Honestly when we go out to eat, I am so interested in the food, it may be the only time I don''t care about bling. If my waitress had a big ole rock, I still wouldn''t notice... It''s the food I care about and the service.

I agree with you. If your service is super and the food is great, what difference would the server wearing a diamond make a difference? I might raise an eyebrow if she was, like, absolutely dripping with diamonds. But, no one who does that would really be a server.

In actuality, I am a partner of the restaurant. Sometimes, I have to get on the floor and be a server. Especially during training periods or if someone has quit. So I don''t really care whether I get tips or not. What I do care is that the tip amongst our servers are pooled. So If i''m getting less tip simply because I''m wearing a ring, then its the other servers that get cheated. But I still don''t want to take off my ring simply because some people don''t like the idea of tipping someone on based on false judgments.

We do have a lot of regular customers that know who we are and consistently tip a certain percentage. Wether some of them will recognize that I actually have a ring is yet to be determined. Maybe i''ll do my own little test.

 

[Lynnchee]

Date: 6/8/2008 11:51:47 PM
Author: strmrdr
yes it likely will.
A friend of mine got into a huge fight with his fiance over it because she stopped wearing it at work because her tips went down.
They ended up breaking up but not really because of that but it was part of it.

Thats terrible! That makes me wonder if my fiance would understand if I started taking it off during work because of this reason. What do you choose though? To wear a gift given to you with love or a slightly bigger income.

At least, I would hope a person who normally tips 20% wouldn''t suddenly tip 10% just because they thought they didn''t need the money.

 

[Lynnchee]

Date: 6/9/2008 12:07:25 AM
Author: Lexie


By the way, I saw your ring on one of your other threads, and it''s quite beautiful! Hopefully your problem with it will get fixed

I almost forgot. Thank you Lexie!!

 

[FrekeChild]

As a former server I don''t know that I''d want to wear an ering while serving anyway, because I''d use my hands so much, plus with my OCD hand washing and picking up grubby plates and stuf...not a pretty picture. As for tips...I''m not sure... I think you should experiment, and get back to use with the results!

 

[isaku5]

Since the kids are grown and gone, my DH and I often go out to eat. The majority of the servers (hate that term, btw, as it implies "servant" to me) wear small rings on their ring fingers, or just plain bands (even if they''re not married).

I think a lot depends on the area where you live, and the type of clientele that frequent the place. Since it''s a romantic spot, where you''re not likely to get "hit on", your ring shouldn''t detract from your tips. Having said that, you''ve had one male customer who definitely noticed your sparkly ring and commented in a rather negative way. Everyone''s different so it may or may not be an issue, but definitely discuss it with your DF.

 

[Lynnchee]

Date: 6/9/2008 11:34:03 AM
Author: isaku5
Since the kids are grown and gone, my DH and I often go out to eat. The majority of the servers (hate that term, btw, as it implies ''servant'' to me) wear small rings on their ring fingers, or just plain bands (even if they''re not married).

I think a lot depends on the area where you live, and the type of clientele that frequent the place. Since it''s a romantic spot, where you''re not likely to get ''hit on'', your ring shouldn''t detract from your tips. Having said that, you''ve had one male customer who definitely noticed your sparkly ring and commented in a rather negative way. Everyone''s different so it may or may not be an issue, but definitely discuss it with your DF.

Going a little off topic, but I always disliked calling our employees servers too. I think it''s an effort to keep the job from being gender specific - Or being too lazy to try and say waiter or waitress. Our ladies don''t like being addressed as "waitress" either. But then again, I''ve never heard a customer address them as "hey server" either. Usually our customers know their names or it''s just "excuse me miss/sir". Funny how I never really thought about it.

 

[NewEnglandLady]

Date: 6/9/2008 12:34:56 AM
Author: Kaleigh
Honestly when we go out to eat, I am so interested in the food, it may be the only time I don't care about bling. If my waitress had a big ole rock, I still wouldn't notice... It's the food I care about and the service.

Same here! Strangely enough, I don't think I've ever looked for a ring on a waitress's finger, and even if I did, I wouldn't even consider that when calculating a tip.

 

[VegasAngel]

I would wear a simple band while you are at work. It does depend on the type of establishment. If I was working in a young crowd type of place or was bartending I probably wouldnt even wear a ring. I personally do notice other peoples jewelry but I would never base my tip on whether or not I thought they needed it, geez.

This is not exactly the same thing but I have stopped wearing my ring to job interviews as I had an interviewer stare at it for a while & then proceed to question my being out of work since 2005

Maybe she thought I didnt really need to work or could afford to stay home & wouldnt take the job seriously-who knows.

 

[vslover]

While I think a larger ering could negatively impact your tips (possible...though I think it''s dumb) I think your ring is fairly modest and shouldn''t be a problem. I personally would NOT take the ring off because I was worried about that though...seems kind of dishonest and offensive to your FI.

 

[Bliss]

I would say wear your pretty ring with pride.

Anyone who would tip less because you are wearing a nice ring is probably cheap anyway. I can't imagine anyone tipping less than 20% for any reason. Even if the food came out wrong, is not right or etc., it's not usually even the server's fault. That having been said... congrats! Most people I would think would tip more if they notice because they'd think you're saving for a wedding.

