A waste of money?

[seeker78]

I bought her an eightstar because I wanted the best, and got sucked into the whole thing, which I look back on now and think is ridiculous, but I guess some people outgrow things quicker then others.i fi had it to do again, I wouldn''t. As far as comparing diamonds to other things, yes, there are other things that cost money, lots of things that cost LOTS of money, but nothing quite so overpriced and overhyped as diamonds. If you buy an expensive sports car at least you get to step on the gas and fly down the road, and trasport yourself from place to place in style, feeling the exhilaration. I''m not saying an expensive sports car is not a waste of money, i''m just saying it''s more fun and more useful. I''m sorry, but no matter what all you ladies tell yourselves so you can sleep at night, if you are "interacting" with your diamonds all the time, and admiring the pictures you posted on this sight, you need to get a life. it''s all a contest to see who can spend more money on something completely pointless. Let me put it this way... no matter what you say, 99 out of 100 of you could not tell the difference between a good CZ which is available now and your expensive stones, unless you had it taken to an appraiser or a gemologist... the difference is that you buy into the whole "diamonds are rare and magical and pure, and there is no substitute" thing, and would not get one for this reason. As far as who buys them, there are TONS of people who are NOT making very good money who buy diamonds for thousands of dollars, be it 2 thousand, or ten thousand, it''s still thousands of dollars better spent on something else in my humble opinion. Now you can get all defensive and bent out of shape becuase you think I''m being silly and offensive, and diamonds are your whole life (god forbid), but if you step outside the whole thing you might see my point.

 

[froufrou]

I should go on my boyfriend''s comic book forum and post "Don''t you think comics are a waste of money?"...that would be funny.

I think really the idea is, for most girls who like jewelry, we want our boyfriend to love us enough to get us something that we love and not necessarily something that he loves or thinks is "necessary". Gifts arent about what is necessary anyway. so the idea is you want him to love you and want to make you happy and for most people on this forum as far as i can tell, none of us think the guy should spend beyond his means or go into debt.

 

[ilovesparkles]

ROFL! How many pages is Mara''s thread? 18 and still going? If that isn''t interaction I don''t know what is. And this forum, is that interaction with other people? About our diamonds? I don''t think you have a point for the people that are here. If you think its a waste of money why did you buy and eightstar and not a ball of frozen spit? My guess. Because you wanted to make your woman happy!

 

[diamondfan]

Frou Frou, I agree! A gift is not supposed to be something that you need...how boring, like getting underwear or hankies for Christmas (and I know some people do get that, but hopefully along with some other great stuff!) A gift should be something you WANT, an indulgence, whatever that means to each person...

 

[froufrou]

but seeker, i couldn''t care less if i could step on the gas on a sports car. so for me a sports car WOULDN''t be more fun than a diamond so you can''t say, at least a sports car is more fun. people who have to do the step on the gas at the green light and go really fast in their sports cars are the ones who need to get a life! come ON, you DONT look that cool.

i hope you didn''t tell your fiancee you regret buying her that diamond!!

 

[seeker78]

First of all... your name is "I love sparkles"... do you really think you should be passing judgement on my opinions...? Secondly, if you had read what I wrote, I''m just trying to see if any of you can see my point, beyond disagreeing just because diamonds are how you spend your time...

 

[seeker78]

Alright...first of all I want to clarify saying I DON''T have a sports car... secondly, if you are that insecure that you need to know or think your boyfriend is spending thousands of dollars just to know he "cares" enough about you to buy you this thing, you need to evaluate the relationship... And there are gifts, and GIFTS... of course I''m not talking about underwear! I am talking about just not spending tons of money on diamonds thats all.

 

[KristyDarling]

Why are you here? This is a DIAMOND FORUM. Why don''t you start a "DIAMONDS ARE USELESS" forum and complain over there?