 

[jewelerman]

I agree that the ring may affect you tips.But i think you should remove it mainly because of the amount of wear and tear it recieves while doing your job...i was raised in the Hotel/food service trade and the servers were damaging the gems in thier rings and loosing diamonds when prongs would get pulled back while serving,clearing or cleaning with chemical based cleaners.my father recommended that rings with stones be removed after a server found that her opal had broken in half while working...Dad hoped it wasnt in some ones dinner or salad!

 

[JulieN]

Actually, if I knew you were a partner of the restaurant, I would not tip you at all.

But generally speaking, I have once noticed a server''s e-ring, and that was only because I was alone, sitting at a bar (nothing to do.)

 

[Bliss]

So if people won't tip if you're wearing nice bling, should you show up for work wearing rags... looking destitute and sporting artificial black teeth? Seriously.

LOL. You have to laugh at some point!!! It's so ridiculous! Hehehehe.

I don't care if the waiter or waitress is sporting LV shoes and wearing a 10 ct. rock. They're getting a nice tip! That's a hard job!

Lots of college kids and single moms. And if some are in the service industry for careers because they love people and they're cleaning up in terms of cash...why not? My personal philosophy is, if you are going to cheap out on a tip - you really shouldn't be going out to eat!

 

[vslover]

Ah, well, if we had known you were a partner/owner of the restaurant that might have changed things as you''re not really supposed to be getting tips anyway. I''d hope you don''t take part of others tips when they are "pooled" at the end of the night!

 

[divergrrl]

I tip based on service and service alone. I don''t care if someone has a great ring or not, other than to ogle it appreciatively....

I enjoy seeing beautiful jewelry on other people, and I don''t care if they are a server in a restaurant, or any other job for that matter.

 

[asscherisme]

I tip on service alone and if I get great service I leave a great tip. I don''t care what he server is wearing on her or his hand.

However, I would think that a ring may turn some off. Someone who appears single may get bigger tips from single customers. Just a thought. I would leave it at home.

 

[swingirl]

This is an odd subject but here''s my take on it. (I was a waitress years ago)

A "server" is in the position of serving people and making them feel comfortable while they are dining out. Anything that makes them feel uncomfortable will affect your tip. So having black teeth or wearing rags will make them uncomfortable. Also having a server behave like they are "above" the customer will make some people uncomfortable, too. I am not saying that this is what you are doing but when you look financially more well-off than the people you are serving, that might make they uncomfortable...like geez, if you can afford that then you don''t need my money. People aren''t always fair, some are jealous, some are stupid, some are stingy.

I think your ring sounds very modest and appropriate for an ering. But if you are wondering about it, get a cheap gold band and save your nice ering for non-working moments. Actually I think waitressing is hard on rings. It''s picking up heavy things, wet hands, and fast moving hands that can knock up against hard surfaces.

 

[Lynnchee]

As a partner, I make money if the restaurant itself makes a profit. Right now, as the economy is. We are breaking even. But even if I get to see the profit, the money goes right back into the business. (we''re a small family business)

When I am scheduled to be a server, I act as a server. I am not extra help, I am doing the same amount of work. I get paid the same base pay as the servers do and I get my share of the tips. If, however, we are unusually slow, and they could do without an extra server, I just act as a floor manager and no longer take tips.

But, even acting as manager, I still wait on some tables, and get tipped generously. But I don''t keep it if i''m not scheduled to be a server that night.

Usually, i''m just a floor manager or host. So, maybe I should just not wear the ring on days I know I''m waiting on tables.

 

[strmrdr]

Date: 6/9/2008 2:37:04 AM
Author: Lynnchee

Date: 6/8/2008 11:51:47 PM

Author: strmrdr

yes it likely will.

A friend of mine got into a huge fight with his fiance over it because she stopped wearing it at work because her tips went down.

They ended up breaking up but not really because of that but it was part of it.

Thats terrible! That makes me wonder if my fiance would understand if I started taking it off during work because of this reason. What do you choose though? To wear a gift given to you with love or a slightly bigger income.


At least, I would hope a person who normally tips 20% wouldn''t suddenly tip 10% just because they thought they didn''t need the money.

discuss it with him.
It was a trust/jealousy issue that broke them up and the ring being worn at work was only a small part of it.

 

[777_LDY]

I honestly never even thought about this but it's a very interesting topic.

A friend of mine works at a chain restaurant and she has a beautiful 1.5ct ring and I know she wears hers. She has worked there for at least 5 years because she has said herself she likes the tips. I have never heard her say anything otherwise, and she loves her job even though she really doesn't need to work very much.

We typically tip 20%, unless the service is really bad. I really don't think that someones ring would bother me, no matter the size. If anything I would enjoy being able to see it when I was being served! I mean, she would have to be working for a reason and I could really care less what that reason would be. Even if I knew I was being waited on by a manager in an upscale restaurant I would still leave the same tip as I would any waitress if the service was good. I would feel funny leaving if I didn't.