Your sports car analogy is pointless. The definition of what is "worth the money" is totally and completely RELATIVE. The exhilaration you feel while flying down the highway in a fancy sports car is akin to the exhilaration I feel when I look at my diamond. It is THAT beautiful. For you, it may be THAT fun to drive a sports car. Yes, diamonds and sports cars are both "wastes of money" in the grand scheme of things, but as to which one is better or more fun....it''s a waste of everyone''s time to even argue it! (at least you agree that a luxury like a sports car does have its merits...there''s a glimmer of hope that one day you''ll be able to understand why some people prefer to "waste" their money on diamonds, or on nice dinners out, or any other thing that you currently do not advocate)

 

[ilovesparkles]

Date: 6/6/2006 11:22:05 PM
Author: seeker78
I bought her an eightstar because I wanted the best, and got sucked into the whole thing, which I look back on now and think is ridiculous, but I guess some people outgrow things quicker then others.i fi had it to do again, I wouldn't. As far as comparing diamonds to other things, yes, there are other things that cost money, lots of things that cost LOTS of money, but nothing quite so overpriced and overhyped as diamonds. This is a completely false statement and you know it!

If you buy an expensive sports car at least you get to step on the gas and fly down the road, and trasport yourself from place to place in style, feeling the exhilaration. I'm not saying an expensive sports car is not a waste of money, i'm just saying it's more fun and more useful.
Perhaps in your humble opinion

You can still put the pedal to the metal in $10,000 car. And perhaps looking at diamonds is exhilarating

I'm sorry, but no matter what all you ladies tell yourselves so you can sleep at night, if you are 'interacting' with your diamonds all the time, and admiring the pictures you posted on this sight, you need to get a life. it's all a contest to see who can spend more money on something completely pointless. Let me put it this way... no matter what you say, 99 out of 100 of you could not tell the difference between a good CZ which is available now and your expensive stones, unless you had it taken to an appraiser or a gemologist...Again you are completely wrong. I can tell the difference between different colored diamonds and a CZ. They are not one in the same and I am willing to bet many on here can as well!


the difference is that you buy into the whole 'diamonds are rare and magical and pure, and there is no substitute' thing, and would not get one for this reason. As far as who buys them, there are TONS of people who are NOT making very good money who buy diamonds for thousands of dollars, be it 2 thousand, or ten thousand, it's still thousands of dollars better spent on something else in my humble opinion. Now you can get all defensive and bent out of shape becuase you think I'm being silly and offensive, and diamonds are your whole life (god forbid), but if you step outside the whole thing you might see my point.Face it you are getting bent out of shape because no one on a diamond forum will agree with you!

 

[froufrou]

i don''t think we are passing judgement on your opinions, I think what you wanted was our opinions and so we were posting them. You didn''t say "only post here if you agree with me", right?

but your point is "diamonds are a waste of money because they are not fun" etc. but if how we spend our time is looking at diamonds, we would disagree since diamonds are how we spend our time because it makes us happy to look at sparklies.

Which point is it you want us to see? Are you just saying see your point that there is a lot of advertising for diamonds which makes people buy them? Yes, i agree. Diamonds are expensive and a luxury item? Yes, I agree. Diamonds are overpriced? Not exactly because people are buying them at the prices they are, which must mean that people are getting the value from the diamond equal to the cost they paid, or they wouldn''t be buying it. (econ majors, ohh yeah we rock).

 

[seeker78]

"there''s a glimmer of hope that one day you''ll be able to understand why some people prefer to "waste" their money on diamonds, or on nice dinners out, or any other thing that you currently do not advocate"
Boy, you definately don''t know me... and how quick we are to defend and pass judgement... I say to you... maybe someday YOU will understand where I am coming from...

 

[firebirdgold]

I didn''t really see this as a thread about people who make fiscally irresponsible decisions and buy diamonds outside their means, but as wether or not diamonds are a waste of money. In fact this sounds more like a bad case of buyer''s remorse. It bothers me that you seem so resentful of being forced to spend your hard-earned money on a diamond ring for your beloved.

Sure deBeers markets diamonds throughly and controls the supply, but diamonds are no more overpriced or over-marketed than other stuff out there. And deBeers certainly did not invent the idea nor the desire for a diamond engagement ring. My memory is a bit hazy, but I''m pretty sure you can blame some british royalty for that one. And not all women even want or need a diamond engagement ring, I''ve tried to tell my bf it wasn''t necessary. I fiercely dislike the implication that I''ve been brainwashed by deBeers into forcing my guy to buy me an overpriced rock to prove his love. I''ve been brainwashed by my Mother!

Besides an engagement ring really is a symbol of a guy''s commitment and promise to marry a woman. (sometimes we need the physical proof, and sometimes guys need it too so they don''t run away screaming when she has a wedding dress melt-down). A symbol has a value of it''s own that really isn''t connected to it''s monetary worth.

 

[ilovesparkles]

Date: 6/6/2006 11:28:50 PM
Author: seeker78
First of all... your name is ''I love sparkles''... do you really think you should be passing judgement on my opinions...? Secondly, if you had read what I wrote, I''m just trying to see if any of you can see my point, beyond disagreeing just because diamonds are how you spend your time...

First of all, that was completely inappropriate and down right judgmental on your part! Your name is seeker78, should you really be passing judgment on me

Yeah my name is ilovesparkles, because I am on diamond forum. Its something else on others. Obviously you were never taught those simple phrases in childhood, "don''t judge a book by its cover" and "treat others how you wish to be treated"

Froufrou, you put it very well thank you.

If you don''t want others OPINIONS don''t ask for them!

 

[Cathers]

hehe, i have to laugh because you do know this is a diamond forum right seriously, yes, they are expensive and debeers does have great marketing. I''ve been on this site for over a year and have never heard anyone recommend going into debt for a diamond. diamonds are a luxury purchase. People buy them because they like them, not because they need them. They are no more a waste of many than many others things people choose to spend money on. ~Mrs. Salvo''s quote

Sorry Mrs! I wasn''t sure how to get it to copy and paste your name as well.

I am a bit late on this topic, but I couldn''t agree more with this statement. see: BOLD
As a matter of fact, I have seen the exact opposite, posters *strongly* recommending other PS''ers NOT to finance their diamond/setting purchase.
We do not have the money for the e-ring of my dreams right at this moment in time, so I wear a plain titanium band purchased off of ebay for about 30.00 USD. Heck, I would wear a twist tie if that was all we could afford. As long as it is from him and given in love, I would be proud to wear it.

 

[seeker78]

I am going to take a shot in the dark and say that most of you who are on this forum are middle aged women (or young women for that matter)... women who have there nice little diamonds, and don''t see their husbands very often, and when they do, are very disconnected... and therefore have to justify their exsitence by thinking..."oh well, he bought me a nice stone, he must love me tons"... You cling to that, and obsess about it, obsess about your diamonds and don''t really have a whole lot of anything else going on, cause let''s face it, if you did, you wouldn''t be here... So when I come in, a guy who offers a different opinion, based on experience, that contradicts your obsession, you jump all over me, saying I don''t know what I''m talking about, and diamonds are as valuable as anything else in life, and that any purchase is subjective, yada yada yada... Anything to preserve your standpoint... with names like "i love sparkles". I mean, do you really stand back and look at what you are saying...? how many people besides you, in your life, would realize and understand what you are about? And if they did, would you feel the need to lurk here?

 

[Diam100]

Here's my 2cents if your new insight has you posting on a diamond forum to see if others share your view I think the person you should sit down & talk to is your spouse.

I'm more interested in how that goes over with the spouse. Have her read your new insights on this thread. In the end, if it truly bothers you than donate it to a charity & take a tax write-off.

 

[blueroses]

Good for you, seeker, that you have "grown out" this. How nice for you.

How does your fiancee/wife feel about this? Does she love the eightstar? Or would she be perfectly happy for you to return it and give her a CZ instead?

Diamonds are a luxury item and they are OPTIONAL. It sounds like you have some serious buyer''s remorse, and that''s unfortunate. But belittling and condescending to people on a DIAMOND FORUM for heaven''s sake with some seriously cantankerous posts isn''t going to help people see your point, which--whether we agree with you or not--wouldn''t be so hard to see were it not for the haze of hostility in your posts!

Yes, many people don''t feel the way that we nutjobs over here on PS do about rocks. We KNOW we''re unusual, but we ENJOY our little insanity. Yes, there is a SERIOUS diamond marketing push which is silly and misguided and has nothing to do with love or marriage. But we PSers aren''t really the "diamond is forever" target audience--we''re the afficionados who do research and are practically foaming at the mouth with intrigue over these tiny specks of carbon. WE LOVE THEM!!!!!

I would guess that most PSers aren''t really the huddled masses at Zales--or even Tiffany--on February 13 trying to calculate 2 months salary to keep up with the Jonses. I''m not here because I''ve been programmed. I''m here because I love the artistry, design, and tradition of jewelry and it brings me happiness to share my HOBBY with others who feel that way. People can get engaged with a sim or a colored stone or a rolled up piece of tin foil. I agree that the DeBeers folks have guilted some people into spending too much on too little, and that''s too bad. But that does NOT indict the entire community of those who really DO like diamonds in the way you insinuate.

I guess what I''m trying to say is that we''re not drinking the koolaid. We''re just here for the sparkle.

 

[diamondfan]

Date: 6/6/2006 11:49:14 PM
Author: seeker78
I am going to take a shot in the dark and say that most of you who are on this forum are middle aged women (or young women for that matter)... women who have there nice little diamonds, and don''t see their husbands very often, and when they do, are very disconnected... and therefore have to justify their exsitence by thinking...''oh well, he bought me a nice stone, he must love me tons''... You cling to that, and obsess about it, obsess about your diamonds and don''t really have a whole lot of anything else going on, cause let''s face it, if you did, you wouldn''t be here... So when I come in, a guy who offers a different opinion, based on experience, that contradicts your obsession, you jump all over me, saying I don''t know what I''m talking about, and diamonds are as valuable as anything else in life, and that any purchase is subjective, yada yada yada... Anything to preserve your standpoint... with names like ''i love sparkles''. I mean, do you really stand back and look at what you are saying...? how many people besides you, in your life, would realize and understand what you are about? And if they did, would you feel the need to lurk here?

Again, you are on a jewelry site and forum. To each his own, this is a site for women and men who like stones and such. I do not think anyone here would consider a diamond a necessity over other things, or would want a rock and a bad marriage. Most of the people here are amazing and supportive and informed, there are other threads on this site that I would say have really helped people, and not just with diamond data.

PS I am 40 (middle aged) and have a big rock. went to grad school while having two of my three kids. As much as I like my ring, I actually do tear myself away from it long enough to get them to school, play with them, take care of things like food shopping, car repairs, homework, vet visits, making dinner, seeing friends, volunteering at school and for various charities...and yes, my dh is a hard working guy, but he loves what HE does and it works. I think before you throw around really inflammatory remarks about who people are inside, when you do not know us, you might think about how it makes you look. YOU chose to come on here and post, no one asked you to, and you are getting, as in life, a cross section of reactions. While most people here would say the love gems and are on the site for pleasure, they have their other interests too.

 

[Kaleigh]

Date: 6/6/2006 11:49:14 PM
Author: seeker78
I am going to take a shot in the dark and say that most of you who are on this forum are middle aged women (or young women for that matter)... women who have there nice little diamonds, and don''t see their husbands very often, and when they do, are very disconnected... and therefore have to justify their exsitence by thinking...''oh well, he bought me a nice stone, he must love me tons''... You cling to that, and obsess about it, obsess about your diamonds and don''t really have a whole lot of anything else going on, cause let''s face it, if you did, you wouldn''t be here... So when I come in, a guy who offers a different opinion, based on experience, that contradicts your obsession, you jump all over me, saying I don''t know what I''m talking about, and diamonds are as valuable as anything else in life, and that any purchase is subjective, yada yada yada... Anything to preserve your standpoint... with names like ''i love sparkles''. I mean, do you really stand back and look at what you are saying...? how many people besides you, in your life, would realize and understand what you are about? And if they did, would you feel the need to lurk here?

And you said we were being judgemental??? Puhlease!!!

 

[seeker78]

Wow. how profound! Yes, my fiance knows how I feel about it, and you know what...WOW, she''s actually intelligent enough to know what I mean by it, I think the reason you are incinuating otherwise is because you have distance between your husbands. You know what, even though it''s paid off, yes, if I could get the 8 grand back, I would... and I would actually do something more sensible with that money ( if you people can imagine that). But that is not the reason for this post. My reason was simply to see if any of you could see where I was coming from, or if you would scramble to defend your obsession with whatever means you possess. Guess which one you did?

 

[firebirdgold]

Date: 6/6/2006 11:49:14 PM
Author: seeker78
I am going to take a shot in the dark and say that most of you who are on this forum are middle aged women (or young women for that matter)... women who have there nice little diamonds, and don''t see their husbands very often, and when they do, are very disconnected... and therefore have to justify their exsitence by thinking...''oh well, he bought me a nice stone, he must love me tons''... You cling to that, and obsess about it, obsess about your diamonds and don''t really have a whole lot of anything else going on, cause let''s face it, if you did, you wouldn''t be here... So when I come in, a guy who offers a different opinion, based on experience, that contradicts your obsession, you jump all over me, saying I don''t know what I''m talking about, and diamonds are as valuable as anything else in life, and that any purchase is subjective, yada yada yada... Anything to preserve your standpoint... with names like ''i love sparkles''. I mean, do you really stand back and look at what you are saying...? how many people besides you, in your life, would realize and understand what you are about? And if they did, would you feel the need to lurk here?

Oh yeah, I''m willing to bet you''re super excited about getting married. I can just hear your voice overflowing with happiness and joy in life. HELLO?

That statement of yours pisses me off. My parents have been happily married for 42 years ! And my mother still goes on about how much she loves her diamond and how wonderful it made her feel that my father washed pots so he could buy her a diamond as perfect as their love. 42 freaking years and they still walk around hand in hand, and they''re still each other''s best friends and lovers.

Go to couples therapy and stop being such a Grinch on a diamond forum!

Oh, and for your information, I''m on this forum because a) I''m excited that I''ll be getting engaged soon, and b) I''ve made friends here.

 

[blueroses]

Date: 6/6/2006 11:49:14 PM
Author: seeker78
I am going to take a shot in the dark and say that most of you who are on this forum are middle aged women (or young women for that matter)... women who have there nice little diamonds, and don''t see their husbands very often, and when they do, are very disconnected... and therefore have to justify their exsitence by thinking...''oh well, he bought me a nice stone, he must love me tons''... You cling to that, and obsess about it, obsess about your diamonds and don''t really have a whole lot of anything else going on, cause let''s face it, if you did, you wouldn''t be here... So when I come in, a guy who offers a different opinion, based on experience, that contradicts your obsession, you jump all over me, saying I don''t know what I''m talking about, and diamonds are as valuable as anything else in life, and that any purchase is subjective, yada yada yada... Anything to preserve your standpoint... with names like ''i love sparkles''. I mean, do you really stand back and look at what you are saying...? how many people besides you, in your life, would realize and understand what you are about? And if they did, would you feel the need to lurk here?

I did my best to be magnanimous and give you the benefit of the doubt in my last post. This, however, is probably the most hateful, misogynistic, slanderous piece of vitriol that I’ve read in my 18 months on Pricescope. I''m 31. Neither very young nor middle-aged. I am not engaged. The only diamond I own is an heirloom from my precious aunt who was ripped from this world from cancer at the age of 56. There are MEN and women on this forum--if you learned how to use the search function you would probably find quite a bit of interesting demographic information, including that a LARGE percentage of us have graduate degrees. There are PS users of both sexes who are doctors, lawyers, scientists, you name it. There''s a thread on this topic in hangout. If you read it, perhaps your unfortunate and sexist assumption would quickly dry up.

And the countdown to banning starts........



NOW!

 

[lizz]

Seeker, I am sorry to hear that it is so offensive to you to make the woman of your dreams happy by getting her a lovely ring. Maybe she''ll see the light and FIND ANOTHER GUY, someone who deserves her and her many good qualities. Someone who is not bitter because he feels society is "making" him purchase a diamond for his engagement.

 

[seeker78]

Ha! I am not, in the least bit sexist! And, by the way, I have a great realtionship with my fiance! You people are funny, you get so upset when someone challenges your opinion.

 

[diamondfan]

Do you insinuate things about other''s marriages because you are fearful of the same thing happening in yours? Why would you assume someone''s love of diamonds has any relation to how close he/she is to their spouse? You have reiterated it more than once. It sounds like a case of projection, pure and simple. I guess that is what your wife to be has to look forward to, so you better let her keep her diamond so she has something to obsess over while you are out.

 

[firebirdgold]

Date: 6/7/2006 12:14:10 AM
Author: seeker78
Ha! I am not, in the least bit sexist! And, by the way, I have a great realtionship with my fiance! You people are funny, you get so upset when someone challenges your opinion.

No we get upset when someone INSULTS us!

 

[seeker78]

You people are amazing... I''M offensive? She should find another guy? Ha! Like I said, I shared your obsession for a little while, and bought her an eightstar, which is nicer than 99 percent of all your stones by the way, so shes all set. But, she does understand now that it''s total crap to spend all that money on a diamond, and she''s secure enough to know that it doesn''t mean I don''t love her, or think she''s worth it. You people are TOTAL products of what you are fed!

 

[lizz]

Date: 6/7/2006 12:14:47 AM
Author: diamondfan
Do you insinuate things about other''s marriages because you are fearful of the same thing happening in yours? Why would you assume someone''s love of diamonds has any relation to how close he/she is to their spouse? You have reiterated it more than once. It sounds like a case of projection, pure and simple. I guess that is what your wife to be has to look forward to, so you better let her keep her diamond so she has something to obsess over while you are out.

Diamondfan, I thought the SAME thing. If I''m not mistaken, you have a psych background too!

 

[aljdewey]

Date: 6/6/2006 11:22:05 PM
Author: seeker78

I bought her an eightstar because I wanted the best, and got sucked into the whole thing, which I look back on now and think is ridiculous, but I guess some people outgrow things quicker then others.i fi had it to do again, I wouldn''t.

This is so hysterical......I get it. *You* feel crappy because *you* have buyers remorse, and the only way to feel better about it is to crab about how everyone gets sucked in. HAHAHHAHA.....nice try.

Here''s a few truths:

1. Many folks don''t even remotely think a diamond is "rare". Please....if they were so rare, not every chick would have one, right? They just like em, and there''s nothing wrong with that.

2. Everyone has their own priorities. I frankly think it''s a total waste of money to buy a luxury car, and I''d way rather gaze at my diamond 68 times an hour than pay 10 times that just to speed in a luxury car. Who''s right? Neither one of us....because one size does not fit all. Everyone has different priorities, and that means many of them were fulfilling theirs when they decided to purchase a diamond. If it wasn''t a well-placed priority for you, you shouldn''t have done it.

3. Stop kidding yourself....you didn''t get mystically pulled toward the "aura" and follow like a sheep.

No, you realized a universal truth: that in this country, if you expect to spend any amount of horizontal bonding time with the opposite sex on a regular basis....and enjoy all the amenities (clean clothes, homecooked meals, etc. - whatever your definition of amenties is) of a long-term relationship, a token of SOME sort (diamond or otherwise) is called for. Not because DeBeers says so, but because it''s important to HER. (IN the old days, it wasn''t a diamond. It was a few cows and a chicken. Things haven''t really changed much.)

Are you really telling me that THOSE benefits aren''t as worthy as a ride in a sports car? If so, you are the one who needs to "get a life", my friend.

4. Ok, this is the big one. Ready? It''s about making HER happy. It''s not about whether or not *you* will enjoy it....it''s about what will make her happy. Since making her happy pays huge dividends toward your happiness, I''d say it''s a worthwhile investment....but that''s my perspective. If you don''t think so, though, I''d recommend having a heart to heart with your girl to explain why making her happy isn''t as important as refusing to feed the DeBeers beast, and how she''s being frivolous, and how you''d be happier returning the ring. (P.S. Be sure to report back to us and let us know how that goes for you.

)

 

[diamondfan]

Date: 6/7/2006 12:18:10 AM
Author: seeker78
You people are amazing... I'M offensive? She should find another guy? Ha! Like I said, I shared your obsession for a little while, and bought her an eightstar, which is nicer than 99 percent of all your stones by the way, so shes all set. But, she does understand now that it's total crap to spend all that money on a diamond, and she's secure enough to know that it doesn't mean I don't love her, or think she's worth it. You people are TOTAL products of what you are fed!

So you KNOW her ring is nicer than 99% of the people here? Did I miss in your post where you mention you are omniscent? Or have your personally read all the posts and made THAT remark based on facts? Clearly not. And I hope your fiancee really LOVES her ring, since it seems clear that she ain't getting nothin' else!